Bless the Broken Road Ch. 06

Bless the Broken Road

Chapter 6

This chapter was supposed to be the final chapter. My intention was to tie up all the loose ends here because I didn't want anyone's closure anxiety on my conscience. However, the chapter was going to be way too long. There will be a Chapter 7 and hopefully it won't take anywhere near as long to write. My absence was un-planned, and I apologize for leaving this story hang open for so long. I received a lot of feedback during my absence from readers wanting more and that was a huge incentive for me to continue. I can't say thank you enough to my editors. They were a big help in making this a much better read. First, BelleLindsay, who stuck by my side the entire time and knew when to be a cheerleader and when I needed to be kicked in the ass. Secondly, Darker Binding, who likely didn't know how high the flames were before jumping in to help. Thank you both for your help.

Maddie looked down at Rob and she could see the pain, the anguish, and the sadness in his face and felt he was deeply hurt by what he had done. Rob reached out his hand for her and when she took it, he pulled her down to him and wrapped her in a bear hug. Tearing up as she felt him trembling, she put her arms around him, and they held each other for a few minutes until both calmed down.

"I have a lot of shit I have to fix. Any suggestions?" he asked.

"I think Jessie will need a day or two to process what happened. But she loves you and I'm sure she will see things more clearly after thinking this through."

"I hope so. Maddie, I need your help," Rob said. "I need you to get me out of here. I'm not asking you to do anything illegal or that would jeopardize your practice... just go through the proper channels and work your magic. I need to get away from this, all of this, for a while. I'm nearing the end of my rope."

Maddie looked into his eyes to gauge that for herself and she could see he was telling the truth. She knew his brain had to assimilate the present reality and rationalize the things he had at one time blocked out, but were now out in the open.

"Can you see about calling off any more testing until I have a chance to wrap my head around all this?" Rob asked quietly.

"Absolutely Bobby. Also, I'll see what I can do to keep you out of trouble for what happened in your room. They may not be very forgiving. I'm worried they might try to ship you off to the psych ward until they feel comfortable that you're not going to endanger anyone."

Rob thought for a moment. "Tell them I saw a mouse in my room. If they want to play hardball, then we'll see what an extermination inspection of the entire hospital will cost them. I'm willing to forget if they are," he quipped.

Maddie laughed a tiny bit. "Okay. Let's hope that makes them think twice."

"Wait. I'll handle the bed. But the hole in the wall I can't do anything about." Thinking quickly, he said, "Tell them I have an irrational fear of stink bugs. Will that make things easier?"

"I'm sure it will. I can't see them shipping you off to the cuckoo's nest for a little Entomophobia."

"A little what?"

"Entomophobia... fear of insects or bugs."

"I might have a touch of that actually. If you saw some of the things crawling around in Iraq, or didn't check your sleeping area before laying down, you'd develop a phobia really quickly."

As Maddie began to unwrap her arms, Rob said, "Listen, don't worry. I wouldn't have been around for all of this to happen if it weren't for you. I would have self-destructed long ago and never met the woman I love. She might still be trapped with her husband if I wasn't on that road. You saved us both. Not too shabby for a therapist that didn't feel she had what it took. I knew you did. That's why you have all the free passes with me that you could ever need."

"Thank you, Bobby. That means a lot," she said as she gave him one more hug.

"Are there any more surprising secrets about my life that I don't remember?"

Maddie wasn't sure she should venture into that at the moment. But at the same time, she couldn't help but take the opportunity to have a better grasp on his mental status. Her curiosity got the better of her. "Do you know why you ended up here in a coma?"

"Honestly, I haven't had much time to wonder about that. At first, you know, I thought it was an injury while I was in Iraq. But the process of getting some memories back hasn't left me time to wonder. So, the answer is no. I don't remember what happened."

"Okay. We'll try to work on that," she said.

"Okay? That's it? You ask me that and then leave me hanging and don't tell me?"

"Do you think it is a good idea to explore that issue so soon after seeing that mouse?" Maddie asked.

"Oh. Uh... that bad huh?"

"Well, it was bad at the time, but it turned out okay. Well, relatively okay... eventually. Don't worry. It's not as bad as it sounds."

"That's about as clear as mud. But I trust you," he said.

When Maddie left, she headed for Dr. Fisher's office. Rob settled down to sort through his thoughts. He reasoned the best way to approach the Jessie/Aimee issue was to remove the emotion attached to everything and look at it analytically. Fat chance that it was going to work but what Maddie said rang true enough. He had a chance to start over. He wanted to make sure he was making the right decision. And if he thought it felt right, he reasoned he could be happy with that.

Laying down seemed to be a good starting point so he looked over the bed to figure out the best route to take in turning it back over. When he had a plan in place and started to move the bed, the first thought in his mind was that this had been a whole lot easier on adrenaline. The very next thought was where the hell was Hoss when he needed him?

He struggled but got the bed back on its wheels. After making sure it rolled and the side rails seemed to work properly, he took a break, deciding that he needed to spend more time in the gym. It was somewhat embarrassing how much trouble he had in simply turning over a bed.

Once he laid down, he tried to clear his mind. Whatever popped in there first was going to be the most important thing to deal with. With his eyes closed, the first thing he saw was Jessie's face, smiling but almost like a smirk, with one side of her mouth turned up in her usual 'what am I going to do with you' look. Rob smiled at that. Not only because he hadn't seen it in what seemed forever, but also because she did it often with him. And the reasons why she did it often caused him to smile. The way a woman doesn't quite understand a man, but she puts up with him anyway.

He loved Jessie; more than he thought he could express in words. He loved Jaime and Greg. He loved that it felt like they were a family when they were together. He knew he wanted a family, wanted to be a dad. It didn't matter that it was a readymade family with Jessie. He loved the kids as if they were his own. He would like to have kids of his own someday. He and Jessie had talked about it briefly early on and she seemed receptive to having some more.

Then his thoughts turned to Aimee. Aimee was different than Jessie in several ways. What initially drew him to her was her similarity to Lisa. She was a beautiful and caring woman with a great personality. He could have fallen in love with her, but he wasn't in love with her... he was in love with Jessie. He now had the answer that he was searching for. He just hoped that what he'd done hadn't hurt Jessie to the point that she didn't love him any longer.

He needed to talk to Aimee and try to fix the situation with her and then talk to Jessie and hopefully mend things with her too.

*****

Dr. Fisher was not in her office so Maddie texted her that they needed to meet and then waited until she arrived.

"If you don't have any good news, at least tell me it isn't bad news," Karen said as she walked into her office.

"It's a little of both. Bobby just found out who Jessie is to him. It happened in about the worst way that you could think possible. He is at his wit's end and he needs a break. He wants to leave the hospital and after talking with him, I have to agree with that," Maddie said.

"He's not ready to leave. We haven't completed his mental evaluation. I would like to make sure that his memory is intact as much as possible and that he has recovered as much as he can of his major life events so that he doesn't have the adverse reactions such as some of the ones we have seen so far. It's better for him to deal with that in a controlled environment than out in public."

"I agree with that and that would work for most patients. But not with Bobby. He's a combat vet that has difficulty dealing with confinement. He needs the freedom of being able to leave a high-stress environment to deal with things in his own way and process the situation. He has a strong dislike for hospitals going back to his days in Iraq and right now, he is feeling like a caged, wild animal. You can see it in his eyes."

"I can understand and sympathize with that. But he hasn't finished PT yet either. They still need to sign off on him. And again, I have worries about how he will react when any other significant memories return."

"I believe the biggest hurdle we have left to deal with is Bobby learning how and why he was injured. I asked him if he knew why he had been in a coma and he said he didn't remember. Since the outcome of that would not be extensively negative in his view, I don't think it will trigger a bad reaction. At least not like we have dealt with in the past. He knows who Jessie is. I think what remains for him could be dealt with in an intensive outpatient therapy program. As far as PT is concerned, I think he has gone about as far with that as is necessary," Maddie said, trailing off at the end to make it appear less important.

"Why do you say that?" Karen asked.

Maddie wasn't sure how to phrase this in a way that wouldn't paint the situation in a bad light for Bobby. Now, it was do-or-die, and she hoped she could craft the wording in the best way possible.

"He was frustrated with the way that Jessie's identity was kept from him. She is an especially important aspect of his life and... well... he reacted probably the way you'd expect. He was upset and needed to vent his frustration. Someone needs to have a few guys from housekeeping or maintenance go to his room."

"What happened?"

"The drywall damage is minimal but I'm sure Bobby can take care of rearranging the furniture back to its proper location"

Dr. Fisher's expression was not one of intense shock at least. Patients damaging the hospital is not that rare but always a cause of concern. However, it was the anger and aggression she was wanting to keep in check in a controlled environment. As she thought a bit more, she realized that given the importance of what he learned, his response was not overly excessive and could have been a lot worse. Perhaps he had handled it in a better manner than she would have anticipated from him.

"Let me think about this a bit and weigh the options. You've presented a sensible and logical case on his behalf and I need to examine his entire case and meet with him before I make a decision."

"Thank you, Karen. I appreciate your time and consideration of this." Maddie left the office feeling good about Bobby's situation for the first time in a long time.

*****

When Jessie got home, she wanted to talk with Annette, needing to talk with someone. She told Annette what happened in Rob's room and felt that what she brought up in her argument with Aimee likely triggered him into remembering things. He had said her name and that he remembered her, which she was so elated to hear, she rushed to him and hugged him. That is when he said he needed Maddie. She told Annette she was relieved that Rob acknowledged her and remembered but he seemed a bit confused, maybe even sad.

Jessie admitted being furious with Aimee because she tried to take advantage of Rob and steal him away. Even though she knew Rob didn't remember her, she couldn't get past feeling like he had somehow cheated on her. He liked, and had fallen for, another woman, which is the essence of cheating.

Annette was quiet for a moment as she thought about what Jessie had said. "Jessie, you had the advantage of knowing everything. He didn't have that. He only knew what he could remember. He only had a part of the truth. I honestly believe that he didn't do this on purpose, and intent plays a major role in cheating. Try to look at it from his point of view and ask yourself, how could he purposefully cheat on someone he didn't know existed?"

"I understand why you feel the way that you do. It's easy to feel cheated on when the one you love is looking at someone else the way they used to look at you. But he didn't remember you to remember that he looked at you that way."

"You know him better than I do. Do you believe that he is the type of man that would do this? I don't. That behavior, that type of thinking, to cheat or not, is something that is deep and ingrained in a person. From the information I've heard about his recovery and situation, I don't believe that his injuries were enough to change that in him. You need to decide for yourself if he did this intentionally or not. And then decide what you do with that decision."

Jessie sat quietly as she went over and over what Annette had said. She felt positive that the Rob she knew would not do what he did. But because of his trauma, is he the Rob he used to be and that she remembered? Or is he someone else now? She kept finding herself drifting back to the issue of Rob having feelings for Aimee while he was supposed to be loving her. Jessie realized it was jealousy.

Her anger wasn't so much that Rob did what he did when not remembering her. It was that she was jealous and that made it her issue, not Rob's. When that thought made its way through her mind, she felt she knew what she needed to do. But first, she needed to call and speak with Maddie.

"You knew, didn't you?" Jessie asked Maddie.

"No. Not for sure. I was in his room when Aimee came in on her rounds. What I saw, while not overtly a giveaway, just made me very uneasy and suspicious. Right after that is when I told you that you needed to speak with him."

"Why didn't you tell me what you saw and about your suspicion?"

"It could have made things worse. You two needed to be on even footing. If you went in there feeling like he was cheating on you, you would have phrased things differently, even accusingly. If he picked up on that, he would likely get defensive, and... it probably would have turned out badly. It was best you didn't know."

"Dammit, Maddie! When you put it that way, I see your point. How am I supposed to get upset with you when you have all this stuff already thought through?" Jessie laughed a little bit.

"Well, I can tell you that Bobby is really upset about this. He is beating himself up hard and he is worried sick that he has hurt you to the point that you don't love him any longer. I know you need time to go through this but don't take too long. For both of you. Okay?"

"Thank you for all your help. Yes, I do need to process this, but I dearly love him even if he is an idiot sometimes. I'll talk to him as soon as I feel up to it."

When Jessie hung up, she began to wonder what was going through Rob's head. She knew she loved him, but she was worried about how he felt about her even though Maddie had just told her. And what if he picked Aimee? It was always a possibility, but she didn't think that would be the case. At least she hoped it wouldn't. She was determined to spend all her time and energy making Rob forget he ever knew Aimee.

*****

Rob was woken up by someone moving around in his room. Thinking it was Aimee, he quickly opened his eyes and looked around, only to see an unfamiliar nurse.

"Morning," Rob said.

The nurse turned quickly to Rob. "Oh. Hi Mr. Martin! It's fantastic to see you awake. How are you doing?"

"So-so at the moment." Rob looked up at the whiteboard and saw the name Chelsea in the spot where Aimee's name had always been. "When will Aimee be coming in? I thought she worked today."

"Aimee's taken a leave of absence for a while. They brought me back to cover for her until they can find a more permanent replacement."

"WHAT? What do you mean a leave? How long will she be gone?" Rob asked in a panic.

"I have no idea. I'll be here for a couple of days until they decide what to do." Chelsea could see the confusion and concern on his face.

"I have something important to talk to her about and I was hoping to do that today. Can you get a message to her?"

Chelsea had no idea what could be so urgent that a patient would need to speak with their nurse, but she could tell that it was important to him.

"I can try. Do you need to write something down?"

"No. Just tell her that I really need to talk to her. She knows what it's about."

"I'll see what I can do." When Chelsea left, Rob was fighting with the scenarios in his head. Aimee was so hurt; she couldn't bring herself to even see him. She had taken time off work either to avoid him or else emotionally she couldn't deal with what happened. He needed to fix this right now!

Rob hadn't heard from Chelsea by shift change so when Katie came to his room, he tried her.

"I've spoken to her. She isn't coming in. At least not right now. She needs time for herself for a while," Katie said.

"Dammit! I really need to talk to her. I had no idea about all of this, and I know she's hurt. I feel guilty. I'm responsible.

"Mr. Martin, I don't think she blames you for anything. It's an unfortunate circumstance that no one saw coming. Give her some time. I'm sure she will be back when she's ready."

*****

Maddie stopped by in the early evening to see Rob. She was hoping he was still in his room.

"Maddie! I need a big favor. I need to get a message to my friend Hoss. My phone is long gone I guess, and I don't remember his number. I need to talk to him as soon as possible."

"I have his number. We all exchanged information, in the beginning, to keep everyone in the loop."

"Can you contact him and tell him to get in here ASAP?"

"Sure. Is everything okay?"

"I hope it will be shortly." Rob saw the concern on Maddie's face. "Hey... everything is fine. I just need Hoss to do something for me quickly. That's all. No worries."

Maddie called Hoss and asked him to come to the hospital as soon as he could. It was very important.

When Hoss stopped in, it was a joyful reunion. Rob was happy to see Hoss and vice versa.

"What's up brother? Maddie sounded anxious on the phone."

"Yeah, I need your help. But first, how have you been? Long time no see... I guess. And by the way, you weren't planning on having some pothole-strewn section of road or a dilapidated bridge named after me, were you?

"Jesus LT, is that what you think of me? I thought we were closer than that. Besides, the first requirement that needs to be met when naming highway infrastructure after dead service members, is that you are, in fact, dead. Preferably killed gloriously in battle but they will accept an accident on active duty as long as it's in a hot zone. You already flunked that part. They will even consider if you die later subsequent to your wounds as long as you don't take too long to do it. There's an expiration date on that. And I doubt they would ever consider death from batting practice as a legitimate qualification."

Rob looked at Hoss with some confusion evident on his face. Hoss wasn't sure why it was there and hoped he hadn't just fucked up somehow. He pushed ahead hoping to avoid a potential issue.

"And of course, there is the issue of the discrepancy of your rank."