Becoming Raven, Forevermore Pt. 03

I have one week to be more adventurous. If my life sucks now, surely the punishment must be worse. That's what's driving me today. The fear that somehow this can and will get worse. But everytime I think "Today's the day". I recoil. I jump back. No it can't be worse. I'd rather be punished than give up my last shred of masculinity.

Emma finally contacts me with a text message. I've really missed her the last couple of days. "I'll be there soon. We need to get you sorted." The best response I can muster up is "Okay". She's been a lot more forthcoming with me lately. I think she's getting tired of seeing her former captors face. In fact the sheepish Emma that I knew at the beginning is starting to become a memory. She's becoming drunk in her independence to do things. She's had her share of one night stands and coffee dates, meanwhile I've been eating takeout and watching porn.

She got here quicker than I thought. I quickly hid the vibrator and dildo as I've become accustomed to doing. Waltzing in with a spare key I had made for her, she sits down at my desk and immediately begins typing.

"Erm Hi?" I stand almost flabbergasted at this event. I look over her shoulder and see what she's doing. She's literally checking my internet history. I try to move to stop her but she can already see. "What the fuck?!" I shout at her.

With a look similar to what Jane had for me, she stares daggers back. "Look Ray. I'm not the one who's visited 7 videos today. I'm not the one who's going to get the biggest magical 'fuck you' in a week. You are. Have you even tried looking for some creepy virgin to get it over and done with?"

"What?" Emma's new found attitude threw me. "How d- How would-"

She rolled her eyes. "Same way you got tricked. Tinder. Match. Bar. Drink. Done." She said it so matter of fact, so devoid of anything else. Like a simple work task a manager instructed must be done. No room for compromise. She must have seen me taken aback. She regressed to her more caring demeanour. "Look Ray, I know who she was. I know what she's capable of. I've tried being patient with you but if you do nothing it's going to get worse. Much worse." Her arm was caressing my back, her gentle touch trying to remind me the world wasn't awful.

"How about you let me handle it, it's the least I could do for you. I could get something set up asap. Something quick and easy, a loser who will be there for 2-3 minutes tops and then gone. You wouldn't have to deal with the situation any longer than you need to."

She wasn't exactly convincing but I knew she was right. I awkwardly nodded my head. She clapped her hands, removing the tension in the air. "Okay, let's get you something sorted." With a dominant hand she snatched my phone and got to work. I couldn't see what she was doing but it was clear she was messaging a handful of pre-existing matches as well as using her own phone sniffing around for any desperate guys who needed a release.

I paced around the flat, sickeningly anxious, part of me thought maybe I should pay attention the other part thought best to just leave it to Emma and play my part as and when needed. Either way I dreaded the result. Eventually I peeked back into the room, I had settled on cancelling it and went in with the intent on preventing Emma from doing any more damage. However my delay was my undoing. "Oh good. I've sorted it, we're gonna go out tonight, double date style." She was already picking clothes and pairing them with others.

"Erm Em maybe-" As if to stop me whining more. Emma immediately interjected.

"This will be good for you. Trust me. If you think life is bad now, it would have got much worse. Plus you're a straight girl now, you can't live a lie. Literally in your case."

"Try this on" she said, shoving a tighter showy dress into my hands. My mouth jar ready to speak, she turned around as if to deny any compromise.

I decided it might be best to do as she said, I began changing, removing the grey joggers and plain white tee.

As I looked over she had been rifling through various draws. Already laying down some risque lingerie. It was one of the few things I hadn't tried on, I knew that washing them was an alleged pain and I hadn't wanted to add additional trifles into my chaotic life.

I took off the yellow granny panties and start pulling up this lacy red set. As I looked towards Emma, I was startled to see the dildo I had been using earlier shoved into my face.

"Aren't you tired of using this? Don't you want to try the real thing?" It was prodding my cheek, I looked up to her with daggers in my eyes. "No I'd rather-"

The dildo wiped across my lips. "Enough with the pity parade. Your choice is to either sleep with the guy I've picked out or frantically strip and look at any homeless guy on the street at the 11th hour. At least my guy is clean, will have no prejudices and is happy to give you the time of day."

She was right but the blunt manner in which she said it whilst wiping my face with my own dildo was not helping her case.

"This could be huge for you. Worst case scenario it's a cheap, easy fuck. Best case scenario this could be like the guy you're meant to be with. Who you have kids with-"

"No way! Nuh uh. Not gonna happen. There's no way-" my protests quickly became muzzled from the dildo penetrating my lips and mouth.

"Listen Ray, I'm partially joking. Chances are this is no one. But you will eventually have to face this life on all levels. Do you want to have to dick down on random guys from now until you die or would you rather settle with one who, yes, will degrade and humiliate you during sex as per your kinky wishes, but when it ends will hug you and make you feel normal again."

I push Em away. A scowl followed by adamant refusal to entertain not only the notion but also the dildo in my mouth.

We spent the evening prepping, Em dressed up in this gorgeous mini skirt blouse combo and me in a Navy Blue dress to hide my weight. She spent the whole time just talking about future plans that I should consider. I didn't want to hear it. Before I was mentally prepared the time had come. Em pushed me downstairs to the Taxi picking us up.

The drive wasn't without issue. Em had shed all pretences of shyness and was talking about the two guys and how she liked to fuck. I caught the gaze of the driver multiple times in the rearview, no doubt he'd love to try it on with Em but she was almost coaching me on what to do. Fuck. Is she telling me to take the lead?! I didn't have more time to think about it. We were here.

Stepping out of the taxi, I looked around. The club seemed to be this up and coming spot, plenty of people were here. I awkwardly shimmied out. A few laughs and stares reminded me who I was. Em grabbed my hand and pulled us in line. I was surprised how quickly and easily we got it. I assume it was because the Bouncers were happy to let Em in.

Waltzing in, Em shows me the targets for the evening. Her match a stunning 6ft, muscle defined adonis, my match a younger weak looking nerdy looking boy. I had a small pang of stress, thinking how eerily similar this was to my life changing evening.

I snap back to reality to Em practically dragged me across the dancefloor.

"Hey guys, this is my friend Ray. Ray, this is Max and James." I attached their names to the respective faces. Max was definitely the object of quite a bit of attention. He was wearing this tight fitting black t-shirt. James however, was a short guy wearing... well a clean but unironed shirt. The irony wasn't lost on me.

Em and Max spearheaded the conversation all night. The two had great chemistry. Me and Max did not. Both of us had a reluctance to engage with this situation. My tattered shreds of masculinity didn't want to lose and he was most likely uninterested in losing his virginity to a girl like me.

After an hour Em grabs me by the hand. "Will you get drinks? We'll be right back." Pulling me all the way to the bathroom. She immediately turns to me. "Erm hello? What are you doing?" I was actually startled.

"If you don't start pulling your weight in this conversation you'll be going home alone tonight. Was that poor choice of words or was she intentionally being obtuse. Regardless, this dominant version of Emma was correct. I just didn't care. "Fine, whatever. It's your choice now. You can either do it my way or deal with what comes next alone. I'm not going to sit around and watch you cry about how things are so much worse when I tried to help." That stung. It was quite manipulative of Emma to cite withdrawal of support when I had no one else.

I stared down at my feet. "I'm sorry. I'll try harder." Emma came and hugged me once more. "Good, try and have a little faith in me and my plans okay?" Leaving the toilets we headed back to the boys. Em continued dancing and talking with Max, meanwhile I attempted to be more forthcoming with James. Trying to figure out what he did, what he liked. We settled on a conversation about a few games he'd been playing lately. Max and Em kept refreshing drinks for the table and it was surprisingly easy to feel myself getting drunker. I'd thought this body might be capable of lasting a fair while longer but it seemed that I was quite a lightweight. James himself was also pretty far gone.

Em leaned over and shouted to the two of us. "Hey, why don't you guys head back and play some games and we'll see you tomorrow." It seemed like a reasonable request. I asked James if we should go to my place or his, and he settled on mine. The taxi ride home was actually pleasant. Out of the club and away from the loud music, James seemed to have settled on a good rhythm for conversation. He spoke at length about how he wanted to get into game design and create games that everyone could enjoy.

I opened the door to my flat, letting James inside. I headed to the kitchen to grab a glass of water to lessen a potential hangover. I wasn't sure where James had wandered off to so I looked around the flat, heading to my room with the door open. James had taken the initiative. Lying in his boxers on my sheet, I froze. He was laid back massaging his cock underneath, no doubt getting it ready for what was next. Shit. Fuck. I thought I had more time, I thought Em said this guy wasn't exactly forthcoming either. Maybe it's not too late maybe I should-

He saw me looking at him from the doorway, he removed his boxers leaving him fully exposed. I felt something inside of me pulse. Like a heartbeat amplified across my body. I walked towards him, kneeling on the edge of the bed. Slowly but surely getting closer and closer. It was in front of my face. His hands moved away, one moving toward the side of my face gently guiding me even closer. It wasn't a giant, it wasn't small. It was, dare I say perfect?

I opened up, my mouth agape. I began carefully and slowly bobbing my head around the shaft, my tongue gently caressing the throbbing member. My right hand planted firmly on the bed to keep myself up, my left hand had wandered to my tit and was forcefully massaging it. My eagerness was alien, this wasn't what I wanted to do, but there was nothing stopping me from stopping and yet I couldn't.

I pushed up and down, gathering speed, my frizzy hair bouncing with each bob. I wanted more. More. In my gluttonous state I somehow pulled myself off, standing back up. I pulled and yanked at my dress, quickly removing it as fast as I could. My lacy panties followed soon after. I crawled forward, no idea whether I was being seductive but at the very least my display hadn't changed James' mind. In fact he had already suited his member up with a lubricated condom.

I positioned myself over him, holding his cock with my left hand. I began guiding it to my drooling pussy. Anticipation mounting as I lower myself slower and slower until- penetration. Ecstasy erupts; this is what my body needs. What I've needed. What I've been missing for the last three weeks, no, my entire life.

I bounced up and down in rhythm, my eyes fixed on the ceiling in lieu of a sky. I felt incredible, a warm sensation ran like waves from across my body, bottom to top on repeat. My moans of pleasure certainly not dulled by my prior reluctance. A cacophony of moans, heavy breathing and the sound of impact made for an orchestra of joy in my bedroom.

I tried going faster, if anything was ruining this magical moment it was my stupid weight making it harder. Like a White Knight sensing my distress, James pulled away and flipped me around. My face buried deep in the covers, my pussy high in the air and James, raised his sword and impaled. My god, I thought heaven could be no better than this, that this was the pinnacle of my existence and then it happened.

A large sharp pain across my arse, followed by an awkward phrase uttered by James. "Yeah, you like that don't you slut?". Despite a small quiver in his voice, a mere pretence of confidence, I loved it. The situation and enjoyment escalated by a factor of 10. In between harsh breaths I blurted out "Yes. God yes! More please!" That affirmation had a positive effect on him, he seemed to grow with confidence with each "yes" that I mustered. He slapped my arse once again. "God fuck yes, more."

His pace picked up, his left hand planted firmly on the back of my head to keep his balance, god it felt so sexy to have him forcibly keep me in position whilst he rhythmically pounded my wet pussy. His hand curled up into a ball, grabbing my hair slightly pulling it back along with my neck and face. "Beg me for it" he demanded, drunk on power.

"Please, fuck me more." "Not good enough" "PLEASE, I NEED YOUR DICK SO MUCH, PLEASE GIVE ME MORE." Like two beasts we came in unison. I could feel the condom inside me fill with his warm juices. My body slumped exhausted yet fulfilled. A moment of unparalleled ecstasy before my own guilt and pride brought me down to reality.

James took the condom off from his cock and moved his member in front of my face. Now that I was more rationally thinking it was harder to want to engage in this activity any longer but the smell was still somewhat intoxicating. Like a good slut, I licked and sucked his cock clean. He still reeling from the sense of power seemed to go a little further. He puts his hand on my rosy red cheeks. "Open wide". I hesitated but relented, his other hand holding the condom held it over my tongue allowing his jizz to fall down and coat it.

A salty sweat tasting ooze that I swirled around my mouth. The doubts of what I did, who I was and whether I could do this all seemed to fade away for that moment. I laid not wanting to swallow but just to savour. I hadn't noticed that James had got dressed and made way to leave until he gave me one last slap on the arse as thanks. I finally succumbed to swallowing my rewards before I drifted off to sleep.