All Comments on 'Chained'

by Valkyrie897

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  • 10 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 5 years ago
Utter Bollocks

Before I quit the story I made it as far as the weirdo kidnapper killing a random stranger?? WTF? I noticed in the other comments that there were multiple killings....again I wonder WTF?

Perhaps if it had a different setting, a post apocalypse environment where killing to survive wouldn’t be amiss, instead of a guy having a long weekend off work. I find it hard to believe that a woman goes from my weirdo supervisor kidnapped me, drugged me and stripped me to hi handsome lets fuck. I can get behind the idea of cooperating in a bid to escape alive but FFS she’s happily fucking a mass murderer without any concern that (a) she could be next or (b) she’s officially an accomplice.

One thing seems clear this pair of sociopaths deserve each other.

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
More please

Keep it coming please

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
Really

Bit of a 50 shades rip off to me

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
Unsure

All the killings were just creepy. I don't understand why you would even include those in the story. I also didn't enjoy the constant shift in personalities in both the characters, it left me a little confused. But some parts of the story were great. This is my first time reading your work, I can't wait to read the others.

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago

Loved this!

Passionflower74Passionflower74over 6 years ago
Please add more!

Sexy story! Was a great read. Enjoyed myself very much! Thank you!! Breathlessly waiting for it to continue! Please!!

avengilineavengilineover 6 years ago
Why the killings?

She was threatened...so breaking necks was the way to go? That's just creepy. Why did he need to kill 4 people? That's not sexy or cute or even remotely attractive.

sluttykitty98sluttykitty98over 6 years ago
Constructive critism

The dialogue is a bit robotic, unless that is what you were going for, and i think you could use a bit less detail about mundane things, such as the food. for example, i don't think it adds to the story to have him eat boiled asparagus instead of carrots.

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
Just a suggestion

You should watch "Dr. Marston and the wonder women" cause "d.i.s.c theory" might interest you

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago

PleSe please please write more

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userValkyrie897@Valkyrie897
I'm just an amateur writer that likes to do erotic short stories. My stories are written to appeal to Kinksters, and uploaded to Fetlife.

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