All Comments on 'Brother Sister'

Too much craziness

Say what you like about Rakiura's stories but they are never boilerplate and are often unpredictable, and although I find them all exasperating to some degree he still manages to keep me reading right to the bitter end. Can I say I like them and look forward to reading them but I don't like them because of the way they pan out?.

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This one, though, is more like the usual trope we expect in Loving Wives. The betrayal was outrageous, and the casual, still ongoing, incest made it even more so. The fact that there was not a cast of secondary obscure characters was also welcome. And for once, Rakiura's protagonist behaved as we would expect with instant revulsion and a determination to escape the abnormal wife and his marriage pronto. So why am I still left wanting?

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My problem (and it is my problem, not the author's), is that for once I'd have loved to see the protagonist barge in and smack them both round their heads. If ever there was a scene that provided a perfect opportunity for confrontation then this was it, and although I'm usually the sort of guy who would just walk away never to return I thought a confrontation was absolutely warranted here. Imagine how they would have reacted when they were discovered. All their dreams of a happy future blown away in an instant, and with only themselves to blame. Man, I'd have loved to have seen that.

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Still really enjoyed the story and thanks for writing it. By the way, the NZ author Eileen Merriman had a short story "Double Helix" published some years ago that had a surprise incestuous ending (but not in graphic detail, and it wasn't meant to be any sort of erotica) and I thought it was a great little story that was very understated but powerful and disturbing. I think it can be found here for those who want to read it:

https://www.penguin.co.nz/article/1585-short-story-club-15-june

Very good story until the end that spoils everything and looks too much like a Disney or LaLa Land movie.

It's a shame to want to be at all costs in reconciliation or redemption, or on the contrary in a vision of BTB and revenge.

Sure you'll get slammed for wrong category, but to me the core is a LW story.

Some proof reading and a run through Grammarly would help get the few typos and tighten things up some.

You were on for 5 stars until... "the most happiest". A serious bug bear - 'most' never goes with a word end 'est'.

What a stupid rubbish story. You can do better than this, I know you can. But this tale just does not cut it. The story is woefully disjointed and jumps about all over the place.

The characters are scarcely believable, and the rational behind their actions even more so unbelievable.

This sad story scores 1/5. Sorry, but there is just so much wrong with it on so many levels. In some ways l wish l could score it less.

Better luck next time

This trash should be in the incest category

Had the germ of a good story, but too disjointed and then you really blew it with the cheap joke at the end.

The story was looking fine until the Epilogue. What a mishmash of convoluted ramblings. You are normally good at time frames/structures but this got completely out of hand.

Why would he allow his dead wife to tell him that Fi would look after him? Is he so useless that he can't do it himself? Plus, just cause his ex-FIL made him the Manager of his business when he retired, it does not mean that he "inherits the family fortune" when the old boy died. He was just the manager/CEO not the damn owner.

It sounds as if Fi would have been a better person to write about than the useless Mark. What a dickhead he was.

For once, a Rakiura story that's short and straight to the point. And - as Pencarrow correctly stated - anything but boilerplate! ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Another long strange trip.

The ending really didn't work and I can't imagine him asking about the anaconda. I'm also not sure that the mental illness that leads to incest ever leaves a person, but it was interesting.

I would like to see everyone involved dealing with the immediate aftermath of Mark sending the video. Especially the lead characters. It just feels too easy to jump ahead 20 years. And also, in recent stories by this author, the husband does not confront (or we are not shown him confronting) his unfaithful wife. We never hear the wife's apologies or efforts to save the marriage. It's just like cheating occurs, there's a time jump and we're filled in on some of what happened. It would be nice for the wronged husband to be able to confront the wife and her lover(s), and them have to answer to him for their actions.

Well THAT was fucking depressing. The admins of this site REALLY need to add another (BTB) category so we don't have to read this kind of drivel.

Rakiuras hero's always appear to choose the wrong woman to fall for

The epilogue needs to be re written. Almost impossible to follow.

Well, that wasn't what I was expecting at all!

Two major plot devices (cheating with multiple partners and incest) which ran parallel and then came together in the end.

WTF was this mess?

This was so f-ing stupid I can't even begin to figure out a comment that could encompass it all.

That was quite interesting but I needed more details. The twenty year jump just left me feeling cheated.

Saved again by the tags.

It is difficult not to be distracted by Fiona's mental dysfunction. Once an author presents a character's mental inadequacy it drains all the meaning from the plot and the behavior. There is no point in wondering why Fiona betrayed her husband and acted in such a monstrous fashion, she did it because she's crazy. That drains all the energy out of the important question of . . ., why? How could she do the things she did to her marriage and her family. Oh, yeah, she's mentally incompetent. OK. Let's put her in a padded box and get on with our lives.

Does it really make any difference why and how they spend their senior years together. The betrayed husband is just as likely to wake up one night getting his cock sucked by Fiona, or finding that she has set the house on fire. Take your pick; fifty/fifty odds. A bizarre tale, but of course it makes no sense.

Thanks for the effort.

This says it all. ONE*

I agree with other comments, definitely a unique story. I do like that he immediately went for divorce and didn't just allow it. The husband felt very judgy about his wife's history of partying when first away from home, wasn't his girlfriend or wife then.

I also agree with another comment that seeing some of the immediate aftermath and not just a huge time jump could be interesting. Did she try to apologize? Was she immediately remorseful?

It was well written and it did keep me reading the whole thing whether I was satisfied with the outcome or not, credit is due for that.

As encouragement, I gave this a 2. It didn't deserve it. Especially the ending. Never would a real guy let a fucking drug addicted whore who needs surgery to put her pussy into some semblance of normalcy move into his house. Especially since he knows her history. Maybe set her up in an apartment somewhere but that whore would not interfere my life and getting on with it. And I can't imagine a set of circumstances that would have me at the funeral of her od'd gang bang kid. Nope, wouldn't have happened.

What she did on the wrong scale was a four; what he did was off the scale in destroying how many lives? Some of these "religious" traditionalists think they are so good. But their spitefulness and need for revenge make them as anything but.

I would have walked away and let them live their sick life. What was the point of ruining everyone's life in the ned? Revenge is sick.

When I was realized wife #1 was a lost cause, I just walked and never looked back. Her life was hers to fuck up. I made my own. And my conscience is clear.

I gave it a 3, not a terrible tale despite a terrible subject but had some bad parts. The ending I dunno just didn't click with me. I love reconciliation stories but I think they need earned, need done by good people who made a mistake. Fiona sounds like a terrible person through and through who didn't deserve a happy ending in my opinion. She deserved everything that happened and more, I like some reconciliation yes but also love some good revenge against a person who deserves it. Still not bad, just could have been better.

If you did not like this type of story why did you read it? It was tagged very clearly, brother/sister incest.

Great that Mark manned up and sent the video....really messed up the end when he was back with the slut Fi

Actually I thought it was pretty good. Needed to explain why he married her in the first place, knowing her "wild child" history. Letting her go to the bachelorette party dressed like a slut was not believable either, given her history. Finally, the epilogue didn't seem to have a lot of effort put into it, with the 20 years later cliche..... Still, I kinda liked it.

some of us have a spine, and, kalimaxos,,,some of us don't

Fi envariably chooses to lose her virginity to her brother Douglas,then fuck god-knows how many else guys at Uni,but later marries Mark as a second thought because she was trying to get over her sexual attraction to Douglas.

But Mark woke up when Fi came home,and proceeded to fuck Douglas one more time,but Mark recorded every last word of how Fi and Douglas were incestuous lovers for years,but also how Fi fucked 3 strippers the night before,and was happy to do so.

And come to find out Sam I take it was Fi's and Anaconda's baby who died later,and mark exposed Fi and Douglas for the Filthy Incestuous Cheaters they were and Douglas vanished without a trace.

Fi also disappeared eventually to become a homeless addict who showed up after 20 years to Marks new wife Melanie,and slowly recovered from her alone time for over 20 years,and Melanie passed away from liver cancer.But finally Mark forgave Fi and invited her into his house and family.

Now considering all that happened with Fi and Mark it seems a far stretch he could just forgive Fi for her life of degradation and hedonism,also the part where Fi's pussy was so stretched out she had to have corrective surgery to close her gaping hole back up,and get trampstamps removed with laser treatments.

Jeez Fi sounds like a living cum receptacle,but alas Fi sounds like a product of her environment,and paid pretty dearly for her life of shame.Also I'm sure after Douglas abandoned Fi and disappeared that Fi slowly or maybe quicker than that who she really was and what she lost.

So should Fi be forgiven for her lifetime of selfishness and sin,to answer that I say she should,because Fi learned the true meaning of humility and humbleness when she was old and grey.So I am glad Mark welcomed Fi back into his life.Whether Mark and Fi ever got back together as BF and GF or if they just remained friends I don't know but I think if they did try again Fi vowed to not repeat the same mistakes she did in her youth.

This story was Super Detailed and glad it worked out somewhat at the end,except I wish the author had left out that Anaconda reference at the end.Also I take it Mark never managed to give Fi a baby by him,which is kind of fitting so Fi would have atleast one regret of not having one of Marks babies,Fi didn't deserve to give him children.That is all.

Reading again:

He married into a hippie family to a slut daughter who has a stupid brother. Spectacular plan.

Throw in incest? Sure. Why not. MC deserves all this and more as stupid tax.

Was the incest sex scene necessarily that long?

Last sentence laugh saved a story that repeatedly jumped the shark.

Anon it is difficult sums it up.

Kali, your comment is goofier than the story. All he did was let the family know WTF was going on. You know, the people who REALLY needed to know you dumbass.

I say the last sentence was hilarious. Whole story was just a set up for the totally inappropriate and hilarious punch line that is the last sentence.

What the fuck is this?

Disjointed and rambling.

What a waste of time.

Also not a reconciliation story.

We’ll, a bit over the top. Incest plus gang bang, plus adultery is over the top, that there is no real drama, just a recitation of her sins.

Plot aside, an enjoyable read.

To know that Fiona ultimately paid for her and Douglas's Sins by spending a year under house arrest,vanishing for 20 years,losing her only child,becoming a crack addict,being homeless,and throwing away her marriage for meaningless sex,and ripping her whole family apart you have to ask yourself was it worth it?

But for both Mark and Douglas to tear Fi's world apart namely Mark exposing her,and Douglas for hauling ass after the fallout sure as hell left Fiona lower than dirt,she was pure scum.And the reference that Fi had a pussy tattoo the had to remove,and to also have vaginaplasty to close her gaping crusty and nasty pussy to some semblance of normalcy was a sheer miracle.

Finally I pray Mark never allowed that Filthy Skank into his bed again,its one thing to forgive someone but to actually take them back is just stupid,and hope he didn't do that.

Well, this ranks up up there on the " Worst LW stories" list. Yikes.

Well he lost all respect from anyone still having something to do with the cheating slut

Why is he being so friendly with his ex I mean she had a gang bang where she was a willing participant and got pregnant by another man then she decided to have incest with her brother again in the same house as her husband this was not some mistake she chose to fuck the other guys and let them cum in her though she knew she could get pregnant that includes her brother she didn't care about her husband she wanted a kid and she didn't care who the dad was