Cheating May Not Work Out

Jenna said, "I love. In the last four years I've only had sex with Kathy, no one else and no men."

My mind was swimming. "So, if I understand, both of you are willing to accept me and love me. I can be physically expressive with each of you?"

"Only when you can say what you mean and mean what you say when you tell us you love us. Over the next months you'll have plenty of opportunities to choose to love us both."

"All the thoughts I've been having about what to say to Colleen on the ride home just changed." I sat quietly until Kathy served the French Toast. I had already loaded syrup, butter, peanut butter, preserves, coffee and plates on the island. She served me first. I accepted the plate and passed it to Jenna. I said, "I'm just old fashioned enough to still want it to be "ladies first" often." Jenna took the plate, put butter and the syrup on the French Toast and took her first bite. Kathy handed me a plate with three slices on it, cut into triangles.

I put peanut butter and a little syrup on the slices and took my first bite.

"How did you know?" Jenna asked.

"Know what?" I asked.

"Dad's the only one we know who uses peanut butter on pancakes, waffles and French Toast."

I said, "My Dad taught me. Mom thought we were both gross."

"The same word Mom uses." Kathy said.

After breakfast I realized I didn't need to pack. Everything of mine could stay. That gave us some extra time before I had to go. We sat in the living room and Jenna turned on the stereo low. The first song that played was "Weave Me the Sunshine" by Peter, Paul and Mary. I sat on the couch and they moved me to the middle. Kathy to one side of me and Jenna to the other.

Kathy held my hand and asked, "Are you attracted to Jenna?"

Jenna lifted my semi-hard penis with her hand and said, "There is evidence that he is."

"I'm attracted to both of you, and you know it! I'm wrapping my head around the new game. It's so much different than the old game."

Jenna kept her hand around my cock and said, "The old game is called serial monogamy. The new game is called polyamory. We have lots more freedom in polyamory."

"It isn't an open relationship?"

"No. People did that back in the sixties. Go to a concert and spread your legs, smoke pot and fuck. We don't play that game. As adults we came together to love each other and include possibly people whenever we found people who could and would open themselves up to an expanded love, not just sex. A committed love, with respect, joy, full self-expression and support. Kathy and I believe you can be a fit. Deciding to fit and then fitting are up to you." Jenna said.

I said, "You're talking about all of us being lovers, actually spouses. I've known Kathy for over ten years. How long should it take for me to fall in love with you?"

Kathy said, "You didn't fall in love with me. I woke you up to already loving me. Now, hold Jenna in your lap. Wrap your arms around her." She crawled into my lap and I wrapped my arms around her.

"Close your eyes. Feel her energy, her warmth and the tension in her."

What I felt was surrender. After some time she turned slowly and we kissed. Often I have kissed someone and thought about their lips, their breasts against my chest, the press of their body against mine, but not in that kiss. I was aware of kissing her for the first few seconds, then I was the kiss. I cannot properly describe it. English fails to communicate some concepts very well.

Jenna and I were not two people kissing, thinking about what's next, what this kiss means or worried about what Kathy was thinking as we kissed. We just kissed. My processes paused and thinking stopped. In hind-sight I can only say all that was there was our connection.

I heard Jenna say, "He gets it."

My eyes opened and I said, "I love both of you. I choose to love you."

An alarm sounded somewhere in the house and Kathy jumped up. "You need to dress and go to LAX!" We ran to the bedroom and I dressed. Levis 501's, boots and ranger belt topped by my teal Wrangler shirt.

Kathy asked, "Please don't dress like that at work. I'd soak through my clothes in a minute!"

Jenna stood and looked at the label inside my shirt. She said, "Hey, Sis, wanna go shopping?"

"Can we?" Kathy asked. "Can we buy you a few things?"

"If it pleases you. Please, no pink or pastels." I got kissed by both women and then I said, "My car is at my house. Want to drive me home in skin?"

We laughed and they both dressed in less than two minutes. As we headed for the garage Jenna said, "There are clothes in my closet."

"I noticed them yesterday."

"I mean the big, manly clothes."

"I mean the feminine clothes. I'll make you a deal. I promise not to wear any of your clothes."

"What about us wearing your shirts?" Kathy asked.

"There's something quite sexy about a woman wearing a masculine shirt as long as it's all she's wearing. I'd like that."

Jenna drove her SUV and Kathy sat in back with me. When we got to Colleen's house Jenna asked, "Sis, have you been inside?"

"No, and I'm not going inside. Our agreement is that this is Colleen's house. She's not coming to my home. I'm not going into hers."

I kissed them both, opened my garage door and went inside. I grabbed a diet Coke and headed for LAX. I pulled out of the garage at 1500 (3pm).

Colleen comes Home

I stopped at the curb at 1530 (3:30pm) and in two minutes Colleen came out the doors pulling her suitcase. She was wearing a nice floral print dress that was a bit short and cut a bit low as well. Her heels clacked on the sidewalk and drew attention to her. I put her suitcase in the trunk and took her in my arms. I wrapped her in my arms and kissed her soundly. A tap on my shoulder and a baritone voice said, "Take her home and kiss her there, please." I smiled at the big cop and we got in the car.

Colleen was quiet until I was outside LAX. Once I was on Century she said, "I didn't know what to expect. Thank you."

"Didn't you get my message? I thought I was clear enough for both you and Stan."

"Oh, your message was clear, but unexpected and much gentler than I ever would have imagined."

"If I was still trapped in the old game I would have been very different. I can't say exactly what my reaction would have been, but I guarantee you wouldn't be as well taken care of and worry free when you came home as you can be now."

"What happened?"

"Do you know what the occurring world is?"

"I can guess. It's not the real world it's the world the way we make it up."

"Yeah, like that. When I was a kid I thought girls were yucky. They weren't interested in baseball, football, riding bikes or any of the things I was interested in. In my world girls were yucky. When I was twenty the world had changed. Girls were no longer yucky. You looked good, smelled good, moved with magic and I no longer thought girls were yucky. Did the world change? Did all the girls change? No. The way the world occurred to me changed, inside my head."

"It happened to us, didn't it?"

"From before we met until about a year ago the world of relationships occurred to us as monogamy. You and me. Mister and missus. Is that the only way relationships work? No, but in our world that was the only place we looked."

"Then Stan showed up. I wasn't looking for him. I tried not to be attracted to him." She nodded as she spoke.

"The world where Stan occurs is a new world for you. Five years ago he still would have been there, but not occurring as a possibility. Last week Kathy came to work just like she has for ten years. I saw her as an attractive woman, a great assistant and I saw her occurring as off limits, too young, not my spouse. Now, she occurs as a great assistant and a woman I love."

"You love her?" I could hear emotions in her voice and a glance at her showed emotions on her face. She was worried.

"You just went back to the old occurring world of monogamy! Stop! In the monogamy world you can't love or have sex with Stan because you belong to me. Stan has to leave his wife to love you. I have to leave you to love Kathy. We don't live in that world any longer. In this world you can come home to me, having just spent four days in bed with Stan and love me when you get here. You can love Stan AND love me. I can spend the night with Kathy loving her and come home and love you. There's no conflict! The more we love, the more love there is."

"I know we just did what you said, but it still sounds crazy."

"It sounds crazy to my monogamous mind, but when I think with my polyamorus mind it makes perfect sense. It isn't about right or wrong or even about limitations. It's about context. Is a volleyball right or wrong?"

"Huh? A volleyball's just a volleyball." Colleen said.

"It's right if it's on a volleyball court and wrong on a bowling alley."

"I see. We're still a couple, just not a monogamous couple." She nodded.

"We have freedom that other couples don't. Let's say I didn't know about Stan. When you got on Southwest a week ago you were thinking about being in bed with him. You thought about how exciting it would be and you thought about how to keep it a secret. Words like guilt, trust and cheating were on your mind. How different would this car ride be if you had spent four days and nights having sex with Stan and you didn't know if I knew?"

"God! I'd be terrified you'd know, that you'd find out! I'd be scared."

"The world that occurs for you now has the freedom for you to love Stan and love me."

"Would you do me a favor? Hurry a little faster. I want to get home and into bed with you."

"About fifty yards behind me is a black and white car with an L.A.P.D. logo on the door. I'm going just as fast as I can without needing to have a conversation with him."

Her hand went onto my thigh, right where my hand had been on Kathy's thigh earlier in the week. Colleen stayed quiet as I paid attention to my driving. When I hit the button and our garage door opened Colleen asked, "Can I start getting undressed now?"

"No! We're going to our bedroom and I am undressing you. Then we're going to play. After, I'll bring in your suitcase and help you unpack. After."

"Yes Sir, Mr. Peterson." She smiled at me and squeezed my thigh.

I was well trained by my Dad. From the time I turned twelve I opened doors for women. Doors to houses, businesses, cars, rooms or wherever. Colleen opened her car door and got out. I was amazed. In one week her expectation had changed and she no longer expected me to open her door, even though I had been doing it for years.

I got out of the car and went to the door to the house. I unlocked it and held it open for her. She made it into the kitchen and stopped. She turned back to face me and said, "I'm sorry. For a week I was living in a hotel and stopped expecting someone to open the door."

"Would you like me to stop opening doors for you? I can stop, if that's what you'd prefer." She rushed to me and both hugged and kissed me.

"Don't stop! I feel your love when you do things like that."

"Ok." I gently pushed her towards our bedroom. When we were there she said, "You slept here once while I was gone."

"Yes, I did. Kathy has never been in our house. She swore she was never coming into this house. To quote her, "That house is Colleen's, and I'm not going inside. Our agreement is that this is Colleen's house. She's not coming to my home. I'm not going into hers."

"I promise Stan isn't coming in here either. I liked what you said Kathy said, that this is my house, but she's wrong. This is our home. Her home may be her home that she may choose to share with you, but this is our home."

"I hear you." I reached behind her and her zipper made a noise as it was pulled down. She asked, "Do you like this dress? I bought it yesterday to wear when I came home."

"I like it! It looks good on you and it comes off easily."

Under the dress she wore suspender hose, a thong and a new bra. I could tell the thong was moist, if not wet. I noticed the thong had been put on after the suspender hose. We could remove the thong and leave the suspender hose if we wanted to. I said, "For all our health, you and I will use condoms every time we join until each of us is tested and certified disease free. As we said in the military, trust and verify."

"I assume you have some condoms."

"A few." I pointed at the bedside table. Colleen opened the drawer and saw a selection of about twenty condoms of different brands and colors. She asked, "What color would you like right now?"

"Ladies choice." She picked one and spent some time getting it open and then time getting it on me. The fact that she had problems getting it on me made me feel like she wasn't practiced at the use of condoms. A good sign.

The thong came off and my fingers found all the signs that her parts had sustained no damage while she was gone. Our loving was loving, a little different than before her trip and my adventure, but still an expression of loving.

We redressed after a short rest and got Colleen all moved back in, laundry started and then we thought about lists. A list of things that needed doing to get ready for the next week, shopping lists, things we need to discuss lists. When the laundry was done, the trash was out in the alley, yard taken care of and pool filter cleaned I said, "May I take you to dinner?"

"Can we stop at the market on the way home from dinner?"

"Sure. It usually costs more when we shop together, but that's Ok with me."

We dressed. I redressed in my western gear and Colleen dressed in southern California casual clothes. Her new dress and things had gone into the laundry.

We went to Shoreline Village in Long Beach and had a great dinner at the Lighthouse. I love sea food and so does Colleen. She ordered a salad with grilled salmon on top and I ordered the clam chowder. We watched boats going into the marina as we ate.

When we went to the market we laughed and touched often. Our affection was shared and enjoyed by both of us. All my thoughts about our emotional "stuff" about being with other lovers disappeared. I thought about Kathy often, but none of the thoughts were barriers to being with Colleen. Colleen picked up some packaged chili mix and I wondered if Kathy would like it. I also wondered if Jenna would like it.

We naturally enjoyed being together Saturday night. There was no effort in it. We slept late Sunday morning largely because we stayed awake late Saturday night. When I got up Sunday morning I needed to open the windows and air out our bedroom. It had all the smells one would expect from a room where lovers live.

We used Sunday to do the things we normally did around our home. I cared for the yard and our cars, first. While I did that Colleen made sure we both had everything we'd need to get through the week. She noticed the suits that were missing as well as shirts, etc. I know because she said, "Walt, you need to get at least three new suits and a few new shirts. Having clothes in two homes means you need more."

Two hours later she asked if I wanted to buy the new clothes with her or have Kathy help me buy them. I wondered for half a minute if her question was meant to imply that I needed the help of a woman or I'd be incapable of getting an acceptable suit. I decided it was safer if I decided that she believed both she and Kathy would enjoy shopping for clothes with me. Maybe not together, you understand, but each would enjoy the shopping.

Being a diplomat at the novice level I said, "There's no real rush so maybe next weekend or sometime in the next few weeks, the shopping will happen."

Colleen nodded and went back to whatever she had been doing. We cooked dinner together and ate out on our deck. As we cleaned up and did the dishes Colleen said, "While you're at work tomorrow, plan on Memorial Day weekend. I don't know how much of the weekend Stan can spend with me, but you and Kathy should be able to make some plans. She can go with you to the cemetery, too. It's an important side of you."

"Even without knowing how much of that weekend you'll get with Stan you give Kathy and me the whole thing?"

"There may be times when Kathy isn't available and Stan is. Will that mean I can't go with him?"

"No. You're right. It would be best if it always worked out even, but odds are good it won't. Thank you. I'll talk with her tomorrow."

"You can call her now, if you'd like." She picked up our portable phone and extended it towards me.

I shook my head. "No thanks. I want to be with you when I'm with you. It will need to be a big emergency for me to contact Kathy during our time."

"I agree. Things are different with Stan. I don't want to call him and have his wife answer."

I waited almost a minute then asked, "Do you think he's going to tell his wife about the two of you?"

"We talked about it. He's over ninety percent sure she'd freak and throw him out if he brings it up. It will surprise me if he tells her."

"I don't know her, but I believe for most women the reaction gets more drastic, more violent to the marriage, the longer the affair has gone on. I think he should tell her. Even if it ends their marriage, it will be less emotional, less bloody, if he tells her now."

"I agree, but it has to be his decision. Doesn't it?"

"Depends. If he tells and their marriage ends, what are you prepared to do? Are you going with him? Do you want him to move in here and me move out? Do you want him to get an apartment and you keep seeing him and living with me? If he tells and when he tells are his decisions, but how you deal with the aftermath, are your decisions." I paused, then said, "And I've already told both of you what my reaction has to be if you get caught. I won't be humiliated."

"What if she's Ok with him having a lover?" Colleen asked.

"You say he's ninety percent sure she's going to explode. He knows her pretty well. She may decide it's Ok for you to have sex with her husband, but I'm not counting on it. Most of America is against polyamory or for serial monogamy. If she's willing to stay married to him, I'd bet she wants you gone from his life. If she's your age she's spent over forty years being indoctrinated in monogamy and maybe even a church. She may want you fired from McKensie. Then you're facing another decision you may not have considered. I am in love with Kathy. Kathy is my lover. Neither of those statements is contingent on you and Stan being lovers. If Stan goes back to serial monogamy with her, what are you going to do?"

There was a long pause. Colleen sat with her hands in her lap and her eyes on her hands. I stayed quiet. She hadn't thought about that possibility.

Finally she looked up and said, "When you're with Kathy I don't want to be alone."

"So, when Stan breaks up with you, you're going hunting. I'm glad I bought lots of condoms. While you look and while you settle on a lover we will always have safe sex. I will not be eating your pussy. Figure bareback and oral are gone for this year, if you find a new lover before June." I took a breath. "God, I hope she keeps him. Then its just condoms until October."

"I don't think we thought this through enough." Colleen said.

"Kathy did."

"Kathy knew Stan and I wanted to get together?"

"No. Kathy knew she wanted me for her lover. She was unwilling to do anything to get between us. A week ago I thought she was the best assistant in the company, but I had no idea she was in love with me, or lusted after me. You opened the door and she accepted the invitation."

"I opened the door?"

"When I found out that you were publically kissing Stan and had your hand in his lap, you opened the door. My first thoughts were about getting proof and divorcing you. I wanted you served as the two of you got off the plane. Kathy showed me another way. I get to keep loving you and I get to love Kathy, too."