All Comments on 'Brittany Becomes a Cuckquean'

Your writing is terrible. Did you even graduate high school?

Your use, or lack of use of punctuation is obscene. There are things called commas and periods. You really need to learn to use them. Really hard to read. Use an editor next time. Lit has them.

Sure the punctuation is off, but I liked the fantasy. Hope you write more.

Lol grammar Nazis on literotica. Keep writing man I liked it maybe use the editor next time tho. It would rid you of people like that complaining in your comments.

I like the ideas that you have but it is a bit jarring that the grammar was off. I think you should continue to write though. The more you write the better you will become.

Felt a bit rushed and hurried, but other than that it was a good story.

... if someone else points out that bad grammar and, especially in this case, a major lack of punctuation make it hard to read the supposed story. To people with a good reading ability that lack just shows an appalling lack of respect by the writer for those that you hope will read your outpouring.

You don't talk without natural stops, or taking a breath, so why write like it?

Sorry but to me it makes your attempt at a story impossible to read.

So, if you wish to call me a "Grammar Nazi" then that just tells me that your reading ability must be about kindergarten level!!

I despise those who constantly comment on grammar and punctuation. Damn it's the story that count. This was hot. Two de wrest o yew sores of.

This was badly written. Fuck off assholes that think grammar isn't important. If you're going to write a story, at least learn how to write it. You idiots must be illiterate to think that just putting words on paper makes a story. I blame this site for allowing them to be posted. Used to be they were a little more picky about what they posted. Damn anything seems to pass anymore. Surely they can't be that hard up for stories? Seems to me that there are a few readers here that need to learn how to spell and write a proper sentence. 1* for being too lazy to get an editor.

I don't think he graduated from grade school. Maybe made it through 3rd grade. As one anon pointed out, how do stories like these get posted? Don't they have some standards on this site? What really is a scream, some readers actually think this is good writing. My god, no wonder this country rates about 23rd in the world in education. Listen author, let me give you some advice. Next time you write a story get a free editor (they are available on this site) to go over your stories and make sense out of them. I would be ashamed to post anything this badly written, aren't you?

Don't be put down by the anonymous commenters on here.

If you enjoy writing, keep doing it.

Your story is good. I really like the concept, and you have some fun mind games you play on the characters.

But okay, yes, I do think it would be helped by putting a period or comma after every finished thought. Add more periods than you think you need, even. And paragraph breaks. That way it's closer to how people speak, and feels more natural to read.

But really? In the end, it doesn't matter. You don't have to listen to my advice, or anyone else's. Write because you like it. If you're writing for an audience, then sure-- some of this advice could help. But if it takes the fun out of it, fuck it.

Good luck!

You're an idiot. Listen fellow, praising a story that is written as badly as this one, is NOT doing the author a favor. Write for yourself? Bullshit! Nobody writes for themselves. If we did, why would we post them on this site. We all want somebody to read our work and give us their opinion and hopefully are good enough to get a little praise for our effort. I know this is just a porn site, but spending a little extra effort with the help of an editor makes for better reading and understanding. Anything else is just wasting your time and mine. To those that say this is good, I feel for anybody that you have to converse with. Never mind, the comments speak volumes about you. End of rant. Author please, get an editor before posting again. Thank you.

It looks like you're missing some punctuation and paragraph breaks yourself, anon.

It's porn, dude. People write about what turns them on. They write for themselves.

Then once you finish a story, maybe you want to share it online, so others can enjoy it.

Or maybe some of you just do it for the validation you get in the form of views/feedback/comments. Which is weird, because I only ever see incredibly negative comments on stories here.

Sure. In a real scenario, where money is involved, you have to consider your audience. Some authors on here are nice enough to do that. But it's not mandatory.

If someone wants to write and post something, and it's unpolished, unpunctuated, or was written by a non-english speaker-- they should do it. And yeah, if an editor wants to look through it and help educate them on proper writing techniques, that would be cool. But if not, then it's fine too.

You think stories without punctuation are an abomination? Lucky for you, that's noticeable by sentence number one. Nobody is forcing you to be here.

I'd personally rather have the opportunity to read someone's thoughts however scrambled than not have that opportunity at all. I've read some jumbled stories with more original ideas than many polished ones.

So I say be supportive and give useful advice. Since, as a general rule, negativity gets you absolutely nowhere.

I like cuckquean stories. There's hardly any on here or any pornographic websites for that matter.

I will admit yes, the grammar wasn't the greatest. HOWEVER, some of these guys commenting act as if it's impossible to improve and there's no hope for you. Yes, you can and, in my opinion, need to improve, but that doesn't mean you should give up.

It's your first story and I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. Not the smoothest start, but you can write another with much more improved grammar. If you feel like it, you can even make an improved version of this some time in the future.

If you need help with grammar and don't want an editor's help for whatever reason, then look at the resources literotica has to offer. There's stuff about punctuation, structure, subject matters, etc. Good luck and hope to see more.

Please continue !

I've always said that periods and commas have no place in erotic literature. I write in bold italics and end each paragraph with an exclamation point. Soon, I'll probably start dropping articles and pronouns as well for the sake of efficiency. Hell, vowels are a waste of time too.

this is really hot. i love a good cuckqueen story where the wife or girlfriend is really humiliated and degraded. i hope you write more!

But where is the rest of the story. if he has Programmed her he could have Programmed Tiffany to accept being Bred. And rubbing it into Brittany's face about her having his Baby first. then bring in others to rub it into Brittany's face.