All Comments on 'Animal Lover Ch. 12'

Thank you so much for taking us on this journey while i am sorry to see it end i did enjoy the adventure of getting here.

Thank you for posting this story and i look forward to your next story

what a nice ending to a nice story. hope to read more like this in the future =)

that was a good ending. loved the story.

oh how i love your stories. hopefully there is many more to come.

What a great story.. I am sad that it had to come to an end. I just love the characters in this story. do consider doing a sequel to this story... maybe with Jo finding her mate... or will Lyssa and Em ever have kids. i do wait until your next story

I absolutely loved and Hope you write another story soon.

gud really gud]

u know u could have ended with lyssa having few kids............

I really enjoyed this story and also hope you write another soon. I'd love it if you did a follow up at some point or even better maybe you could do Randall's story since he has to find a mate.

The only thing I felt was missing was them determining where she ranked in the pack. I know you did say she was above Thomas (yea!) and some of the others but it would have been interesting to see how they determine where you rank and if she was a beta like Emmett.

Thanks for the story! I like how you followed through with all the details in the end like Ronnie and the reparations Emmett made.

It was so funny when she was yelling her telepathic messages. Esp. when she yelled about Emmett not wanting her. I thought it was really sweet the way he 'went on a hunt' for her necklace and that was when she agreed to be his mate. Overall, well done!

You have done a fantastic job w/your first series on Lit. It has been really fun to read your story. I hope this is the first of more to come. I wish you much continued success w/your writing career. And "Thank You" again for sharing your story, it really has been fun reading.

this story cant wait for the next chapter

You did great with your first story! It felt like a bit of an abrupt ending, but i loved the topic you ended with..but maybe a small prologue paragraph of the birth of their family would have felt more finished.

All in all one of my fav stories tho. looking forward to a lot more of your writing I agree with a previous poster, why not write randall's story!

What a lovely way to finish although being a bit greedy would have loved just one more page, with her having the two cubs he dreamed about but I am content to leave it there. Well done.

I liked the story, but I do have a few issues with it:

You keep going back between first and third person and that can make it a little tricky to read. You should try and find an editor to help you with that.

My other issue is that you tend to move very quickly through the plot, summarizing in several places.

Other than that, it's a great story and I can't wait for your next one.

Ashira

hope to see more on this bunch( and i like the humour in the story)

I personally liked the bit about the tattoos.

I've thoroughly enjoyed reading this story. Can't wait to see what else you come up with!

Is there a sequel in the works? Can't wait!

I totally enjoyed this series... Great job.... Please keep it coming!!!

ohh this can't be the end

all i can say is sequel sequel sequel i want a sequel!!!!!

*pulling myself off the floor......

*refilling wasted wine glass

Fell on the floor off my chair.... way too funny ending!

This story was so realistic.. It wasn't a fine a wolf loves me and i love him too and happily ever after... there was real struggle, real acceptance, real life (even though it is make believe)

wonderful.

not to say it wasn't a good story but it seemed to rushed or something..it was missing something..it had the potential to be really good..good plot an such..maybe a bit more detail an less jumping from one pov to another..still very good dispite these lil annoyances..^-^

You have a great talent for writing...just a little bit rushed, but still an excellent story!!!! Please write more stories, as I will read them all up...LOL!!!

This one really made me giggle. And holds great potential for a series randalls story? And maybe Thomas's aswell then Joanna's ? Keep up the entertainment !

You need to Give US MORE!!

Seriously could have died laughing at "[THEN WHY WOULDN'T HE HAVE SEX WITH ME?]"

I honestly love this books, your writing style is sometimes hard to follow as you switch from one person to another but keeps me on my toes.

This was the best one yet!!! There have to be more!!! Your writing style is the best and I cant wait for the next instalment.

loved it read it all in one go and still wanted more!

this really needs to go longer with them havin pups and enemies

I truly enjoyed this series. I read it completely through before i posted. You should continue this story. Or add a different prospective maybe another couple meeting. Would be interesting if you hooked Jo with someone. Maybe from the Macy pack. He could smell her when they came to negotiate the retribution of the illegal hunting???? It would be hilarious to see the reaction of The Alphas, and Uncle Emmett to say the least.

I am like others the writing style is new and take a second to get use to but it flows well and the different outlooks add to the overall effect.

a very good story but I nearly packed it in after 2 chapters as i found the costant changing oy tense and perspective very difficult to read.

I read it all today. I couldn't stop. I look forward to reading many more of your

submissions. Thank You.

If u add another point if view to the story can it be joannas she is my favorite supporting character and she goes to school maybe she meets a guys:)

First I like to say that you are very good and you can continue the story by having Lyssa have pups and enemies but it is the best story love how it started and finish lets hope it no the end of the story. The best story ever thanks for the read

I loved the series. Hate to admit it but fell in love with Emmett. It was a few mistake, yet the story line so great that I was lost and over looked them. Keep up the good work. :)

Found the story 2day n finished it reading all day long.thanx 4 such a sweet story.bt gaps were needed between 2 paragraphs,coz it was hard 2 catchup while u were changing place n conversatn.

It would hav been gr8 if u considered showing their cubs n also jo's mating with a hot n sweet guy!

2 xams left,then will b free 2 read all ur submisions.w8ing 4 that... :)

I Really loved this story.

Thank You

Good story line and characters.

Although, writing is too much like reading a script.

Need to work on phrasing to sound like reading a book.

Otherwise, OK start and will be waiting for more.

LadyTiger

That was without a doubt one of the best series I've read so far! Keep on writing amazing stories.

That was great!!! I just read and finished it today!!!

Oh my gosh i loved this so much its just needing to be longer and in book form

Good story! I liked that you put Fin at the end, because it is sometimes at the end of a piece of music. It would usually be above the staff, but it is sometimes below it. Now, on to the next story!

Now I would like to congratulate you on what a fine job you did withe this story!!!

I hope that all your stories are this good! 'cause I'm gonna read 'em all!!!

This is the first story I ever read on werewolves and it managed to shock me, to seduce me and to make me love the hierarchy, the domination and protectiveness of the higer ranked wolves, but especially that inner part, the inner wolf, well, it just makes sense. We have intuition and we tend to ignore it. Thank you so much!

The best part about this story (imo) is that the character's personalities are very well defined. What I mean by that is your characters have a definite set of personality traits and rarely act out-of-character. The other thing I really liked about this story is you elicited the emotional responses you were looking for from your readers (happy, sad, etc). I'm not gonna lie - you got a few tears out of me.

The last thing I want to touch on here is the S-E-X. I enjoyed the fact that you touched on both perspectives in regards to both giving and receiving. I liked that while a scene was happening, the perspective would shift making it all inclusive. Warning: A lot of readers will find this confusing, so you should do something to mark the transition between perspectives.

As for the things I thought you didn't do well, one is heavily opinion driven so you can ignore it, but the other two are pretty much deal-breakers no matter what.

Opinion: The plot-line you used to write this story is used so often that it has become a cliche. Weak human female saved by large were male only to have something ridiculous get in the way of their love is getting old. You further exasperated this by adding in the female lead who wasn't ready for everything her new life entailed, so she staunchly refused said male. The whole "female with a column of steel for a spine who doesn't think she needs saving but actually does" is - stale. There are dozens of ways to add conflict without resorting to this formula.

Biggest problem (in my mind): At times your story reads like a published novel, and at times it reads like a time-line or event calendar. What I mean by this is you rattle of a list of events in rapid succession with nothing to tie it all together. Plot is a framework within which you build your world and should never shine through. Think of plot like a skeleton - you need it to support you, but if you ever see it directly, something is awfully wrong. The best way to hide the plot from direct view is to flesh out the story more. Character interaction, dialog, introspection etc.. Make us care more about your characters so we care more about the story/plot.

Second problem: Grammar - tense specifically. Most people are not used to hearing about things in present tense. television programs, news papers, social media and the radio almost always present their information after the fact. past-tense 3rd person perspective is probably the way you receive most of your information. (In most cases, the verbs will end w/ an 'ed'.) Now if you wanted to write the entire thing in present tense, it would make your story unique, but it might also turn some readers off. I've only ever read one story written in the present tense on here, (it scored like a 4.8) but someone actually wrote in the comment section "Present tense - unreadable."

Well, that's about it. On average, I would probably give this story a 4 - mainly because of the cliched plot formula. With a bit of work, you could probably publish this as a stand-alone novel.

Almost did not read this story, when I checked submissions list. I thought will check first chapter, if no good will go to some other story. Read six chapters, started seventh, duty called(laundry). Finally finished chapter seven, duty called(laundry and dishes). Took a long break and finished the rest of story. Well written, not many typo errors. Will check the rest of your stories on you submission list. Really enjoyed how Emmett made contact with Lyssa, and all the trials they both went thru. Enjoyed this story very much, keep writing like this and you will receive many comments. Thank you for making my day better................

I've been reading for several hours. When I started this I was skeptical of the Sci-Fi and Non-Human categories, but this is pretty awesome. Once I began to read, I couldn"t put it down. Much detail was included in the story, but not so much as to become tiresome. I love your ending with her in Estrus. This is the ultimate and possibly last stage to her full incorporation into the life of the pack. I do wish you had placed somewhere towards the end what her rank became after being mated and marked by Emmet as Beta. Especially after she made several important improvements to their business. Or will she always be an Omega and considered almost an outsider. But good story!

I didn't expect to finish it today but didn't want to leave it until I was done, some minor errors in spelling and grammar but good overall. It was a well thought out story. I am glad I came across it, and even more glad that it was not one of the many unfinished stories on here.

I am so happy that I read your story! It was very good. I'm also glad that it was finished.

I really liked your chars and the story!!

A few minor spelling errors, but overall a really good read.

I'm totally gonna check out more of your stories!

I absolutely loved this love story.

Great story. I'm more of a vampire story person but every once in awhile I find a good wolf story. VERY well written and the story flow was excellent.

And this made me laugh out loud:

[THEN WHY WOULDN'T HE HAVE SEX WITH ME?]

Natalie shoots Anna a look. "I'll get her to the bunker. Will you bring some food?"

"Sure. Meet you there."

Emmett winces and several males chuckle at her last broadcast.

Love Lyssa's smart and sassy personality - Emmett did choose well.

luv2read2

Emmett and Lyssa finally have everything that they wanted. Its a little hard to believe that Lyssa can just disappear though. I love the ending. She was a bit scandalized with how Anna and her mate were having sex in public. Now its her turn to do the same thing.

Omg this story made me so happy. Ive been looking for something like this. I wish it was longer, but its still awesome. Good job.

I though this story was amazing :) would be perfect for a sequel???

Very nice ending to a great story

This story was fantastic! I too wish it were longer, but was happy none the less. With a proper editor, this could be turned into a paperback?? All you need is to add a bit more here and there to fill it out some. I would love to re read it in novel form!! Think about it.

this was an incredible series, it was great to read. thank you so much for making it!!!

Thank you KemMyst

I've read a series in a similar vein, there is something so pure about the good relationships, it's just a shame they have to go through all the shit first. I guess it wouldn't be such a long story, but it would be interesting to see how if Ronnie had just gone when told, how things would have been done differently.

Will definitely be reading the rest. I only came looking for sex and now look what I have to do.

Anyone that has got this far and enjoyed this story, I thoroughly recommend looking up Stray by Rachel Vincent, the 1st in her Shifters series.

LOVED this whole series. Is a whole complete story. The nuances are rich with imagery. The emptions are sharp and clear. THANK YOU !!! Keep writing you are distinctly talented.

The story is great. The only thing i would like to point out is the transition between view points was a little hard to follow at times. You had Emmett describing something and the next paragraph was from Lyssa's point of view.

Overall it’s a great story, it has some issues but I think they’ve all been mentioned before; switching perspective from one person to another without any visible marker and the definition of “no harm to females” is really messed up. No harm between wolves, well the medic/ doctor was unconcerned about physical injuries because wolves heal quickly they had to keep reminding him that she was human. He tried to rape her but they were still going to hand her over to her rapist? Even after she told them she wasn’t willing. It makes the “no harm to females” into a mockery. I think that annoyed a lot of readers, myself included. The other thing I noticed was that you went rapidly from detailed scenes to what might as well have been bullet point updates.

Thanks for sharing Tess (uk)

I think this is a great story. I only came in to it at chapter 6, but I felt that was the shifting point and just read to here... the end.

No problem with your writing at all. You intersperse your phrases with an interesting vocabulary that usually isn't used in 'plebian' works. Nice! Nice development of lusty scenarios too.... not pornographic, just lustfully interesting. Your continuity of your characters is good too... you don't drop them or change them as the story progresses. It took me a couple of reads, but I learned to like your dual conversation [mindful] "...........................[words]" way of communicating that two characters were conversing alternately.

As for the comment below (anonymous critic) about Lyssa being almost raped and then turned over to her rapist.... I think that added a flavour of "The law of the Pack' (Kipling style) to the theme.

Well done.

Really good fun and held my attention throughout, thank you.

Absolutely loved it! Great ending to the story.

Had a few laughs as Lyssa was adjusting to her transformation.

Totally enjoy reading this story over and over again, wonderful story. Loved the humor this story shows with the characters, especially the ending! Lol

Fantastic.... Need more...