All Comments on 'Alistaire Ch. 02: Mary'

Even your 'devious, convoluted conspiracies' are adorable. Pub, you're burning up my stars at a furious rate...justifiably, of course...but still furious.

The problem with this chapter is its brevity. Wonderful storytelling, this chapter should have been a lot longer. However, it still deserves a five stars rating from this reader.

Damn...... Wish i'd have had a set of twins when I was in school..... LOL..... Awesome again!!!! Good job!!!

Kinda saw that one coming, but damn, still hot as fuck.

Great story, somehow better than the first. I would love to see the twins break through their barrier and ride him at the same time (one on his cock and one on his face)

So well written, fun & sexy! Look forward to reading more of your stories!

Great Love Story. Two Hot Girls that Love to Fuck RW Five Stars

Really, a very talented five star writer. Classy, humorous, and entertaining pornography. A bit of constructive criticism: proofread, proofread, proofread!

Only a couple of spelling errors and, let's face it, it is impossible to find all of our own errors due to our familiarity with the content. It takes a fresh set of eyes to discover many of them. Professional publishers use many fresh sets, or at least used to, not sure anymore.

I love the style and the pace. Am looking forward to the next one.

Need to keep your characters James straight. First chapter we had Carrie and Mary. Now it's Maddie and Mary. Make up your mind

Anony,

I am very bad with names, but this ain’t that time.

Maddie isn’t in the first chapter, and Carrie isn’t in the second. VERY different girls.

Maybe read just a LITTLE?

Yes, you may count on the fact I am going to keep reading this series...why would I quit, after that surprise of the twins taking turns with Al??!!

And, even I could follow the thing about the twins...Maddie was MENTIONED in 1st chapter, but did not show up until the 2nd...DDDUUUHHHHHH!!!!!!

AL IS going to have his hands full...summer with Carrie, Mary, and Maddie; plus, when he gets back to school with his female buddies Beth, Bridget, and (I cannot recall the 3rd's name!!??). Anyway...lots to anticipate for the next chapter(s)...

Another Five**5**Star submission...why I keep coming back!!!!!

Pretty damn good dude, I love your characters blend of self deprecating humour and sex, the girls sense of fun and naughtiness is pretty much on point as well, knocked it out of the park! 5⭐️👍

Holy shitballs... for a fantasy, i really like how you place the caracters and all that, i feel it... 5stars

awesome

Just read the second. Plan to read them all. Like the first, this is a 5.

… “ I really wanted to beat my chest and scream _at_ the world. “

Wow. Slides in to home on a two game stretch and the away team allows a forced double play! The crowd goes wild!

Sorry.