All Comments on 'Case of the Murdered Bride Ch. 04'

by WifeWatchman

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  • 8 Comments
tranzmanytranzmanyover 9 years ago
Wonderful!

A great case again! I really enjoy your complicated stories, this one definitely fell into that category. I look forward to seeing where you are going with this and when Don will face off head on with the four. The game is most definitely on.

LeFrog08LeFrog08over 9 years ago
So it was Atkins....

I picked up a few clues about him 2 chapters ago, but I still wasn't certain of his guilt.

I'm pleased that I was proven right in this case, since I don't always connect all the dots like the "Crow-Bar" does.... Well done, sir!

WifeWatchmanWifeWatchmanover 9 years agoAuthor
Congratulations to those that got it

Yes, Atkins was the killer, but those that said Blair were right, too. What better way to have twists and turns and possibly contradicting clues than to have both responsible... :o)

KidCreoleKidCreoleover 9 years ago
One not so small error

I really liked the story, and I usually overlook factual errors that are necessary in order to get to the story's conclusion. But this one is so glaring, that your "surprise ending" could not happen. You stated that 2 hours after Atkins confessed and took the deal, Blair took a deal for 20 years and told the Crowbar why he killed her. If Blair confessed to double murder (he is legally liable to both under the felony murder rule), he would never have left the jail, could not have committed suicide in his home, and could not be planning a future with Lang. He could have committed suicide in prison and the message from Karen, or whoever, that was passed on through the phone call could have been passed on by a guard (these people appear to be powerful enough), however, then Crowbar would have not got the information about the message being passed on. (This is sometimes the problem with being a lawyer and reading or watching something that has to do with the law.) Otherwise, great story.

WifeWatchmanWifeWatchmanover 9 years agoAuthor
To KidCreole

Not sure if you got the timelines right, but I do agree that there was one glaring omission that I realized after publishing the story (and it's so hard to edit a story once it's published, that I don't even try). Yes, Blair had confessed and taken the plea deal, so how was he out of jail? Because sometimes people are out on (a lot of) bail and ankle monitored after they make their plea deal and have their hearing, so that they can get their affairs in order before reporting to prison. I should've made that more clear.

Ravey19Ravey19over 2 years ago

Yes, I questioned why Blair was at home rather than in jail but take your point. Another gripping instalment.

WhitewaterbumWhitewaterbum11 months ago

I got the killer wrong but had the right reasons on how Atkins killed Diane and Tom. Partially right on Blair, oh well , on to next story.🙁

chytownchytown8 months ago

***Thanks for sharing.

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In an exercise of pure censorship, Literotica published all 5 chapters of my story "Climate Injustice" and then removed them, saying the readers of their explicit sex site(!) want safe spaces from politics(!!) I have published "Climate Injustice" on my Patreon site where the ...

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