Andrea, From Homeless to Happy

Pink Orchid 2022 Challenge

*

This story begins on November 15, 2000, in Lincoln, Nebraska. Many thanks to Sister Jezabel for fitting me into her busy schedule and showing me the sentences that would have gotten my story rejected, as well as a name problem I created.

The central storyline is the story of Andy, whose life is turned upside by death and betrayal, and as she matures and falls in love, she emerges from the firestorm of her life, stronger, wiser, and confident she will survive. Reading this story may make some people uncomfortable because violence is implied against women and teenagers as the main characters tell their stories about what brought them to a vacant house in Lincoln, Nebraska. Woven around their journey to safety are the bonds homeless people form, their daily fight to survive, and the gradual love stories that unfold, one between a young man and a young woman and the second between two women many years apart in age.

*****

Wandering down a two-lane road, clutching my two-month-old baby girl under my coat, I crossed the street and walked through tall weeds in a field until I came to a creek. The stream, partially frozen, was bridged by a homemade sheet of plywood laid over three two by fours, leading to a path that ended at an abandoned wood-frame house. Walking around to the back of the house, I knocked three times on the cellar door. A minute later, I pounded harder with my fist, and this time I heard someone coming. There was a scraping noise, and one of the doors opened up to let me in. After I was inside, a spade handle was pushed back through the inside handles to lock the door.

The girl who let us in reached out to take my baby from me. "Come to Sissy, Abby. Oh, what a pretty smile. Yes, it is. Is baby Abby hungry?" Sissy took her from my arms and headed upstairs to the living area. "I'll feed her for you, Andy. We scored some bent soup cans from Walmart's dumpster and the soup's on the stove. Get something to eat and get warm."

I walked into the kitchen and emptied my pockets on an old table against the wall.

"Wow, what a score." That voice came from a skinny red-haired boy walking toward me, followed by a little boy holding a toy car. The teen, whose name was Mark, spoke again, "Danni, come count this."

Danni was about forty, and Sissy and Alex, ages nineteen and eight, were her children. She treated Mark, Abby, and me as if we were also her kids. We were a family of homeless people who had an abandoned house as a home. She didn't talk much and hardly ever smiled. Mark had told me that he was living here when Danni and her children showed up one day last May.

Danni pulled a jar from under the sink, dumped the money inside on the table, and began counting both piles.

Pouring some soup into a bowl from a pot on the stove, I ate quickly, the soup's warmth countering some of the chills in the air. After getting seconds, I rinsed the bowl out in the sink, where we had running water from a well that was still hooked up to an electric source somewhere. I turned to watch Sissy breastfeeding my darling baby girl, and my mind took me back a month, remembering how I got here.

*

When Danni found Abby and me shivering in a Walmart dumpster surrounded by broken-down cardboard boxes, I let her guide us down a street to an old abandoned house across a creek. She led us in through the basement door and up some steps to a warm kitchen, where I met everyone that lived there. She nervously introduced me to her daughter last, and as Sissy approached me, I thought she was pregnant and due any day.

"Sissy, this is Andy and her darling little girl Abby. She may be the answer to our prayers."

Danni turned to me, saying, "Andy, Sissy isn't pregnant anymore because she had a stillbirth two days ago, and her breasts are painfully swollen, full of milk. She has been lactating a large volume of breast milk. How old is Abby, Andy?"

I was rocking Abby in my arms, trying to quiet her down because she was still hungry even though she drained my breasts earlier.

"Um, she's a month old, and I'm still not making enough milk every day."

"Can we see if Sissy can feed her, please?"

Danni was pleading with tears in her eyes, so even though I was nervous when I handed Abby to Sissy, my baby needed milk I couldn't provide her. When she latched onto Sissy's stiff nipple, I breathed a sigh of relief and relaxed, thinking my life was finally looking up a little.

*

My daydream ended, and when I looked back at Danni, she had all the money separated by denomination and was silently totaling all of the money. Seeing the money on the table and knowing what I did to get that money today caused the waterworks in my eyes to begin pouring out tears.

Danni looked at me and spoke, which was unusual for her, "Andy, you made $286.42 today, and that gives us a total of $587.45. We can get coats for you and Sissy, and Sissy's oversized coat can go to Mark." She was smiling, something she rarely did because we finally had something good happen to us. Maybe we could survive the cold Nebraska winter.

"More importantly, we can buy cold weather sleeping bags and pads, so we don't have to feed a fire all night. We can buy socks and gloves and hats. You hit the jackpot today, Andy." Her tiny smile changed to a big grin as she spoke, but her expression changed from happy to sad when I started sniffing, then sobbing, and finally bawling.

Danni froze with a shocked look on her face but didn't reach out to comfort me.

Mark did, and he hugged me, "Andy, what's wrong? Hey, don't cry."

I cried harder, and the tears were like a river running over my cheeks. I was shaking in Mark's arms because what happened to me today was too similar to what happened to me last New Year's Eve.

Mark was rubbing my back as he asked, "Andy, does the money you brought home have something to do with you being upset?"

I nodded several times and began blubbering, "Twoooo m-m-m-men wanted me to go with them. I t-t-t-told them I cccouldn't leave with them because of my baaaa-by. I peeled the blanket back to show them Abby so they would leave me alone."

I was crying harder and having trouble talking. Sissy came over and wrapped her arms around Mark and me and whispered in my ear, "Andy, Abby's full, burped, dry, and down for a nap, and Alex is watching her."

She started rubbing my arm and murmuring, trying to bring some comfort to me. "It's okay, Andy; we're doing all right. Don't cry, Andy."

Suddenly, Danni started mumbling out loud, "Stop. Get out of my head; I can't take this." I lifted my head off Mark's shoulder to see Danni take off for the stairs, crying. Mark pulled away from me and caught her before she could run away into the cold and lead her back to the stove.

Sissy pulled the four of us together, saying, "Let's get closer to the stove to have a group hug."

We closed ranks, with Sissy and Mark on either end, keeping Danni and me from running away. Mark hugged me tight to him with his left hand while holding Danni with his right. We stayed in this position for several minutes, but I couldn't stop crying.

Danni was staring at me when she broke the logjam and spoke first, with a comforting mom voice, "Andy, I'm sorry I scared you. I have my own demons that I need to talk about also. Please, tell me what happened? Did those men hurt you or try to drag you away?"

I was shaking and crying louder but did manage to nod once. Danni moved toward me, and with her tears dribbling from her eyes, wrapped her arms around my neck and spoke softly to me, "Andy, take your time and tell us what happened. If someone hurts one of us, we all are injured."

"Wwwhhwen I showed them, my baby, they said, they said they'd pa...pay me $100 to take off my, my blouse and let them watch me feed her." The sobbing and shaking started again. Finally, just as I got some control back, Danni asked, "So you said yes?"

"No!" And the tears exploded from my eyes, and I wailed. Finally, I forced myself to breathe so I could continue.

"I said $200. I feel like a who...."

Danni snapped and pulled me to her bosom, putting her hand over my mouth and rubbing my head. "Don't you say it, don't even think it! You're not." She kissed my forehead and hugged me. "You're not, not, not a whore."

"Deep breaths, that's right. Tell us the rest, and you'll feel better." She kissed me on the forehead.

I nodded, took a deep breath, and continued, "The men led me to the downstairs bathroom in Kohls, and they locked the door behind us. That's when I told them to give me the money and then stand against the sinks. They paid, so I hid the money in Abby's bag, laid my coat on the floor, and placed Abby on top. I wasn't scared or embarrassed; I just wanted extra money for the family. Then I took off everything above my waist, laid everything on my coat, and picked her up.

Sissy fed her before we left, so my nipples were hard, and my breasts were full of milk. I sat on a toilet seat and fed her from the left tit first, then moved her to the right side. That's when they started creeping closer, and when they reached for me, I screamed, and a few seconds later, I screamed a second time.

Someone was banging on the door, threatening to call the police, and the two men got scared and moved away, arguing with each other. I laid Abby down and quickly got dressed before picking Abby back up, just as they unlocked the door and ran out, knocking down whoever was outside the door. I waited a few minutes and snuck out."

"I wasn't afraid for myself; I was scared for Abby, and I was so ashamed."

Danni looked me in my eyes, kissed my forehead again, and started talking to me, "Andy, you have nothing to be ashamed of; you're just trying to survive."

Then Danni addressed all of us. "I screamed because pictures popped into my head, from my not-so-distant past, ugly pictures. Sissy knows what they are, Andy, so you're not alone. Someday I'll share my story with you, but for now, let's fix dinner and go to sleep. Now we can go shopping tomorrow and raise our standard of living!"

Mark spoke now, "We all have a story, Andy, and you happen to have two stories, today's story about being homeless and at the mercy of evil people and another story about what brought you and Abby here. I have a story that brought me here, and I know none of our stories are happy tales because happy Stories don't make you homeless."

Danni kissed me on the cheek, "You are the same age as my daughter, and your baby has two moms who share feeding her breastmilk. She was devastated to lose her baby, severely depressed, and God sent you and Abby to us, probably saving her life. She loves you like a sister and Abby like her own child, and you just now pulled me out of my funk and pity party. So we will survive this winter, and then maybe we can move south and try to be normal again."

Mark loaded some logs in the stove, and we all snuggled tightly together, pulling all the blankets we had over us, trying to stay warm.

*****

The next day was shopping day at Walmart, at least for Danni, Mark, and Sissy. I stayed at the house and rested with Abby and Alex. That afternoon they came back with three carts; the first one held two coats, lots of socks, boots for Mark, gloves for everyone, winter sleepers, and diapers for Abby. There were eighteen fire starter logs in the second cart to burn in the stove when we heated bathwater in buckets.

However, the most valuable purchases were in the third cart; three -20°F sleeping bags with pads and air mattresses. Some of the minor items they bought were a couple of high-intensity lanterns, several rolls of kite string, a roll of duct tape, three rolls of clear three-inch tape, and a good pair of scissors.

Danni looked pleased. "There's enough lite for a cardboard run, so Mark, take Andy and her new winter coat and gloves to Walmart. They had a nice pile of cardboard stacked on the ground out back."

I picked up the kite string and scissors while Mark pushed the shopping carts back to the store. He looked warmer in his slightly used coat. We came back with thirty cardboard logs. The logs were made by slicing cardboard sheets in 16" strips, rolling them up as tight as possible until they were 4-5" thick, and then tying off each end with kite string. By closing the damper halfway, they burned slower and didn't get as hot, but they would heat the newly insulated kitchen enough to keep us comfortable.

Mark was taking the carts back to Walmart; the people working in the back of the store didn't mind us borrowing carts because we always returned them. Sissy volunteered to go with him, and they left holding hands.

"How's the coat and gloves, Andy?"

"They are so warm." I hung my coat up and looked back at Danni. "Is there something going on between Mark and Sissy?"

"Yes." And she didn't say anything else, just smiled, and her eyes sparkled. This was the second time I'd seen her smile, and she reminded me of my mom. They were the same height and weight, but Danni's hair was blonde, and mom's hair was brown with hi-lights. I suspect Abby and I would not be alive had Danni not taken us in under her wing.

That night we had a feast of beef stew. We made one double bed by joining two bags together and putting it on top of two pads and one large air mattress. The third bed was a single-bag setup.

Danni took charge of sleeping assignments. "Well, since I'm the oldest, I'll be the mom here and make the bed assignments. So, Mark and Sissy take the single bag, and Andy, Alex, Abby, and I will sleep in the double."

I started to ask why I didn't get a single bag with Abby, but I was so warm lying next to Danni. I passed out and slept until about 3 o'clock when Abby needed changing. The fire was almost out, so I put more logs in the stove before changing her diaper. I snuggled back in the sleeping bag and fed Abby until she was satisfied, and then I burped her. I laid her down to my left in the sleeping bag and laid on that side facing her. I was a little shocked when Danni pressed her body against my back and put her arm around me, but that gesture made me feel safe, and I fell back asleep quickly.

*****

After a good night's sleep and a hearty breakfast of cereal and evaporated milk, I told Danni I wanted to panhandle in the city with Alex. He is a sweet child, never complains, and can play any role I give him. If I need him to be sick, he can create a cough that sends chills up your back. To look hungry, he can go limp and cry like he hasn't eaten a week.

I bundled him up with long underwear, an extra sweatshirt, and his old coat, which was warmer than it looked. For myself, I dressed the same in layers and a thin jacket going on last. We went downtown, but the best doorways for stores were taken, and you didn't try to squeeze into someone else's space. Starting to tire out, I decided to check my last choice, a Security 1^st Bank, standing alone between Northwoods Drive and 84^th Ave.

We stood in front of the bank, but the guard chased us away after ten minutes. We went around the corner from the ATM and sat against the wall. I brought a bag with some Oreos with me, and I fed them to Alex as people went past us to the ATM. As they came back, two or three people out of every ten who went into the bank slipped me a bill. I thanked them and put the money in my pants pocket.

We were getting ready to leave when an older woman passed by us. She was driving a red Cadillac, and she wore an expensive coat over a lovely dress and had bright red gloss on her lips. Peeking around the corner, I watched for her, and when she walked out of the bank, I pulled Alex in my lap, rocking him and humming in his ear. I whispered, "Alex, Close your eyes and moan softly."

Ten seconds later, I heard, "Miss. MISS!"

"I'm sorry, we'll move. I got so tired and had to rest." Standing up, I set Alex on his feet, and we shuffled across the parking lot.

"Wait, I don't work for the bank. You look hungry. Can I buy you some food?"

"We eat pretty good out of dumpsters; people throw out a lot of good food. We're cold all the time, and our coats are old, but we have a bed to sleep in and a roof to keep his dry at the shelter where my sister is staking out our beds."

"Is this cute boy related to you? He looks like he is freezing."

"He's my little brother. My baby girl is with mom while I try to get enough money to buy some warm coats."

"A baby girl? My, my, so young and so pretty to already have a baby. Well, let me help you get coats, on one condition. Come back here next Friday wearing the coats, and I'll buy you dinner. I always go to the bank after 3:30 every Friday, so if you humor me by returning here, I'll know you're safe and warm. Here is $80.00, and you should have enough to get gloves and a new hat also."

"Oh, you're too kind. We'll be here next Friday before 4:00 in our warm new coats. I don't want you to think we are scamming you." I waved goodbye and headed south in the opposite direction we needed to go. I looked back over my shoulder, and she was still staring at us.

She seemed like a nice lady, but the way she stared at us creeped me out. I've learned the hard way that trust is not something homeless people have a lot of. Her car passed by, and we waved. After she disappeared from our sight, we reversed our path and headed north.

The sun was creeping down by the time we got back to the house. We stood next to the stove, and I helped Alex unbundle from the extra layers he was wearing. I went to the counting table and pulled bills from the coat pockets, about $40.

Sissy looked at the haul, "Tough day, Andy?"

I hung our old coats in the living room and returned through the hanging partitions made into a doorway. Mark made it out of old hotel curtains he found in the dumpster behind the Holiday Inn last summer, and Sissy and Danni helped him hang them over the opening between the kitchen and the living room. Now there was no draft coming from that side of the house, and the kitchen felt warmer.

I stopped by the table and pulled money out of my pants pockets. When Danni counted the money, $172 more went into the jar, added to the $18 remaining from the Walmart shopping spree. I explained how most of it came from the lady at the bank. It was dark outside, and I noticed that all the windows had cardboard taped across them, and cardboard sheets covered the wood floor, keeping cold air from filtering up from the basement. The kitchen felt so much warmer.

"Sissy, you and Mark were busy today."

"Danni watched Abby, and we went back and forth all day. Walmart threw out a lot of boxes last night. There is a huge pile in the old bedroom."

Danni spoke to the three of us, "Cardboard is very flammable, so we need to be careful with the stove."

Even with that warning, we all had smiles on our faces for once. We ate dinner and slept very well again. That night, Danni took Abby and laid her between Alex and herself. She didn't wait for confusion to set in before telling me, "Snuggle up against my back, like I did last night." So I did.

*****

Saturday was here, which was bath day. We had some throwaway towels from hotels, bars of soap we bought, and an oversized clawfoot tub that we dragged from the bathroom and was now just outside the kitchen in the living room. We put two fire logs in the stove, opened the damper, and put two buckets filled with water on top of the stove. When there was enough hot water in the tub, Danni washed Alex first before shampooing his hair. Then, it was Mark's turn, and Sissy scrubbed him up before rinsing him off.

I watched them while feeding my happy little girl. When Sissy was drying Mark, I laid Abby down on our sleeping bag to play. Pulling the drain plug, all the bathwater drained down a short piece of pipe, through a hole in the floor, into a crawlspace that drained to the front side of the house. After I wiped the tub down, I started the hot water process a second time by heating more water on the stove.