Buyer Beware

I could not get a single word published. My student loans still had to be paid, but a degree in Journalism leaves its recipients with few choices. I could be an editor for someone else's work, but no one goes that route unless they have to.

Then I got a break. I made a cold call to the Editor of Harper's Ferry News and he finally offered me $300 for each article I wrote on the performance of health care products. It could be anything, from diet pills to fad exercise equipment. He was ready to run a series over the next 6 months to a year, and if it took off, he would increase the rate accordingly.

He called the series..... Buyer Beware.

I was early for my appointment, but I wanted to see what it was like to work for a magazine. Mostly it was quiet. A few beeps and whistles could be heard, as various phones sounded off their odd tones. Finally, Mr. Kingston waved me in.

"I read your four pieces last night, Christine, and I have a check for you."

True to his words, he handed me an envelope.

"They were a good start, but I want you to cover some of the more risque products next," Mr. Kingston explained my next assignment as I thought about the bills that I would get to pay.

"I had them give you an extra 200 for the merchandise that you have to buy, but you have to keep the receipts or the money will be deducted from further payments."

So far, I had tested products that I found around our apartment, but now I would have to buy something from an actual sex shop. I called my boyfriend, and suggested that he meet me at Jolly Lolly's, our local emporium for sex toys.

The owners were local legends in the sex club scene. They were both from Manchester, England, so Lolly would make you a cup-o, while Leo would show your masculine partner the new power toys. They had everything; from battery powered Ben Wa Balls to full power thrusters and vibrator combos, with a built-in bench and soft leather security straps.

Our initial budget only covered a fraction of the available toys, so we settled on a cock sleeve and vibrator combo, that was meant as a Valentine's gift that a couple might purchase. Lolly suggested that it was a big seller, though she warned us that it was not a custom made product, like a small cocked man might want.

I suppose we went about our lovemaking differently that night. I mean, we are usually passionate and spontaneous, but I insisted that we make this academic, for my report. We did strip completely, but I did not let him peel my clothes off, as he usually does, while kissing the parts that he exposes, and running his hands all over my body. Usually by the time we are fully engaged in coitus, we are both well on the way to our first orgasms.

The instructions were printed on a 2x3 inch folded booklet that acted like a strip of condoms, as it unfolded to a 4 foot ribbon of operating instructions in multiple languages. We sat close, to read the English foot.

"Do you think that our KY is okay, or do we have to get this 'love cream' that they recommend?" I mumbled.

Marcos fired off a text to Lolly.

"She says that KY is good, but she recommends the tongue," Marco read from his phone.

I smiled, remembering how she had asked me about Marco's 'tongue talent', while we drank our tea. She also mentioned his broad shoulders and what she called 'strong hands'.

"I don't want to write about your tongue, tiger. I will keep that to myself," I told him as I tousled his hair. Then I applied the jell to the inside and outside of the cock sleeve and I plugged in the vibrator.

"Okay, put the cock extender on your cock, Marco," I instructed my partner.

He wasn't fully erect yet, so I watched as he masturbated his six inches, first with his own hand, then he used the sleeve like a vagina until he was hard and big enough that it didn't fall off.

"How does it feel?" I asked, in a voice that might have expressed my mixed feelings of lust and revulsion.

"Nice,... Um, ya, but we better get on with it, or I will lose it."

I thought he meant that he would cum, so I lay back to give him the chance to penetrate me with his now ten inch cock.

When it fell off, it was sooo funny.

Rule number one: do not laugh at your partner's cock.

There is a lot of literature on good relationship building, but none of it starts with the basics of: Never laugh at his cock!

I am a professional writer, so we did manage to get back into the documentation of the performance and evaluation of the product.

This time I helped. I could see that keeping him hard was going to be the secret, so I put on my invisible 'whore hat', and I started to talk dirty as I used my own hand to do the work of keeping the sleeve in place while he fucked me. It was almost like I was hand fucking both of us. Marco's eyes eventually went back in their sockets and he had a pleasant release, but I could not have mine until he stopped trying to fuck, and he pressed the vibrator harder into my mound, pressing my clit hard into the empty silicone toy. His softening dick fell from the cock sleeve, but the toy remained embedded in my pussy as he leaned in and suckled one of my nipples, vibrating me to a nice climax.

"Good work on the 'The Valentine's Special that was not so Special' article," Mr. Kingston offered as I again sat in his visitor's chair.

"We got a lot of feedback about that one," he explained. "But don't worry about complaints," he went on, "Getting their attention is what sells our magazines."

The office of Harper's Ferry News was just a part of Newport News Inc. so I found myself writing for a variety of magazines. I was making more money, and though the articles had to be longer, I still felt very lucky to have the chance to get my name in print.

Another trip to the sex shop was in order.

"You need to purchase the power plunger, dear. We could rent you the rest of it, but you have to buy the part that goes inside you." Lolly explained the lease agreement for the 'Power Plunger 5000'. "Are you sure that you don't want to buy one outright, dear. Everyone does, eventually," she added.

"I'm on a budget, Lolly." I explained my limits to our new friend.

I confessed to her how I was doing a product review segment for Men's Health, so it had to fit their budget.

Lolly smiled at that news, and showed her business sense by getting me to include the name of her emporium within the story, then she called my Editor, and before she was done, she had a nice spot on our advertising, right next to any article that I wrote.

"You won't have to pay for any rentals now, but that's just for you and Marco." She gave me a wink and an air kiss, then continued. "You pocket that hun. It'll be between you and me."

I never thought of Lolly in a sexual way, prior to that. Now, I had to chuckle and say to myself, maybe...

"So what do you think of Lolly?" I casually mused as we drove back to our apartment.

"Oh, Lolly, uh, yeah she's super," Marco responded.

It was not really the answer I was looking for, so I had to rephrase the question.

"But would you fuck her?" I asked, as I had done hundreds of times over the two years that we had been together. He said 'no' only three times, and one was a goat, so I guess he has his limits. Grandma and Caitlyn Jenner are also safe.

"Oh yeah!" He shocked me with his enthusiastic answer. "She may have 40 pounds and 20 years on you, babe, but 10 of those are in her tits, and you just know she's going to be good with those fun bags!"

My girls are nothing to sneeze at, and I've never had a lover that didn't pay them their due, but still, I had to accept his answer as true, and I could judge him, or not. That was the way we handled our relationship, and I loved it.

"So, what about Leo?" Marco challenged me. "He has a giant package showing through those tight jeans."

"Oh, I hadn't noticed," I lied. "...but I imagine he knows how to use it, with all the parties that they have hosted over the years." I trailed on in a soundless afterthought. We had never been to one of those parties, but word travels far, when it involves sex.

We stopped in the lobby, to get our snail mail. There was a long envelope, with a label on the outside, instead of the customary window to the internal pages that are either hard copies of a credit card statement, or a request for funds from any number of charities.

This one envelope drew my attention. I opened it before turning to the kitchen to start our dinner.

Inside, I found a one page announcement for a free week at the 'Wilderness Cabins'. The simple form explained that Ms. Christine Clarkson had won a week for two at a luxury cabin in upstate New York, only 4 hours away! I had a web page to go to, to view the amenities, and after a brief look, I found that the deal was real. They needed no credit card or banking info. I was just required to show them my picture id upon registration.

The day before the trip, our new Power Plunger 5000 arrived, so Marco spent the day putting it together, while I did a fluff piece on a love swing that we had attempted last week.

When Marco had it put together, we decided to let our maiden passage wait until we got back from the Cabin. The anticipation was going to make the delay a sweet one. The 10 inch thruster had a warm squirt feature, to add lubricant, and the vibrator head had two small micro vibes along with its big head. Just looking at it made me tingle from my knees to my nipples.

We both brought our laptops, so Marco would have something to do while I wrote. He was always a beach kind of guy, not so much a backwoods man.

As soon as we got on the turnpike, he unfastened his buckle, and patiently set to work undoing the top button of his jeans with one hand.

"How about giving me a hand," He suggested.

I didn't even take off my seat belt. I just looped the chest belt over my shoulder, and I used both hands to free his soft tool. Being fully aware of his limitations, Marco lifted his ass and weaseled the far side of his pants, down and off of the seat, while I did the same to my side. He smiled like the Cheshire cat, while he flicked the cruise control on at 4 miles over the limit.

His cock inflated nicely with just a few licks, and soon I was driving too, pounding him to the back of my throat, while gripping his shaft tightly between my lips.

He just relaxed and five miles later, he blew his wad. I was hoping he had enough focus to keep from hitting anything. It could cost him his cock! Oh, and the week would be ruined before it even got started. Soon after I was in need of a washroom break and a coffee, so Marco went through the drive through while I ran in for a pee.

He had to pull over and let me drive, for the last hour, but I didn't mind. The directions were in the GPS and I was just gliding down the highway, while Marco snored.

When we got to the Wilderness Cabins, we were surprised to find the sign looked like it had recently been hung, and the lake wasn't much more than a stocked fish pond.

I parked the car and climbed out, while Marco was still waking up from a deep sleep. His release had certainly put him into vacation mode. I climbed the porch steps and looked out at the water, which looked gorgeous in the pictures. Now it looked like a mosquito breeding ground.

Two men came out to greet us. They looked rural enough, with ball caps covering unwashed hair and beer bellies that made their belts curl over. The way that they looked at me, made me nervous right away.

"Is this the cabin in the photos?" I asked the nearest yokel.

He just smiled at me, like he didn't know English.

Four more men and two women came out of a barn type structure behind the house. They approached the car from the open side, and I started to feel trapped, as our fun getaway was disappearing before our eyes.

"Let's all go into the studio, for our demonstration," One of the bigger guys ordered, and there was no doubt that the command was meant for us.

When we got inside I saw that it was much more spacious than I had thought, and they were doing some kind of manufacturing.

Then I saw the packages. They made the Valentine's Special that I had given a negative rating in Men's Health!

They had a lunch area, but they had a king size bed laid out center stage, with lights and cameras encircling it.

"Don't be frightened, Christine and Marco," their spokesperson began, "as you have probably guessed; we are the American Manufacturers of the Valentine's Special, which, thanks to your article, is now not wanted. We believe that you did not follow the instructions properly, and we are prepared to demonstrate the proper use of our product, so that you and your magazine can issue a retraction to your earlier negative test."

I was feeling nervous still, since there were over a dozen men in the lunchroom, but they made no moves to hinder our movements, and they offered us seats, to what? I didn't know... But I've always had the time for a live sex show. Don't you?

Act one, was a careful reenactment of the sweet lovemaking between a man with a modest 5 inch cock and a petite, small breasted woman in her 40's. She looked like one of the workers, though an energetic one. Her partner inserted his cock into the sleeve, then lubricated only the outside. I realized right away that I should not have lubed the inside!

The couple brought their demonstration to a very pleasant conclusion, as the older woman squirted for us, then coated the outside of her partner's black cock sleeve with her white pussy cream. It was a hot scene, and I started thinking about the fucking machine waiting for me back home.

"So, can we expect a retraction in next month's article, Ms Clarkson?" No one had even introduced themselves, though they had shared much more.

"Oh, well, I um... couldn't do that," I started with a stutter, "It was all about our test, and I am sorry it didn't work out for you. Good luck on your next Special," I offered.

They looked back and forth at each other, then they must have had their plan B all ready to march out for us.

"We will have to show you another demonstration," he said, nodding his head, like he had expected this to happen.

Two of the men grabbed Marco, and pulled him to the bed. Others joined and his pants were wrestled from his body, then he was strapped to the bed with his limp cock laying between his legs.

Two cute young ladies brought a Valentine's Special to Marco's struggling body, and they inserted his cock into the sleeve, keeping his balls gently cradled. They wore short skirts, but they kept their legs spread, giving Marco a beautiful view of their shaved pussies. One of them lowered her pussy onto Marco's mouth, while the other impaled herself on the ten inch cock sleeve.

I have seen Marco make love to other women, but these two kept bouncing on him giving themselves orgasm after orgasm, while Marco was in heaven. He was getting just enough stimulation to stay rock hard, but not enough to cum.

When the ladies were satisfied, they pulled on the cock sleeve, while one licked his balls, bringing him to a full orgasm after nearly an hour of fucking. It was a very impressive demonstration.

"What do you say now, Christine? Have we proven that it was your fault that you didn't have the time of your life?" Their leader demanded.

"Well, you certainly have a legitimate complaint, and we will look into it," I explained, though my obvious intent to sidestep them was probably etched to my face.

"We will have to show you another demonstration," he said, with a shrug of his shoulders.

Marco was removed from the bed and taken to a couch, where he sat between the two women that had just finished with him.

Two men escorted me to the center of the lunch room, and they stood, while I removed my own clothes. Then a man and a woman took me to the oversized bed. As I prepared myself to be used as a subject of another one of their demonstrations, a dozen workers formed a circle around the bed.

The broad shouldered young man had a penis that was smaller than Marco's, but who knows what the inflated size would be. The cute and buxom woman went through the familiar process of securely attaching the phallus, then applying a light cream to the long tool.

I was expecting to be mounted, but the couple lay on either side of me, and they started to play with my breasts and my clit, in a shameless effort to make me super horny.

By the time I felt the cock sliding into me, I was already melting from the royal treatment. When I started into a strong orgasm, they gently put the vibrator on my clit, to extend the feeling for long minutes.

"We will expect a retraction, Christine," their leader again insisted.

I was still having orgasms, when they packed us into our car, and Marco drove us out of the lake area.

"Should we go to the Sheriff?" Marco asked, though he obviously did not want to go that route. He didn't feel raped, though he could lay a claim to it.

"I would rather not have my mother asked for her opinion of weather I was being raped, as I cried out for more," I responded, knowing that I did want more, and my orgasms certainly revealed my enthusiasm for the final demonstration.

So we just went home. I wrote up a retraction, but the magazine only put it on their last page, which few people look at.

It took a few weeks before the other shoe dropped. We were at our favorite love shack, when Lolly showed us the new advertising for a 'Springtime Special'. It included three demonstrations of their product that left no doubt about its effectiveness.

I wish them the best of luck.