All Comments on 'Cemetery Summons Ch. 05'

Galloglaich

This length of a chapter is much better then the last one. I have little to no complaints if you can keep each chapter to this size, but im only one critic lol. Could you explore more on the history of the demonesses? Jack is transforming but into what a inccumbus? How is this possible when he has not given up his soul, and he has no demon blood in him unless there is somthing in has past family roots? Could you expand on what kind of demonesses there are? Can you have almost human demonessess? Say for instant 5/6 human 4/6 human? As in traceing bloodlines from different races. As we have in reallife? Perhaps incorperate the other supernatural creature more? If you are going to do this try developing the story more as is. Then when it feels right add this extra stuff in. Also try to explain Elassa's hunger/need for seamen or perhaps explain why she thought he was teaseing her. For this story to continue it needs more substance. Also you could possibly be getting away from what is thought of as a traditional succubus, but i enjoy it as is. Liberal thoughts are never wrong so long as they dont poorly effect others :) Also try to stay consistant with each character. Try going back into the previous chapters and then to this latest one. Look to where you think this story has headed, and continue to plot its course. Thanks again for a good story. It needs work, but its atleast a diamond in the rough. Again im only one critic.

I'll post more latter on my thoughts. Though since im post as A/N Anyone can come in and say its me. ;/.

This reminds me. Try looking up other stories involving succubus. Hell's Housewife is one i did not mind reading, but the author just stopped.... Look anywhere you want. You have not listed what your not into. So i dont know what to not suggest. Also do you want to explore the possibility of jack starting a faimly? Having chrildren with his succubus, and they some how have to get through life as humans? Maybe with demon powers?

reading this makes me want a succubus too. where can i get one?

Keep up the good work! I like how you are only explaining little bits at a time to make the story more suspenseful in a way, making us guess as to what will happen.

One of the best series I've read in a long time,keep them coming.

It is now 5:43am and I am still wanting to read! This series makes me wonder if i could really summon an my own sexual fiend. A male version of Elassa would be just what the doctor ordered! Oh GOD yes!! I will finish reading after a nap...I feel like I was the one getting all that young boy's seed!

not to long or short ;-]

great work hope you keep at it

I think your doing a wonderful job :)

Very interesting story but I am as confused as Jack is....what the hell is going on?

This is hot and entertaining. Their relationship confuses me a little with how abusive they are to each other but I suspect that's my problem. Some editing issues including homonyms and the funniest of all he continued his 'menstruation.' Freakin Hilarious. I believe you meant ministrations. I don't think you meant to comment on his time of the month. 🤣

I haven't commented on all of your stories but I just wanted to take a moment to let you know how much I love your work! This is my second time reading your cementary summons series and it won't be the last time, I only wish there was more. Although the ending is quite satisfying. After this read through I think I'll check out more of your work.

I'm confused chapter 2 his in the hospital chapter 3 his home plus I thought he was going to be a character that I liked but your changing him to one hate, I liked him at first but now I don't

Enjoying the story, but I don't understand his lack of a reaction to Elassa putting him in the hospital. He should be upset with her. Wonder about his regeneration. Maybe try to understand why she was upset. Some normal reactions that are missing!

Wow... He's supposed to own her and yet she nearly kills him and there is zero repercussions? Not even an explanation FFS? That there is some awful writing.

Great story so far... Except for that giant black hole. And a few minor details. But that one is literally story breaking.