All Comments on 'Billie Jean'

I think all the tie-ins from other stories is creating a universe of its own for us Loving Wives lovers on Lit. Any other author ready to take the link forward??

I GAVE U AN XCELLENT.......I NOTICED PART OF YOUR NOM D PLUME WAS IN THE 1ST CHAPTER...."I GAVE MY "STANG" TO THE VALET." IT WAS DEFINITELY A 5 OR BETTER. WHATEVER THE TOP SCOREs ARE. TK U MLJ LV NV

This really should have been posted in Humour! But it would read well anywhere.

What a way to get The Angel of Death another plug and his Ex and Myra

who cares what harry says .. I liked it

Very well done. I thoroughly enjoyed the story. Loved the way you used the "known characters" in your work. And not to detract from the work you did but, extra credit for your new editor. You definitely stepped things up a notch or two in quality. I look forward to seeing your next weekly installment. You are in the top 5 of my favorite authors. Thank you for your time and effort, it is greatly appreciated.

I didn't really get emotionally involved because the tie ins took so much of your attention away from giving the main characters frustration any intensity....but it was fun anyway.

Though this was a very lengthy work, it held my interest from the beginning to the end. You used song titles throughout and blended them into the piece effectively. The plot was intriguing and multi faceted with a wide variety of characters that you developed and made most realistic through their actions, their dialogue, and their interactions.

I can imagine you had fun drafting this piece and bringing it to this point of a final submission, though it likely took an extended period to create a piece of this size, especially with the many stages needed to go from a draft to a final submission as well as working with an editor. I did notice a need for more careful proofreading to find all errors in spelling, omitted words, and some punctuation errors that the editor overlooked.

However, despite this minor critcism in this piece, I have find your work to always be enjoyable and of great quality. Thanks for taking the time and effort to create each piece you write and then sharing each here with us on such a regular basis. I for one truly do appreciate all your efforts and these pieces you posts.

Take care!

what was all that wierd cliched anti-Europe straw-man rubbish? Distracted from the story and made the lead character unsympathetic. I started thinking Cameron might have a had a point...

I really enjoyed this!!! Great job

Cudos on a great story and I loved the use of two of the bests characters. Thanks God for Thursdays and Stangstar's stories.

At least once a week we get a good, timely, story from you. There was a TV show, mornings out of Birmingham, Alabama."The Country Boy Eddie Show," would let just about anybody come and sing or play on TV. I remember a short,dark haired woman, girl really, who came and sang one morning, even with Country Boy Eddie's bad sound system, she sounded pretty good. She said she was about to go to Nashville and try to get on the Grand Old Opry. Her name was Loretta Lynn and I was glad to hear she done real well up there. Not long after, a hair salon worker from Midfield,Alabama started singing on the show several times a week. Later she too announced that she was going to try her luck in Nashville.Her name was, Tammy Wynette. Tammy co-wrote and sang,"Stand By Your Man". So a little research might help, but the story was still great.

Just so you know, Stand By Your Man, was a Tammy Wynette song.

Otherwise, I enjoyed the story, I really liked the tie in to WWWM by DQS.

My gods, the "evil twin" idea. It's over the top, but I liked it!

I have to agree with one anon though, what's up with the incredibly heavyhanded anti-European stuff? If it was meant as parody, it wasn't funny, just irritating. What's next, Yellow Peril? Seriously, what's up with that?

Whatever happened to Tina, Mary Beth's sister? For some reason I thought she was a part of the Billie Jean scam, but she wasn't? (Or did I miss clues?)

I do think the idea of using "crossover" characters from stories by other authors rather neat.

I'm sure I have more to talk about, but I right now I can't think of any. It was a worthwhile read!

Your stories are always riveting, but this one was extraordinary. You did a great job of tying 2 or 3 stories together. WWWM by DQS is a good story and I'm glad you were able to tie it in to this story. I also remember reading about Tyler and Marissa, but, since I've read so many stories on Literotica, don't remember the story title or who wrote it. I'll have to see if I can find it again.

Good job, as always.

Another Great Story!!! Well written. Grat characters and use of other characters not belonging to you! Loved IT!!!

I got excited when I saw another StangStar story. Even though I drive a Ranger pick-up I can appreciate Mustangs. The conversion from a loving wife to an untrusting, unfaithful one was a bit abrupt but necessary.

Man you really got it together for this one. This is by far your biggest and best, but you always have a terriffic story for us every week. Thanks for another one, YOU ROCK!

Don't sweat the euro comments. I have been doing business with Europeans for a long time and by and large, they sure do act like that towards us. It was actually nice to see it in print. There has been more than one meeting in france where I wanted to get up and address the snobs in German. You will get them to bitch when you call them out, but you will never get a "thank you". Thank God the younger crowd there doesn't have many of the old school hang-ups.

You will get a whole lot of nose up complaints from the self entitled, and a bunch of "don't hurt anyones feelings" from others - regardless, without pain and suffering there is no understanding or appreciation of happiness and contentment.

Keep up the good work.

Good read tho, right blend of humor, action, suspense, etc. The text photo of the boobs was classic, I'll be back next week for your next yarn.

This was simply fun to read. No, it wasn't painful or melodramatic or even particularly believable. Yes, I thought his attack on the Europeans was a bit over the top. Still, over 12 pages, it was just a lot of fun to read. I had a smile when I started, and a grin when I finished, which is one helluva nice ending from any story.

Strangely, though, I thought the ending a bit rushed.

Still, after 12 pages, I wasn't bitching!

Well done yet again.

P.S. And particular kudos to the editor who caught nearly all of your comma mistakes.

SUPER!

this was one of the best stories I have read on literotica

WoW!! after finishing WWWM yesterday and seeing that was the end (or something like that, for now) I thought I would go into depression....UNTIL....Stang, you just rocked it in a way I didn't think was possible, for a while anyway....the BEST I've read on the site...and the tie-in with Maitland, very clever and cudos to DanielQ for letting you go there..Keep it up!

The story was most interesting to me because of the way you mixed your story with another fine series.

Thanks for a super read! I think this is your best effort to date.

Thanks also for articulating the truth about the USA being the Good Samaritan to the world and serving as "whipping boy" at the same time.

You are among the best writers on this site.

After your last submission I thought you were drifting into the realm of unreadable JPB type drek. I'm happy to see that your once again living upto your great potential as a writer.

The writers of this story, perhaps in another life were limo drivers? Or tour bus guides? Or secretaries in a huge office? But of course they're now retired and live vicariously through younger people. No awards necessary, they've had their day.

My favourit StangStar06 story is Back on the Block. I hope you will write a new story where Jason Burton and his second wife will be in the background (with their children).

i never doubted that like michael jordan you can easily come up with a 60 point game from an off night.

nice touch on bringing together the characters we're familiar with from other stories.

i prefer you had billy jean from chicago so blake would have to deal with the greatest lawyer ever- renhquist! :)

good show! i look forward to you next offering a week from now.

I think so. it surely is a fun read. Cameos of characters from 2 of the most commented stories here in Lit also makes it interesting. Thank You! you did a wonderful job.

This is probably not the right place, but since it's been brought up, even in the story itself, I'll go ahead.

It's the stereotyping. Do all Americans really think that Europeans (I'll get back to this "European" thing in a bit) are stuck up snobs? So, as a contrast, the stereotype about Americans being America-centric is true as well? US vs them? (The wordplay here is awesome. United States, US, us vs them!) The biggest bully on the block, with the most nukes, so do as I say!

America is the world, and outside of America is Foreign Exotic Lands? Show them the American Way!

Now, don't go thinking that this is colored by my own personal experiences, unlike some of the other commenters. I've been to America once, and aside from the terrible treatment I got at customs, the Americans I met were very nice.

Now, about that European thing, there is no "European" as such. You guys DO know that Europe is made up of a LOT of countries? If you ask a person where he's from, he or she most likely will NOT say "I'm from Europe", but "I'm French/German/Spanish/Italian" etc, etc.

"European" is too generalized. Europe is NOT homogenous at all. Compare this to Asia, for example. What countries are in Asia? Russia, China, Japan, India, Iran, etc. Those cultures are as different as can be from eachother. You can say a Russian is Asian, and an Indonesian as Asian, but they're NOTHING alike.

Saying that something is "European" doesn't really mean anything unless you specify it more.

Now, as for the "America takes action whereas Europe twiddles its thumbs" bit. IMO, it's the bureaucracy. America only has one leader, the president. Europe has a LOT of presidents, kings, queens, etc.

If the US president says they're going to war, all the states in the US join in. If the French president says they're going to war, only France will do so, not all the other countries in Europe. If he wants the others to join in, well, lots of discussion and debating.

Imagine how fast America's decisionmaking would be if every governor of every state could simply say "no" and stay out of it? "Heck no, my state ain't gonna send any troops to Afghanistan!".

America is "fast" in that regard simply because it's a huge country under one unified rule.

*Gets off his soapbox.*

This is the Pony man story I come to love and make me look forward to Thursdays.

Great job and I got the biggest kick out of all the tributes/cross references.

Very effective used of DQS1's characters. A couple more Sarah and Chris stories would be appreciated.

You are without doubt now a member of the literotica ubarmasters, joining the list with others of your writing skills. Such as DQS, Renhquist, Ohio, x_JohnDoe_x and others such as that.

Would I have taken my wife back in these circumstances? Probably not but thats just me.

I am very impressed with your stories and this one is one of your best. Thank you for including some WWWM characters. That made your story "real", as it seems that that series has come to life.

I wish I could write as well as you. Maybe you and DSQ1 will inspire me to return to fiction writing, something I have not done for 30 years.

Kudo's..

You picked up on the different writing style of DQS and created a great story with many character like he did. You added your own style with it and the combination is a big hit. I loved how you used many of his characters, making it fun as you continued his story somewhat by using some of his enjoyable characters. I thank you for that as I too mourned that he had left, reading his last chapter just this morning. How delighted I was as just after reading his last I found this! I don't know what you will try next, but I look forward to it. I will now go back and read your previous stories. I didn't like the Hypocrite or Cuckold the first time. Thanks again Stang...

You Sir, are a master! I loved the story. Well written and captivating.

Well paced, entertaining, and though a work of fiction, the characters rang true.

And Mousse9 is right that EuroBureaucracy stymies prompt action. Fortunately, the world has the American Cowboys :)

Oh, and I hope Mousse9 was not too offended. I never felt that the "Trash-Talking" was heartfelt by the characte. It was just as much a part of the power negotiations.

What more can I say about a story, I truly enjoy reading your work and I think this story is a new personal best.

A great story. Loved the slam against the French. But since the author mentioned HIV by name... it struck me as odd that here we are at 40 comments and he has not yet posted any comments.

Masterful and brilliant, when I read the part about Bill Maitland, I had to stare at the wording, "no it can't be!"

My comliments and have to say the best ever, thank you for sharing.

Another great Thursday. Stangstar06 I don't know what I will do if you ever stop writing. I love my list of fave authors, but they don't post as consistently as you do. I can't wait for Thursdays to come. Again, great job. Now how will you top this?

Also knowing that WWWM is over for the time being, it was great to get another helping of Bill Maitland. Tyler and Marissa are also fun to revisit.

To anon, Tyler & Marissa comes from Renquist. That should make your search easier.

Loved the integration of so many different story character sets into one tale. The song reference was excellent. Definitely a tune that is easily identified. Overall outstanding. Keep them coming.

Fabulous read. Interesting plot adnd interesting characters. I really liked involving the characters from Jacksonville. What a ride! As an aside, check out the group Duwende's a Capella version of Billie Jean on YouTube - will blow you away.

HOW DO YOU DO THIS? Every week a great story. Every week a long, and great story! My hats off to you.

(Now I will sit back with a beer and enjoy the story, just had to ask how do you do it.)

p.s. Flat Rock plant is in trouble

Shades of a commodor64 .... lol.... where in the world is Carmen San Diego and a great story too.....And ..... Bill Maitland....simply ....outstanding.

But it took too long to get moving for my tastes. I started to read it, until I ran across the mention of Hairyvagina. At that point I put it off for a while. When I started to read it the first 2 pages almost lost me due to the slowness you built up to speed, not like your 'stangs at all.

I did notice a few typos; like on the last page where you mention "...no one photographs her", it looks to me like "photographed" would be better there. The typos, I believe I remember 3, did not detract from the story though. It was well done, with the added effect of incorporating the other authors' characters into yours.

I give you kudos for the effort and look forward to the next offering.

Please try writing a story about someone with a nerdmobile, such as an AMC Pacer. With your talent it could be interesting. I "shutter" to think of the results.

Thanks

PTBzzzz

This was just a really fun read. I'm not sure it was a Loving Wives story since his wife was really a minor character. At first I thought she was going to be part of the deception somehow. But she wasn't and that greatly reduced her importance to the story. She completely gave up on him just when he needed her the most. Plus her fucking around. He was absolutely right, better that he knew now. I'm not sure why she showed up at the second award dinner. There was absolutely no purpose in that. She had to have known by then that Blake was with someone else. Does she like looking like a total loser? <br><br>

But in general, this was just a triumphal story. Blake simply tore his enemies and opponents to pieces. And he did it by being clever, honest, and hard working. He is also delightfully arrogant in his dealing. It was also a object lesson in how the media loves a story and the facts aren't really important. <br><br>

As to the European attitude issue, that may have been a bit overplayed. I can believe a condescending attitude. There are many news stories about one European leader or another lecturing that the US should have done this or that while their own country does little. Often the US is pretty brash in it's actions. Blake's statements were certainly a pie in the face of Gascon. What I find a bit hard to swallow is that Blake's tactics worked. You don't usually get a smug, arrogant person to respect you by insulting them. They usually just dig in to their position further. But it this story it worked. OK. <br><br>

But all in all it was a fast paced and fun ride. Nice work.

Stang, the story overall was great, but the references to the song? Not to mention the other ones to that kid's show? C'mon man...

Other than that, it was really well put together, except for a lack of sex with the new gal. I think all the background was necessary, so the length of the story was fitting. Pretty good job!

Reading as an editor, a critic, a cynic or a putz isn't. I loved this story, the characters, the music, and the lists of great lines. Thanks again for a great ride!

I'm prejudiced about this one because of the entrance of Bill Maitland and the Jacksonville crew, but I can honestly say I would have liked it if they hadn't been involved. "Billie Jean..." with lyrics included. And Maitland and Rehnquist's characters. And a new character who could easily become one of your own iconic figures - Alexander the Great! Has a ring to it. This one had everything going for it - a mystery, romance, criminal intrique, international affairs, big tits and MUSTANGS! I like long, as you could guess, but I honestly don't see how the length could bother anyone because this went down as smoothly as an oyster at a beach party. More than that, I think I liked this one a little more because I really think there is more of a 'darkness' to most of your other pieces. This one just seemed in a lighter, more gentle vein. Finally, I don't know about Rehnquist, but I am flattered and happy with the way you used Maitland and the Jacksonville setting. I find it hard to believe he could have been used in a more realistic or true-to-character fashion than in "Billie Jean." Thank you.

I applaud this story as one of StangStar's best. But still, the anti-European rant was a very ill-advised move that nearly sank the story. I'm a proud American, and sure, some Europeans have issues, but that was a really ham-fisted rant that reminds me of the whole "freedom fries" fiasco from a couple of years ago.

Also, I had some issues with the reveal that the brother was behind this all. In terms of story telling, it was obvious that the mention and details of the brother came late so as to retain some suspense and surprise. But the problem is, if he realized that and didn't tell that to the people he was working with for a while (which was the case), he made their job much harder, and for no good reason (except to create more drama in the story). So that seemed to me to be a cheap writing trick that lessened the quality of the story.

Still, there were enough other good parts to make me still like it despite its flaws. I thought the way the characters from other authors' stories were brought in was especially nice.

Good fun, good plot, now i can't really big titties out of my head... Dammit, got to go surf pictures of Katie Price.

big titties and mustangs two of my favorite things..and mustangs i count big titties twice

I think all non-Americans are used to this attitude by now. It is not just about how the author has spoken about Europe. Look at Obama! Even as the head of state, every time he visits a university his rant on how the youth of America has to save the humanity from being destroyed by low-cost high-skill labor in Asia is a clear indication how America perceives the rest of the world.

During my last visit to the US I was "randomly" selected for a through pat down before boarding each flight. I refuse to believe that all the security personnel were gay and were attracted to my flabby body. That said, I found general population to be very cordial and nice.

StangStar, you have a huge fan following in Europe and Asia, please do not alienate us by acting like a bigot.

Very well done. Without a doubt, this was one of your best stories and certainly one of the best efforts I've seen in the Loving Wives genre for quite some time.

I admit when I first saw the length of the story (12 pages), I was somewhat apprehensive because I've found a lot of the longer stories (or longer single chapters) tend to lose their impact.

But your story was a very gripping read and once I started reading it, there was no way I was stopping until I got to the end. (If anything, I would have liked a bit more detail of the development of the new relationship/love.)

When I think that the story made me like an "ad man" - damn, it must have been good.

A very nice fast moving romp.

I can see how some of the other readers leaving comments came to the conclusion that you may have a slight streak of bigot in you but on the other hand you overdid the whole anti-European and pro-US thing with so much tongue in cheek that even though some of your points were valid it was actually quite funny.

At the end of the day when we are all striped down bare and standing wet and shivering in the snow we are all just the same regardless of origin. Just a small character in the big puppet show called life.

Just Brilliant - Terrific - laughing my ass off here - Well Done !!

Forget about where in the world is Carmen Sandiego, Where in the world is Harry in Va? Great story Stang. Kudos to the new editor. It;s about time someone told you that the gas pedal and the comma key weren't the same thing.

You worked in characters from two of the best writers on this site and made them yours. I stayed up all night reading this, I just couldn't stop. I already knew the people in the story, and I loved it. Keep up the good work. WOW!

And the winner is not Billie Jean as she was not my lover, she just a girl who saw money, and said I was the one. Well thanks to Mr. STANG Det. agency you all can see I was saved, as well as restored. All jokes aside one hell of a story. Loved the length also. Please continue your good work Thurs. hasn't been the same lately. I can't wait until next Thurs., which is the only bad part of your great work (In other words you can't write, or post your work fast enough for your following.) I want to asked have every thought to write multi chapter stories? Or is that the next suprise? I did drop a 5 on this last story as it truly is a page turner. As nobody is perfect MB was wrong Tammy Wynette is who stood by her man, not Ms. Loretta Lynn, but she was under a great strain and we saw how that worked out. Until next Thursday same time, same channel. Just a loyal follower BUICK GS

First of all, I have to point out that I'm a British European, have lived and run a business in France (of all places), for the last twenty years, and the new car that I've just bought is an Audi sports car. No, not an R8, but the next one down. Only a 3.2 litre V6 Quattro, but quite fast enough for me, and surprisingly more fun than the more powerful Jag XK8 I sold to buy it.

So you might understand that I had some difficulties with this one. However, it didn't stop me from thoroughly enjoying an excellent story. It also didn't stop me from taking in what you said about the difference in American and European culture, and strangely in some ways, actually agreeing with much of it. The difference being that it depends from which viewpoint you look at the difference. The brash newcomer, or the experienced old hand? The (fantastic, I happily acknowledge) straight line muscle cars of the USA, or the more sophisticated (and oddly enough, more technically advanced), cars of Europe, actually designed to go round corners, that you don't have many of, like we do. If I or one of my countrymen wrote a story about Americans like this, then there'd be bricks being hurled at computor screens, while 'we' would, for the most part, smile, and perhaps even be a little amused. There's a place, and a need for both fortunately. Incidentally, the idea that the Paris Gendarmerie would stand by and overlook racing flat out in the area you're talking about, is truly artistic

license, so you are forgiven, and I've stayed in hotels all over the world, and the probably the best three are all in Paris.

Anyway, great story Stang. Please forgive me for my little attempt at equalling out the score here, and I will be waiting for next Thursday.

Interesting story, even if pretty fanciful in many places. This is one of those stories where you have to leave your concept of reality far behind, as things happen in a way that is highly unlikely.

I thought that the way our hero reacted to his Wife's suspicions by immediately moving to the spare bedroom and not talking to her as extremely stupid. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face behavior. He knows she has a poisonous sister, yet gives that person all the rope she needs to screw up the marriage. Then, when things go downhill, he immediately falls in love with the big titted woman in Florida, where it must be the water that makes them grow like that.

Not only does he fall in love at first sight, but the object of his infatuation does also. I guess he really didn't love his wife much after all to just roll over and kick her out, when some communication might have gone a long ways towards keeping the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with???

More Mustangs of course, lots of horsepower to go along with the high powered main character in the story. Ahh well, it's just a story.

I rated it as four stars, but that was an error in mouse clicks, as I meant to go with three. Sorry, that my feedback for better or worse.

Stang.

It worked. It really worked. Plus some new Stangs, were driven an editor intro'd and Helen found her hero. All on a Thursday (and Friday).

Thanks for sharing on Lit. Stang. Very much!

x

At the end of the day when we are all striped down bare and standing wet and shivering in the snow we are all just the same regardless of origin. Just a small character in the big puppet show called life.

Thank you for such wonderful, insightful comment.

There were a number of homonym sins (improperly used 'too's, I believe the word sight vs site, and another word I forgot which was incorrect)

But I enjoyed the plot development, it never slowed down. The incredilby vindictive SIL was a bit trite and the you tried a bit hard to tie it to the song.

Overall a very credible story and I thank you for the effort.

Any critiques are mainly to help you burnish a rather good story.

Very good plot development for sure. Entertaining and somewhat realistic, but fantasy is fantasy. I write enough of it myself to understand that. Overall, very enjoyable read. Will have to check out more of your works now too.

Thanks again.

MF

Takes a while to read, but certainly a fun ride! Pulling in the Michael Jackson song and the characters from other authors was very entertaining, and I enjoyed the story very much.

By the way, I wonder if you and/or DQS saw the headline in today's paper. Apparently a woman was found in Florida who only had B-cup breasts. The police captured her, of course--they drove her to the Georgia border, where she was released unharmed. No one had been able to figure out how she got into the state of Florida in the first place.

Thanks, ohio

Takes a while to read, but certainly a fun ride! Pulling in the Michael Jackson song and the characters from other authors was very entertaining, and I enjoyed the story very much.

By the way, I wonder if you and/or DQS saw the headline in today's paper. Apparently a woman was found in Florida who only had B-cup breasts. The police captured her, of course--they drove her to the Georgia border, where she was released unharmed. No one had been able to figure out how she got into the state of Florida in the first place.

Thanks, ohio

An amusing if long romp Stang. Honestly, I'd say it was 3-4 pages too long but it did get me to stay up late reading it.

That said, I wished I'd skipped from about page 3-4 to 11-12 and read the ending. My problem, mentioned by Sidney here in the comments was the husband's reactions. It wasn't totally unbelievable reactions but tough to see how he'd wouldn't pick up on the source of his problems fairly quickly even if he'd forgotten about his bro.

Unless I've screwed up the timeline, why didn't he ever voice to his wife who he thinks is behind it before the sister got involved. At best, you could say he was testing his own wife's love in him long before she went off for idiotic revenge but I don't remember that being even vaguely hinted at.

4/5 Overall I guess. Oh and to the folks whinging about European's hurt feelings, puhlease. And yes there is an EU, and European mindset that generally applies to all in western Europe when it comes to the how they view the USA. The Euros criticize and so does the USA. Such is life.

-Hexxed

I liked everything about this story. I felt a little bad for the wife. She really wasn't a bad person, just weak and gullible. Her sister was the devil who unfortunately for her led her to hell. I really liked the way our hero put the French prick in his place. Everything said to the self important asshole is true. The French should be kissing American ass and thanking us for the opportunity. The pompous ass was shown some pure American spirit. I love mustangs and I appreciate your writing efforts. Thanks- 5 stars

your stories keep getting better and better i cant give you literary critiques, just that i enjoy your writing thanks levi

I though that you should have acknowledged HardaysKnight to. He is the one that masterfully builds stories around songs.

Great job.

This was different and very entertaining. Would the Angel of Death ever be involved in such a small piece of litigation? There was no crime when he was first sucked in, was there? Do many readers spend time trying to remember any characters from other stories? Bill and Deb, as well as Deb's tits, are bigger than life and we all will remember them forever, but I'll be damned if I owuld have made the connection with any others if they had not been pointed out. Maybe my mind is less sharp that the rest of the readers. Worse, I don't give a real shit about tying characters from other stories in like that, except as a brief joke that has to be obvious.

However, regardless of the characters origins, this story had some real humor and was a really good read. I have been to Paris and find some of the references here to have some merit. But, a writer can create a racist character without being racist himself. If he writes about a gay, or a rapist, must the writer be gay or a rapist? Our hero laid down the law as he saw it in the city of lights and it worked for him. Do not make it into more than it is. Of course there are many French people that are not pompous, but the main French dude in this story was. There are American women that do not cheat, but the wife in this story did. Did anyone complain about Stang ridiculing American women? This is fiction. Take it for what it is worth, and this was a very entertaining read. I always loved that song and the way MJ performed it.

On a less humerous note, I want Ohio to know that it was my wife that was removed from Florida today for having a meer B-cup. I do not appreciate him making light of something as serious as small tits in Florida, and I expect an apology.

"But, a writer can create a racist character without being racist himself. If he writes about a gay, or a rapist, must the writer be gay or a rapist?"

Yes, a writer can create a racist character without being racist himself, nor does he have to be gay or a rapist to write about one.

But that is beside the point here.

In this story StangStar overgeneralizes, and makes the reader believe that being an arrogant stuck up snob is linked to nationality, IE being French/European.

HDK, you say that there are American women who do not cheat, but in this story she does, so all American women cheat? If there WAS such a story that said this, would you balk at that? Or say that it's just a story? Did StangStar ever mention that all American women are cheaters? Nope, he didn't.

I have never EVER read a story on LW where cheating is linked to nationality. Simply because that's ridiculous. But for some reason being an arrogant stuck up snob IS linked to nationality, like in this story, that is what I didn't like, and protested against.

I was wondering about that starting comment about "borrowing toys" but this story was great, what your editor does with your sentences should be encouraged. You tend to spout off too much when you should use full stops and other punctuations to enhance the flow and mood. Now give the Angel of Death back so we can get another episode of WWWM and its nice to see Chris and Sarah still doing what they love, each other. Four mustangs in a story? A relative pony show lol Take 10 thumbs up for a great write and a enjoyable read

To HDK, Ohio, DQS1, The Judge and Stang.

Wow, Thanks for a fantastic story and for the cross pollination.

I can only see this as a way for all of you to be inspired to WOW us all with new and exciting insights into Loving wives.

Thanks for a great read.

Thanks

Well time for this part of the little known spot of the peanut gallery to spout off.

First off, well done Starstang!! You have, in my book at least, cemented you your place in the pantheon of great writers. Look at the numbers 77 comments/ 17388 views/ 19 favorites a rating of 4.72 in two days. Well done.

You even draw out HDK from his ultra top secret hiding spot enough to comment! (If only you could force him to write!!)

Well let me say that it took two days and 2 New Glarus Naked and 2 Fat Squirrel beers this time. But it was well worth it. You have crafted a fine story that is long without it being pointless fluff. Many people will write long stories that are just fluffed out short stories this was different. Each part was need and locked into the other parts. I will let the rest regale you all the details suffice it for me to say “I true enjoyed it and actually read each and every word, many of them three or four times looking for little twists. Thank you.”

But one small thing that always makes me wonder, what about that guy in the mailroom. You might see him without even seeing him. When his wife cheats on him and he does not have $30 million, a supper PI, and never took a martial arts class what does he do? He doesn’t stand 6’3” just 5’7” cannot do 100 knuckle pushups with two people standing on his back. His magnetism can’t draw a lint ball let alone a crowd of people. He’s not fat but is out of shape. He drives a rusted out Mustang II. We never hear about him. Who does he turn too?

I Liked the part about the French and 400 years ago! !David from Germany

This author has really improved his writing, confirming that practice makes perfect. And the quips and japes were fun, starting with the inclusion of Bill Maitland (for those of us who hunger for more DQS1 chapters of WWWM). But my only criticism was the lack of eroticism. Don't get me wrong, the story was very entertaining, but it just lacked the "Literotica" theme that is usually the prime directive. Maybe a warning at the beginning, "There is little or no sex in this story," would have been helpful. Thanks for writing.

I am impresed that you wrote this story in a short time.

I am not impressed with the under use of commas and other, proper punctuation. Punctuation marks are meant to allow the reader to understand text as the author intended: to shape the flow and timing of the written word as it would be if spoken. Speech is a far more complex and rich symbolic communication than text; speech in person adds the dimensions of gestures, body language, and facial expression. Proper punctuation and paragraphing are symbols, no less than words, gestures, body language, facial expression, intonation and timing.

You are an artist!! Use all of the colors on your palette, and all of the canvass, to carry your intended meaning to your audience.

I loved the cross over with DQS1 well done!

I enjoyed reading this! I think it has potential to be lengthened into a full length novel. Think about it. Thanks for sharing.

You write a generally good story. But you do come across as an asshole and a fucking racist cunt.

Pay out on the Europeans? You're the fucking reason you yokel yanky cunts are hated everywhere else in the world.

Have a rant at the French? I don't particularly like them myself, but why get so fucking uppity over them?

So much of this story was likeable, but you fucked it with the anti-Euro stuff. Fucking Fords indeed. Everyone know Chevy's are better in every way anyway....

This is one of the worst stories I've ever seen posted on literotica. It just babbles on and on. Is it supposed to be set in some weird parallel universe? Why would the press give a shit if a woman claimed an advertizing exec had an affair with her? That wouldn't even make the news. Some of the reviewers have suggested this was intended as satire. If bad writing qualifies as satire, then maybe it is satire. I guess there must be a lot of satire on this site. This has an average score of over 4.7, in the LW section??? I have no idea what you guys were thinking about when you voted. It sure couldn't have been this crappy story. I could name at least 100 MUCH better stories on this site that have scores less than 4.5. 1/5

Is that even though I loved many aspects of your story, as a previous reader commented, I find your incredibly pointless attack on the French disturbing. What the hell did any of that have to do with your story?! It pissed me off! And you're making us look like fucking trailer trash, you idiot! Do you have the faintest idea what the rest of the world (civilians mostly) suffered, French included, during WWII??? You embarrassed me and likely a whole lot of others with your pathetic tirade. Spoken like a truly ignorant motherfucker.

But that doesn't have a lot more to do with Literotica anyway, so I'll over look your monumental idiocy there, because all I have to do in the future is just not read any more of your stories. However, the thing that concerns me the most, is the support you've received in this story from other authors that I really liked. DSQ1 etc, etc... Unfortunately, I won't be reading their stories in the future either.

And since when where advertising executives treated like rock stars??? For fuck's sake try to make it a little believable, will you?

"And since when where advertising executives treated like rock stars??? For fuck's sake try to make it a little believable, will you?"

I mean, if a high up bean counter from the Hauge got caught playing 'hide the salami' with a chamber maid, no one would care, right?

What I love the most about my favorite writers is if I fall in love with a character, I know I'll eventually see that character again. I love how you introduced Tyler and Marissa Collins in this story along with Chris and Sarah Harris. Hopefully, you'll keep doing writing these wonderfully humorous tales of dumb, vain women and the smart men who dump them.

A bit long in the making, but generally one hell of a good story. I like the way you work in characters of your other (mainly good to excellent) stories.

Don't let comments about European/US Americans fool you: you are dead right. That's the way most Europeans look at Americans: they get in, get the cheastnuts out of the fire and get shit instead of thanks for it. (I know: I've lived in European countries for most of my life.)

Long sure but engaging all the way to the end - I really did enjoy the read.

Occasional tense and perspective issues with the writing like it was translated strangely or not proof read well -

Below it ought to be photographED her, noticeD, waveD, walkED - this was all portrayed as in the simple past tense in the story line.

and none of them photographs her. I notice a single tear slide down her cheek ruining her make-up as Helena and I walk by her. Helena and I both wave to her, but she turns and runs away.

Thank you very much

What more needs to be said?

This was an enjoyable experience in reading a story that covered many interesting aspects of life and not just sex. Once I started, I was hooked and read it to the end. Thanks for the ride and hope you write more and not just for Literotica. I shall be looking forward to your next ...... in whatever format or medium. Just point the way.

One of your best !

Montgomery Burns as his lawyer...eeeexcellent. 5 stars.

His writing and all aspects of his story,especially his incomparable sense of humor is well above anything I have read on Lit. Thank you Stang,for a most enjoyable story of all time.

Some things are just way over the top such as the kidnapping by Cam and his two buddies. And certainly he would not get all the publicity as being the top advertiser. It is not like $4 million a year will get anyone noticed, nor is he a movie star, politician, or sports star.

Regardless, the story was very good and worth the 5***** rating I gave it.

off the page you go moron

off the page you go moron

buh bye

buh bye