All Comments on 'Blackmail (WIP - Feedback Needed)'

I was just getting into it and it stopped, PLEEEEEASE continue, you don't need feedback, you're great.

Keep it up. Take her through the paces.

great start. write more longer chapters. I plan on jerking off and imagining that it is my wife being blackmailed. I would love that.

keep the story going

always like a good black mail story

Choose one or the other, c'est vous plais

Blackmail stories are all the same. The victim does something stupid, is caught by the blackmailer, and does something infinitely more stupid - complies with the blackmailer's demands.

Just once I would like to see an author make a effort have the victim turn the tables

On the other hand the sex is satisfyingly nasty, if that's what you're into

keep going ----------we like your creative ideas

Love the beginning. A little cliche with the cheating and getting caught, but still works - could have used a little more WHY she cheated and how it began than just jumping in with "so I had an affair." Is she a good girl who got seduced or already a slut who sought out another man...? Those details set up the turn better.

Going forward, I'd suggest you expand on your sessions ... a lot. You went through several sessions in one page. I barely know how she feels about them. Look at the story "Going Too Far" by Confi. While it's a different genre, a single sex session covers 5-7 pages. You really get into her head. And sometimes it's good to get a restatement of the situation: "Here I am, manager of an entire team of men, giving them orders and handing out tasks everyday. But right now I'm naked on my knees under the desk of the most obnoxious one of them, pleasing his cock while he ridicules me and undermines me to the rest of the staff. And I just have to listen to their humiliating comments and try to be quiet so they won't learn just how far their boss has fallen."

Second suggestion is don't make her accept it. I personally am disappointed when a good blackmail story turns into just a slut story. Jessica's Change Management is an example of this. She begins to not only tolerate her bimbo role, but pushes to become an even greater one. To me the humiliation is diminished when she actively begins to accept the role and almost relishes it. She should hate it and be reluctant (somewhat) every time. Let her body pull her mind into enjoying it while it is happening, but return the guilt and shame and anger between. Draw the humiliation out as long as possible and squeeze every ounce you can. Have her relive the shame and degradation of the first time she had to remove her panties in front of her blackmailer, even on the 4th or 5th time.

They say don't rewrite the same steps or tasks in multiple separate sessions, but that's not entirely true if you're able to revisit some of the persistent themes (humiliation, shame, guilt, arousal,etc) from a new angle: "It's not like I haven't been under his desk before. I've spent hours under here, slowly sucking his cock while he works and chats with people we both work with. After a couple weeks, one day I noticed while he was working, he started to get somewhat soft. I realized with utter shame that I felt embarrassed by that!. Like having his hot boss under his desk sucking his cock wasn't good enough. Like maybe I was doing it poorly. Feeling bad only made me feel worse. Then realizing that I had subconsciously began to suck a little harder and bob my head a little faster made me feel even more like a whore. What's worse is that when he is making fun of me to his team members, he stays rock hard and I don't have to work as hard. That combined with those infernal eggs he put in my cunt, and I find myself looking forward - and my cunt drooling - to one of the guys coming by so my own subordinates can make fun of me. What is wrong with me!?!"

Look forward to more.