All Comments on 'Betrayed'

Actually pretty darn good !

But reconciling with her after she reached adulthood means there should be no reason he ever needs to talk to her cheating, betraying mother again. Seems like a fair trade off to me.

Loved this story and Henry could be me.

Something on those lines happened to me, but I was able to take my sons from her when they hit 13. Funny, even children know when their mom is a cheating slut.

Already said by others, 5 stars.

a sad slice of life in today's world .. 5

pussy whipped bastard should have left.

The story of betray was good but personally I could never get past the betrayal. The 14 yr. old made a choice. I'm sorry I can't sympathise with her being young.I'm old and have been around the world 5 times, lived thru a war, a picnic and a family funeral where all the stops get pulled out. (I am of Irish extraction...we do grudge great) I have seen 14 yr. olds under stress make decisions a that would try the average American male. While it is not good to carry around anger and hate...he was able to move on and find some sort of peace. He was wronged and there is nothing wrong with loathing your enemies and the 3 of them deserved it. As for the 2nd wife...while the eyes cannot trespass she did snoop..and as far as I'm concerned betrayed him too. She was willing to risk losing him AND her daughter losing her de facto daughter just so she could set things "right"? She was and did. Perhaps with great sorrow I think he should have left again. He wasn't running away from anything except he was just trying to get betrayal out of his life. Wife # 2 instigated it while thinking he could do tyhe same to her daughter. Too bad for her. Life is hard. I think he should have remained true to himself. I lived this story. I have 2 sons but I don't. My life works better with out them in it (as well as their mother...the man has since, thanks be to god, died rather painfully and ultimately alone. it sure doesn't make me feel bad...about any of them. Fuck them! I have a loving relationship now with a woman who cannot betray me. There is a wall...of self protection. It took me a while but while other people may cause you grief and they can make you happy...ultimately we are our own source of happiness. We are all in this alone. Choose to be happy. Choices involve consequences. People fail you if you give away all yourself to them. I did that once. So it goes. I choose to be happy and live my life on my terms. Have done it for 72+ yrs It just doesn't matter to me who likes or loves me. I do. And I am the one I have to answer to.

All that said, it was a good story and I enjoyed it very much and applaud the author's efforts. For That....5*s

Why come to a sex site and post a sad life story??Should be in NON EROTIC.

BTB type...just saying...2BE

I guess that the protagonist lost his balls at the end of the story. Just plain crap 1.star

This has so many similarities to a story by the famed author you should owe him part copyright. Even down to the disappointing daughter .Crazy resemblances

The changes in POV are well managed, although realistically one might expect only one POV. I realise that would have been difficult. This was well told and gripped me until the end.

I have given 4 stars and favourited it as I guess this must actually reflect a scenario that is often repeated but not often enough told. Should he have acquiesced to Kelly's attempt at reconciliation with the daughter? Well I'm glad he did for the comfortable ending. He still took his chances to rip into Jennie and Tom afterwards!

Friends are the most dangerous people!

for the new Matt Moreau.

yea, pretty much everyone walked all over the poor asshole, but that's just fine.

sorry author - this one stinks.

Keep up the good work.

This is not a Matt M. story. Our hero moved on, somewhat. He got screwed by the x-wife, and his best friend. His daughter was just collateral damage. His actions were not fair to his daughter, but she made her choices as did everyone else. He was fortunate to find another woman and child who loved him. He was also fortunate that the 2nd wife loved him enough to risk their relationship, by bringing the daughter and him together. His hatred of the first cunt/bitch and her partner in crime was was legitimate, and deserved. I liked his comments to the lying, cheating slut.

My only question to the author, do we know each other? Except for the number of children, you told the story of my life.

Not a fan of stories in which the protagonist runs away in a passive aggressive attempt to get even. Even less of a fan of a man who abandons his daughter. Choosing to live with her mother was not a betrayal to him. He never found out why she choose that because he didn't stick around to find out. To me, that is the definition of a coward.

What happened between the two adults was the betrayal. To extend that to the kid is deplorable. Too many adults forget about the kids in these divorces and just worry about hurting each other. Neither one of these adults tried to figure out what was best for her. They each decided that they would get custody. When the daughter was asked, she chose her mom. How heart wrenching was that choice to make? I'll bet it was the hardest thing she ever had to do up until that point. But, he didn't care. He ran away. Not admirable in one bit.

I could understand if he took some time to get away from everything to get his head clear. A year or two of solitude would be understandable. But he ran away from his daughter with the intent on never coming back because her mother betrayed him. I honestly can't see why the second woman would want to have a kid with him.

But, I didn't have to respect the protagonist to enjoy being taken on a journey. The writing was very good and pulled at the emotions. A story well told. 5 stars from me.

Very well written, I can relate

Just a growing sense of frustration until after the girlfriend disrespects him, I had enough. This absolutely has that MM feel that makes you want to go outside and beat the hell out of the first stranger you meet. I usually like your stories. This was a blame the victim fest. I hated those bracket transitions. Very distracting.

henry dealt with the betrayal maybe poorly. the legal system is totally unfair in divorce concerning adultery. usually favoring the wife. so the husband gets fucked, over not only by a cheater but raped legally by the system . it is not a pleasant feeling to lose everything and everyone you care about so coldly. walking away is not easy and i myself have held onto my hate for close to 20 years. if you are not the custodial parent you have no say in how they are raised and therefor your time with the children can be manipulated with extra curicular activities so your visits are not really spent with the kids just running around. may as well just be watching in pictures.

i do like the story, just wish tom would have got at leaste one ass kicking.

Rough situation, I've been the child in those situations and I know it isn't always as cut and dry. That being said my parents didn't divorce due to infidelity and especially not to a friend of one of my parents.

When did they take the time to make it easier on him in all this? If they had had a third party maybe something else could have been arranged. I'm glad he gets to have a partial Redo with his new wife.

Tom and his ex....how were they contrite or what did they sacrifice in this?

They got off REALLY easy.

Enjoyed the story and I felt the plot was well worked. Look forward to future postings. Thanks.

The problem with these types of stories is that the all knowing wisdom of women is the driving force. I'm not enamored of "the guy runs away" stories. It gives absolute power to the woman because his life is irreparably destroyed. Bull. Breakups are tough. But recovery is definitely possible. Wallowing stories are not enjoyable.

However, the author wanted a guy to wallow in his sadness. OK. Some guys do that.

Then, magically, things turn around. Having been on his own for 8 years, all of a sudden, for no reason, Henry is open to love. Wow! He has met no nice women since he left? There is just this "attraction" to Kellie? Well, I suppose so. It just feels like it was stuck in because the story required it to happen.

Then Kellie finds out about Henry's past. Does she work out her concerns with Henry? Nooooooo. She goes to the people who betrayed him. Wow, what a supportive girlfriend. NOT! This is another betrayal of trust. Another woman gets to do it HER way no matter what Henry wants. It's jammed down his throat.

As I said, I don't like the wallowing. I GET that his daughter was faced with a tough decision and a manipulative mother. If it had been Henry's CHOICE I would have been OK with a reconciliation with his daughter. A repetitive theme of the story is that women get to run over their men as they choose because, of course, women know what is best.

Well written with lots of emotion. I did not like the fact that a horrible wife cruelly destroys her husband and lives happily ever after.

I get so tired of those who want the victim (the man in most cases) to tough up and somehow put themselves through hell for those who rejected him and essentially threw him away.

He took care of his responsibility to the kid, she turned her back on him after stabbing him in the back.

Passive Aggressive.... bunk. No, not bunk bullshit. Manhating bullshit.

I am all for reconciliation with the daughter which came, in time, but at the moment there was nothing passive aggressive about it. It's not mature or grown up to stay "for the sake of the children".

A sad, well written tale of a real guy who was grievously harmed to the core of his being and who did what had to do to survive. Full marks.

While she didn't deserve to be abandoned did betray him. Remember, he did tell her what happened with her mom before the divorce hearing. So she had some idea that her dad wanted her to stay with him. Choosing to stay with her mother is not a betrayal however, not telling her father and explaining her reason for doing so before the hearing is. You don't just blindside the man who has loved and cared for you all your life to go with the people who betrayed him, even if it is your mother. You say ''Dad I'm going to go live with mom, not because i don't love you but because i'm afraid if she's not around I won't see her any more. I'm not going to abandon you, in fact i'm going to insist that she let's me spend 3 days every week at your place and share all birthdays and holidays regardless of what the custody agreement says and we'll talk on the phone every day to keep up on the days i'm not with you.'' Any father, even if he doesn't like those circumstances, will still understand that you are at least thinking of his feelings. But this daughter basically says "I choose them deal with it''.

I waffled between a 4 and a 5. Gave the benefit.

Good story with well done characters.

I enjoyed it and it had theme that could be true. I could understand him leaving but he could've sent letters and gifts through his attorney. He could've let his daughter know how bad a thing her mother had done and the friend . Every letter could've been how much he loved her and ended with what a low down dirty rotten slut whore sneaky pig her mother and Tom are. He should have stayed in her life long distance through the lawyer. The courts should make people sell the home and split what's left then put that in an account for the kids to pay for what they need and the mother should have to work to support herself and her end of the child support especially if she is the one who cheated. How does a court look at a divorce and see it's the wife and best friend and allow custody and them to move into the house hubbys been paying offf for 16 years and that be ok . Also Tom should've been beaten up real bad at least once, he deserved it and being the guys friend he should've been in the hospital. The sneaky cunt could've gone on with wanting the divorce and than take up with his friend after the fact. It still would make him crazy but might not have caused him to disappear. The cunt told him after being together for 20 years that she never really loved him like that, I might have killed the two of them at that statement. Also 14 is old enough to know the truth and I would think would be rebellious and show hatred toward her mother and never have any involvement with that dick Tom. If the marriage sucked but they had what sounded like a good marriage and always invited the best friend with them . As a friend I wouldn't even allow myself to think of a friends wife in that way, it's unacceptable. Even if a spouse tragically died , I think the wife is off limits as anything other than a really close friend. Loyalty means a lot and if you wind up together that means there was something there all along. Where as some think how nice it is for people to move on together after tragedy, I just see it as betrayal even if the other party has passed , That goes for both husband and wife

I would say that most of you have no idea what that does to a kid. My father was the one who cheated with another woman. In fact, he was engaged to her before my mom and he were divorced. They married 6 months later.

I had to make the choice whether or not to stay with my mother or father. That broke me. I chose to stay with my mother, but it had NOTHING to do with loyalty against the cheater. As a kid, all you want is for your parents to make life simple again. To make things go back the way they were. But they can't. When you realize that, your worst fear is choosing one parent and having the other one hate you.

This ''father" affirmed that fear. In essence, he made the choice all about HIM. With me or against me. No middle ground. Come with me if you love me. If you love me, hate your mother.

Him running away and having no association with his daughter is what cruel assholes do. She was better off without him.

I rarely get emotional about stories, but this one hit close to home. I lived this story, but from the side that rarely gets talked about. All of you who say that he had to right to do what he did is only thinking about YOUR pain. No one ever thinks about the kid.

Why the fuck did he invite his ex-wife to the wedding?...

Hey Anon 10-5-16, read it again and pay attention! It was his daughter's wedding where he was walking her down the aisle. Of course the mother of the bride would be there.

Not one of my favorites, still 4 stars!

“We'd like to stay here so that Juliana can continue in her same school” – WHAT? Doesn’t old successful Tom have his own house? Why should Henry have to leave the house that he has paid for? If Julianna’s school is so important, let him have custody!

Her attitude! “of COURSE” she’s slept with him! Can’t divorce your husband without taking the lover out for a test drive, can we? And with his “best” friend?

Since they’re taking HIS house, why can’t Tom give him the condo? It’s only fair!

“Keeping Juliana's life as much the same as we could was our priority and Tom's condo was in a different school district.” – Repeating myself, so let Henry have custody! Then he doesn’t have to lose the house that HE paid for, and Julianna stays in her school.

Julianna shouldn’t be blaming her mother. SHE’S the one who chose to stay with her mother, and she should have known that would mean her father would have to move out.

“She had recently started dating a young man named Benjamin and they seemed very good together.” – Maybe someone should let Ben know Julianna’s views on fidelity!

“It would give me a great deal of comfort to know that he's gotten on with his life." – Oh, don’t be getting all noble now! If you cared that much you never would have done what you did. You would at least have let him keep the house, even if it meant giving him custody.

Kelly’s worried about Henry running out on Megan? Good! Don’t cheat on him and he won’t!

“it was still a little girl losing her daddy.” – No, it was a teenage girl choosing her mother over her father.

I’m sorry, good intentions or not, she shouldn’t have just sprung Julianna on him.

She should have had the guts to make him talk about the past and convince HIM to reach out to Julianna, and respect his wishes if he didn’t. She’s worried about him walking out on Megan? She might have created the “perfect storm” to guarantee it happening!

“She just wanted a little normalcy” – So it wouldn’t be normal living with her father?

If Kelly loved him so much, why couldn’t she trust him not to run off?

She talks about him trusting her enough to tell her about his past; why didn’t she have the rhetorical balls to fucking ASK him?

I’m sorry, I’m not happy with Kelly holding Julianna over his head if he wanted her,

I’m not happy with HIM asking for forgiveness. Once Julianna realized that her choice was costing her father his house she should have changed her mind, her mother had another place to live, her father didn’t.

I liked Jennie and Tom getting fat and not being able to have kids,

He had it right when he told Jennie that she could have easily talked Julianna into staying in the house with Henry, but it never even occurred to her!

LOL, I love the part about Kelly sending them a Thank You card on their anniversary!

@Anonymous Re: “Why?” – It wasn’t HIS wedding, it was Julianna’s!

You got all the characters to work and understand there life's . You did a fine piece of writing here . Alls well that ends well. He got his life back after 8 year of living in a bad place in his head. Some of these annoys comments are so off base and are they actually capable of reading and understanding a fine story.

Really hits home. Lived the same story mom ran on my dad I went with my dad got married wife ran out on me I moved also but I didn't abandon my kids have a great wife now and try every day to make life good for us.

America land of pussywhiped and wiling cucks.at least în fiction. What is this beed to nedle în somebody else shit. Kelly needs a ficționale rape în Africa Like his ex and dsughter. And him to suck the jizz out of the for the wiling cuck that he is. Enough hate now. The thing is altough Kelly was his girlfriend shw backstab him to by taking the whores side. They needva litle horible death

This was an unbalanced mass. The main character had no support mental or emotional. He tried to add balance by making the villain sterile so they couldn't have a child together. The whole story was just abominable.

stole a family and did not run. TK U MLJ LV NV

Started strongly but ended very poorly 2stars

For me, the heroes of the story are Kelly and Juliana. Frankly, Henry doesn't really deserve either of them. I'm not saying he shouldn't be mad at his ex and best friend...that was a horrible betrayal. But you can't take it out on your 14 year old daughter like that, she had a no win choice between parents, and she chose the comforts and familiarity of home. She wasn't choosing her mother over her father, and she didn't deserve her father abandoning her for 8 years like that. He didn't even let her explain her decision, he just ran off like a spoiled child. That's not what a real man does.

They are elements of the story I like, but ultimately its hard to get past the fact that Henry is not very likeable, at least to me. By the end, it seems as if he's at least happy with what he has, a loving wife, two young daughters, and an older daughter who has forgiven him. Just let go of the anger...you don't ever have to see the ex again, but you shouldn't let anger consume you like that.

"she had a no win choice between parents, and she chose the comforts and familiarity of home" - It WASN'T a no win choice! Choosing her father STILL gets her "the comforts and familiarity of home," and her mother is still close by at Tim's.

The proper response from Henry to Jennie and Tom is that they should just cease to exist. Hating someone and holding a grudge has no upside, you are spending emotional energy on people to whom you owe less than nothing. Make them simply disappear.

I can understand the sense of betrayal when Juliana chose to stay with her mother but she was only 14 - not her fault. Henry should not have abandoned her - that is what wimps do.

On the other hand, Jennie expecting Henry to mellow is also totally unrealistic. His hatred is simply her due for betraying him. She is supposed to spend the rest of her life feeling guilty.

I liked the story. Thought it was well written. Thanks.

Excellent portrayal of a credible situation. Author wrote the ex perfectly - completely narcissstic. She could be a JPB or PapaToad wife, and this is a high compliment. She wasn't psychotic enough to be a Stangster wife. Author wrote the husband's character perfectly as well - he was betrayed too many times. I appreciate the good ending. Well done!

The daughter was likely too upset to make a good decision and was manipulated by the narcissstic mother. The distinction, though, between Lex1's situation and this daughters is that Lex1 chose to stay with the wronged and alone spouse, which, though painful, was the right decision. Had the daughter had the presence of mind to tell the judge that she wanted to stay with her dad, this story would have been completely different.

5 *

Thanks for sharing your efforts with us.

It shows how the fantasy of adulterers can cause so much heartache.

I'll be looking out for your stories from now on.

When a story is written in the first person it's done so the reader can feel a connection with the main character. That connections is broken when everyone in the story becomes a first person narrator. A while back I read another comment for a story that was written the same way. The comment was from a fine writer in his own right but I won't say who it was. He said it was a lazy way of writing and I wholeheartedly agree. There is no flow to the story when this is done. It's a bunch of vignettes thrown together to form a story. Yes, the story gets told but there's just no continuity.

The other problem I had with the writing was bouncing around between past and present tense. Unless you're writing a very short story about one moment in time, you can't tell a story in present tense and to bounce between present and past is a definite no, no.

As for the content of the story, I thought it was pretty well thought out. I liked that the author gave us a little more backstory on the protagonist to further explain his pain. About the only part that didn't seem believable to me was how fast he turned around after the tongue lashing he got from Kelly. That seemed a little quick to me. I would have had him mull things over, over night, at least.

I still thought it was a good effort and gave it 4 stars.

I read Lex1's comment.

I had a more similar childhood to this story; mother cheated on father, she pushed him away, later discovered attempted to twist us (children's) perspective of father. The father having no other choice (financially and support) than to move miles (states) away to live with nearest sibling. May seem like abandonment but, when left with no other choice, what options do you really have: Death or life in misery? And, yes he had even attempted suicide. But, like the woman in this story all the conniving and twisting she barred on her children has eventually left her with a certain amount of emptiness. Also, the part on her & new hubby not being able to have children wasn't lost on me...

So, would it come down to who the worse bad guy is? The father for everyone he loved getting ostracized & leaving or, the mother for her lack of true love. If she really loved her daughter and had ANY true feelings for the men in her life she would've mentions to her daughter that her father needed her more at that moment when everything he loved was being taken. Instead she is selfish, vindictive and conniving.

Again, my life story is almost on spot with tho story and, it took several years to repair a lost relationship w/ my father and discover all the hurt and disaster that a selfish, self-indulgent slut can cause - even though she is still your biological mother...

Without commenting for or against the story I want to say that Matt Moreau wrote at least 3 stories that had this scenario and result. MM hasn't written in a while and whether you like or dislike his work it does belong in LW

I really wanted to enjoy the whole story but really couldn't. I was happy to see Juliana reunited with her father BUT it was not Kelly's place to snoop and the spring Juliana on Henry. She definitely betrayed him and then refused to acknowledge his frustration and hurt. Kelly really is a terrible character and I don't know why anyone would want to marry her. Yes, Juliana and Henry's reunion was a great story arc but Henry should have been the instigator and not that awful selfish woman he ended up married to.

Story not bad... Kelly's actions not as believeable... His daughter's need for him and the RAAC not beneficial to the story... His reaction to his ex... WONDERFUL and saved a 4* rating

From the viewpoint of the child.

" As a kid, all you want is for your parents to make life simple again. To make things go back the way they were. But they can't. When you realize that, your worst fear is choosing one parent and having the other one hate you."

Sometimes you wonder whether some people calling an end to their marriage should have been allowed to have children.

Lue

For all the chastisement of a 14 year old's choice.

1. Mother was the primary caregiver. For better or worse, she was a stay at home mom. There were no indications she was a poor parent, but yes was a betraying spouse. If the child is having to make a choice who she will stay with, absent other elements, it makes sense to stay with the person who is the main one who takes care of them. Kids are minors and we expect them to need someone to actually take care of them.

2. Who would get to the point where she has to speak to a judge, and not speak to her beforehand? Her father should have had a thorough conversation with her about the divorce, what her options were, make clear if he was ready to taken on the role of primary caregiver, discuss what compromises either choice could entail. Again, he's the adult. She's the child. We don't punish or judge kids if we haven't prepared or taught them information.

As for Tom, it is odd that somehow they needed to move into Henry's house. If he's this successful Stanford MBA, he could buy his own house in the school district. Made no sense at all.

Truthfully, didn't make sense that there wasn't shared custody in general. They all lived proximately, and the ex and Tom didn't seem to want to screw the protagonist more than they already had.

That said, for well written overall. I felt Henry's denouement of his ex at the wedding was a bit long winded for the context, but perhaps cathartic for the author as much as anything else :)

should ever be allowed to have children.

Interesting how the husband is chastised for just trying to survive while the cheating whore or a spouse is defended.

If you have to hang around seagulls eventually you will have to clean-up gull poop because the gull sure as hell isn't going to do it.

Excellent point! I didn't even think of Tom buying a house nearby, so that she keeps her school, Henry keeps his house, and they're close enough to share custody!

I loved this story, a 5 from me. If I could have given it a 10, I would have.

This was very close to my own life. My best friend from 4th grade, my wife who I'd met in 3rd grade. They actually went out a few times through school but, never, that they admitted to me, fucked. I learned later how wrong I was about that.

We'd been married for 9 years when the hammer fell on me. Two little girls, 7 and 5, absorbed the ramifications. My mother always warned me Bill was a third wheel to a beautiful marriage and it wasn't for the best. But who was she to know, he was my best friend.

So imagine when I came home from work to find our rental empty and a note with divorce papers on the kitchen counter. Kate had taken my two little girls and moved in with Bill, filing for divorce. She wanted half of everything but all of my family.

I tried to talk with the girls but Kate had already poisoned their minds. The two little girls I played with each night, pushed them on the swing, took them camping and swimming, actually shrank from me. They both hid behind their mother as if I were the boogey man. When I pushed to have them come to me, they began crying and ran for BILL'S house. Not toward their own father. That was the end.

As a carpenter I could find work anywhere. I went home, with my soon to be ex begging me to wait, the girls were confused, and began packing. I signed the papers, dropped them off at a lawyers office and told them I would be in contact after I found a new job to begin paying child support. Within two hours I was driving away from everything and everyone I knew.

Driving across the US, I found myself outside of Libby Montana and instead of carpentry, I found a job running equipment to a business that leased out to a local coal mine. Even, as Henry did, taking a cut rate in cash pay, I made more money than ever before in my life. Instead of the $40K I made as a carpenter, my first year saw me earn $105K, in cash.

When I contacted my lawyer, he immediately let me know I was in arrears over child support. They went by my old $40K income and I was 3 months late on child support payments. Only after gaining his promise he wouldn't let anyone know where I was, did I begin sending cashier checks for a total of $800 per month. $800 for my wife and Bill to spend in their own way. Fuck, that still pisses me off.

Allen, my lawyer, tried to explain to me many times how much my wife wanted me back in their lives. The girls missed me and cried themselves to sleep every night, is how she tried to grab at his heart. He had letters from her she asked him to send me but I told him to either give them back or burn them. He gave them back. Then she gave him envelopes full of letters from my girls and I asked him to burn them too. Everyone made their choice, but no longer did they have good old Geoff to kick around. Let them live with their decisions.

Seven years after I was shitcanned, I received word from Allen he needed to speak with me. It seemed Bill had a penchant for beating my ex, something that didn't particularly surprise me. I'd seen him around women on dates, as had my wife. So hell, she chose him, she could take the good hard right haymaker punch. My ex was in the hospital, badly injured and they weren't sure if she would survive. It appeared Bill has almost beaten her to death. He was in jail and the girls had no one but Kate's family to care for them. He wanted to know if I wanted custody.

Once I he assured me I couldn't keep them without contacting Kate if she survived, I told him no thanks. They could stay with her family. He was surprised, knowing how badly I had wanted and loved my girls.

That was 14 years ago. My girls would be 26 nd 28 now. Kate didn't survive and Bill is serving life in prison. Once they were both 18, I stopped the mandated child support and lost contact with Allen. Only once before the support stopped did he ask to forward my address to the girls and I refused. To this day I still have nightmares about how they recoiled away from me, as if I was there to harm them.

That was my first life, as was written in this story. Exactly what I always called it. Now I'm remarried, have a beautiful wife who was unable to have children after surviving a battle with uterine cancer in her teens. We've been married for 16 year and couldn't be happier. She is 9 years younger than me with the excitement and zest for life of a much younger woman. When you've stared death in the eyes and thought you'd never life a life, it does something to you.

Here in the mountains of north Montana, we spend our time hiking, hunting, fishing and camping. During the winter months we snowshoe and cross country ski. My wife and I are fit and she is a beauty to behold. Is she happy about my past and refusal to see my girls? No. Does she understand it? Yes, but it's something we don't talk about, it makes her angry. Will I ever speak to my girls? Probably, years ago I began my own business and had to begin using my social security number.

If my girls ever really wanted to find me, they have only to do a basic search. Me? I'm fine either way.

You wonder if seagulls even care for their babies. Maybe they turn them over to the Pelicans to raise. You wonder if the woman whose husband Luedon slept with while she was having her baby thought the baby should be with the two people who betrayed her, or stay with her? You wonder how much of a crisis of conscience Ludon had while she was sleeping with the baby's father. You wonder if she moaned about the baby's fate while she was betraying its mother. We wonders, aye, we wonders.

Loved it and appreciated the fact that it didn't unrealistically end with everyone forgiving and forgetting. Hid s peach to his ex at the wedding was dead on. Good for him.

While I don't much like your writing - and that isn't mean as an attack - the reason why I gave this story only one star is simple: Henry had crossed the Rubicon. He had decided, in my opinion rightly so, that his daughter had chosen her mother over him. So be it. The dye had been cast. I don't believe that the Henry depicted in this story would later accept his daughter back into his life. Simple as that. Nor should he. Furthermore, Kelly had taken, again just my opinion, a step far too far in contacting his former wife.

it seems very real. I do like the fact that he never forgave his wife and best friend. It would have seemed real hokey if they all became friends and lived happy ever after. Enjoyed this one a lot. Thanks for the story. A "5" for me.

"Buckeye Fan"

I enjoyed how it was written good story line and characters I enjoyed the symmetry i saw in the story and the ending. Well done.

Please keep writing and I will keep reading.

I would have liked to see a richer emotional response from him beyond just anger...just to make him more three dimensional and more relatable. Other than that, I think the biggest fantasy in LW beyond "you can beat someone up and threaten them into not reporting it" is the idea that the guilty party EVER considers their part in the anguished response of the betrayed. They never, never say "Oh, we didn't know how much pain our actions would cause. Gosh we messed up." They say "What's his fucking problem? What an asshole. Get over it." And, frankly, so do the kids in a case like this one.

I would have loved to see the inability to have kids of their own drive the two cheaters apart, frankly. Don't write them a happily ever after.

While it started out closely resembling another story on here the ending of this was much more realistic. It would make sense to forgive a decision a 14 year old made. I sure would hate to have every decision I made at 14 to be held against me. It also makes sense to never forgive the ex-wife and ex-friend. Thanks.

the idiot is the idiot again and finally gave up and.........

now he is happy to have all those so loving people around him.

his best friend always jealous of his life who planned to get his wife and daughter

his ex-wife who did not want a blue-collar worker

his girl (hey I was 14 myself and had a brain then) who did choose her nice uncle and all his gifts

his new "wife" nosy and manipulative

and so they lived happily ever after

crap2 as far as the story is ending

this is rather a fairy tale and a cheesy one

Fucking horrible bitch Kelly was.

Pleased i skimed this one

...especially from the list of Anonny folks.

1) The guy was NOT a Wimpy, willing cuck. Far from it.

2) The guy WAS a victim of CHILD ABUSE - his mother was about as loving and emotionally supporting of him as Leonard Hoffsteader's mom (a Big Bang Theory reference for you in case you're unfamiliar) - and his step-dad was an actually abusive asshole. Hence, he was NOT emotionally equipped to deal with anything resembling further abuse. So when the Wife/"Best-Friend" lay the turd on him, he's already at the end of his mental/emotional resources. His daughter's _further_ "betrayal" put him beyond his coping ability, leaving him in "flight or die" mode, mentally. So, those of you taking issue with his "abandonment" of his 14-yo daughter missed the part about his mental well-being and emotional background context.

3) As for the 2nd-wife's "ambush" of him, I'm about 50/50 on that. Her concern about his character in "abandoning" his first daughter IS VALID, so she deserves to bring that up before agreeing to marry him. HOWEVER, the criticism of HOW she went about that, IS ALSO VALID.

4) THE REAL ASSHOLE HERE WAS THE JUDGE RULING OVER THE DIVORCE. Judges and Court/Social Workers need to be proactive in ensuring decent communications between children and separating parents - IN ADDITION to their other roles in preventing (any further) abuse of the kids at the hands of said parents. Had there been proper communications between the father and daughter around the time of the divorce, then the whole situation later on would not necessarily have developed as it did. (However, that said, the story would not have been as good, either, so I grant the author's license to write the plot elements as they see fit, too.)

What really puzzles me here is how you folks managed to miss these fairly critical points (except for the Judge one, I'll grant you that).

And when he thought his only options were to kill himself or survive by cutting himself off from everything in his past life, that's about as depressed as someone can get. Maybe you could argue that he could have stayed in touch with the only person in that mess who had had any concern for his interests (his lawyer), which might have led to the lawyer contacting him to let him know that his daughter regretted her decision and an earlier reconciliation, but who's going to think about that when the mind is a coin flip away from swallowing a bullet?

I'm with you on the Judge!

As I think I've said a couple of times, why did the daughter's need to stay in the school district preclude his staying in the house? The custody order could have been modified allowing him to stay with his daughter in the house; his ex-wife as alternate accommodations, he doesn't, or as Wyldcard said, let Tom by a house in the district!

The story is crystal clear and clear about betrayal being awful and leaving one without a life unless you have a second life hidden away. Really he should have given his daughter a chance to understand his side of it and could have left a letter with the lawyer explaining why he fled. Then she could have replied through the lawyer but apparently he put her decision on a par with his wife's adultery. Personally I feel that it would have been more consistent for him take off again... But perhaps the need to leave behind his "new" daughter kept him from running again. But accepting his future wife snooping , I do not like it!

A lot of Matt's stories have major overlaps, but this story by BigGuy33 is remarkably similar to a cross of Quinn and Kimberly Harris and Red and Darla Clayton. In fact, all of the key points of this story are very close to elements of those two stories.

And, like the protagonists in those tales, I did not like the protagonist in this one. Running away is a coward's act. Abandoning a 14 year old is a coward's act. And, I don't like cowards.

the husband should stop being a bitch and be happy to be a cuck for his wife's new love life.

for Henry live well and reconcile with his lost daughter (as in the story) AND for Jennifer to cheat on her current hubby. karma is a bitch. Oh btw Jennifer divorces #3 hubby due to his cheating.

My sincere congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

First , to everyone comparing this to MM , some similarities , but Hubby was 6 ' tall , 200 lbs , and though not mentioned , was probably not endowed equally to a toddler . That in itself is a huge differentiation from 98 % of MM stories.

Lex 1 did have a valid point , but , given Kevin's own history , its believable . Don't studies show that children of wife beaters will most likely carry on that disgusting practice ? Same with Alcoholism , Drug abuse , ect. Doesn't make it palatable or right , but it does explain a little of the psychology behind it.

My one main quibble with the story is how fast Kevin gave in after his confrontation with Kelly and his daughter. Someone as wounded as he was , simply doesn't give up that self protective wall that took years to build that easily.

I think that the author could have actually prolonged that part , with some wonderful interaction between those three , that's what really makes the great ones great , IMHO.

But overall , I really did enjoy this BG33.

5 *'s

Not only "excuse the betrayers" but unrealistic as hell to boot. With someone with the history the author gave the protagonist, there is no humanly-possible way he would reconcile with another woman who betrayed him.

And how godawful patronizing does a grown woman have to be to decide SHE knows better that he what HE needs to do. Are you KIDDING ? The response to that is "good" and "bye."

After a realistic and terrific beginning, the ending turned into the worst kind of RAAC stuff. The writing was grammatically correct, but the plot went totally off the rails. I presume you had RAAC in mind all along, and you decided you'd get there no matter HOW unrealistic the journey had to become.

That was a lot of story, but a very good one. 5 stars.

Going after a friend's wife is among the lowest things a man can do. "We didn't mean for it to happen" is a terrible rationalization. It your obligation not to let it happen. Those are definitely not folks you want to be around.

This was as the title states all about Betrayal. That is a classic theme throughout history and always interesting. The tragedy was not the actual act of betrayal, it was the immature, and all around pathetic way the husband dealt with the betrayal. I get being stunned, but that also speaks of his lack of perception. I get being angry, your life is being fucked over by a selfish woman, but then if she was that selfish, she would already made that known in many other ways - and you wouldn't have been all that surprised or likely hurt. Who would want to be married to anyone who'd cheat? By definition a cheater is a low life, selfish, piece of shit - so as long as it doesn't cost too much - divorce the shit. As far as the kid is concerned - fight for her, turn her against her mother, get her to petition the courts for a change of custodial parent. I have seen daughters turn on their shitty mothers and move to Dad's on more than one occasion. Mothers and daughters often have rocky relationships - especially if mom hurts dad! This guy was a crybaby fool who never grew up and manned up. His girlfriend was a sneak, leaving only his daughter as a possibly likable character. All in all, it was an interesting story, but an unsatisfying tale.

His conversion seems to have happened rather quickly but other than that not much else I could find wrong.

Editing your own stuff is very difficult and I think you managed it fairly well. There were a few sentences that didn't quite gel.

"I'm right about 6'0" tall and weigh in at right about 200", from the very beginning of the story, is an example.

"I'm right about 6'0" tall" I understand you're going for a colloquial style but I always thought that you could be "right on", meaning precisely, so following it with about is almost like saying; "I'm precisely close to 6'0" tall" so it didn't work for me. Then you repeat the exact phrasing for weight.

In writing, repeats like that don't generally work. So, if I had been editing I would have suggested changing the meaning of the words and doing something to get rid of the repeat.

"I'm right about 6'0" tall and weigh in at right about 200."

Would change to:

"I'm 6 feet tall and weigh in at about 200 lbs."

(You have to add the pounds because you define what the height measurement is)

My version is shorter but avoids the repeats that jar the flow and added extra information to balance the 'feet'.

I changed from 6'0" to simply "6 feet" because if you were literal about 6'0" you'd have to read it as "I'm right about 6 feet, no inches tall and … "It's a bit of mouthful.

Editing is more than grammar. I hope you take this in the spirit it was intended which was just to give you stuff to consider as you write.

Think about it … use it … ignore it … your choice!

Keep em coming.

One star

Every time that I read one of your self righteous criticisms I realize just how brilliant you are. Yeah, right, at least in your own mind. Great story. Thanks!

The wife gets away with having a good life. So she got fat, big deal. Henry should have left the other woman for talking to his ex-wife. Some authors love to humiliate the men who were betrayed by their wives.

Overall excellent job. Though, I would have preferred an elaborate plan for electrocution of his prick "best" friend.

At any rate, a few of things must be said. First of all, his conversion and eventual proposal in the wake of the dressing down he got from Kelly after her throwing the key back was rushed. The ground work for it is established well enough by his own good behaviour and thoughtfulness over the years, but it felt too clean. Just my opinion.

Next, the big soliloquoy that he gives to Jenny at the wedding was way, way too psychological and way too long among other things. For god's sake it was longer than the damn Gettysburg Address! The situation simply would not have allowed for that type of thing, omg, all of the sob storying about his dipshit mother and her boyfriends, etc, etc, bla bla bla. It just wouldn't happen in that way. It's too convenient, and frankly, I took zero pleasure in his words. None at all. It came off like a chatty bitchfest and I found myself wondering if he only had one ball between his legs.

Ultimately, his rotten ex-wife is so supercilious. All of her phony concern never rang true. Yet somehow one finds the author allowing her transparent ministrations as some type of salve for the situation. I found the motivation of the writer to include all of her self serving declarations and crocodile tears a highly questionable element in the story. Are readers supposed to commiserate with her? Are we to feel relief that those people who DO stab the husband in the back are able to exhibit such concern for him?

Please allow me to suggest that if the author feels the need to work such a forced equanimity for his characters into the equation then he place the story in Romance. Lots of us out here like our Bitches crispy :))

At least the author allows the jilted husband his own sovereign feelings in the end, and doesn't make him subject to more feminine manipulations.

But why does the author never once provide his longsuffering readers a single satisfying moment of recompense for the protagonist?

Honestly, at the wedding when he turned around to finally encounter his Ex he should have guffawed lightly:

"Jesus, what the hell happened to you, Jennifer? You look like a cow!".

Yeah, you heard it. Why not? The husband doesn't get a single damn zinger the whole story. All he gets is a brooding nimbus of bad feeling. The author needs to have a little spice and a few curveballs thrown in there.

My biggest problem with Kelly was her springing Julianne on him.

She should have admitted to her snooping, confessed her concerns with his running away vis-a-vis Megan, and urged him to contact Julianne.

He would have had a chance to reassure her that as long as she was loyal to him that would never be a problem, and that if she REALLY loved him she would trust that he would never do anything to betray that trust, and support him in whatever decision he made about Julianne, certainly NOT use emotional blackmail to force him to do what SHE believed was right!

though I kind of liked the story. I can see his reaction to the in your face and fuck you dumping he got from the wife and the feeling betrayed by the daughter. But I can't see him forgiving the new girl friend. I really think that people who always "know" what's best for someone else are not easy to be around. I think that with his background he would have taken more manipulation to get him to start placing the blame for everything on himself. I felt the story got too "busy" at the point of realization and couldn't buy the reconciliation. But do keep writing, parts were very well done and I can forsee better stories all the time. Thanks for sharing your talent with us.

I really liked the story. There wasn't a "hot sex" moment, so that reduced the score a little, but the description of the husband to the wife of the depth of the betrayal and why he could never forgive her and the former best friend was one of the most emotional passages I have read on the site.

It's common for the custodial parent to have occupancy of the family home until the child/children reach adulthood. So Juliana's decision to live with her mother was what threw her father out of the family home. Had she asked to live with her father, she would have been living in the house with him instead of with her mother and stepfather.

Really well written other than the death threat part, which was dumb and over the top. (And the fact that he maintained it over the years made him continue to be a jerk.) So, I liked how the character was developed so that everything he did wasn't right (other than the death threat). However, his realization that he was in the wrong was lightning quick. There should have been more drawing out of the realization because that is actually the climax of the story. We should be allowed to savor that and then have him go through the probably more difficult emotional process of coming together with his girlfriend and his daughter. (Him getting on his knees was also over the top.) So, it was the denouement which I think was too pat and he was in free fall after that. I think it is hard for an intensely proud man, and that is what we have here despite the blows to his ego over and over, to admit he is wrong. To actually have him humble himself. You don't think you are right, dead right, for 8 years and turn on a dime in 5 minutes asking for complete and utter forgiveness. Otherwise, a great engrossing story. 4*

I think his keeping all the paperwork from his past was something of a Freudian slip. And don't forget he also snuck back to see his daughter graduate high school. Kelly's actions, which could have ended with disaster, were accepted by him because they were the deus ex machina he was secretly hoping might happen someday.

Male lead was able to grow, finally, with the help of a good woman. He kept what was important to him and incorporated what was new to him and important. Sometimes it just takes time (and not being around them with a baseball bat). What comes to mind is the movie The Sting with Robert Redford and Paul Newman. Early in the movie after his friend was killed, Robert Redford says something that if he was a killer, he'd kill him. All Redford knows is how to scam him. And with that skill set, that what he does.

The male lead leaves. He goes underground and starts off a new life again. That was his skill set. But he does stay true to himself. Lets the ex-wifey and ex-friend know in no uncertain terms that they continue to be shit.

Living better is sometimes better than revenge, not always, but if that is your skill set....

You get a whole different perspective when someone in your family or circle of friends is struck down. A whole different perspective.

re:

Really well written other than the death threat part, which was dumb and over the top. (And the fact that he maintained it over the years made him continue to be a jerk.) So, I liked how the character was developed so that everything he did wasn't right (other than the death threat).

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He was completely betrayed by someone he trusted totally since he was 8 or 9 years old.

This is not a minor event.

This was purposeful harm done to him.

In many facets of life abuse of a position of trust is a major crime.

That he didn't say 'I will kill you no matter what' but rather 'If you try to talk to me, I will kill you' is great restraint not a man out of control.

I printed this story and took a nice shit on it. The ex wife should rot in hell after a hard death of AIDS and her asshole husband is on deaths door with Aids from butt fucking gay boys on the street. A woman is the life support system for a cunt.

He should sign the 'thank you' cards too and include some pictures of his slim wife and their children.

Many say that the best revenge is living well.

But that is greatly improved upon by rubbing their noses in it.

Thanks for sharing.

Should be in gay male.

How come she couldn't satisfactorily answer the accusations she levelled at him? Oh that's right! Guys are always in the wrong.

Her husband left her because she wanted him to wear a dress is, no doubt, the real story.

Thanks for nothing BigGay.

Why don't you critical little whiny snatch's wash your cunts of the snarky shitty remarks and learn to wipe from front to back.

The story BigGuy33 wrote wasn't just fine, it was great.