by cadet1972
GREAT Story!! This was a GREAT first write on Literotica!!!
That's one of the sexiest stories I've ever read on here. I don't usually even think to leave comments, but I had to on this one. Wow.
Redundancy, mixture of tenses .... your grammar is so poor as to make reading your story painful. It might be a good story .... but I just can not read something so poorly crafted.