All Comments on 'AU Ch. 04'

The chemistry in this story is so hectic, its almost tangible. They are just made for each other. The way you wrote it, their feelings just jump out at you and that is why i rated each of your chapters highly. Its rare to see something like that. The dynamics between their relationship is also something wonderful. I like that even tho Mark is younger and smaller than Mad, he wants to take care of him and lead. Maddox, being as big as he is, is just so cute in his uncertainty. I'd definatly loving this story.

Fangs you're amazing, I love your writing and can't wait for more! Please post whatever you have finished so I don't go through withdrawal!

But if you are going to make Maddow believe he is the father of Trista's baby after he told Mark she was cheating on him, that will not be cool.

BTW, LOOSE= not tight, LOSE= misplace something.

I wonder if you have ever considered somebody proof-read your draft... The story is excellent, but somebody who knows the syntax should proof-read yours. JMHS....

I am a nervous wreck, waiting for the rest of this! You definitely have me hooked!

I love this story so much, as a black woman I understand the extent homophobes will go. I am sure my nephew is gay,I had to hold back my anger and tears when he told me it was wrong to be gay,(poor sods got a religious mother and Asian dad) he smiled when i told him different.

So glad that you are continuing the story!! I'm kind of leaning toward finishing this story before starting on the next. I’m so invested in these characters and 1) I don’t want to be juggling multiple story threads (because I’m definitely going to be reading anything you post) and 2) any time you spend on writing the other story is taking away from the time you could be writing THIS story, lol. Just my opinion tho’. Great job and can’t wait for Chapter 5!

Thank you everyone for the feedback! I dealt with a lot of homophobia in highschool and so it ends up in a lot of my stories. Chapter 5 is with a new editor. I noticed a few errors myself after I posted and that is saying something since we all know my grammer is terrible. My other story is pending approval and is with yet another editor so please let me know what you think. Sorry this took so long to get out. It was finished sometime in December but the holidays had everyone busy. I hope you all like the way this one ends and I will try not to keep you all waiting as long. Thank you again for reading.

I think this was a great chapter. you really began to develop the characters for us. I can't believe this freakin pregnancy thing. gosh, how will they stay together through that? Their relationship is pretty new to deal. I also think Mark is so damaged, and I hope he can work through some of it by opening up to Maddox. He's dealt with so much on his own. I am not sure what the last sentence was saying. what about a plane? i really hate you leaving us hangin!! :) I am excited about your doing a werewolf/vamp story as it's a fav of mine.

Can't wait to read the rest. I think u should post the vampire/werewolf story now too. I can follow both stories at once! :)

I forgot to tell you but you write awesome! (:

You have a gift for peeling back the layers of your characters, their emotions and their backgrounds at an intuitive pace that tantalises one to the verge of insanity. Always trust in that instinctive ability of yours. Anyone can learn how to spell perfectly or master the rules of grammar - and it is important to do so - but very few know how to tap into their creativity and shape it into something so entertaining people can't wait to see what they share next.

Now would be a good time to mention that I simply can't wait to see what comes next...

This chapter's wonderful pace carried us through varying elements of Mark and Maddox's world and gave us a fuller view of the life they lead. The more you reveal, the more I want to know. About Noah, Mark's scars, the renewal of Triss and Madd's shaky friendship, the pregnancy, Mark and Madd dating in secret, Todd and Just, Cass' knowledge of the secret relationship... See why I'm on the verge of insanity?

Loving this world. Well done :)

Blessings,

AH

I would so totally buy this book! I've been hooked since the first installment. It's 5+ stars!