by Cutiecat
The leftovers ? That guy is an a sshole and someone needs to learn about vaginas. Also I laughed so hard with the description of the duck or the way you call people "the horny man" "the virgin". It didn't make sense but it was funny
Thanks for the story. I didn't like it to be honest. It's not because your main protagonist is a complete A-hole, because you can still weave a hot story around that.
Lucky thing I didn't blink during the reading of this. I might have missed all the action.
Your story lasted about as long as his making her a woman.
Perhaps a little more development?
By all accounts he raped her, all he thought about was his dick.
Keep it up. Your story has good character for her being a virgin but there is no development leading g up to the finale. There is also no character or plot. You story is rushed and seems a bit forced. Continue writing and let it flow more.
no character development - no backstory - no plot other than wham bam, thank you mam
Keep trying... lacks character development, moves too fast and needs more believability.