Bodie and Karma Pt. 02

This is the second and final chapter of Bodie and Karma's story.

This is a work of fiction. Unless otherwise indicated, all the names, characters, businesses, places, events, and incidents in this story are either the product of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

"Bodie, I have a daughter."

I was shocked! My jaw dropped, but I couldn't find words. I just didn't know what to say. I could see her face sadden at my reaction. It was just natural, I guess. She rushed on.

"I'm so sorry I never told you. Please, please understand I wasn't trying to deceive you! It's in my past and very painful for me."

I tried to process it. But I didn't really know much yet. I knew she wasn't a virgin when we met, and she had no doubt figured out I wasn't either. We just had never felt the need to discuss our past sexual encounters. I'd never have guessed she had a child though. I just asked the first thing that came to mind.

"Why now?"

Then I could see the signs of hope and fear again.

"Because the State of Pennsylvania is trying to find her a home."

Now I was even more confused.

"Karma, just start at the beginning. I'm not mad...not even disappointed. I understand not wanting to, or even being able to share particularly painful memories. I've seen things in combat I haven't told you...and probably won't. So, I get it. Just tell me what you can. I want to help. I can't stand seeing you this upset."

She gave me one of those smiles. The kind that a mate gives to their partner. A smile of appreciation and love.

"It all started after my mother died..."

After her mother died, she was scared. It wasn't that it was a surprise, a social worker had been involved since her mother's hospitalization a couple of weeks before she succumbed to cancer. But hearing someone talk about foster care in the background while you focus on your mother is nothing like the reality of it when you are suddenly all alone in the world.

"Bodie, we didn't have much but we were happy. And then it was gone. I was trying to deal with grief and was afraid about having to leave everything familiar and go live with people I didn't know. I was overwhelmed."

I thought to myself how the uncertainty and fear of what bootcamp would be like gotten to me before leaving. And I was an adult and had made the decision to do it! Not to mention I'd received 'inside information' from my father and uncles in preparation.

"And you were just a teenager. I know I wouldn't be easy at any age, but things just seem harder when you're a teen."

She nodded sadly and continued.

They found her a family that was a couple of towns away, but regardless of the proximity to the home she shared with her mother, she still had to go to a new school and could no longer easily see her old friends. The family she was with had two other foster children and while they didn't treat her poorly, there was no love.

She was frightened and lonely but was soon befriended by a girl her age, another foster child, but from a different family. Her name was Amber. Yes, the same one she had invited to our wedding. Amber had been in the system for a lot longer, and she helped Karma through some of the rough things, how to toughen up and have a different perspective. Karma started to become self-reliant.

This much I knew, although I'd only gotten it in pieces since I knew her. Hearing it all at once gave me a new appreciation for how hard it had been on her. I reached over and squeezed her hand sensing she was about to explain more. She took a deep breath and continued.

Not long after starting in the new school, a boy took an interest in her. She was a sophomore, and he was a junior. Amber liked him, but once he saw Karma, he pursued her. It caused some initial tension between the girls, but they stayed friends and Amber more or less stepped to the side.

Randy was charismatic and Karma was inexperienced. He flattered her, made her feel good. He said all the right things. She didn't realize it then, but he was manipulative and controlling. He had a rough group of friends, many of the same guys that hung around his older brother, who was a very low-level drug dealer. Before she knew it, he'd convinced her to smoke a little pot. It wasn't long after she got pregnant.

Once her foster family found out, they reported it to the State, who removed her from the home and put her with another family. Karma was scared. She'd barely settled in when she was uprooted, and now had a pregnancy to deal with. The new family was better than the first. They were a little cold but seemed to have her interests at heart.

They knew of a couple that wanted a child but couldn't have one of their own and arranged for an open adoption. They also did what they could to keep Randy away from Karma. He refused to acknowledge he was the father and claimed Karma must have slept with someone else, which was devastating to her given her age and fragile emotional state. Despite this, he continued to pursue her.

Her new foster family spoke with the police and the school. He was threatened with charges if he didn't leave her alone. Shortly after, he dropped out of school. She didn't see him again for over a year.

Karma grew up fast in the next few months. It is no easy thing for a young girl to be pregnant in high school. She met the couple who wanted to adopt the baby and agreed to let them be present for the birth. Karma gave birth to a healthy baby girl one month before her seventeenth birthday.

The couple let her name the child. She chose Juniper, partly because she liked the sound of it and partly its similar sound to the birth month. She was surprised the couple liked it, calling her Juni for short. She visited a couple of times after that so she could see Juni was being loved. Then everyone agreed it was best to end them and allow both the young mother and baby to go on with their lives.

She grew up way too fast during that time. Her foster family did encourage her to stay involved with school and friends. She was still friends with Amber and during her senior year discovered her love of dancing. Unfortunately, while out at some dances, she ran into Randy more than once. Despite him coming up to her, she made it clear they were done.

Karma had always had a talent for drawing and in her senior year the school's new art teacher re-sparked her love of it and ultimately helped get her enrolled in some courses at the local community college following her graduation.

Most of the rest I knew. After a year at the community college, her professor, recognizing her talent, helped her apply for a scholarship to the university. She got it and that was where we met.

It had drained her to tell me the story. I really did understand why it would have been buried deep. As much as she loves children, having to give one up must have been devastating. As if reading my mind, she spoke.

"It was the hardest thing I've ever done."

"I'm so sorry Honey. I'm sorry you had to go through all of that."

It also makes me realize how much I've taken my family for granted. We both sat in silence for a moment, reflecting. Then I asked,

"What does the State want?"

"Juni's adoptive parents, the Franklin's, were killed in an accident a few days ago. They want to know if we're interested in taking her and potentially adopting her."

I could see the longing, almost pleading look in her eyes.

"You make the flight reservations and I'll let my commander know what's going on. I'll take a few days of leave."

We made love last night. It was less about passion and more about reaffirmation, quiet and tender. Neither of us lasted long, but we held each other and talked softly about what we were about to do, until we drifted off to sleep.

Our bosses were very understanding and supportive. Our flight to Pittsburg wasn't going to leave until the afternoon so Karma called the social service people that had contacted her and let them know we were definitely interested and on our way. Then we talked more as we packed. Karma spoke.

"You know, I just realized Juni turned eight two weeks ago. Poor kid, some present."

"Did they tell you where she is now?"

"Yes. She's staying with a friend's family. But they don't have much and although they like her, they don't have the means to care for her for long. It's all been checked out and approved by the State."

"Well, at least we don't have to worry about her being cared for in unfamiliar surroundings."

"True. It did occur to me though that that's what we'll be to her. Strangers. Taking her away from everything familiar to her."

"I know. It scares me a little. Let's hope we can make her feel loved enough to adapt quickly!"

"We will."

"Karma, how did they even find you?"

"I wondered too, so I asked. Apparently, the Franklin's had one living family member. An elderly aunt. They tracked her to a nursing home. Clearly, she can't care for Juni. She remembered the adoption, and me, and gave them my name. Because I had been in the foster system, I popped in their records. They contacted my last foster family, who knew I'd gone to university. Then the university used the alumni database. I'd updated it with my married name. So, they made a few inquiries and found me."

"Wow. I'm impressed."

"Me too. I started babbling about how I'd changed, and was married, and educated, and had a respectable job. The woman just laughed and said, 'all in good time'. She did take some info though, and said they'd start the initial background check that would at least clear us to take her as foster parents. Adoption, or whatever they'll call it given I'm the biological mother, will be a longer process...if we go that route."

"Karma. You know we will. I have to say, I'm surprised they did look for you. I didn't think that happened when babies were given up for adoption."

"For closed adoptions, that's true. This was an open adoption though."

Karma explained the differences and I nodded my understanding.

For me, it was love at first sight. There she was, standing in front of the woman from social services, looking scared and alone. She was maybe a little shy of four feet tall and a skinny little thing. But one thing you couldn't deny. She was the spitting image of Karma. She had the same facial structure, same eyes, and same slightly wavy, brown hair.

We'd been told that she could display any or all of a wide range of emotions when we met her. She was probably feeling very scared and unsure as she'd lost everyone she loved just a few days ago. We'd been given a bit of information on what we could expect and how to deal with this. I of course, being like I am, practically memorized it.

Karma of course, being who she is, went with her instincts. She immediately squatted down to Juni's level. She had the biggest smile on her face. It was genuine, this was a mother seeing her child.

"Hi Juniper!"

You could see Juni's eyes get a little bigger. And then, like I'd witnessed so many times, Karma's 'kid gravity' started its irresistible pull. She didn't step forward, but you could see her posture change a little...become a little less unsure. As with most kids, curiosity tends to win out in the end and in a very, very, quiet voice she asked,

"How did you know my name? Nobody knows my real name."

"Well, I gave it to you when you were born."

There was a momentary look of uncertainty, but the gravitational pull was too strong.

"I've seen you."

"You have! But I don't think you'd remember that."

Juni turned and looked up at the social worker and held her hand out. She gave her something...a photo, I realized. And then I witnessed it happen. She turned back to Karma and walked right over to her.

"No. This."

She held the photo out to Karma.

"This is you, right?"

Karma looked at the photo and for a moment I thought she may cry. But she kept it together and answered her.

"It sure is Sweet One! Where did you get that?"

"My momma and daddy gave it to me. They told me you loved me like they did."

Talking about them was too much for her and she hung her head and started to cry. Karma held her arms open.

"Come here baby. Everything is going to be okay."

Juni stepped into Karma's embrace and her crying actually got a little harder. I looked at the social worker who had a tear tracking down her cheek, but with a big smile on her face. She saw me looking and nodded, giving me a thumbs up. I stepped over and squatted down next to them.

"This big guy is going to look out for us both. I think you'll like him; I sure do."

She stopped crying and looked at me, struggling to control herself. I gave her my best smile, thinking of all I wanted to give her.

"Okay."

Then she leaned back into Karma and started crying again. I put my arms around both of them. I have a daughter. I knew there was a lot of paperwork and endless details to take care of. I knew there'd be things to work out emotionally. But a big piece of my heart now belonged to her.

It's been a long process. We're frustrated at the length of it, not any particular circumstances. To this point, it's gone as expected, and every indication is it will happen. We're currently considered out of state foster parents. Things were helped along by the initial paperwork showing Karma as the birth mother. I won't get into all the hoops we are jumping through. We brought her home a little over three months ago. We're being patient. And of course, enjoying the hell out of Juni!

"Dad! When is Mom going to get home?"

Juni yelled this as she skipped into the living room.

"She's on her way! She's bringing home your favorite!"

She's adapting well. I remember the day we met her. We'd celebrated Karma's twenty-fifth birthday the following day. We'd finally gotten the okay to have Juni live with us while we began the adoption process. She was quiet at first, but liked staying in the hotel, and by the time we were eating at a restaurant was chatting away with Karma. The following morning, she looked scared as we entered the airport for the flight home. We learned that it was not about going with us, but that she'd never been on an airplane before.

We had our first wedding anniversary in August. Juni started calling us Mom and Dad a little less than a month ago. Was it too soon? I tried not to overthink it. The advice we get says love her and let her heal at her own pace. She has moments of sadness, like any adult, and little things can trigger it. But she has the advantage of youth, and like her mother, she seems to have an extra dose of resilience.

She was thrilled to learn she had a grandmother, and even happier to meet her. But not as happy as my mother was to finally hold her first grandchild. Juni's momentary disappointment at hearing she didn't have any grandfathers vanished when we told her about the dozens of aunts, uncles, and cousins she had not yet met.

The door opening brings me back.

"Food's here!"

Karma's voice is followed by her whimsical laughter as Juni yells her happiness and rushes to help her mom. You'd think any kid's favorite would be pizza, hamburgers, or something similar. Not our Juni. No. She loves barbeque; specifically pulled pork.

Later, she's been put to bed. I thought it would take forever to get the sauce off her face and out from under her nails. Karma and I settle in the living room to talk. She's leaving in a couple of days to fly back to Pennsylvania. There are a couple of things that need to be finished with our application that will be easier for her to do in person. As a bonus, she's decided to visit with Amber, her old high school friend. Juni and I will stay here. Three days will go by fast.

"Bodie, they found him."

"Found who?"

"Juni's father, Randy. The state located him. Not that it was hard, he's still in the same town."

The State had asked Karma who the biological father was. Although we could press forward with the adoption without his official release of rights, our lawyer agreed it would be wise to try.

"So, what's next?"

"They say he's agreed to sign. That's all they told me."

"Well, that's good news."

"Yes. I wasn't sure what he'd do."

"How's everything else?"

"Good Hon. I finished the last interview and tomorrow, I'll go see Amber. I'm going to spend Saturday with her then take her to dinner. I'm going to stay at her place then I'll head to the airport Sunday afternoon. I'll be home that evening!"

"I can't wait! We can't wait!"

She was beautiful and smiling. She and the young woman both looked happy, arms around each other's waists. Judging from Karma's right arm seeming to stretch toward the viewpoint of the camera, you could tell it was a selfie.

I assume the other woman is Amber. She has dirty blonde hair and blue eyes. She's pretty to Karma's beautiful. I'm sure she turns a few heads though. The accompanying text just says, 'Going out!'. I hope she has a good time.

She had texted earlier in the day to let me know she'd arrived at Amber's, and they were catching up.

The coffee tastes good, strong, and black. As my fog lifts it occurs to me, I haven't checked to see if I have a text from Karma. I go over and get my phone. Nope nothing. Well, I'll give her a call in a little while.

Right now, I've got to get Juni up and ready for the birthday party she's been invited to. She's excited. A dozen eight-year-old girls are going to a pizza party. It makes me smile that I won't be having to corral them! I'll pick her up on the way to the airport when we get Karma.

I call Karma and it goes straight to voicemail...for the third time. And she hasn't replied to my texts. I was worried a couple of hours ago. I'm...well...more worried now. It's just past noon and I haven't heard her voice since Friday evening's call. Since then, just the selfie and text last night.

Is there something wrong with her phone? No. I'm getting delivery receipts on the texts. Could she have been in an accident? God, I hope not. I've got to think.... Stay calm.

Then suddenly my phone chimes! I have a text. I run into the kitchen where I left it on the table. Me and my damn habit of pacing!

I'm confused but can't help but smile at the picture. Karma, dancing like she does. Even though it's a still-shot, she makes you feel the movement and music. She's got that wild look on her face, smiling. This is no selfie. Amber must have taken it.

I can't help but feel a little pissed though. She hasn't gone out dancing without me since college, and then it was always with a group of girls. The whole safety in numbers thing. I don't know where she was, who she was with...damn. She should have been more careful. I trust her but her and one friend? At a club?

I start typing, and another text comes in. It's a video clip.

Karma's dancing with abandon, but I'm not smiling now. There's loud music, but I think it saturated the mic. It's almost like static. The camera zooms in on her face and she looks out of it. It looks like whoever was filming was quickly waving a light...some kind of color-changing wand or something. It scares me to see her stare at it. It's like she's hypnotized. I'm a cop. I've seen this before...at raves.

What the fuck is going on here?! I'm getting angry...and scared.

I'm looking out the window, at nothing, when I hear the chime. I close my eyes shut tight. Afraid to look, but realizing I have to.