All Comments on 'An Improbable Couple Ch. 01'

A cliffhanger! I love it.

When I got to the end of this first chapter I was disappointed that the site only allows for a five rating. Sorry I had to underate your story with only a five.

Chapter 2 is finished and at the editors. It is also the final chapter. I'll submit it as soon as I receive it. Thank you for reading my story and commenting.

DG Hear

I never rate a story that is not finished. There us a lot that can go into a second chapter but if she'd say'd yes I would have given it a five ;-)

A realy nice tale of budding love even with the stress of the baby. Looking forward to act two!

Great Job DG! 5 Big Blazing Stars for You my Friend. This story is right out of the HallMark channel, about love and life. I've been on the edge of my seat the whole time I've been reading it, waiting for the other shoe to drop. That Mary has fallen in love with some other guy and rips the heart out of our hero. or something to that effect. Maybe the old boyfriend comes back to reclaim her. Or she falls for some guy from school or some employee where she works for her Dad. I hope there is a happy ending! Great Writing, Great Story, Great Idea. Thanks DG for the effort. Great Job Buster2U

I truly enjoy reading your stories. You present the importance of values and you skillfully develop the romance between Dallas and Mary. I'm looking forward to the next part of their romance. K

Not much of a romance, more of an infatuation story. I hate cliffhangers. How can he ever be sure of her feelings, it feels like she is looking for something better? You have written many better stories.

Way better than the suck and fuck shit stories we read here. This story is the reason I follow DG Hear! Very well written for a score of 5 BIG ASS FUCKING HUGE FLAMING NOVA STARS! Thank you.

Nice start.

Great beginning!

5

I like a happy ending and hope that this doesn't turn out to be a heart breaker or some kind of a cuck fest.

Going to be interesting where you go with this. Dallas and Mary's whole interaction just seems weird to me. Especially Mary. She doesn't seem to really care that much for Dallas. I'd say she's keeping her options open looking to upgrade.

Maybe it's just meant to convey how young and inexperienced at life they are but, the interaction between Dallas and Mary seems very uneven and confusing. At points they're verbally expressing their love, then they're only spending one night together every two weeks and aren't sure if things will work out.

Mary claiming Dallas was only the third guy she's had sex with reminded me of the rule of 3 from the American Pie movies. Whatever number a woman says for sexual partners multiply it by 3. Especially since the first time they talked about it she was very specific that Dallas was only the 3rd guy she's had sex with in the past year. What about before that year?

Very nice. Great build up to them being a couple and parents. Looking forward to the next part.

Sort of forgone conclusion that Mary wants more stringing Tex out as a back-up, why? It is Mary's parents that have set the bar high over the years (requiring Mary to have a AA to get hired). The parents want more for there daughter that only a college degree husband, like Rick, can provide.

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At Olive Garden Mary will continue to play the undecided 'stall' but when pushed Mary says 'NO' (hoping to find her family's dream husband).

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Tex is a great guy with a very good future and solid-good income but unlikely to become a mover-&-shaker or money rich. This NO will humiliate Tex into leaving town for a four year Military tour that does offer him more/special machinist/engineer training. Tex meets a very special Military lady during his tour.

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Of course Mary's fantasy dream will blow up on her. Rick will refuse to raise a bastard, Angel, so Mary will take Tex to court for more-child-support and kill his already limited visitation. But Tex, as Angel's legal father, will not allow Angel to be taken out of the USA/State. Mary is boarding an out of CONUS flight (by Donna an airline Exec) and Tex gets sole custody of Angel as Mary lives her charmed life overseas. Kidnap attempts are thwarted by Mary's big brother Brad with Mary now having a warrant waiting at Customs for her USA entry.

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Part 2 shall be interesting.

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4****, Hooyah

This story must have been set in the 70’s or 80’s. For one, teenagers don’t much behave like this anymore. Other than the sex, of course. And also, a job that pays well and has insurance and retirement benefits barely exists these days, and is near impossible to find. Unless it’s union, then its more who you know than anything. You could be half retarded in some unions as long as someone vouches for you.

An honest guy doing the best he can..

5*

Hate cliffhangers!