by SimonDoom
Bobby stone, lacie stone & mayor Andy Berke
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W245MzBrfUU
& if you really wanna get involved in some good time, help yourself
https://www.facebook.com/Andy-Berkes-Meme-Reduction-Initiative-1024149720978796/
Jedd Clamprt
Now you've ruined all Mike Hammer stories for me , Happy with yourself ?
Seriously , I get what you were going for ( at least I think I do ) , but it just didn't work for me.
You tried to go Noir , but it just wasn't chippy , or fast paced enough , IMO.
Thank you for sharing . And I hope you try again , because I truly love the Noir style when done well .
13 YEAR OLD'S WRITING OF A DREAM. BAD WRITING, BAD EVERYTHING.
A funny story till the half of it...then the promised twist was just a bucket full of shit and all the story went down the drain to the deepest in the sewer...And as @Crkcppr says: "Mickey Spillane you're not!" This detective kind of man, uses the same theory dictators use: They hate wars, cheaters, and so on, EXCEPT when they are the ones doing it, with the excuse that if they don't do it someone will! 1*
There are three things he hates; but he's ok with men who cheat on their wives or women who put up with their men cheating? And he's ok with women who cheat on their husbands with him?
What the fuck is wrong with you?
Was going well then you fucked it up . Or should I say you cucked it up. Here eat my used condom.
Have been in Humor/satire? If so, I'll bet its ratings would be much higher.
OK I could see the twist a mile off but LW could do with someone lightening it up. 5* for writing with humour and also a sense of style!
Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to read and comment on my story. Some of you have been quite savage in your criticism -- but that's fair! Go for it. I appreciate positive and negative comments and I hope I can learn from them.
Characters need much more fleshing out to sustain a real story. But, had to bump it from 1 * to two ** just for "the sniv in sniveling and the milque in milquetoast" sentence fragment. Hahaha!!
Saw the twist coming, but not bad. Gave it a 5 to counter the flood of people who hate that they love LW stories and give everything with a cheating wife a 1.
It's been a long time since I've read a piece of shit like this.
That is very funny😅.
Gave you 3*s.
Write something else soon please. Maybe a more substantial story.
Thanks.
AMerryman
Wow, this was just way beyond stupid..... Not even going to bother scoring it....
But it was still a humorous read. Well written, with good dialog. I did feel that Myron was a tad overdone as the doormat cuck, however....
Thanks!
Loved this story. As crazy as it sounds I have personally been involved in situations like this, having friends of mine's wives come on to me real strong. The only way I could convince them their wives were cheaters, was to fuck their wives in front of them. I lost some friends over but WTF.
I kind of saw the twist coming maybe not in the detail that it ended but it was forcasted. Still. pretty funny story.. I liked it.
Mike Hammer! Some great phrasing and alliterations! Fun Read for sure!!
As a reader and follower of Elvis Cole and Spenser and Myron Bolitar, I really enjoyed this. Maybe use 'okay' instead of 'O.K.' in dialog? This story deserves a higher score than it has now.
She was very attractive but gave the impression of not being a particularly sexually oriented woman until I'd been rhythmically burying my dick, deep in her very tight pussy, for about five minutes. Suddenly, as if the power switch of a jack hammer had been flipped to the ON position, she started bucking so fast and hard that she threw me right out of the saddle. Surprised, I thought to myself, 'Holy Fuck! What've I got here?'
Putting an arm under each of her knees, I pushed them up, then got a death grip on the pillow behind her head and began fucking the living shit out of her. Her entire body was rigid... shaking hard and vibrating... making a sound as if she was in eternal orgasm. I think her toenails were vibrating.
I'd fucked hundreds of women but never one like her. Her reaction distracted me from coming long enough for my dick to become desensitized so I ended up fucking her like that... unmercifully for at least two hours before I just stopped to take a break. When I did, she totally collapsed, like a blowup doll that had just sprung a major leak. A few seconds later, she said, "Whew! I never dreamed it was like THAT." ... She'd been married, had two kids and her ex-husband had left her because she was 'cold'. He was a splash and dash two minute wonder who never got her started. She had no idea what sex really was until that day. (Her ex had no idea what he was married to.)
Right after she made her statement of never knowing 'it was like that', I reached down between her legs and cupped her cunt. She instantly sucked in a deep breath and her entire body went stiff again. Her fuse was lit. I was amazed by her entire reaction and by how tight and juicy her pussy was, while I was fucking her.
I was very strong and, in those days, in damned good physical condition, too, so I remounted and fucked her HARD for another five and a half hours and she was with me, stroke for stroke. She's THE ONLY WOMAN IN MY LIFE that I was never able to fuck into submission. I fucked her regularly for about three years... spent at least ten hours a week in her saddle... and she really was a good woman... quiet, pleasant personality, nothing resembling a bitch, highly intelligent and an extremely talented artist. I fucked up ROYALLY by not dumping the near zero sex drive free loader I was married to and replacing her with this beauty.
Your story was cute but I only gave it 4 stars because the last line was like fingernails on a chalkboard.
A silly, sexy tribute to noir detective stories... and a fun frolic
WHEN THE "DICK" KISSED THE LADY I QUIT. BUT I CAN IMAGINE THE REST. TOO BAD HER HUBBY DOESN'T HAVE ANY BALLS BECAUSE HE COULD OWN THE DT. AGENCY, THE WIFE COULD FILE RAPE CHARGES, AND THE "DICK" WOULD BE IN JAIL. FACT, FICTION - WHATEVER HAS TO BE BASED IN SOME REALITY OF SORTS. UNLESS, THIS IS "STAR TREK", OF COURSE.
Don't waste your time with this garbage. Wish I could give it less than one star.
Fun little story. Good job on keeping the style consistent.
LW is obviously not the right place for it, but I am not sure where it would fit better.
I’ve never read any of your stories before but, on a whim, thought I’d look you up. There are only two categories in which we appear to share a common writer’s interest, Mature and BDSM and you have one story in each, but as this was your only Loving Wives story, and with that category’s reputation I thought I’d make this my first.
I laughed all the way through this story. But you have made a massive mistake with the category. It should be in Humour/Satire or, if you had actually called him Mike Hammer etc, it could have been in Celebs/Fan Fiction. I think the readers who didn’t get it probably aren’t familiar with the 1940/1950 type of books/films that you are, presumably, trying to emulate. I’ve given it a 5, although it would normally have been a 4, to balance out to some extent the negative voting.
You could always delete and submit again in H/S, or make some small alterations and submit in C/FF. I made a mistake with a story but when I submitted exactly the same story again in a different category the ratings were massively different. I can see why you submitted in LW but I don’t think it’s the type of story that readership is expecting.
Liked it a lot. A gem. 5 stars because I read it from beginning to end and was engaged all the way. Noire pastiche done well. I rarely get to the end, and if I don't get to the rating page I don't rate. A serendipitous find; I was looking for some of the much talked about, but difficult to track down negative comments in LW category. Nothing much to see here.
Hahaha. Great sense of humor. And you’re very good at painting a picture with your words
Don’t understand the negativity unless it’s mostly from people who expected something different in LW category. I liked the story, the way things were setup, the doormat rich guy, and his trophy wife. All so very common in this world. But the ending was indeed a bit of a surprise for me. Didn’t really see that coming although after the way he had been treated by this husband previously I can certainly understand him taking advantage of the opportunity to carry on with Svetlana. It’s just a shame he had to give up that fine piece.
This reminds me of my own story:
https://literotica.com/s/the-case-of-the-vindictive-cuckold
Hopefully; you will enjoy.
I mean he's right you know. That's the sad part of it. Cheating wives will cheat no matter what. You either dump their asses or you live with. Of course this one is a bit extreme as it portrays her as some kind of serial cheating slut. The point remains in any case.
The last flag on this story said btb, which is also in the name of the story. The story is anything but, the flag is untrue and I wonder if the name and flag were actually intended to troll btb fans.
nobody got what they wanted except sonny . maybe the cheating slut did ?? she wanted more cock,so....