Bullied into a Schoolgirl Sissy Pt. 03

Hey guys!

I'm sorry for making you wait so long for part three.

At first, I thought about pushing through and finishing it quickly, but inspiration is hard to coerce, and I found myself having to scrap half of what I had already written as it did not meet what I considered "good enough to publish".

Writing this chapter was a long road, with many ideas that I wanted to explore. Only the first draft took me over a week, and then editing it down to something manageable was even more time. Guess I understand now why "Winds of winter" will never come out.

I hope the wait was worth it. And that you find it even better than the previous chapters.

I know my style wont be for everyone and that my stories are not perfect, but I hope the few people that like them, really enjoy them.

As always please share what you think about them in the comments.

*All characters are over the age of eighteen.*

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A bright light was shining across the room, tinged with the orange hue of sunrise.

The smell of sweat, stale sex, and weed lingered in the air.

I found myself moving slowly, drowsy with remnants of weed and other unspecified drugs still in my system.

I moved one hand, sliding it across the warm varnished wooden floors, still sticky with memories from last night. The world was slow in my head, and all I heard was my own paused deep breathing: it sounded soft, delicate, slow... in... and... out...

My hand reached something right over my face. My eyes could not focus on it until my fingers slid thru it and moved it away: silky, smooth threads of the brightest red hair. The color giving off several distinct hues as the light of the sun hit it. Starlight on copper.

~Beautiful...~

I tried to remember what had happened the last night. ~I came to a party... then... Axiom... Sia... ~ And... finally: ~My Angel... gone. ~

The heavy weight of reality slammed down on me and, instantly, that pleasant peace of sleepy confusion became replaced with chains of shame. They drove me down to the ground and dragged heavy tears from my eyes.

~What had I done? ... what have I become? ~

My fingers, which were now shielding my eyes from the light curled into claws and I wallowed in the despair. I had not fought, I had surrendered; I had done everything to degrade myself... And for what?

I thought for a moment about ending it all right there. ~I am not a man anymore... I don't even deserve to live...~

A heart wrenching feeling swelled inside and I gasped through the pain, sobbing as it came out in a distant moan. ~I... am alone...~

...

A soft loving sensation came over me as a pair of arms wrapped around my naked body.

'There... there... its ok... We all cry in the beginning.' Said the voice. For a moment I mistook it for my mother's, but as the tears cleared up from my vision, I recognized her.

Sia was kneeling on the ground, her scent was fresh and sweet, like freshly baked bread. She had a loose-fitting dress that came down from the shoulders to her knees. A light pastel yellow, long enough to hide her indecent tattoos.

I gained some strength at the sight of her, and managed to recover from that curled up position to a kneeling one. She helped me up slowly. Still in the haze of my first drug hangover.

'I know this feeling well my love...' She said with a soft sad smile on her face. 'I know it hurts... Angel... she is a very good liar.'

Her words didn't make much sense in this half drugged, half asleep state, and it took me a few seconds to gather some moisture in my mouth and allow it to open up and surrender some words.

'W...' I coughed as my irritated throat protested the effort. 'What do you mean?'

The tone of my voice surprised me, it was thin, high, breathy, almost childlike. ~That is not my voice! ~

'That's a lovely voice you have, love.' she said, noticing the reaction in my eyes. Then went back to a much more serious tone for what came next:

'Angel... Is not who you think she is...' She paused for a moment and then said: 'A long time ago... she was my girlfriend too.'

I felt surprised, but after it washed over me, I considered the implications. Logic did not seem to hurt my mind now, and the concluding idea quickly formed itself.

'She... has always been... Axiom's pet. And we...' She started.

I managed to gather strength and interrupted her with my conclusion:

'We are her prey...'

Sia looked down truthful sadness in her eyes. It was true, I felt it as well.

It didn't matter that now I knew the truth about her, I had acquired strong feelings for that evil woman during the last couple of months. She had made me fall in love with her, tell her things I hadn't told anyone else. ~She had made me fall in love with her...~

The feeling of shame didn't go away, it didn't even diminish one bit with that revelation. I had fallen squarely into Axiom's trap: I had surrendered the one thing I cherished the most, simply to please... his cock.

*Cock*

I felt the strange stab of sinful pleasure in my gut. ~How can it be... after all this... I still want him!?~

Sia grabbed both of my hands and stared directly into my eyes, her bright sapphires shining gorgeously in the morning's light. Then she said:

'A sissy like us will forever live with this conflict.

We love these feelings: being vulnerable, being exposed, degraded, humiliated. It's not that it doesn't hurt... it hurts every time I'm forced by my desires to degrade myself, to let myself be humiliated.

I feel the fear every time I surrender my body to them, the expectation every time they lift one hand. When and where will the next slap land? I feel fear. We all do.

But the shame afterwards... No... I don't feel that anymore.

My love... I want you to see what this new life can give you. If you only, just let go of your of what's holding you back.'

She lifted herself off the ground and me with her.

~What is holding me back?~ I considered it as she carried me around the space.

The living room felt like a completely different place now in this morning's light. Full of trash and spent things from the night before, with me being just another one of them. But also much warmer, safer.

~What is keeping me ashamed? Feeling the dragging weight of guilt?~ I wondered. ~Dignity...?~

She took me down to the guest's bathroom and helped me into a shower. Warm water flowed over my head, and I felt it running down to the depths of my soul. Dragging away most of the sluggish pain from my body.

'Ill be right here when you are ready to leave.' She said as she went to the threshold, then another sentence straight into my soul: 'I won't leave you alone...'

_____________________

The dripping sound in the booth as I closed the valve reminded me of so many mornings, back when life was normal. ~Was I genuinely happy back then? When life was "normal" ~

As my first foot landed on the warm dry tiles of the bathroom's floor, I called out to Sia.

'Hey... I am ready...'

She came in instantly, glowing and staring at me all over. My body was already wrapped by a long towel, but I saw in her expressions that she was thoroughly enjoying the activity of gazing at me.

'Come love! Let me show you!' her voice sounded soft, smooth, almost like honey.

She took me by the hand and opened a neighboring door, a large guest's bedroom laid exposed. Someone slept here last night, but the bed was already made up. The sun entering through the opposite side, were floor-to-ceiling windows let in the view from a small but beautiful garden, full of tropical flowers.

'Oh wow...' was all I managed to say before she pulled me along and made me face the wall opposite to the windows.

'Oh wow!' My voice was much louder and more excited than before.

In front of me was a large full-length mirror, dark wood framed on a white wall. Reflected on it, two figures, looking almost immersed in the sea of flowers behind.

One was Sia, looking beautiful as always. Dancing effortlessly between the most innocent looking girl in a room and the most deliciously lustful thing in existence.

Besides her, not quite as tall; or rather "even a bit shorter" than Sia, was another woman. Slender waist, lithe arms, and narrow shoulders, with a thin neck and longer legs than expected for a woman this small.

Her red hair fell softly, almost floating onto her mid back, full of volume but as delicate as angel's hair. Her lips were thick with flesh, her lower lip rounded and cushioned, and her upper was bowed and profiled. She now held her lips partially agape with an almost vacant expression on her face as if she were thinking about something wonderfully pleasant.

Her eyes were large, rounded, and matching Sia's beautiful sapphires in both hue and brightness. A matching set.

Her body, covered by a grey towel, still revealed delicious curves: A pair of large perky breasts held themselves hostage inside the towel, and a wide, thick pelvis revealed fertile looking hips. A hint more and the hourglass figure would seem exaggerated, but in this woman, it was all in lustful balance. The narrowness and delicacy of the upper body contrasting with the wideness of the overly fertile looking hips.

'I am so proud of you...' Sia said. 'You are the most beautiful sister I could have ever hoped for.'

~Who is she talking to?~ I wondered.

I turned to face Sia and was startled as the woman in the mirror did the same.

'How... what... I... it's... it's really me!!!'

I turned from Sia back to the mirror, and then to Sia again. Multiple times as the reality of it all never seemed to sink in. Half expecting the dream to end, and me to be suddenly plunged back into my old boring body. Into my old boring life.

I placed my right hand on the glass, then the left. I inspected every millimeter of my skin. A desperate attempt to absorb the dream and finally make it real, permanent.

~Why do I find this body so utterly fascinating? Is this what I desired all along? ~

The slightly upturned nose, the almost elven ears, the way the large eyes had a hint of almond in their shape. I saw my collarbones and how they contrasted with the rest of my chest, the ribs just slightly silhouetted as the skinny girl moved them, in and out with every perplexed breath.

I looked at my fingers, delicate and thin, and how each of them was crowned with a perfectly shaped natural nail. Slowly, the body began to became real in my mind. Every slight movement of my fingers sending a clear message to my brain: "This body is yours".

I took a step back, still staring at myself, the way the slender feet gave way to thicker thighs, still hinting at a thigh gap as they were covered by the towel. The shine of wetness reflected the light off my perfectly rounded breasts. I glanced twice more from the mirror back to a downwards view, realizing how, in fact, it was not an image projected from a screen, but a true reflection of my body.

~My body... my body...~

I looked at my face once again and saw the exact moment when the expression in that girl's face filled up with genuine joy and the rush of excitement. A hidden, secret dream, one that not even my conscious my knew about; had just been fulfilled.

'It's me! It's me!' the girly voice cried. My voice, my words.

I saw the beautiful girl starting to jump up and down in the air, the red hair floating slowly down as the wind and inertia lifted it.

'It's me! It's me!' The rush of energy filled me, and for the first time in my life, I absolutely loved who I was.

I turned to Sia and grabbed both of my hands; I saw the small tears of joy in her eyes as she grinned back.

'This is me! This is my body!... Oh Wow!' I laughed and found that I too was crying with happiness.

She hugged me tightly and her voice carried so much of that innocent love, as she said. 'I know... I know... It is who you were always meant to be.'

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The reality of the situation had crept in slowly. A short talk with Sia and a quick dressing up in some unisex clothing later I was off.

It was still only Tuesday morning and I thought about the consequences for missing class so early in the trimester.

'Don't worry too much about it.' Sia had said. 'The school wont make a big fuzz if one of us, is skipping class'

"One of us". Had she meant "Pastels"? Sissies? Just the two of us?

~What is the purpose of my being in this school? Why are we so different? ~ The rush of excitement from this new body had died down slowly, and I was now focusing on the cost that it would carry.

I looked down to the street paving, seeing how my new body moved and swayed with every step. Even under the grey sweatpants Sia had given me, the wideness of my hips and the curves on my waist and chest could not be hidden.

~How did I change into this? ~

I found myself strangely enjoying being in this body; but the fearful mystery around its purpose and fate still hung over me like a sword. More than that, I had a new worry as I got ever closer to my home.

~My family...~

~What would they think of this new person I was... Would they accept me? Would I end up being kicked out? Alone? ~

I closed my eyes and my mind drifted back to that horrible vision: lying on my back, naked, on the dirty floor of a dank alley. I remembered it too vividly: trying to stand up and then finding my body lacked the necessary equipment to do anything at all. Just a set of used up holes, without any agency.

As I opened my eyes, I still felt the random spattering of icy rain that fell on my exposed body in that vision.

~But it is not real... Not yet at least...~

The morning had almost turned to midday by the time I reached the door to the small house where my mother and I lived.

My sister had gone to college, thanks to a well earned, surprise scholarship, and now it had been just us two for the last three months. A small family, extended only by an old grumpy uncle living on the opposite side of the country.

We had had a rough time for many years now. But lately our finances have improved slightly. My mother managed to get a decent paying job, and although it was almost permanently night shift, she seemed happier. More relaxed.

~She would be home now. ~ I thought as the house became visible in between a row of identical looking small houses.

When I opened my phone in the morning, I was unsurprised to see a few missed calls and anxious messages from her. Wondering where her "precious man" was.

~Well not a man at all anymore...~ I thought as I lifted my phone, now seeming much larger in my new feminine fingers. I typed a reply. "Almost home now." And then added, as if begging for the reciprocating message "Love you, mom."

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The door swung open, and I was greeted by the now familiar sight: A small living room with two couches and a coffee table, a few meters away a dining table that could maybe seat four people tightly. Behind that, the counter for an open kitchenette. A medium sized rectangular area where two people could live in moderate comfort.

As I was laying down the bag that carried the clothes I had used last night I heard a glass brake.

My mother was standing at the threshold of her bedroom, her hands frozen as if she was carrying something. On her face was an expression of absolute shock.

'Oh... no...' she breathed.

I was lanced by the fear, straight into my bowels. 'Mom? I... I can explain...'

Tears were starting to run down her cheeks. 'My poor boy...'

Utter confusion was taking hold of me as she was moving forward. Uncaring whether her bare feet would encounter a shard of the recently broken glass.

'I... am sorry...' was all I could muster before she lunged at me. I closed my eyes instinctively. The vision of that alley almost became real in my mind.

Her arms wrapped around me, she was holding me tightly. I could breathe again, the alley vanished from my mind.

She was much taller than me now. It had been five years since I passed her height.

Feeling her arms engulf me completely made me feel entirely safe for the first time in weeks. But then...

'No, my baby... It is me who must be sorry...'

My eyes flew open.

'What.... What do you mean...?'

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I was seating on the dining table, my elbows locked to the cheap wooden surface and my hands held my face as I sobbed unconsolably.

What she had said made no sense in my mind.

~She had sold me to them. ~ was my only conclusion.

She had talked amply, explaining, and trying to excuse her reasoning:

"The school seemed like a very decent place to be from the outside. They had told her that they were only using it to test new technologies and cutting-edge biological sciences. They had said that everything was perfectly safe."

~I don't feel safe at all...~ I thought as the world slowly came crashing down around me.

I begged her to tell me a lie. To tell me something that didn't make it seem like she hadn't just sold her only boy to a company for human experimentation. But in the end, she loved me just enough to tell me the truth.

She said in desperate confession: 'We were about to loose everything, I had debts neither of you knew about, we would have ended up in the streets, the state would have taken you away from me... After learning how desperate I was, someone had even offered me money to have their way with me... and even your sister!'

I couldn't keep quiet after that last sentence: 'So you decided to whore out your son instead!'

I slammed my hands down on the table as I screamed at her. Then pushed her away as I ran to my room and locked it off.

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Echoes of soft sobbing still lingered in my room. Three hours had passed and by this point my mom had already stopped trying to get me to come out an hour ago.

I looked around the room, the faint haze of recent tears dulling all emotions and slowing down my racing mind.

The room had always been a blank slate that just never got filled in. The lack of money, of interest... or perhaps even of true personality.

A simple bed, beige linens without any adornment, A simple desk, with an old "hand-me-down" laptop on top. For some reason, before all this, the spartan style of the room had not bothered me at all. But now, after all these changes, the room, my old life, felt empty and boring in comparison.

I sat down in the bed; my feet now hovered a half inch from the ground. I swung them back and forth slowly as I thought about this new life of mine. Logic was not always painful apparently, and I could go through my old overly analytical, mental processes without hindrance. "Pros and Cons"

~I have to accept it... even if it wasn't something I thought about many times before... I do feel much more comfortable in this new body. ~ I lifted my arms up in front of my face and stared at how much my hands and wrists had changed.

~The sensations that came with it thou... ~ I thought about the strange mix of pleasure that tainted the moments of fear, of humiliation, even of sad injustice.

~And...~ I swallowed as my conscious mind engaged with the deeper desires inside, analyzing them as if staring into an abyss. ~That pull... that need...~ I felt the image of large black power again imprinted in my mind. ~To serve...~

The shame followed it as the pleasure passed through. ~Is this my dignity, fighting back?~

...

*Ding dong*

I heard the doorbell outside, then after a short pause, the sound of the front door opening. Some indistinct mumbling and then the door closing soon after.

~Did she order something? ~

A few seconds later she was knocking on my door. 'Hi... sweety... something came for you...' She said through the thin door, her voice sounded so close.

I sighed, not wanting to act, move or do anything at all today. But finally, curiosity pulled me out of the haze.