All Comments on 'Candy Ass Marine'

Another great little story.

Boyd

I'd say that your time line comes close to mine and that your time was served in 'Nam. Regardless; To you Marines, Special Forces, Seals, and other Snuffies I'm glad I was able to assist when the need arose This old Fire Controlman and Horny 'ol Sailor was proud tø be of assistance. Ronnie W.

I loved it. I Loved how you described Sue. I just love this story over all. I am a BBW and I find these kinda stories to be the best ever. Thank you for writing it. Please write more when you get a chance.

Grey Eagle that was the finest piece of writing in a story i have seen yet i wish all writers could write as good as you are Hoo Rah Marine God Bless you i hope to read more of your stories like jake and susie they are my kind of people will you be writing more of Jake and susie soon?

Pat Murray

Atlanta,Ga

I like this one best of yours that I've read so far, and better than the stories of a lot of other folks too.

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I recommend you to read <B>"Leaving the Navy"</B> by <I>Scorpio44</I> and <I>Scorpio44a</I>. Actually you would probably enjoy most of <I>Scorpio44's</I> stories.

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I hope you have and continue to write more soldier came home stories. Remember that not all of the wounds are visible.

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<I>-- srgeek --</I>

I like your imagination, I assume that is where your stories come from. Your dialog needs a lot of work though, it is stilted and unreal, that makes your characters seem one dimensional. Read the following authors for examples of good dialog: Scorpio44/scorpio44a, D.C. Roi, strickland83, Tall_cool_one and bluedragonauthor there are quite a few others, but these are a good start. I didn't list any women (that I know of) because I perceive you to be male. Most of these guy's writing has improved since the started. Look at their range of submit dates and stories from the last half of that period.

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<I>-- srgeek --</I>

When you tell a story you set the scene for each phase of it. You MUST describe the surroundings and draw the reader into this context. Most of this story had stick-like characters with a few random features walking in a gray mist that had random props appearing out to surprise the reader! You had a good story concept but you need smoother dialogue and sets.

Excellent story again as usual.

Great story line.

With Veterans day right around the corner. This was a great hot wonderful story. really enjoyed it going back to read more of your works.. Thanks again

I just don't get why people get all bent out of shape over having scars.They tell the stories of our lives and are something to be proud of for the most part,even most of the ones we get from doing dumb things.They're not something to be ashamed of or need to hide other then the advertising media have sold us on the idea that in order to be pretty or hansom we have to have perfect flawless skin and bodies.The same thing about the BBWs,be happy with who you are .Personally I'd rather hold a larger softer woman than to hug a hard sack of bones.A woman should be soft and curvy,not all hard muscle and bone.

I really enjoyed your story. Thank you.

...back and forth compliments were enough to cause a little gagging. A couple of antacid tablets were enough to set me right. A straight "G. I. Joe" hero-worship tale. Three stars for trying.

Oooooooh-rah!