by kevin_88
i'll give you a spoiler. 35 chapters and it ends in the middle of a story, NO ENDING, just leaves you hanging. decide if you want to spend that much time to just stop in the middle of a story.
Interesting and fun. Having read most of this series Randy is a loser and cuckold. Ridiculous situations and many bad decisions ruin this once promising story
Sharing their love.
Giving each other everything.
Now what is next ?
You stole this off my blog on YouNow, you better not be frofiting off my life stories.
Not bad but this sounded more like a generic porn script than a first time between 2 people with no experience at the end.
did you notice Nivek is kevin spelled backwards.? Maybe he posted it on 2 sites. Doesn't mean it was stolen
you guys are a bunch of retards if you focus on the xbox and game. good story by the way
I like the story so far... you're not gay for the x-box 360, just the lame game;}
One of the best stories I have read! Now I am off to read the rest! <3
I skipped to the end of this story immediately to tell you you're gay for having an X-Box 360, he's 19, not 9. Anyways, back to the story.
Twins are in tune with each others in a lot ways that other would never believe ..... looking for the next one!!!
For your first story, I think you did a good job. I'll keep my eye out for chapter 2.
Brother and sister only going out with each other. Neither one having dated much yet they each are very knowledgeable and proficient in oral sex and also how to totally satisfy each other. Not that realistic. Good story line. Think logically, even fanticies should build slowly. Keep writing.