All Comments on 'Butterfly - The Girl in the Woods'

'he' had no Landline and no Cell phone coverage, how did 'he' get Internet access?

Definitely NOT a tech person. Here are any number of ways to get internet without phone or cable or cell service. It's called satellite or direct radio. Those of us out in the real world outside of the city know all about it.

But the real reason for commenting. Excellent work, somewhere between four and five stars. Good charter work, a little flow problem here and there. A few paragraphs that combined perspective from different charters, and other points where the following dialog belonged to the charter in the previous paragraph.

All in all good work.

Nice plot, but the execution needs work. The structuring lacks, being actually poor in some places. Important pieces of the story don‘t get enough attention and the end has been written very hastily. Grammar needs some polishing as well. In this form slightly above 2.

I appreciate the literary criticism, and accept much of it as valid. The ending probably was rushed, and needs to be rethought. For dialog, I tried to mirror how people speak, which isn't always grammatical. I'll take a look at many of the other aspects of the story. I worked most on characters and plot, and probably gave short shrift to some other parts of the overall story.

Why do you regard the point about Internet access as a criticism rather than as an enquiry?

To me that shows signs of an insecurity!!

It's possible to get cable or satellite without having phone bundled in. Even if phone is included in the bundle, if one never gets a telephone or hooks it up, they will lack landline.

Not sure how I feel about this one.

It is a very good story, but the total Left turn in the middle kind of threw me off. It was almost as if it was two stories that were forced together.

But over all, I liked it.

Nice plot but you should consider taking help to your writing thanks.

.BD

Overall good story but the std checks should have been added at the time line that it took place. Also adding a page to incorporate there passion along with a child to go in with family life.

I read this attracted by the girl, and stayed for the guy. Are you for real?

I LIKED YOUR STORY A LOT. IT HAD A FEW HOLES, BUT OVERALL IT WAS ENJOYABLE. ALL STORIES CAN USE IMPROVEMENT, DON'T TAKE IT PERSONAL. I THOUGHT THIS STORY WAS MORE ABOUT ROMANCE, A LITTLE DRAMA, AND SOME SCENTUAL SEX AT THE END. IT WORKED BECAUSE THE STORY WASN'T DIRTY.

After 4 years...

Still a very good read.

Thanks !

THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE . . . . . . .

Two broken people, yawning abyss of unfulfilled hopes, groping blindly with no idea when or if it will succeed. Trying to be decent, self doubt.

Yep, life.

Great job writing, very good character development.

Very nice and well written story.