Adventure of Rekka Ch. 10

Marcus managed to look embarrassed, proud, and deliriously happy with Teresa all at once. Bill regained their attention with more laughter.

“Yeah, I’m not surprised at all. Don’t worry, I’m not jealous, Rekka likes my Biggius Dickius just fine. I guess it would be weird if a hero didn’t have a heroic schlong,” Bill said with humor. Unfortunately he lost his good humor considering his words.

“Hero,” he began, shaking his head with disgust before he went on, ”Sorry to ruin the mood, but I really don’t like the fact you guys call yourselves heroes. Just because some god makes you strong as fuck and you find a magic sword doesn’t make you a hero. The real heroes were the terrified people who stood on that wall. The ones who waited for you to kick in our gates with all that terrible strength. They were so absolutely certain you would kill us all, end all the happiness they had found. It pissed me the fuck off, a guy calling himself a hero coming to kill these people. My people.”

“I was fucking eager to go have a quiet word with you.”

Bill paused to look them over, glad to see Marcus appeared to at the very least not dismissing his words. He was certain Teresa was just thinking about the new profanity Bill had just taught her. The couple were somehow charming enough that he was finding it easier to hold the anger back.

He’d have to rattle off Mr. Carlin’s deservedly famous bit for Teresa before he ran them off. She’d probably explode. Or adopt him. Bill reluctantly pushed away amusing thoughts to return to the business at hand. That was getting easier every day, he’d be angrier still if he realized it.

“A real hero, a guy I’d be happy to apply that label to.. That person would defend any community from someone that wanted to kill them. Kill them for no other reason than what they are, who they are, not even attempting to understand what they were fighting. I wouldn’t care who the hell that person was. Just as long as that person was in any way like those wives and husbands waiting to defend their home and loved ones, believing they would die, and willing regardless. Like these people, without a doubt that person would be a real hero,” Bill finished, wondering how his people, these fiercely brave women and their loving husbands put up with having such a total shitheel like him leading them. He laughed to himself then, he sure wished they’d see their error soon. His last act as mayor would make the day an official holiday, his very next act would be to raise hell with those goblins.

“I know what you mean, I really do,” Marcus said, looking intensely embarrassed, “It was unbearable until I heard it so often as to become numb to it. I’m certain Teresa believed my red face and stutter were natural when she first came to me. The only way I managed was the hope that I’d live up to the title someday, and save humanity from.. to stop what I was so sure would end them. In the only way I knew.”

Bill was honestly surprised, he had been certain these people just hung that title on strong as fuck guys with magic swords. Hell, they’d probably call him that while they burned him at the stake. He had all the qualifications apparently, the sword would vouch for him. He was sure they didn’t even consider how any new idiot with a magic sword they found might be a complete scumbag, and if he was, they would not have the ability to believe still calling him a hero was very nearly a crime.

He might admit to himself he wasn’t always right, but he knew he couldn’t be trusted so he would just examine the idea from afar. These two sure seemed to be confirming it anyway. Bill was also sure Marcus’s viewpoint was not at all the most popular one.

“Damn, Marcus. There might be some hope for you yet. Hell, maybe someday you will be a hero. A real one. If you manage it I won’t even give you shit about it, I’d just be happy there was one roaming around. A bad motherfucker defending and helping anyone who desperately needed a hero. No matter if they have tails and beautiful eyes,” Bill finished, his eyes lovingly drinking in his at one time strange and always beautiful Rekka, all of her. Every bit.

Marcus’s sharp intake of breath caused Bill to roll his eyes, knowing what was coming. If Rekka were not in his sight he was sure this would have ended the conversation.

“Yeah, that’s my wife. Her name is Rekka, and she’s beyond beautiful. What you can see and what you can’t as well. Not with your eyes. Maybe more so, she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, but her fierce, fierce love.. for her friends, for anyone, anyone that can see how much she wants to protect those who need it. How fearless she is. She’s so beautifully caring she can love even me.” He shook his head, hardly able to believe it. Still, he was simply incapable of doubting Rekka in any way.

“Like my anger for what a hero was capable of, what a hero could be so proud of. I can’t express my love for her in words, and her for me. I can only be thankful to be with her here and now, I surely don’t deserve her love. Despite anything else that may happen to me, I can only be thankful.”

Bill smiled at his wife, truly unsure how he’d managed to pull off such a shamefully reprehensible suckerpunch squarely on reality’s chin in order to find her his, to be hers. It was his greatest con, surely the most complicated assortment of bald faced lies and vicious cheapshots the multiverse had ever seen. He couldn’t be prouder.

Marcus had been ready to ask Bill to call off the hellhound, she looked as though she would attack them at any moment. He did not wish to put Teresa through the distress of beating him to a pulp as she defended the.. woman that would almost certainly be attempting to rip out his throat.

After Bill’s heartfelt confession he would feel ashamed to even suggest it, and not foolish enough to dare. Looking into Teresa’s beautiful eyes, he understood well how Bill would react. Someone would certainly die, and he no longer felt confident in his own strength, which he had carelessly believed would allow him to defeat any enemy he faced. He felt again the unfamiliar thrill of fear within him as Bill turned back, his expression no longer filled with any sign of love as he looked he and Teresa over.

“Don’t you dare call her a monster. Not because I’m very willing to break that oath of Teresa’s and break your nose the other way when I do it. If you knew her in any way, you would see she is the farthest thing from a monster. She would protect any child with her life, don’t bother to doubt me, it’d be as natural as breathing for her. She’d die defending any baby you might have, Teresa. Your baby, Marcus. She’d kill for them, too, which I would far prefer. That would be even easier than breathing for her.” Bill stared them down for a moment, wondering if Marcus would open his mouth and ruin what had been mostly a surprisingly enjoyable conversation.

Marcus looked between Bill and one of the most dangerous, most terrible.. women, as Bill would say, that he had ever been taught. Surely there were more powerful.. women, but most did not inspire half the fear in his people as one of.. her people. Seeing the devotion Bill had for her, he could almost believe everything he had known was lies. Almost. He was certain she was going to jump through the window and drag Bill away soon. He hoped that was what she would do, in any case. He returned his attention to Bill.

“I will not call her that, it would not be.. valorous. I’m not sure I can believe it, I’m honestly surprised she allowed you to approach me at all. She clearly doesn’t want you near me even now. You’re a scoundrel, I think you would even agree with me, but it appears your bravery is also without question. Not only for.. breaking my nose, more so for finding such love in so fierce a woman.”

He looked the possibly not evil man over for a moment.

“Today. This morning should not have gone the way it did. I am not being prideful, not now. Had I not been such a fool you would be thoroughly dead, and I would have.. proudly murdered people I would never believe could even understand love. I’m fairly certain no one outside of this town will ever believe what you did,” Marcus confessed, suddenly able to feel a little admiration for this man’s audacity.

He was certain there was simply no other man in the world who would attempt what would normally be the surest of suicide methods. Certainly none that could succeed, if there was anyone else like that the world might be a far different place. When the mad man had agreed to face him and climbed down that rope both he and Teresa were entirely surprised. The offer was merely the correct way to go about things, the correct response was to uselessly fire arrows at them while he cut through the gate. Clearly Bill was better at finding answers than most.

“Some would certainly call you mad, though I am beginning to believe you are just.. very, very angry. I.. would like to meet her, Rekka. The way you speak of her makes me believe it would be a very worthwhile experience. Though I can’t completely trust your judgement, as I said you are a scoundrel.. but I will respect your wishes.” Teresa seemed to agree, even smiling at Rekka. Rekka didn’t see it, the man who had no such unbreakable oath to not harm her husband was her sole focus.

Bill was heartened to see the smile, if he saw more and better from them they would soon be out of his hair and happily fucking each other heroically as they pleased. Hopefully as far from here as possible.

“Good enough. It was kind of funny at first, watching Rekka scare the shit out of most people we met. It stopped being funny pretty quick. She doesn’t deserve that shit. Not from people who don’t threaten us. Her reputation otherwise is far more fierce than you people can possibly understand and highly appreciated by anyone she calls friend.”

Bill hoped they could see her as he did. The more people that did, the happier he became.

“Don’t fuck around and find out again Marky. I’m pretty much harmless compared to her, and I knocked you the fuck out. I won’t be responsible for what terrible things she’ll do to you if she has to. If she absolutely has to,” Bill told them, deeply proud of Rekka’s reputation in this regard, he hoped the entire world would soon see her as he did. They’d better hope they saw her with no violent intentions of their own, or they’d believe Bill was a far better liar than he truly was.

The smile Bill didn’t know was spread with pride across his face disappeared as he considered Marcus’s request. He would have to explain their situation a little more clearly.

“You’re not going to get near her unless you’ve done something very, very stupid. I don’t want you within arms length of any woman, any of my people within this town or otherwise. Like I said, you’re too dangerous to trust Marky. I’ll take some truly stupid risks, hell I’m pretty much known for it. Not with Rekka. Not with anyone who’s been stupid enough to consider me their leader, I don’t know how they put up with me. Maybe if we get to know each other better, maybe that could change. You’re right about me being angry. Since I met you two I can barely control it. Hell, I get angry with myself for how I’m letting it get to me. It’s a vicious damn cycle. Anyway, it’s just too soon, and honestly.. If I knew a surefire way to safely send you two away to raise your children and never bother anyone again I’d do it. Right the fuck now. I can’t think of a bald-faced lie or trick dirty enough to make that happen, so I’m damn sure it’s impossible.”

“I understand, be what you may, you are clearly not careless. I.. I hope you are not what I believed you to be, Bill. If you are not, I understand completely how you feel now. Believe me or not, I know I’m speaking the truth,” Marcus looked down at Teresa, knowing despite the awful circumstances they now found themselves in, he was thankful for the results of his failure. In more ways than this, if what Bill had told them could be believed. He tore his eyes away from Teresa to give Bill nearly as deadly serious a look as he had received. He wasn’t nearly as practiced as Bill yet. He also lacked his natural talent for deception.

“Do not make the mistake of harming Teresa. If you do, I will do everything within my.. considerable power to show you what should have happened this morning. To you. I’ll not harm anyone who does not threaten us, I’m sure you can respect that at least. Do not test me on this. You are right, I am dangerous. I don’t like it now, I’m not sure I ever did. I’ll know I was truly blessed if I can be dangerous enough to pay you back for any harm to the woman I love. If you’ve spoken truly I believe you’ll understand my feelings completely.”

Teresa fell in love all over again, wishing Bill would see how good a man Marcus truly was, hero or not. She also dearly hoped Marcus would not hurt anyone. She hoped he would not do such a thing, though she knew he might if he was sure it would save her. So they could go far away as Marcus said. To love each other. It would be so fucking wonderful. It would be so much fucking better if no one was hurt to achieve it.

“Goddamn, Marky. You hold on to that feeling. Think about how that makes you feel. We’re on the exact same page here, if I can trust you. I can’t, I won’t. I’m not as good a person as I wish I was, and that’s surely why I and those I care for aren’t dead yet. I’m going to keep you here for as long as it takes to safely remove you. I’m sure I can make this happen, I’ve managed a lot of crazy shit to keep people alive. Just give me time,” he asked,his voice strained by his anxiety.

He lost the earnest hopeful expression as the frustration of this very stupid standoff ate away at him.

“Don’t make me kill you. I won’t enjoy it anymore. Not like I would have this morning. I don’t like that part of me, and it was you two that brought it out of hiding. I could have gone my entire life not knowing if I could kill someone and been far, far happier for it. I haven’t killed anyone, but now I know I can,” Bill told them, though he seemed to be talking to himself and was deeply unhappy at what he was hearing. After a moment he focused back across the minefield.

“It would be best if you just think of this as a vacation. If you just stay here fucking each other unconscious you’ll fit right in. Hell, when I do figure out how to kick you out of my town you’ll probably tell me to fuck off and stop banging on your door.”

Marcus and Teresa actually smiled at that, Marcus looking a bit embarrassed as well. Teresa was shameless in a far different way than Bill was, and was simply happy they wouldn’t be disturbed while they fucked.

“Ok, I’m honestly relieved you two aren’t the scum of the earth, I was dearly hoping you weren’t. I’d like to stay and chat, but another fucking emergency cropped up and I’ve got to go make that emergency regret it ever heard the name Biggius Dickius.”

Bill was suddenly sure this would not be the case. These Order fucks didn’t deserve to meet such a colorful character as Biggius Dickius Primus. Biggius sure as hell didn’t need to see them. He wasn’t certain if he liked the idea, but maybe they would meet the real him. He wondered if he’d like who that was afterward, only sure he wouldn’t let his doubts hold him back.

“That means I’ve got to return to being the asshole you met earlier. If you behave this isn’t even going to be an issue. Christ I really just want you two to stay in here and make babies, I really fucking do. Teresa, please look at me,” Bill ordered politely.

Teresa dutifully gave her complete attention to the possibly, so very hopefully, not-in-fact most vile evil she’d ever encountered.

“Once I leave this room you can allow Marcus to leave the bed, but all of my other orders stand. If Marcus is able to hurt anyone I want you to follow those orders, except you will continue your violence until he’s no threat to anyone, not ever again. You use every fancy punch or kick you know. You are not to hold back, you will not allow harm to come to my people. I suggest you take that to heart, Marcus. I love these people like family. We don’t kill families. We’re no heroes. Food and drink will be dropped off at your door. Some new bedding as well, I’m thinking. Teresa, only you can retrieve that.”

Teresa nodded unhappily, consenting to the order despite having no ability to refuse. Bill’s conscience decided not to hang itself, if only for that nod. In fact, it felt like it might be up to try feeling bad about fucking over some other people now.

“I will do everything I can to keep Marcus distracted by fucking him so very fucking well. I’m sure he is no longer a threat to you, he is so terribly good and honorable. Still, I will fuck the.. the shit, yes. I’ll fuck the shit out of him until you are able to release us. I fucking hope so dearly you have not misled us, that would be.. so fucking shit. Just the fucking worst, Bill,” Teresa begged him, sure she would be unable to bear it if this was all some terrible trick.

“You do that, Teresa, that’s one order I’m happy to give you. Marcus, I swear to God if you don’t harm anyone.. don’t harm the people I love so much.. I will find some way for you two to safely leave this place free and happy. As happy as I’m sure you will be once you get those kids you want. Once you've gotten as far away from me as possible, I’m sure. I’d damn well appreciate it, anyway. You two are taking years off my life with this stress, damn it. I know how a lot of people feel about me now, I’m sorry I ever met you two,” Bill grumbled out, completely serious until he considered it fully.

“Sorry and glad. Despite my ulcers, running into me yesterday was probably the best thing that could have happened to you and probably a lot of innocent women. I plan on making this world a better place. If I’d met you when I was ready to force this world to give peace a chance.. It would not have gone well for you. You’d have gotten the chance to know exactly how those women felt on that wall. Difference is your orphans would be taken care of like our own. Shit, I don't regret you coming here at all, now. Glad to have you, in fact. I’m certain you’ll agree with me eventually,” Bill spoke, wishing he was as certain as he appeared. He was desperately hopeful Marcus wasn’t still waiting for his chance to be a fucking hero.

“I’m starting to believe you two aren’t the evil bastards I assumed you were. I hope you feel the same. We’re in this together now. Please leave me to at least attempt to fix the rotten mess inflicted on this world. I like it here, I just want my kids to like it too. God damn, I so fucking want my kids to be happy, Teresa. I’m sure you know how I feel, let’s just get through this without killing each other. Christ you two are fucking going to make my hair fall out.”

Bill nodded at them then, standing and turning his back to them. Stupid as hell, but he needed to know if Marcus would take this chance to rip his heart out. He trusted Rekka and Tabitha to put him down, though she’d chew him out in a second for this stunt. He just had to know if Marcus would try it.

He hoped he was a bit faster and ready to run out of here like the coward he was and leave Rekka and Tabitha to their fun. He was sure Marcus wouldn’t expect him to shriek like a slasher movie starlet and crash right through the back wall. It might disgust the heroic idiot just long enough for Bill to save his own sorry hide. He waited a few seconds, taking his time putting his chair back. Nobody died, he was only slightly surprised.