All Comments on 'Camping with Dad'

5 Stars. I liked it.

Too short. Well written. More please.

Pretty good overall, though I do feel the ending was a bit rushed.

If you write another story, draw it out more. A lot of readers enjoy the longer stories, and it gives you a chance to flesh things out, as it were.

You could also add a chapter or two to this one, allowing the girls to explore each other more and maybe swap dads.

I do like your writing style so keep publishing!

Nice story John, curious as to why Hazel is so tired all the time. Liked the lead up to Hazel and her dad, though just a tad rushed. Congrats on posting your first story. I'm an aspiring writer at this point. Hope to post here.

more of these characters please

Who is Jake?

If one were to skim this, rather than try to actually read it, it would probably make more sense. You're horrible with dialogue. Somewhat less than the first was all I could stomach.

Wanting to see a part 2, fleshing out hazels desires. Maybe a daughter swap or group play.