Betrayed

I was on a roll now.

"Fine, yes, I worried about you walking out on me and Megan because you had already done it once before, but once I heard the story I understood. I didn't agree but I understood. But this whole thing could have been avoided if you had trusted me enough to talk to me and tell me about yourself. That's what people in love do, Henry. They talk. They trust. They share. I've shared everything about myself, even the things I wasn't proud of, because I trusted you not to judge me, and more importantly, to take care of me. I didn't need you to, Henry. I wanted you to. Sometimes life and love are painful. They just are. But that's what makes the good parts of them so good. So take your damn key."

I threw his key at him as hard as I could and hit him square in the chest. I was kind of pissed that he didn't even flinch.

"Go ahead and run so you can find someplace where you can just exist like you did for 7 years, instead of living like you did with me and Megan for the last 8 months. If that's what you want then go find it. Walk out on a woman that adores you and another child that loves you. But I want something more, and I wanted it with you, but I guess that's just another bad thing to happen to me."

I turned and walked out of his room without looking back, slamming that crappy little door behind me as I went. I felt the whole damn building rattle from the impact but I didn't care on bit. I wanted him to chase me down and beg me to stay because I loved him so much, but I was telling the truth when I said I wasn't going to live with someone wallowing in anger and bitterness.

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HENRY

I watched her stomp out and slam the door behind her. Believe it or not, this was the first time I had considered that I may have done something wrong. I had a right to protect myself, to insulate myself from the people that had stomped on my heart, right? Why should I have to subject myself to them? It never occurred to me what else I might be costing myself. And I had already admitted to myself I didn't want to leave. I wanted Kelly and Megan. And maybe now I could have Juliana, too, at least in part. Oh boy. This was going to take some serious ass kissing.

I stopped my stupid packing and went outside. Kelly's little car was already gone. I could only hope that she was headed back to her place, but if not I would camp on her doorstep until she came home and beg her forgiveness.

As I pulled into her parking lot her car was there so I knew it was time. I deserved whatever she gave me. I just hoped I hadn't lost her. I got down on my knees, which is not as easy as it once was, took a deep breath, and then raised my hand to knock on the door but before I could bring it down on to the wood the door swung open.

Kelly leaned against the door frame as I raised the house key she had just recently thrown at me toward her.

"What do you want?" she asked.

"I'm sorry, Kelly. You were right and I was wrong. I love you, and I love Megan. I can't lose you. I was stupid and angry and selfish, and I don't want to be those things anymore. I'll tell you anything you want to know if you'll forgive me. I need you, and I want you. Please."

The silence was deafening. She stared down at me while I stared up at her. Finally she reached out and took the key from my fingers.

"Okay, Henry. I'll forgive you. But on one condition." She opened the door all the way. "You need to make things right with Juliana."

I stood up and walked through the door, pausing to take her hand and give her a kiss on the cheek. She squeezed my hand back and she stopped and kissed me on the lips. Thank God we were okay.

Juliana was sitting on the couch. She was not crying now but clearly had been. I knelt down in front of her and took her hands in mine. It had been so long since I held her hands in mine, and I was struck by how it felt so foreign and yet so familiar at the same time. The emotion washed over me in an instant and my eyes were watering before I ever said a word.

"Juliana,' I started. "I am so sorry for what an idiot I was. I was so...angry and hurt by what your mother did that I couldn't see or think straight. After what your mother and Tom did to me, I believed that when you decided to live with them that you chose to betray me as well, and there was no way I could stay after that. And so I left. I convinced myself that you wouldn't care since you had chosen them over me."

"But daddy, I didn't..." Juliana tried to interrupt, but I stopped her.

"I know, baby, I know. But that's what I thought, how I felt. I was wrong, I know that now. Thanks..." I looked at Kelly. "...thanks to Kelly I finally understand just how wrong I was. And hopefully I can forgive myself one day. But today I ask for your forgiveness, with a promise that I will always be there for you from this day forward. Can you forgive me, Juliana?"

"Of course I forgive you, daddy. I was never upset with you. I was just sad at what happened. I know how much what mom did hurt you. I just wish you had talked to me first. Maybe you still would have left, maybe not, but at least I would have had a chance to tell you how I felt. But I do forgive you daddy. And I hope you can forgive me for choosing to live with mom."

"Honey, that decision doesn't need forgiveness. I love you and always have. Yes, that was me at your graduation. We had worked so hard to get to that moment that I just couldn't miss it. I saw you and realized you recognized me. I moved to a different spot, but I was still there. I saw the whole thing, and I have never been so proud in my life."

Juliana and I wrapped our arms around each other, hugging to make up for the 8 years of each other's lives that we had missed. We pulled apart and I followed Juliana's eyes as she found Kelly, who was quietly crying in the corner. Juliana reached out her hand, inviting Kelly into our hug, and soon we were one big huddled mass of tearful humanity.

Finally I pulled away. "Hey, baby, where's Megan? I asked.

"She's next door with Mrs. Pritchett. I had a feeling things would be getting...emotional."

"Go get her, please. It's important."

Kelly stepped out and a minute later was back with Megan. Megan ran and gave me a hug, like she always did when we got together. I carried her into the other room for a private chat.

"Do you remember," I said, "what I promised you about me maybe becoming your new daddy?"

"That I'd be the first one to know," she said.

"Exactly. Watch this."

I went back into the living room. Kelly was sitting next to Juliana on the couch and they were just chatting away. I stood in front of Kelly and took her hands, standing her up.

"Kelly," I said. "Honey, I want to thank you for loving me enough to do for me what I couldn't, or wouldn't, do for myself. You brought my daughter back to me, even when it was entirely my fault that there was such distance between us. I know that you were aware of how I might have reacted and you did it anyway. You were more concerned with what was best for me than what was best for yourself, and if that's not love then I don't know what is. And what you did for me only made me even more certain of something I was already sure of."

In one motion I pulled the ring box from my pocket and dropped to one knee.

"Kelly my love, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

Kelly's eyes widened and her eyes started to moisten immediately.

"Yes, baby, yes! Of course I'll marry you."

I slid the ring onto her finger, and then she pulled me to my feet and wrapped her arms around me. We kissed with passion and purpose, finally stopping when we remembered the 2 sets of eyes watching us.

I looked at my daughters, both new and old. "Looks like you girls are going to be step-sisters."

"Not step-sisters," Juliana corrected me. "Just sisters."

I took my new family out to dinner that night and we ironed out the details for the wedding. We planned to go before the county Justice of the Peace as soon as possible. Neither of us wanted to wait. But I started moving into Kelly's apartment that night.

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I thought I looked pretty good in my tuxedo. I know for sure Kelly looked stunningly beautiful in her light pink dress. She was 3 months along and just starting to show. The wedding had been beautiful. Juliana looked like a princess and Benjamin ('don't call me Ben') looked thrilled to see my daughter and I walking down the aisle. He seemed like a nice guy, though I had spent little time with him. But Juliana loved him and that was all that mattered.

I had deftly avoided directly crossing paths with Jennie or Tom so far today, though I did catch a glimpse of them from across the room a couple times. There had been no way to completely avoid them over the last couple of days as the final preparations took place for the wedding, including the rehearsal dinner, but we had been so busy there was no time for any sort of conversation.

Both Jennie and Tom had put on a significant amount of weight. When Jennie was 36, which was when she had dumped me, she still looked amazing in a bikini and her weight was right around 115. Looking at her for the first time in about 8 years, I was shocked to see that she was easily over 200 pounds. She had said that life with Tom was so good that she had grown 'fat and happy'. (I couldn't speak to happy, but the fat was true enough.) I suspected, and at the risk of sounding childish and petty I hoped, that she had eaten her guilt over what she did to me.

Kelly and I were standing together, hand in hand and lost in conversation with a couple of Ben's (sorry, Benjamin's; this is going to take some getting used to) relatives and I didn't see them approaching behind me.

"Hello Henry."

Her voice, which had once been like a cacophony of angels in my ears, now struck me like fingernails on a chalkboard. Had her voice always been that high-pitched? I had forgiven Juliana, or rather had gotten her to forgive me, but my feelings for Jennie had not mellowed in the least, I realized. Nonetheless, for Juliana's sake, I tried to put on a happy face. I turned to face her...them.

"Hello Jennifer."

I saw Tom begin to say something but I held up my hand to stop him.

"Tom, do you remember the last thing I said to you. Nod if you remember." He nodded. "My feelings have not changed."

He made a point of speaking to Jennie. "Honey, I'm gonna get a glass of punch. Want anything?" She shook her head no.

Kelly piped in. "I'll join you, Tom. I could use a drink." It was an obvious ploy to leave Jennie and me alone, and I watched them until they were out of earshot.

Once they were gone we stood there in silence momentarily. I could have gone forever without speaking with her again but obviously that was not on the agenda. She spoke first.

"I would have hoped after this amount of time that things like that wouldn't happen anymore. I guess I was wrong."

"You were. Is there something you want, Jen?"

"Yes, Henry. I want us to get past this. I'd like us all to be friends. Kelly is beautiful and you guys are so happy together. You're gonna be a daddy again..."

"I already am a daddy again," I reminded her. I was referring to Megan, who I was in the process of adopting, something Jennie had been made aware of yesterday..

"Yes, of course. My point was that while we took a painful path to get here, we're all happier than we were before. So I had hoped we could put the hard feelings behind us and move forward; if not as friends, at least being friendly."

"I'm afraid you're going to be disappointed, Jen. You know how much I loved you back then?" She nodded. "That is how much I still hate you and Tom now. It hasn't gotten any better."

"But why, Henry? It's been over 8 years. I understand that we could have handled it better, but why is it still so intense?"

"I'll try and spell it out for you, then. First, I don't think I ever told you that my mother cheated relentlessly on my father. She would have her boyfriends pick her up at the house while dad and I played games or whatever. Dad tried to get her to stop but she wouldn't so he resigned himself to it, until she left him completely and divorced him to marry one of them. Soon after that he killed himself."

"I didn't know that. You told me your dad died of a heart attack."

"Well, I found the actual truth a little embarrassing. But that's really just background. Jennie, I loved you and I was in love with you. You were all that I ever wanted, and not once did you even suggest that I wasn't that to you. I thought we were going to grow old together, enjoy our grandkids, all of that. But those dreams were shattered, and you made it clear that I was never what you really wanted. I would do, since I could support you and you wouldn't have to work, but obviously you were open to someone you thought was better, even if you weren't actively looking. Do you have any idea how inadequate that made me feel? I felt like I had wasted my life."

"I'm sorry about that. It's not like I didn't love you, Henry. I did, just...not like that. I couldn't help how I felt."

"That's true, and if that's all it had been I may have been able to move past it. I had exactly 3 people in my life that meant anything. I don't work in an office where I make friends with my coworkers. I go to work every day and get in a truck by myself and go fix things for people I don't know and may not see again. I ate lunch alone every day unless I had a job close to home so I could come home and eat with you. Then I came home from work and spent all my time with a wife I loved, a daughter I adored, and a best friend who knew me better than anyone. And then, in one sentence, 2 of the 3 people that I loved and trusted destroyed nearly everything I thought I knew. They did it together and they did it on purpose."

"Henry, we didn't mean for it to happen."

"But you didn't stop it, either. You decided you were going to reach for the brass ring and consequences be damned. Do you have any idea how long it took me to even think about trusting a woman again? But even that wasn't enough for you, was it? It wasn't enough that I lost my wife and my best friend to each other. No, you had to take my daughter, too."

"Juliana made that choice on her own."

"Bullshit! Look me in the eyes and tell me you didn't work on her to stay with you." I made my voice a higher pitch."'Oh honey, I know it'll be strange having Tom here instead of daddy, but at least you'll still be able to have me here when you get home from school. And I promise you can see your dad as much as we can manage.'Tell me nothing like that ever happened!" She couldn't, and she knew it.

I continued: "No, you just had to have it all. Your selfish, greedy ass just had to have everything, but with the man you really wanted. Why should your life have to change, right? Sure, you just destroyed the person who had loved and supported you for the last 16 years but who gives a damn about him as long as you get what you want. Did you, even once, consider saying to your daughter,'This is going to be really tough on your dad. At least Tom and I will have each other, so I think you should live with your dad so he won't be alone, and we'll see each other when we can."I already know the answer. Not once!"

"You're right, Henry. I guess I didn't think of things like that. But still, you disappeared without a word..."

"What the fuck did you think I would do, Jennifer? I had no one. My entire family had been absconded with, and my daughter had been convinced to go along with it. So what was I left with? Sitting at home alone 12 days out of every 14 knowing my life was continuing on without me just across town. My wife and my daughter in my house, only my wife was fucking my best friend instead of me. Just shoved me out and plugged him in. Running into each other on the street so I could see everything I had lost. Did you expect me to stay there and experience that every day for the rest of my life just so I could have a few days a month with a child that had tossed me to the side? As far as I was concerned I had exactly 2 choices: Cut all ties and leave or put a bullet through my brain. And frankly it was a tossup on which one I was going to choose even as I put distance between us. When I told Mrs. Perrine to tell you I'd see you in hell it was because I expected to be arriving there very soon. I even had the gun."

"God Henry, I had no idea."

"Of course you didn't. You were too busy going on with your life, with our life, without a care in the world, to give a crap about me. You had replaced me with the guy you wanted and you had talked your daughter into staying with you. You had everything you wanted and couldn't give a rat's behind about me. I even told you after the hearing that I'd be gone in a week. I didn't mean out of the house. I didn't mean out of the area. I meant dead. And did I once hear from you expressing concern or even asking what I meant by that? No. I finally realized that I wasn't going to give you the satisfaction. I didn't kill myself because I realized I hated you and that bastard enough to stay alive."

"Henry, I...

"Unfortunately," I continued as if her mouth had never moved, "I allowed my hate and anger to cloud my thinking when it came to Juliana. When she chose to live with you I thought she had sided with you and wanted Tom to be her father instead of me, so I overreacted and took off without another word. I'd like to blame that entirely on you, too, but I'll accept most of the responsibility for that. That cost me 8 years of her life that I can never get back. Thank God someone finally came along who actually loved me enough to think about my best interests, even possibly at the expense of her own. But you wouldn't know anything about that, about putting someone else first. Who knows how many more years I would have missed without Kelly pulling my head out of my ass. And I intend to show her for the rest of my life just how much I appreciate it. Now do you understand why I continue to hate you?"

"I suppose I do, Henry. I had hoped time would make a difference but it hasn't. I can only say I'm sorry for how we handled things. Maybe with a little more time, but I won't bother you about it again. Can we at least agree to be civil?"

"Of course. We do still share a daughter and while I will make every effort to avoid you, I realize that won't always be possible. For those times when we have to be in the same place I can manage to treat you at least as well as I would treat a stranger on the street. Just make sure your husband doesn't speak to me ever again or you'll be a widow."

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Epilogue

HENRY

Over the next 2 years I slowly bought out my boss as he moved toward retirement. I became the largest electrical contractor based in Marble Falls and one of the biggest in central Texas. I still went on calls myself a couple days a week but I mostly retired to running the business from the office, with my lovely wife and now 10-year old daughter serving on my office staff. Kelly handled the appointments; I handled the staff and the projects, and we did the paperwork together. Megan was an absolute joy and doted on her new baby sister, Katie.

As luck would have it, a year after the wedding Benjamin was offered a promotion to the office in Dallas. That's still about a 4 hour drive away from us, but we get to see them about once a month for a weekend visit. They seem very happy and they are expecting my first grandchild sometime next year.

I'd like to report that something horrible befell Tom and Jennie, other than their precipitous weight gain, but it didn't. While I have no interest in hearing about them, Juliana keeps Kelly updated on their lives, and Kelly occasionally mentions something to me. Kelly doesn't hate them like I do. Heck why should she? In fact, she appreciates them doing what they did because it brought us together. She sends them a thank you card every year on our wedding anniversary.