All Comments on 'Blue Topaz Eyes'

Rereading - great story.

My only criticism - when we're first told of Emma's injuries we heard that she'd lost the bottom part of her right leg but when we get to her hospital room we hear about what remains of her left leg.

I did not honk you could pull off a satisfying story in two pages after the detailed start but you did. Great writing!

And and again a 5…..

Wonderful story, a bit less elaborate and very sweet. Nice!

Kinda sketchy in places, but still an excellent piece of writing

Looking forward to the next part

Five stars.

JPB

Sometimes a hard life is poverty without education, however since extreme wealth, power, and influence can be an albatross hanging on a bowed neck, especially when forced to strive with very high expectations. Since it so rare except with some rare stories of 'poor little rich kids' that such situations are mythical to commoners like myself. (Emotional damage, alienation, distrust, and loneliness?)

Great story - very well fleshed out characters and good governmental policy explanation. Kept reader intrigued and interested from beginning to end. Great author

Decent story.

Lovely story.

Very confusing.

Am also amused by commenters that use a pen name, then complain about anonymous comments.

As usual, even the second or third reading, your stories lead down a path that it always entertaining and wonderful. 5 stars

Wow- a true Goldilocks story- not too long, not too short but just right. Great author! Can’t wait to read more

I would have loved a bit more "flesh" on the story, but love it none the less! Thank you!

Who is this guy? I did not see a name but married Emma and they have a daughter. DerMTMan

Although many Loving Wives story resort to the previously-unknown-of child plot, this is one of the few to even acknowledge the husband being deprived of his child's early developmental years. Hats off to the authors!

Top author. Top story. Top writing.

Straight forward narration as in Jack Webbs, "... just the facts, ma'am...". Could have padded more details and descriptions (a 'woman's touch?) Very macho love story. Dedicated civil servants.

So sad that they lost five years, but it worked out well in the end.

This is the Bestis story of yours.so good. J.A.C. Thank you telling it.

Really well written, moving on to the next chapter.

Wonderful tale. Thanks.

Wow, Terrific tale.This is my favorite author. LP

Absolutely wonderful!

@muskyboy and @nitpik Emma’s father is The Reinhardt a man of unlimited wealth and influence and As Emma is his only child and heir he is kept well informed of everything she does

What was the relationship with Monica, Cathy and Emma????? How did the parents even know she had a daughter? When was Elle conceived? So many holes and gaps, very unlike you. Good story line but too many holes....

5 Stars.

I didn't believe it was only 2 pages. Not because it dragged, but because you filled in the characters so well.

Your stories are brilliant and riveting. I virtually never leave a comment (just vote) but I am so impressed with the quality of your writing that I had to speak up.

Please excuse the "Anonymous" posting - 20 years in the military has made being a very private person instinctual.

Great read.

How did her parents know she had a daughter?.

Absolutely Perfect, I wouldn’t change a thing. Previous comments recommend subtle editorial changes as to the who is who, on reflection the " Triggers in your writing Style " allow - us - the reader to pick up The what, how and why In your stories, and I for one, Find myself immersing into the drama and thoroughly enjoy It. Bravo Bravo Bravo

Great short read. A little editing and it's near perfect. Exuded, not excluded. Define LEOs the first usage. Not very clear who called him to Walter Reed, details like that. Keep writing.You have real talent

Your two-page stories (Literotica mega-pages of course) are gems, finely cut and full-faceted gems. You pack more (and better) narrative, character development, and plot into two pages than any other author on this site. I for one am perfectly satisfied with the gem you have created. But even with that said, I am delighted at the prospect of the part 2 you have favored us with.

Bravo! 5 stars! Superlative!

Another good story from Todd, he doesn't write bad stories but some are better than others. Always good for rereads and appreciation, beats the hell out of modern day movies and TV.

POOR way to end the tale. A good tale though, and needs more. LP

You have a rare talent, sir. Thank you for reminding me what really good stories read like.

Helluva way to end the story, left us hanging. there shoulda been more.

many characters with similar names!

Great story, and that covers it completely.

I hate you. You made me cry again.

Great story. As always.

2nd time around and still great.

For those who want to throw their money at todd here is a comment that he put in a place where very few would read it.

We have novelized the first three Needles and Delaney stories into an ebook on Amazon, titled, originally enough as "Needles and Delaney." We did that partly because so many have asked us to, partly because it was just something new to do, and partly as to protect the work - there are people who skim sites for stories then publish them as ebooks under false names. Some of the real heavy hitters here have had that happen to them.

Doc Spirit 3

A Classic among many. Still a Favorite.

Thanks for sharing your hard work with us on Lit.

x

Another great tale!

A little confused, but then being on a beed to know basis keeps everything in perspective...well somewhat in

Just my second read. Still very good. Damn, I need to do some vacuuming before the better half gets home, but I'm going for part two instead.

terrible american english

I just keep reading them over and over and over! Wish I could keep voting.

Very good.

Lovely story just a tad too short is my only criticism. Would’ve liked to share more time with your wonderful characters.

Scores 5/5

You can call me an airhead because I don't remember details of stories very long. I do remember the names of stories that are very, very good. The benefit to having short memory is that I get to read the good ones again and enjoy them almost as much as the first reading. This one, along with most of stories by Todd172 are very good. 5* all the way.

One of the most beautiful stories I have ever read

This explains a lot from the story with Ken and Evelyn starring...

But I became ashamed of myself when I started criticizing other's hard work. If you are going to bitch, at least sign a name to it. But in this case, great story 5+ stars.

One should read Blue Topaz Eyes Ch. 02 for full story.

At least the fourth time reading this.

Apparently reading comprehension isn't high on some annony's list of skills.

Love The Story As Told. This could be a series like the shack.

I'm sure I'm not the first to point this out but when we're first told that Emma has lost part of her leg etc it's her right leg and hand. But when they go into her room it's the left.

She has a lesbian relationship, wants her career, so fucks some guy to get the trifecta, a kid. Her career goes sideways, her parents want control of the kid, so she gets the poor guy to save her situation. All i can say is it makes me want to puke.

Time to re-read the shack series.

She steals his daughters entire childhood from him, and steal five years of her daughters life - and no one cares?

The story made it clear he wanted marriage and out and SHE wanted to continue her career, so why in the end is it billed as her protecting his career?

If she couldn't afford the danger of meeting him, an agent trained to deal with danger, every now and again, how the fuck did she manage to be a full time mother to a child while working undercover?

I really enjoy your work!

An aside, first, if I may. Please “davyup”, go back to your X-BOX games and stay off the grown-up websites. As for the story: I thought it was outstanding. I wish there was more of it. I certainly will be reading Emma’s story, but I just felt like this part of the story ended sooner than I would have liked. Maybe I’m just greedy. Oh, one more thing. I think this story would have fit very well in the ‘Romance’ section too. Because that’s kinda what it felt like to me, a great romance with a little tragedy thrown in. Regardless, great story.

I read this story and found it captivating. I liked the style and the personnel! I plan to read on and enjoy!

i LOVE YOUR WRITING, PLEASE, PLEASE DON'T STOP

I can’t even read this trash. You’re talking all billy bad ass. I would have ripped your heart out through your mouth, shoved a knife up through your scull, put two shots in your chest and one in your forehead after castrating you and stuffed you’re mouth. You write stuff of what you are clueless of.

You’re good. Love your work. Almost feels like I’m cheating reading this on a free site. Thanks and keep them coming.

Good story, my second of your, out of sequence, of course.

I love the premise, love your storyline, the plot is a stretch but it's actually believable.

Thank you for bringing love into the relationship and I'm glad they finally got together. Ellie is a surprise, but love is what is going to heal Emma. It seems it also brought Evelyn into their lives, but in her own way.

Love is a good thing. Thank you!

It made a lot of sense for the group to stay together. After all the disfunction having people close that you love is obvious.

A little too fairy tale-ish ending. I've been reading the Shack stories. So far this one has disappointed me most. Especially the part where even Cathy and Monica get their house on the property.

A new star has arisen in the Literotica universe. I will wallow in these stories for some time to come.

I started reading this after I read the Harpy and then as the author suggested in his bio to start with this of all his stories linked together, so here I go.. 5

I started this journey near the end and was so intrigued that I am moving to the beginning. I am looking forward to some delightful reading

It introduces characters, establishes a storyline, and brings into existence a new universe with many tales to follow.

Enjoy. Just look at the stories submitted by the author and take your cue from the date submitted.

just enough.

re the Saturday v Sunday kerfuffle. Grandma was told, if she wanted to visit she had to call first, so she called every Saturday in order to be able to come over on Sunday. lol

very VERY well done

I disagree with those wanting more.

This was an excellent stand alone.

We don't need to know what happened in Turkey, the very well written just enough background of hers let us know exactly what her mindset and ambition was.

As a father, I absolutely hated that he missed the child's first 5 years. This "takes a village" bullshit, is just that.. it doesn't take a fucking village, it takes a father!

and mother (unless of course there are legitimate reasons) but ambition is NOT a good excuse for such a selfish and deplorable negligence of telling the father and allowing him to be a father.

I see my next "fix" is already here with Ch. 02. Very well done...top notch story...really like the way you write...and especially WHAT you write!

This is quality story albeit with some stretches of vagueries. I thank the author for sharing.

But I would have enjoyed a

few more chapters with these

two characters. Well done.

your clean, spare style is most excellent, it makes re-reads even more rewarding. thanks!

So glad you decided to stop by and start writing here. You have a real talent!

but as a color it does make for attractive eyes. TK U MLJ LV NV

Anyone made it through the first stupid page.

YGBSM

1

PS you forgot about them making it so realistic the chick is allowed to shoot her attacker.

I'm not too sure what else I can say.

Nuf said. Can't add to what I assume are 70+ very positive comments. Now I get the pleasure of reading Emma's tale. Thank you for submitting a real gem in the sewage treatment plant that LW has become lately.

In fact, an inside the park home run: Unusual and very exciting.

5 stars.

In terms of writing - probably a little too concise and abrupt with the transitions, but not really a problem. In terms of plot - wow. Tremendous character development in only two pages. The scene when he first met his daughter was very moving but so subtle I had to read it three times to understand who the rainbow skirt was and how she fit in. Five stars because they don't have six.

Three things and then:

1. I'm a long winded overly wordy kind of guy who likes the back story as much as the overall theme and plot, but I didn't miss anything here. Loved it!

2. Nowadays there seems to be a fascination with highly skilled over trained men and women of steel who spend their lives in covert operations. Me, I'm meat and potatoes; guy works at a warehouse, wife's a Walmart type. Just the same this was fascinating.

3. Most LW readers are looking for the infidelity/adultery theme with the usual rising suspicion, discovery, denial, heartache, and eventual resolution. I'm really sick of it; this was an LW. They are what we want them to be.

And then you mentioned Bogart in a comment. Funny about that; for me it did evolve into his voice, and Lauren Bacall slipped right into Emma's role. No not good job here, a great job!

"We had it all, just like Bogie and Bacall..."

Five is all we can give.

Jedd Clampett+

Just a wonderful story. Thank you for posting this.

"Well, except for the rich asshole father. Who cares what happened to him?" - Given your apparent anger you must think that the "rich asshole father" is Ellie's father.

Our hero is her father, the rich asshole is EMMA'S father, and you're right, who cares what happened to him?!

Its where you end up that counts, and they all lived happily ever after. Well, except for the rich asshole father. Who cares what happened to him?

... Even though this story was a little lacking on certain details, it was a truly "brilliant" first effort.

And the loss would have been mine.

This is your debut? Damn!!!

Fast paced, had me from the start.

Your characters were consistent throughout the story, which is why I was able to accept the man's controlled reaction to finding out he has a daughter.

There were a few technical errors, but others have covered those.

You are definitely someone to look out for.

Thank you for writing.

An inattention to your own details mistake was when you had him place Ellie on Emma's RIGHT side, since that's the side that was all torn up from the car bombing.

For my money, Emma is a boneheaded woman who cost herself and him six years of their lives that could and should have been spent together.

If his mother-in-law was that beautiful ... and, as you pointed out, unfucked by her husband, why didn't the sergeant take her to bed and make her a full fledged family member while she was visiting her grand daughter and Emma? After all, Emma had certainly been getting her pussy plugged by someone other than him during those last six years so there was no reason to feel guilty about fucking and cumming in her mother's tight pussy. She could still not have reached menopause, gotten pregnant and produced another pair of Topaz Eyes.... maybe MALE... to fuck all the women.

Excellent romance story, compact and nicely moving. Great writing. 5 stars

A very good story...between a lot of bad stories posted lately...this one is like fresh air!! Good writing, well defined characters, and to the point...4*

Overall I enjoyed this story. While there were a few mechanical issues, like time jumps with nothing to off set them, the story flowed nicely and wasn't difficult to follow. Keep up the good work.

That's some mighty fine entertainment, Todd172 🎭.

You have quite a few comments already. I'll only add one.

How soon before you post another story,lol??

AMerryman

Well written, but you seemed to overuse the element of telling the reader what was happening after the fact, and it made this a bit confusing at times. I found myself thinking . . . Who the hell is Cathy and Monica? Oh, they are friends from Emma's past. Why the hell is he kneeling down while talking to the deputy director? Oh, that's a little girl he's talking to. Is Frankie a rabbit? Oh, he's a pug. Is he raping her? Oh, it's a training exercise. The first time was an excellent way to start the story, but use that device sparingly.

Good story, excellent characters, good pace. Some areas tended to be confusing but this did not detract from the overall story. Get a good editor to help.

Good job, I'm looking forward to enjoying more of your work.