Candy's Fashion House Ch. 17

Alecia walked around the door followed by Josh at just that moment and they both came in for hugs. I moved away and let them have some space. I went for a walk out in the garden. As I was walking around my phone rang. It was Lauren wanting me to go back to her room.

As I walked in Alecia walked over and hugged me. "Thank you for staying the night, I knew you would. Josh and I are going for a walk so you two can talk some more." With that Josh and Alecia kissed Lauren and disappeared.

She smiled. "Can we still talk baby?" I nodded. "Yes of course."

She sucked in a deep breath and bit her lip. "Kelli the night of the party Alecia and I thought if we could just get you and Josh together and talk. To just spend some time together it would be all right. We just wanted to get you to open up. But at the party you were so bitter and angry. The moment we walked in I could see it. You weren't going to even open your mind enough to consider it and it frustrated me and then I got angry."

She took a sip of water as she dug up another dose of courage. "Then later when we got home and oh god. I don't know baby we had been drinking all night and that continued when we got home. I was so drunk I lost sense of what was really happening. It all seemed so surreal it was like my fantasy was finally going to happen. I managed to convince myself that once it was happening right in front of you it would all just happen." As she sipped her drink she sighed. "But baby I saw that look in your eye. I didn't mean it you know I just said it to excite you." The moment I said it I knew I had fucked up but it was too late."

I was biting my tongue trying not to say something that would make the situation worse. She kept talking. "Baby I have come to realise I have feelings for him. The longer we have stayed together the stronger those feelings became. Soon I felt myself falling in love with him."

Now that was hard to listen to. "So you love him?"

"Yes I know it's fucked up. I know it must be hard for you to hear this but yes I have real feelings for him."

I shrugged my shoulders. "Then I guess that's all there is to it. I am glad you have been able to move on."

She barked. "Oh fuck Michael don't be so stubborn. Listen to what I am saying. Stop being so hard headed nothing is black and white. Christ you frustrate the shit out of me. You won't even be honest with yourself let alone me. This isn't about moving on. What I have come to realise is that it's possible to have feelings for more than one person. It's possible to love more than one person."

She had a wild look in her eye. "Baby I do love both Alecia and Josh but it's not like the love I have for you. Our love is forever."

We sat in silence for a few minutes before she picked up my hand. "Kelli I love you even when I am with Josh all I think about is you being there with us. I know it's twisted and sounds ridiculous but I want you to be with us. I have had this dream and fantasy that you, Alecia Josh and I could live together just like you and I did with Alecia."

I was shaking my head but she carried on. "Don't you see how amazing that could be? The four of us all living together. God it makes me all tingly when I think about it."

I stood up and paced around. Trying to figure out what to say.

She hunched her shoulders. "Kelli it hurt me when you refused to even consider it. You didn't even think about it for a minute. It made me angry and frustrated that you thought so little of me that you wouldn't even try. I explained to you how I felt and you just cast it aside like yesterday's news. It was like you didn't even care how I felt. I know it's silly but that's how I felt. Fuck Kelli even Josh has been open enough to try."

Now she had my interest. "Try what Lauren?"

"We picked up a guy at a club and took him home with us. Josh was brave enough to make love with him. If you weren't such a wuss you could have been there as well."

I laughed almost hysterically before remembering where I was. "The queer little cunt. Fuck me I would never have thought he was a fucking poofter."

Lauren was horrified. "Oh my god you bigoted intolerant closed minded fucking Arsehole. Just because he is prepared to try something doesn't mean you can say mean things about him. He is braver than you and what's more he loved it."

I realised what I had said was stupid and inappropriate. Fuck our business is staffed almost entirely by gender fluid or gay people. I couldn't believe I said it.

She snarled. "So is that how you feel about Alecia and me? Are we fucking queers as well? Is that it; are we just filth because we are the same sex and love each other?"

I was back peddling. "No Lauren I never felt like that and you know it."

"OK then arsehole if it's OK for Alecia and Me why is it wrong for Josh or you?"

"Lauren I can't answer that, it's different. I know it's a cliché but for women it seems more natural, acceptable."

"God Kelli I never realised what a bigoted shit you really are. I always thought it was just because you were scared. In reality you are just a fucking homophobe."

She shook her head forcefully. "I can't believe you could be so cruel."

"Lauren don't you realise we are different. I love you more than anything. That love doesn't allow for other people. I am sorry but I could never live like that."

She waved her finger at me violently. "No Kelli that's not true. Candy saw it in you straight away and I have seen it myself. Fuck I remember watching you tease the fuck out of those construction workers at the factory. You loved it. And the way you looked at Josh yes we all saw it you have feelings for him, you are curious. I know you. It's exactly the same reason you won't come out and tell everyone you are Trans. You are so scared of what other people think that you won't let go."

I was getting pissed off. "Look Lauren if you are feeling OK I am going to leave. I don't want to argue with you here. I will come and see you tomorrow or when you are feeling better."

She pulled me in by the head and we kissed, it wasn't just a friendly comforting kiss but a hot passionate tonsil tickling wrestle. As I pulled away my heart was racing and my breathing was ragged. God even now she knows exactly how to excite me. I could feel my cock hardening as our lips glided apart. She smiled at me and nodded. "Yes you still feel it, just like me don't try to deny these feelings Kelli."

I walked away more confused than ever. I still had those same feelings for her. God damn it just a simple kiss and I could barely breathe. Fuck her why couldn't I move on.

When I arrived at work the next morning Siobhan was waiting in my office. She had brought coffee for both of us. As I walked in she stood and walked up and kissed me, her arms circling my head. As we sat down I could see tears welling up in her eyes. As we sipped our coffee she leaned across my desk. "I am sorry Kelli. I didn't know she would do that."

I was confused. "What do you mean? I don't understand?"

"It was me honey. I am the one that ratted out Lauren and Alecia."

I choked on my coffee spraying my desk with coffee flavoured spittle.

"I am sorry Kelli but I hated what they did to you. They were so mean to you. The pair of them are evil and I was angry. I was angry at them but I was more angry with you. How could you let them walk all over you like that?"

I felt flustered and embarrassed. "You are right I do love Lauren. Love for me means forgiveness. Just because she has acted badly doesn't change the fact I still have feelings for her."

She sighed deeply so you still love her even after all that has happened?"

"Yes I can't deny that I still have feelings for her. Siobhan I am not taking her back, but I do still have feelings and I always will."

She was shaking her head and bit her lip thoughtfully. "As I said I am sorry. Shit I didn't think she would try to kill herself."

I wiped up the coffee. "God I never thought you could be so vindictive Siobhan."

"I know I am not proud either. I regret it now but you didn't seem to be doing anything about it and I wanted to get back at them. It wasn't right that they disrespected you in front of everyone. They were the malicious ones."

"Two wrongs don't make a right baby. Shit why did you do it?"

She threw her arms in the air and hissed angrily. "Because I love you that's why. I fucking love you and it hurt like hell watching them shit all over you day after fucking day. Watching you just take it pissed me off I could see how upset you were. They were behaving like bitches. It wasn't right. So I figured if you weren't going to act then I fucking would."

I flopped back. "But I thought you were in love with Maddy?"

The tears were flowing and she was obviously hurting. "Kelli I love you I always have. I watched the love you shared with Lauren from the outside and it amazed me. I have never experienced or even seen love like that before and I guess I was jealous. I wanted you to feel that way about me."

My frustration overflowed and I gasped. "But what about Maddy?"

Her head turned away no longer able to look at me. "I didn't want to be your second choice. I wanted you to love me the way you love her."

"Siobhan you didn't answer my question."

She sighed with a resigned sad look on her face. "Maddy is gorgeous and sexy and I yes I do like her. But she is way out of my league she doesn't love me. It's fun and she is a bloody sex maniac but no she doesn't love me and really I don't feel that way about her either. It's just fun she is in a whole different league to me when we are out together everyone looks at her and goes wow. Nobody even looks at me. For all intents and purposes I don't even exist."

"So what is happening between you?"

I don't know Kelli. I get the feeling she is already seeing someone else. Which is OK I mean we never made any commitments to each other. She is free to do that."

"If that's the case what happens next?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know." It sounded final, like a death knell.

We sat for a while just thinking I suppose. We acknowledged each other but we were in our own separate little worlds.

"I still don't understand why you did it."

"I just wanted them to suffer the way I saw you suffer every day."

She turned her head away. "Do you want me to resign? I will if that's what you want."

I was horrified. "God no don't be stupid. I am not happy with your actions but resignation won't fix it."

"Then what do you want me to do?"

"I think for the time being we just try to keep a lid on it. There's nothing to be gained from telling Lauren."

That night as I lay in bed tossing and turning the phone rang. It was Lauren and she wanted to talk. She talked about everything and nothing. "Where's Alecia and Josh?"

She giggled. "They are in bed."

"So why aren't you with them? I thought he was the bee's knees?"

She sighed. "I don't know baby, since the other day all I can think about is you and me and lately things have been weird between Alecia and I. She has been distant and moody. It's like there is something she wants to say but can't or won't. I have tried to get her to open up but she just closes up more. Kelli I think It is you. She is lost without you here with us. When you left it really hurt her she hated taking Josh on the cruise. That cruise was just for you. It was supposed to be your gift. She wanted to share that with you."

"So what you are saying is things aren't all sunshine and roses?"

That drew a haughty sigh from her. "No everything is fine I just think Alecia misses you."

"Lauren you have to sort out your own problems now."

"I know but, baby we are meant to be together forever. You can't tell me you don't feel it. I know you do. It was in the kiss the other day."

"Lauren I have never denied that I love you."

"Baby if that's the case then why not come home? We both want you to be with us. We both love you."

I laughed. "Do you Lauren? I have heard you say it a lot. You say it over and over. I am sure in your own way you probably do, but you chose Josh. You knew how I felt about him but decided to do it anyway. I am sorry Lauren as much as I love you I would never contemplate living there while he is there. Kick Josh out and then call me."

I could hear her breathing but she didn't talk for a very long minute. "Kelli this is what I meant the other day. Baby you seem so strong and so powerful when it comes to work. You are totally fearless. Yet when it comes to us you are a complete coward, you won't even try."

"I don't know how many times I have to say it, but I will try again. I AM NOT INTO MEN!"

"Baby Josh told me that when he kissed you that you were into it as much as he was. He felt there was real chemistry between you. So what changed?"

"I have told you, Josh was just an experiment. Yes I kissed him, but that's all we did."

"Did you enjoy the kiss?"

I didn't want to answer this because I knew she wouldn't be able to leave it alone. "Yes Lauren I enjoyed the kiss, but I realised that it wasn't what I wanted."

She giggled. "Did you get hard? Did it excite you?"

Now it was my turn to hold the phone unspeaking. I sighed. "Yes Lauren I enjoyed it and yes it excited me."

"If that's the case baby what is the problem? Why won't you even try? Haven't you ever thought maybe I should just do it?"

"Lauren he never cared about me. All he wanted was you."

She started to cry. "Babe that wasn't his fault it was mine. I told him you were into it. He thought we were all going to be together."

"Oh my god don't be ridiculous Lauren. He knew damned well at the party that I wasn't happy. He knew and decided to ignore my feelings. From the moment he met you all he wanted was you."

"No babe you have got it all wrong. He was worried about why you were ignoring him. He wanted to leave and give it all away but I convinced him that once we got home away from prying eyes you would let the real Kelli out. He really likes you baby. He feels really bad about what happened."

"Say what you like Lauren but I will never change my mind about him."

We talked and talked long into the early hours of the morning and it was so nice to talk to her without yelling and screaming. I woke in the morning feeling exhausted.

I was barely in the door of my office carrying coffee for everyone when Maddy walked in as well. I wasn't sure what to say. After Siobhan's revelations I felt a little uneasy. She looked at me and threw her arms around my neck and kissed me. Nothing was said for ages we just hugged. Siobhan walked in while we were still cuddling followed closely by Candy. We all ended up in a huge group hug.