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All Comments on 'Birthday Present'

by hryan

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  • 4 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousabout 10 years ago
It was a good story

It was an interesting read and will look for mire of your work

AnonymousAnonymousabout 10 years ago
You REALLY need and EDITOR.

The story shows promise, but before you possibly add another chapter, please get a good editor. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, get a GOOD editor.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 10 years ago
Chill out

Its a good sex story. That's it. Why we expecting a work of art

gordo12gordo12over 8 years ago
Writing aside

There are a lot of rudimentary spelling mistakes. You need to improve your vocabulary and get some editing done.

Anonymous
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