Bodie and Karma Pt. 02

Another video clip. No sound. She's swaying and gyrating while another woman is waving a light in her face. I can't see the woman's face. And then, whoever she is, she reaches over and roughly pulls open the top of Karma's dress, exposing her breast. Karma doesn't seem to notice and makes no move to cover up. Then the clip ends.

I feel like I'm going to be sick. I want to scream. I want to vomit. I want to cry. I throw the phone on the couch, then immediately pick it up and call her. It goes to voicemail again.

What happened? Why would she do this?

Another notification. It takes me longer this time to be able to look.

Another soundless clip. It's blurry. No, my hand is shaking. I don't want to watch, but I do. I can feel myself getting cold. Karma is sitting on a couch, or a car seat. Can't really tell. Her head is turned to the side, her beautiful hair is wild. She's making out with some woman. Her arms are not visible. The camera pans down to reveal that her dress is hiked up to her waist. A man's hand goes in and grabs her panties, gives a firm tug, and tears them off her. Then the hand comes back in view and goes straight for her now exposed pussy.

The clip ends. I'm practically panting. I realize tears are streaming down my face. Why? Why did she do this?

Another video comes in, this one came in faster...I'm still holding the phone. I dread opening it, they're escalating.

She's on her back. Her ass is near the edge of some bed or couch. It zooms in as some guy lifts her ankles and shoves his cock in her and starts pounding away. The camera moves. I see the same woman from earlier sucking on one of Karma's breasts, while the other one wobbles as she's fucked.

I don't know how I pulled it together. I remember more pictures and videos coming in. I honestly don't remember watching them. As devastating as it's been to see them, the worst was what came after.

First, an attachment was texted. I opened it. It was the paperwork giving up rights to Juni. It was signed by Randy. I realized I now know his last name. Goodwin. It's been notarized. That's not the one that destroyed me. It was the next one. Signed by Karma and also notarized. Finally, a text.

'She's all yours. I'm done.'

How the fuck could she do this?! I thought things were great. I'm so angry...I mean angry. I've never felt so betrayed. It's bad enough she cheated, why did she throw it in my face like that? What have I done to make her hate me so much? How could she do this to her own daughter?!

This would be so easy if it weren't for Juni. I'd divorce her and move on.

Speaking of Juni, I know I have to pick her up at the party. My God, what am I going to tell her? I don't know what to do. I don't want to go to the airport. I know in my heart Karma won't be there. But what if she was? What would I say?...do? My entire world has been shattered. I have an hour before I have to leave.

I call the only person I can think of. I don't know what to say but I need help. I feel like I'm losing my mind.

"Hello, Mom?"

I don't feel good about that. I don't feel any better and now I've upset my mother horribly too. We both cried. I haven't cried in front of her since Dad died. She's confused and I'm just messed up. She wants me to send her the pics and clips, but I refuse. She's coming down, leaving in the morning. She did suggest that for now I just tell Juni that her mom has to stay an extra few days.

It will let us figure out something...I hope.

I'm trying to stay calm as I walk up to the singlewide trailer. It's an older one and looks like it used to be kept up. I knock on the door and wait. I can hear footsteps; I think it's just one person. Then I see the curtain move and then the door opens a crack.

"Can I help you?"

The voice seems a little nervous. Why wouldn't it? I'm a stranger.

"Amber?"

"Yes?"

"I'm Bodie Sullivan. Ka...Karma's...husband."

I'm trying to stay calm. But after what I've seen...what she's done, it's hard to act normal. I see recognition flash in her eyes.

"Of course. I recognize you from the pictures. Would you like to come in?"

I nod, and follow her into the living room. She motions for me to take a chair and sits on the old couch across from it. I'm trying to figure out how to start, but she decides to.

"I tried to get her to stop and come home."

"What?"

She looked uncomfortable. I stayed calm and signaled her to talk.

"Karma. She always got a little crazy dancing. When those guys started trying to dance with us, I told her we should go. She said we'd be fine. After a while, she wouldn't come back to the table. After an hour, I was nervous. I begged her to come home with me. She said she was having fun. I reminded her I drove. One of the guys said he'd give her a ride."

She paused, wringing her hands. She was looking at the floor.

"What happened Amber?"

"I shouldn't have left her, but I was scared. She got back Sunday morning. She looked hungover...tired. She showered and changed. We didn't talk much. Then she told me she had to catch her flight."

"She never took the flight Amber. The rental car was dropped off Sunday afternoon. As far as I can tell, she never went into the airport itself."

"I...I don't know what to say. I'm sorry."

I didn't want to get into what Karma had done after Amber left. I think she had already guessed it wasn't exactly fitting for a married mother. What I'd seen in the pictures and videos was still something only I had seen, and my mother knew about.

"Amber. Can you tell me the address of the dance club?"

Again, she looks nervous. She hesitates. I know I probably look angry and am the cause of it.

"It was at a warehouse."

"Really?"

"Yes. It's abandoned. We used to use it all the time. A DJ would set up and there'd be a cheap cover if you were a guy. Girls got in free."

She gave me the address. I thanked her for her help and asked her to please have Karma call me if she saw her. She just nodded, still looking at the floor. I left.

I tapped the address into my phone's GPS and headed out. I arrived in town last night after driving down from Pittsburgh International Airport. I already knew her return ticket was unused. It's also when I checked on the rental car. I'm not even sure why I let my mom convince me to come. She has a tough time believing Karma would betray and abandon me, Juni, and the rest of the family. I do too.

But I know what I saw. I haven't been sleeping. I feel torn in two. Half of me can't believe this is real. I loved her. Hell...love her. We were so happy. The other half of me is angry and embarrassed. I want to cut my losses and move on.

She gave up Juni...again! Oh my God, what am I going to tell her?

The warehouse is a bust. If there was a party here, they did a damn good job of removing any sign they were here...and putting dust back on the floor. I don't stay long. Did Amber get the address wrong?

Back in the hotel, I think about the last couple of days. Juni's eight. After initial disappointment that her mother was going to be gone an extra week, she almost forgot about it when I told her Grandma was coming.

I let my boss know I was having family issues and needed to take a couple of days off. He was very understanding. I called Karma's school and lied to them too. They weren't happy but thanked me for calling them and said they'd find a substitute.

What am I going to do?

"Bodie, I'm not implying you should run away. Look at it as a fresh start. I know what you can do. I know you're in there. The offer stands. Take the weekend to think about it and call me. Hell, call me anytime, for anything."

"Thanks Sir."

I hang up. That was my old commander from OSI training. He's offered me a job. The kicker is that it's in Texas. He retired and took a job down there. He's offering me a job as an entry level detective. Not an easy thing to get from the outside. Most openings are filled through promotion. I'm flattered.

I know I look like crap. I'm tired and I'm having a tough time hiding the bags under my eyes. I've got issues. I'm seeing a counselor but I'm not sure it's helping. It's been a hell of a three months since Karma disappeared from our lives.

My military career is hanging by a thread. My performance suffered after a couple of weeks. Trying to raise a daughter while you deal with grief is not easy. Grief is what my counselor says it is. Grief and anger.

I've gotten out of a deployment due to my new status of single parent. I can't get out of another. My option is to either send Juni off to live with my mom, or have my mom come down here. I can't ask her to go through parenthood all over again at her age. And besides, I want to be Juni's dad. That hasn't changed.

For her part, Mom wants me to come back to Boston. There are two reasons I can't. First, the only job I can find in any police department would make me a beat cop. I want more. Second, I'm embarrassed. The rest of the family knows something is up with my marriage, but I can't face the questions.

There have been some awkward conversations. I told Karma's boss she had left me, and the area, and apparently wasn't coming back. They couldn't accept her resignation from me, so after trying to find her for a month, they suspended her. I've talked to a lawyer. I didn't show him the videos, but after the story, he suggested holding tight and then filing for divorce due to abandonment later.

The toughest was Juni. She's been through enough loss. My Mom and I talked to a professional, who gave us advice and said she'd be happy to talk with Juni if needed. We told her a version of the truth. Her Mom was gone, and it didn't look like she was coming back. We didn't know why. The part we hoped wasn't a lie... 'Of course, she still loves you.'.

She cried, she got cranky. She cried some more. But she's a kid, and like Karma, extra-resilient. She's coming out of it, but still seems a little sad.

My boss tried to sympathize, but he can only be so flexible. After all my investment in the Marines and then the Air Force, I'm leaving active duty. But the twelve years won't be lost. My current and past commander worked their magic and I'm being put in the Reserves. Retirement is a lot further away, but it's the best solution.

The beer tastes good. It's springtime in south-central Texas and already hot during the day. I'm at 'The Blue Line', a bar that's frequented by police officers, both active and retired. Subtle, huh? A bunch of us meet here every Thursday after shift and my boss and I meet every Tuesday, which is what it is today. I'm waiting for her to arrive.

It's about six months AK...After Karma. I'm still having issues. I thought I'd be over it by now. Nope. I miss her. What a wuss right? She cheats on me, abandons me and her daughter, and I miss her. But I'm a guy, so I keep that to myself. It bothers me. This whole thing has bothered me since it happened, and I can't seem to let it go. Something nags at me, and I don't know what.

Juni seems to be adjusting. But she's a kid. She's a little sadder and quieter than she used to be. Eight-year-olds shouldn't be sad and quiet. I've been lucky though. There's an unofficial day care run by spouses of cops. I never have to worry about her if a shift runs over, or I have to work an odd day here and there. She has friends and seems to like school. But a day doesn't go by that she doesn't mention her mother. She needs more than me.

The DHS case worker had obviously been troubled with the circumstances. I assume they tried to reach Karma but, in the end, the paperwork was done, Juni was settled with me, and they decided to finalize my application for adoption. They assured me moving to Texas wouldn't change anything.

She needs a family. And not for the first time I question my decision to come here. Should I have gone to Boston? I feel selfish. I did what was best for me. I need to put Juni first.

I'm brought out of my reflection as Maria slides into the booth across from me. She's not a large woman; more compact...powerful looking, with steel gray hair and piercing black eyes. She's good at what she does and is teaching me what she knows before she retires. She's done a bit of everything, Vice, Special Victims Unit, Homicide, you name it. She's also been helping me with my personal situation.

At first, I thought she was nosy. She just said it's how she is. She didn't apologize. I realized I found it refreshing. For the last two months, she's been asking questions about Karma, me, Juni...everything. Then, last week, she became the first person I showed the videos and pictures of Karma to. Call me old fashioned but showing them to a woman was more comfortable than the idea of showing them to a man.

"Bodie."

"Maria"

I tipped my beer in greeting as she raised hers. We both took a pull.

"Bodie, there's a reason people don't get assigned to cases involving family. Emotions get in the way."

I raised my eyebrow. Where was she going with this?

"I watched the videos and studied the pictures."

I reddened a bit at the memory. She noticed.

"I've seen worse."

"Gee. Thanks."

"You know what I mean."

I nodded. I knew she hadn't meant anything by it. I can imagine the horrors she's seen in over forty years on the force, well over half as a detective. She's looking at her beer as she slowly turns the bottle in her hands. Then she looks up at me.

"Let's review a few things."

She spent some time talking about what she knew about Karma and me, from the beginning. She'd state a fact and I'd nod. She summed it up.

"So, until six months ago, you had what many people would describe as a near perfect marriage."

I sigh and nod. Then we get to the events of six months ago.

"She called you prior to going to Amber's and texted you upon arrival."

Nod.

"The pictures, videos, and documents were sent the day she was supposed to come home, and a day after it is assumed the events in the files took place."

Nod.

"Did you see the crowd on the dance floor?"

"Ummm. No, I guess I didn't."

"That's because there isn't one. The mind sees what it expects to see. Especially when it's stressed. There aren't any people in the pictures or videos other than Karma, and her assailants."

WTF? How could I miss that? And did she just say...

"Assailants?"

She set her bottle down and reached over, placing her hands over mine.

"Bodie, I'm not asking you to look right now, but please do later. She's not moving in any of the videos after the ones she was dancing in. I think she's unconscious."

I thought I was going to pass out. I was suddenly fighting back tears. I didn't even know how to describe what I was feeling. Rage? Sadness? Failure? Hope?

"I...I..."

"Don't Bodie. Don't go there. I didn't notice the first dozen times I examined them either. Focus. Focus on what it means, what we can do."

I swallowed hard and nodded.

"Did you examine the documents that were sent? The ones where Karma and the biological father waived all rights to Juni?"

"Enough to know it was her signature. They looked complete and the State accepted them as official."

"They should have looked closer. The Notary Public's seal was expired. And did you see who the notary was?"

"No."

"Amber."

"Oh God."

"Bodie. See if you can get your mother to come down for a few days to watch Juni. I'm going to talk to the boss and make a few calls. I think you and I need to take a trip to Pennsylvania."

"Officer Carver, nice to meet you in person. I'm Detective Maria Rivera and this is my partner Bodie Sullivan."

"Nice to meet you both. Please, call me Joe. I'm not sure what you hope to find, but I'll help anyway I can. We do appreciate you informing us of what you're up to. Have to say, never expected anyone from Texas to be interested in our small town."

"Thanks, Joe, we'll keep you in the loop. I'm actually quite sure you'll be able to help us. For now, we're going to settle into the hotel and take a look around."

We each shake his hand and head back to the car.

"What's next?"

Maria looks at me and answers.

"We go to that smoke shop."

She pulls out and heads to the outskirts. Spring in Pennsylvania is nice. It brings back memories of better times...before all the mess. I think back to last week. Maria was full of questions. I learned a lot of new things, new ways of thinking. I also learned how much I missed. Things I may not have, if it were any other case.

The lead we're following now is an example. When I checked Karma's credit card for activity, there was a charge that showed up at this 'smoke shop'. It was essentially a store that sold everything you needed to smoke pot, except the marijuana itself. In my mind, it had been more proof she'd gone back to the way she was at sixteen. I had the card canceled.

Maria asked me if I'd called them. When I answered no and asked why, she said I should have checked to see if they recognized her. Of course, I hadn't. I'm an idiot. She said it was probably too late to ask for possible security cam video, but we were going to show them a picture and see if anyone remembered the transaction.

The place isn't the dump I was expecting. There is a ton of stuff for sale. Things you'd expect, like rolling paper, scales, baggies, pipes, even big water bongs. Then there's all the other stuff, lots of tie-dyed clothing, hemp products. Lots of 'lifestyle' products. Maria and I are in street clothes, not wanting to scream 'police' to anyone yet. The young girl behind the counter smiles as we walk in and head up to the counter.

"Can I help you?"

Maria smiles and holds up a photo of Karma.

"Have you ever seen this woman?"

The girl holds the edge of the picture, which Maria hasn't let go of. The girl slowly starts to shake her head 'no'.

"Never seen her."

"She's missing and she used her credit card in here six months ago."

"Sorry. I can't even tell you if I would have been working. I'd remember her though. She's pretty. Do you know what she bought?"

"No, it just showed up as a charge of just over three hundred dollars."

"We only have one type of item in that range; hand-blown glass pipes."

Maria nods and then holds up another photo. I know it's Amber. The girl doesn't recognize her either. Then Maria shows her a third. Right away the girl's expression darkens.

"Him I know. He used to come in all the time. We banned him though. A couple of months ago, we were sure he was shoplifting. We couldn't prove it but threatened to call the cops. He agreed to not come back so we left it at that. Smooth talker that one."

It was a picture of Randy.

Maria had spent a lot of time before and during our trip grilling me. The lack of follow-up was a general theme. I'd also learned I never should have shut off her phone, which I'd done out of anger a few days after receiving all the messages.

We'd also confirmed her Facebook account had not been updated since that night. She's essentially disappeared. There is a very scary possibility she is dead or being held. But for some reason, I just don't believe that.

Maria had also talked to Officer Joe Carver before we left. He said there used to be raves held in an old, abandoned warehouse near the one Amber had given me the address for, but they hadn't happened in a while. At least that he was aware of. That's where we are going now.

We pull in and it looks much the same as any of a dozen other abandoned buildings in this dying town. Industry moved on and, as typical, left its signs of more prosperous times, long ago. We walk in and immediately see that this place has seen activity since it shut down. No signs of a recent party, but there are signs the dust has been disturbed.