AMA - The Boyfriend Ch. 171-180

"What about sex?" she asked. "Last night she was involved, but you two barely touched each other."

I took a breath and turned us so that I could lean back on the hot tub. "That's more complicated," I said. "We've been intimate, but not full on."

"But you've been sexual with me, Becca, Cattie and Leia," she said. "Plus lots of other stuff with a bunch of the other girls. Ami?"

"That's for Ami to tell," I said.

"So partially," Wanda read me. "So sex with four other women, which I know she is wanting you to do so I'm not blaming you or anything, and other stuff with others. And you're saying I Love You to at least me and Cattie. Becca?"

I nodded. "She hasn't said it back."

"She will," Wanda sighed. "Leia?"

I shook my head.

"But getting there?"

"Probably," I said.

"Ami?"

"Yeah."

"Robbie, your fiancee needs you," Wanda said.

"We're taking our time to figure that out," I said.

"Robbie," she said again. "Cassidy needs you. She is making all of these big gestures, and yes she isn't exactly suffering with them since she's a horny bisexual, but she's making them all over the place. She knows you love her, but I think she needs tofeel it."

I closed my eyes and hung my head a little, trying to think of where I was at.

"She's the love of your life, Robbie," Wanda said. "Are you doing this because you're not ready, or are you holding out because you still want to punish her? There isn't a wrong answer, but you need to know what it is."

"Fuck," I sighed. I wasn't sure.

"It's the second one," Wanda said. "You know it is. You won't be able to figure out what to do without admitting it."

"It is," I said. "I'm holding out because I'm still fucking mad."

Wanda released my hands and wrapped her arms around my neck, hugging me tightly and whispering to me. "It's OK to be mad. It's OK to feel fucking furious with her for all the shit she did back then. But neither of you are going to be OK until you can be OK with feeling that for a bit."

I hugged her back, feeling her body against mine. "How are you so good at this?" I asked.

"Because I'm furious at Brody, and I don't know if I'm going to get over it," she whispered.

I held her, and she started crying, and then I started crying. We weren't loud about it, weren't sobbing. We held each other and let ourselves just feel the dark things that were clutching at us.

"I love you," she said, burying her face into the crook of my neck.

"I love you, too," I said, holding her sides tightly.

"What are you going to do about Cassidy?" she asked.

"When she first told me, she asked if I wanted to hate-fuck her. I don't think it's like that, but I do think we need to reconnect. Make-up sex, even if it won't be all the way made up," I said.

I could feel those cheeks of hers tighten as she smiled. "It can take more than one round, and more than one night, to get there. As long as you are getting there."

"What about you? I don't know what's going on with you and Brody," I said.

She sniffed. "Do you want to know?"

"I want to know what you want me to know," I said. "I want to be able to support you like you're supporting me. Me loving you isn't just because of the sex."

She looked into my eyes, hers still somewhat brimming with tears, and then hugged me again as she rested her forehead on my shoulder. "I think my husband is a cuckold," she said quietly. "And that's not the kind of man I wanted to be married to."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I- You know we have an open travel sex policy," Wanda said. "And I've flirted and fooled around a little bit with some kissing, but I kind of fibbed that first night with you and Cass. I've never gone as far as that before, let alone where we're at now. Well, I knew Brody was doing things on his trips. I just didn't realize he was going to BDSM clubs. I thought it was weird how into hearing about our first encounter he was, and when I tried talking to him this morning he was even more into it, which was weird to me because I was feeling guilty about not just participating in the sex, but about the kink stuff. The ownership-play stuff, and falling in love with you and Cass. And so I started asking some questions I knew I didn't want the answer to, and I- Brody isn't the man I thought I married. I don't want to shame him for whatever he's getting out of it, but I don't know how I feel about him hiding this from me either. I- He should have told me that this was what he wanted, and I could have made an informed decision about our relationship. Now..."

"Now everything feels different," I said quietly.

She nodded. "I look back at things, and choices we made as a couple. Did he push to live in a certain neighbourhood for a reason? Did he take certain jobs for a reason? Did I give up things so that he would have a chance to visit some famous sex club? Does he even love me, or just the fact that I have a hundred thousand followers on the internet that want me?"

"I'm so sorry, Wanda," I said quietly, holding her tightly.

"Robbie, I want to feel owned and treasured, and he wants me to be a hotwife slut," she sobbed. "This is why he was never able to do the things I asked, because he wanted to watch someone else do it to me instead."

I just held her. What could I say?

Oh, right. There was one thing I could say.

"Wanda, I love you," I said quietly. "Whatever you need, I'm here for you. So is Cassidy."

"I know," she said, raising her face and kissing me softly even while she was still crying silent tears. "I think that's the only reason I could hold it together today. I love you, too."

Chapter 175

Wanda and I held each other for a little while longer before she helped me carry the last of the stuff down below deck.

It was a bit of chaos, or maybe more 'calm before the storm' down there. JC was sitting in the living area, bouncing one knee nervously as he did something on his phone. Heather was sitting on the couch with Sherry and Ginnie talking animatedly while Cattie was in the kitchen with Leia making up a big bowl of popcorn and glancing over at her girlfriend occasionally.

I went into the kitchen and gave both Leia and Cattie kisses on the cheek. "Cassidy wants to bust out some card games tonight. Are you two interested?"

"Um, maybe," Leia said. "Gin and I were thinking of doing another movie."

"I think Heather and Sherry are joining for that," Cattie said. "I'm definitely in for the games though."

"Cool, sounds good," I nodded, turning to take the stuff Wanda had carried for me and stow it away in the cupboards where I'd found it.

"Hey, Leia," Wanda said. "Has Cassidy talked with you yet?"

"Um, no?" Leia said with a slightly worried lilt, glancing at me briefly. "Is something up?"

"No, no," Wanda shook her head. "Nothing to worry about. Come talk with me for a sec?"

"Sure," Leia said, following Wanda back into the hallway towards the cabins.

"Uh-oh," Cattie said, sliding in next to me and wrapping an arm around my waist. "Trouble in paradise?"

"I doubt it," I said. "I think I know what that's going to end up being."

"It's the hat thing, isn't it?" Cattie guessed.

"You know about the hat thing?" I asked.

"Tiger, Cassidy told me," Cattie smiled. "And I'm a little flattered that I inspired it."

"You looked super cute, what can I say?" I asked.

Cattie glanced over at the living area where Heather, Ginnie and Sherry were talking and dropped her voice low. "I'd... really like to sleep snuggled up with you and Cass again tonight," she said.

"Any time you want," I replied, pulling her into a full hug. "Though Wanda will be with us tonight so the bed would be crowded, but you're still welcome."

"I wish I could," Cattie said into my shoulder as she hugged me back. "God, you make me feel safe."

I wasn't sure what to say about that so I gave her one last extra squeeze. Heather had seen us hugging and was scowling lightly in our direction. I let go of Cattie and she took one small step back to separate us. "So cards tonight then?"

"Only as long as it isn't some dumb betting or daring game," Cattie said with a slight grimace.

"Nope," I shook my head. "It'll be the nerdy ones Cass and I brought."

"Then I'm in," she nodded.

"OK, I'll make sure we find you when we decide where we're playing," I promised.

"Thanks," she smiled, then hooked my fingers with hers briefly to stop me from going yet. "Love you," she mouthed softly.

I wanted to say it back, but Heather was still watching us from behind Cattie and could see my lips so I just smiled and gave Cattie a wink instead. She smiled back, knowing why, and squeezed my fingers a little before letting go.

With Wanda and Leia disappearing into the back rooms, I crossed over to the Singles Boat and found that the living area over there was just as crowded. Things quickly developed from there as the girls started to decide what they wanted to do for the evening. I managed to sneak a little chaste kiss with Ami before she, Zenya and Heels set up Ami's switch to play Mario Party and borrowed some controllers from Leia. JC ended up joining them. For her part Leia decided to watch the movie with Ginnie, Heather and Sherry in the living area of the Couples Boat, which meant both spaces were taken up, so the rest of us decided to head up to the top deck to play cards.

Cassidy and I, like many of the girls on the trip, were nerds. It just came with the cosplay territory. We had brought a variety of nerdy dice and card games that weren't very rules-heavy or technical and were meant to be party games; we often brought them along to Cons so we could play with new and old friends alike.

The six of us sat out on our butts on the astroturf after moving the deck chairs out of the way since we didn't have a table. All of the girls were comfortably sitting cross-legged, so I was the only one who had to shift around and got ragged on for needing to do more yoga to work on my flexibility.

Looking around the circle as we started with Sushi Go I couldn't help but grin to myself. Cassidy and Cattie were both giggling at a comment that Terra had made, all three of them familiar with the game, while Wanda was looking through the cute art on the cards with a big smile. She glanced up at me and I nodded, letting her know I agreed that the little sushi art was cute, making her smile a little more. Meanwhile, Becca was reading over the rules of the game, making sure she understood the intricacies (of which there weren't that many.) The fact that it was the exact same thing I did when I was learning a new game made me feel a warmth in my chest, again realizing how similar we were.

We played a full game of Sushi Go, all of the girls getting into it quickly and all of us chatting both about the game and life away from the trip. All of the girls were full-time on being models and worked hard to develop their workflows and audiences. Outside of their looks, they were known for somewhat different things. Terra was also a traditional model and knew the most about that world. Becca was excellent at photo editing and created beautiful lighting effects both manually and in post. Cattie was known for her snarky demeanour online and had garnered a following that way. Wanda and Cassidy were more 'generalist' but each had a different sort of online profile that matched their personalities - Cassidy had a better following on social media in general, but Wanda had developed her monetization to a higher degree.

I felt like a bit of an imposter, sitting and playing with them. Sure, I was a sometime stand-in on some of Cassidy's shoots as either a model or a photographer, but I wasn't a pro like any of them. My work was completely different from theirs - I wasn't a public figure. I was the behind-the-scenes guy at the hotel most of the time, networking with vendors and maintenance and the managers of acts and clients.

And yet somehow I fit with these gorgeous women.

"Let's play Secret Hitler," Cassidy said once she had secured a victory in Sushi Go, with Becca just a couple of points behind her, and me one behind Becca.

"As long as we don't have to draw moustaches on our faces," Terra smirked. "I don't think I could pull that off."

I rolled my eyes, "No, no moustaches. I'm going to go grab some drinks, anyone want anything?"

Inundated with requests, I decided to just stock up our cooler and bring it up.

Chapter 176

Officially armed with alcohol - beers for me, Cassidy and Becca, and quick mixes for Cattie, Wanda and Terra - we set about playing Secret Hitler. It was a simple party game where we each got assigned a secret role, one of us being the 'secret fascist,' and another being the 'secret Hitler' while the rest were liberals. It was a more complicated version of the classic 'Werewolf' party game with more mechanics, but Cassidy and I both had the accompanying app on our phones. Once we'd narrated the rules to the others, with Cattie's help, and Becca had done a once over of the actual rules sheets, we handed out the envelopes with the secret roles.

I was a liberal, and the game commenced.

It was a shit show. Not mechanically - the app helped keep things straight in terms of what we needed to do next, but for all that the girls and I had big smiles the entire time... they were all so sneaky!

At any given point in the game I thought Cassidy, Cattie and Becca were the Secret Hitler. Then I got assassinated, accused of being Hitler myself, and revealed that I was a liberal.

In the end, Terra was elected Chancellor and revealed that she was, in fact, the Secret Hitler. Becca had been her fellow secret fascist.

We played another round, and this time I had gotten the secret fascist card and Cattie was my secret Hitler. Things didn't go so smoothly as last time - the game was designed for up to 10 people, and with a smaller group of 6 Cattie got identified early as a member of the fascists and with only two fascists in the group, when the assassination option came around she got picked off and we lost.

We moved on to Zombie Dice, a simple game where you took turns rolling dice trying to collect survivors instead of zombies, and we all relaxed and started chatting again. I was on my third beer, having gone through two during the stress of Secret Hitler, and most of the girls were on their second or third drinks as well and everyone was happily buzzed but nowhere near tipsy.

I eventually won the Zombie Dice and the girls decided not to break out another game and to instead play a drinking game. Cattie ruled out anything with dares or bets, just like she'd said before, and I backed her up, and the girls settled on 'Never Have I Ever.'

"Never have I ever had a threesome," Becca declared. The first couple of questions had been fairly tame, getting almost everyone a couple more sips into their drinks, but Becca with her buzzed grin, a slight flush to her cheeks and a glint in her eye obviously wanted this to be more interesting.

Cattie, Wanda, Cassidy and I all took sips.

"Never have I ever had a threesome that included someone not in this circle," Terra said almost right after.

It took me a second to do the math and remember exactly who I'd done what with, and Cassidy and I both sipped. Leia counted, since she was downstairs, and Cassidy- well, Cassidy. Noticeably Wanda and Cattie both didn't drink, getting little teasing 'ooohs' from Becca and Terra.

"Never have I ever kissed someone better at kissing than Robbie," Cassidy declared, going next.

None of the girls drink, making me grin, and I took a sip of my beer. "Can't kiss myself," I said. "So everyone is better at kissing me than me."

That got some eye rolls and laughs.

"Never have I ever gone skinny dipping," Cattie declared.

Everyone but Becca drank. "Hold on," I said. "You did so, Cattie. During the card game."

"Oh, shit!" Cattie laughed. "I totally forgot about that what with-" She flushed, biting her lip, and then took a drink to cover her embarrassment. The girls all laughed since they knew what else had happened that night.

It was my turn. "Never have I ever given a blowjob," I said.

"Laaame," Cassidy called as all of the girls drank. "No more ones that are obvious, Tiger."

"Fine, fine," I said with a smile.

"Never have I ever been so horny as on this trip," Wanda said and immediately took a drink. The rest of us all took one as well. "At least I'm not alone!" Wanda laughed.

"Never have I ever thought about being in an orgy," Becca said, back around to her turn.

Cassidy, Terra and I all drank.

"What kind of orgy?" Wanda asked us.

"I mean... porn logic?" I said. "Though most often, on the off day that I actually do watch porn, I usually come up with little relationships in my head for the porn."

The girls all gave me little awes at that.

"Just standard stuff, I think," Terra offered. "Doing swimsuit and underwear modelling on sets means there's some casual nudity as we're changing and that sort of thing. No one makes it a big deal. Every once in a while I wonder 'What if we all just started fucking?'"

The girls turned to Cassidy, who flushed. "I, uh- well, I've been in an all-girl orgy before, if that counts?" she said.

"How many girls?" Wanda asked.

"Fourteen, including me," Cassidy said.

"Holy shit," Becca said. "That's a lot of boobs and butts." That got laughs out of everyone, including Cassidy.

"Never have I ever had a wet dream," Terra declared. "But I think I might have one tonight!"

More laughs, and Cassidy, Cattie, Wanda and I all took sips.

"What are they like?" Becca asked. "I've never dreamed about sex before - I don't really remember any dreams, usually."

"I don't know about you girls," Cattie said. "But most of the time a sex dream is more like... a feeling than a 'scene.' Little bits might stand out, like someone's face or hands, or the feeling of being touched or even penetrated, but it's not like a porno."

"Same," Cassidy agreed.

"I had a full-on scene one once," Wanda said. "Then I woke up and realized it hadn't been a dream at all." She scrunched up her nose and stuck out her tongue a little at Cassidy and I.

"Mostly the same for me," I said. "Feelings, and maybe like a tiny 'gif' worth of action."

"Who did you dream about?" Cassidy asked.

"I mean... almost always you," I admitted.

That made her smile, but she pushed on. "Who else? If you remember."

Now it was my turn to blush, and on instinct I glanced at Cattie and immediately looked away, but the damage was done.

Cattie went a little red as she blushed so furiously even though she was grinning like a fiend. Cassidy just kept smiling at me with a twinkle in her eye. The others all started giggling again, teasing the three of us.

"When?" Cassidy asked.

"Once the weekend we first met at OmegaCon," I said. "We were so tired that night that we didn't, ah, make full use of the hotel room."

"You fucked me that next morning," Cassidy nodded, still smiling. "You were ravenous."

"What did you dream?" Cattie asked almost quiet enough to be a squeak.

"Well, mostly the feelings and stuff," I said.

"Come on, no visualization at all?" Terra asked for more.

"OK, I distinctly remember a flash of imagination of being in missionary, with one of your legs pulled back and leaning down to kiss," I said to Cattie.

"You should show us the position," Cassidy said. "So we can visualize it properly."

All of the other girls agreed, making both Cattie and I blush and look at each other. Finally she shrugged, a little nervous smile on her lips.

Chapter 177

Cattie and I got up on our knees. "Are we really-?" I asked.

"They won't stop until we do it," Cattie said with an eye roll but that little grin was still on her lips.

"Damn right, we won't!" Terra laughed.

Cattie moved to the centre of the group and got down on her back, spreading her legs. She was wearing simple cotton shorts and a t-shirt, so she wasn't exactly exposed in any way, though the legs of the shorts exposed most of her pale, smooth thighs. "Like this?" she asked.