Christmas Cookies

Author's note: This is a slow build romance between a brother and sister.

Jason, a 22-year-old Marine, returns to Texas to visit his sister, Rowan, while trying to keep a shameful secret hidden. Rowan is glad to have him all to herself for Christmas, but things take an unexpected turn.

~***~

Rowan wrung her hands together as she waited by a huge decorated tree in the middle of the airport. The familiar sound of 1950s Christmas music played over the loudspeaker, all but drowned out by the sound of cheerful and exhausted people scrambling to get where they were headed.

It had been an entire year since she'd seen her older brother.

She perked up, a wide smile stretching across her face when she spotted the handsome Marine among a mass of chattering people exiting a plane. He was easy to find in a crowd. His broad frame towered over most others and commanded a presence that people made room for.

She ran to him, unable to wait for a second longer. His eyes met hers just before she reached him. The grinning soldier dropped his duffel bag and opened his arms to embrace her. She reached her arms around his waist, squeezing tight. The shuffle of the busy airport that surrounded them faded into the background. After a long welcome, she pulled back to face him. Her fingertips brushed across his cheekbone. New scars, small but noticeable, speckled his tanned skin from his cheek to his eyebrow.

When he'd been injured this past January, she'd tried to come visit him but he'd told her not to waste her time. It wasn't a big deal.

"Ah, I know. Took a bit of shrapnel. I'm ugly now," Jason joked.

His voice was low and reverberant; a gravelly sound that pierced through her skin and curved along her bones. Hearing it in person was so much better than hearing it on the phone.

"Not at all. It's not fair that scars look so hot on a guy."

Jason reached down to retrieve his bag, a slight blush appearing on his cheeks. His dark eyes flashed under his heavy brows.

"So what you been up to, Ro?"

"Mm, not much, I guess. I started decorating but then I thought you'd want to help me. Do you need me to carry anything?"

"Nah. I travel light."

Jason rested one hand on the strap of his tan camo backpack as he swung his duffel up with the other. They made their way to the front of the airport.

"I can't believe Mom didn't stick around to see me," Jason said. "She picks now to take off with her new boyfriend?"

"Would you pass up a Christmas vacation in Puerto Rico?" Rowan laughed, jamming her hands into the pockets of her jacket.

"I haven't seen her since last year!"

That was his fault since he'd skipped this Thanksgiving (and last Thanksgiving, for that matter), but Rowan kept that thought to herself.

"Who is this guy anyway?"

"Alejandro," she emphasized his name with an accent, "is a very nice guy, actually. A little young for Mom if you ask me. But, whatever, she's having the time of her life. He's from Vieques and wanted to introduce her to his family. I think it's sweet. And besides, this means I get you all to myself this week."

Rowan couldn't help but smile as she and her brother exited through the garland-draped doors and stepped into the mild Texas weather. Jason paused on the busy walkway, his eyes glowing in the late afternoon sun.

"Feels like home," he exhaled.

=-=-=

Jason dumped his bags next to the front door and took in his surroundings. Rowan had warned him of the place's size, but he was still shocked. The main room was split in half by a kitchen counter, the only counter in said kitchen, and barely had enough space for the single loveseat, small tv, and simple black coffee table that looked like it'd been picked up at a junkyard. Other than the unsightly furniture, Ro had spruced the place up with statement art (probably painted by the local artists she'd mentioned befriending). The plants, wicker lamps, and mismatched throws and pillows gave the room a homey vibe.

"I can't believe you've never seen my apartment before!" Rowan said.

"I can't believe I've never been to Austin before."

"Better music scene. One of the best. I mean, you know I love San Antonio, but it was getting kind of stale playing the same old bars all the time."

Rowan had relocated to Austin to pursue her music career after she graduated from high school two years ago. The two hadn't talked as frequently in that time. They'd always been close—inseparable in their younger years—but Jason had been having a rough go of it ever since his buddy, Mac, died in combat. He wasn't there with him when it happened, but losing the kid had spawned a deluge of issues, new and old.

Jason felt guilty for letting the distance grow between himself and his sister. He knew she hated it. This Christmas nearly fell in the way of Thanksgiving—completely bypassed. But Rowan had called and given him an earful, and he wasn't one to deny her. He knew it would be difficult to be here, for a week, no less, but after the mess he'd made of last Christmas...

"How's it going? Did you ever start that band?" Jason slipped out of his jacket.

"No, not exactly. There's a handful of people that I play with regularly, but we're not a band. I get a pretty good crowd at my gigs nowadays, so I'm going to stick to the solo act for now."

"You making good money yet?" Jason asked as he dropped onto the loveseat and stretched out his cramped legs.

Ro shrugged. "Not good enough. Still got my day job. Hey, don't get too comfortable. We've got a tree to put up."

"What? I just got here!"

International travel was always a hassle, but the three flights Jason had to take from the base in Japan had been particularly harrowing. There'd been considerable storms and turbulence on the way home, not to mention the nervous flier seated next to him on the last flight. The man had gotten foolishly drunk and gasped and groaned at every rattle of the plane.

But when all was said and done, Jason felt a million times more relaxed in Rowan's presence. And he'd been worried he'd be on edge this year.

Of course he'd missed her. Her sunny smile, her big blue eyes, the adoration in them when she looked at him.

He always felt this way when he came home for the holidays. It wasn't Texas he looked forward to, or his mother's house, or even his mother. It was her. As soon as Rowan wrapped her arms around him, he was home.

"You're going to put me to work already?" he continued to complain. It wasn't a real complaint, of course. Jason would do anything for Ro.

"You bet your ass I am."

Rowan disappeared from Jason's view and then reemerged from the adjacent kitchen with two bottles of beer in her hand. She handed one to her brother.

Jason frowned. "Where did you get that? You're not allowed to drink yet. You're twenty."

"I work in bars. Sometimes I get tipped with alcohol." She smirked. "Sometimes I just take it."

"Fine." Jason returned her smile as he twisted the cap off. "I am at your service. Where are we going to put it? This apartment is tiny."

Jason had only been in his sister's apartment for a few minutes and already he was feeling claustrophobic. He was sympathetic to Rowan's financial situation. Guilty, even. She'd told him before she hadn't expected Austin to be so much more expensive than their hometown. The studio apartment was all she could afford and she was still struggling to make ends meet. He wished he could send her money but the truth was, he didn't have much to spare.

"Hey, don't knock my tiny apartment! You don't know it yet."

"You don't even have room for a real couch!"

"Yeah, I guess we could've stayed in San Antonio, but I just felt weird staying at home without Mom."

"No, I'm just teasing. It looks great. You have it fixed up real nice. Besides, it's not like I have to sleep here."

Rowan's face went slack.

"You could sleep on the couch," she suggested, an apology in her voice.

He didn't have to ask why she looked so guilt-stricken. When he'd warned her months before that he might not be able to make it home for Christmas, he explained that money was tight, which was partly true. Money for the flight, and now the cost of the hotel—an expense he'd never had before—it was difficult to save up for, he'd told her. She wasn't going to let it go, though. A few days later, he received a cash gift from his mother. It didn't take a genius to put two and two together.

Jason's laugh ripped through the compact space. "That couch is way too fucking small for me to sleep on."

Rowan rolled her eyes as she started for the boxed Christmas tree and a bin of decorations that she had stashed in the corner.

"I'm sure you've slept in worse places."

"That's true," he mumbled.

Attempting to lift the top half of the fake tree out of its box, Rowan stumbled back, teetering under the cumbersome weight.

Jason cackled.

She was a tiny thing, absolutely adorable. Her small frame wobbling under the (still small but not so much compared to her) fake tree was too cute to save her from. Finally, she turned to glare at him.

"What are you waiting for, you big dummy? Get over here!"

Several beers later the siblings stepped back to admire their handiwork. Not only had they hung decorations on the quaint tree, but they had placed the little trinkets around the apartment they'd found in the bottom of the bin—items that had been salvaged from the last time their mom had attempted to do some "spring cleaning." Icicle lights, garland, stockings, and a wreath had been hung. The apartment sparkled with memories of their childhood.

Wrapping a throw around her shoulders, Rowan finished off her third beer and set the bottle on the coffee table. Jason sank back into the sofa. She curled up on his lap, her arms around his neck. The sudden intimacy surprised Jason, but his arms returned the embrace without hesitation, as if they were running on muscle memory. He breathed in the sweet almond scent of her hair. It'd been a long time since the pair had been this close. He let himself relax. Melt into her.

~***~

Solid arms enveloped her, caressing her atop the throw blanket, making her feel small and safe. Rowan nuzzled her face into the warmth of Jason's neck. Savoring the moment, she rested her eyes and breathed in the musky scent of his cologne.

She knew it might feel strange for Jason, having long since forced herself to stop this childish habit of clinging to her big brother, but she couldn't help herself. The alcohol in her blood, the twinkling glow from the tree, the way his presence put her at ease and equally excited her...

She'd missed him so much. She just wanted to feel the heat from his skin, to let the familiar scent of him fill her with joy. A joy that she'd been deprived of for too long.

"I bet you're hungry," she said reluctantly, giving him—or herself—an excuse to separate.

Jason groaned. "Oh, god, I miss your cooking." But his arms wrapped tighter around her.

"I missed you." She kissed him gently on the cheek.

"I missed you, too." Fingers brushed Rowan's hair. The motion sent tingles down her spine.

"Oh, no!" Rowan shouted in a sudden outburst.

"What?" Jason's breath quickened as he adjusted under Ro's legs. "Sorry."

She didn't know what he was apologizing for.

"It got late so fast! What time was your check-in supposed to be?"

"Oh, I don't know." Jason exhaled. He reached for his phone. Rowan grudgingly rose from her brother's lap. He had missed check-in; there were messages from the hotel letting him know, which he'd also missed. He'd forgotten to switch his phone out of airplane mode.

Rowan started preparing dinner while Jason called the hotel. He announced he'd lost the reservation since he was a no-show. With the busy holiday season, they could not accommodate him with another room.

"You didn't have to pay a deposit, did you?"

The last thing she wanted was for Jason to suffer financially because she'd whined and begged to get him out here when he couldn't afford it.

"Nah. No worries. Except I might have to crash here."

"Ha ha," Ro chirped, "guess who's about to get better acquainted with my tiny couch!"

"Not funny."

"Well, you can take my bed and I'll take the couch."

"No, I am not going to put you out. I'll be fine on the couch."

"We could share," Rowan suggested, throwing a furtive glance at her brother to gauge his reaction.

"The couch?"

She chuckled, "No, the bed. Unless that would make you uncomfortable."

Jason pondered a moment. "Why would that make me uncomfortable? Would it make you uncomfortable?"

Rowan shook her head.

Why would it make her uncomfortable? The two were best friends growing up and often fell asleep in each other's beds when they were little. Of course, they hadn't done that in over a decade, but that didn't bother Rowan. Instead, it excited her to think they could revisit those days.

"Yeah, I guess that's cool." Jason shrugged. "You're sure you're okay with that? I could call around. Try to find another room."

"No. Stay. That way you don't have to worry about getting an Uber or anything."

"Thank you."

~***~

After finishing their meal and their friendly banter, the siblings decided to turn in early. Lethargic from inebriation, they crashed onto the bed with the weight of the long but festive day. Jason stretched his limbs out over the queen-sized bed, not caring or not noticing that he was impeding on Ro's space. Although he was too big for the bed, his feet hanging off the edge in his outstretched state, he seemed as comfortable as could be. He moaned into the pillow.

"Is this your side of the bed?" he asked.

"I switch sides. I move around a lot at night. Kind of a restless sleeper, I guess."

"It's fucking hot in here. Do you usually keep it so hot?"

"No, it's freezing! It's just the booze."

"No, dude. I'm sweating. Can you turn the heater off? It's not even that cold outside."

"It gets really cold at night."

"What, fifty degrees?"

"Yes! Like I said, freezing!"

Jason laughed. He sat up in the bed, stripping off his t-shirt, his dog tags clanging with the motion.

As Rowan took in the sight of Jason's bare torso for the first time since he'd seen battle, tears stung her eyes. She hadn't known what to expect. He'd told her about the injuries he'd sustained back in January when he was overseas. She'd imagined him in the Humvee, the chaos of the explosion as it hit an I.E.D., the pain he must've gone through. They were lucky not to lose anyone in the convoy. She was lucky not to lose him.

Her fingers traveled his skin, tracing across the large, pink burn scar that marred his rib cage. It stretched like spiderwebs from his waist to his underarm. Goosebumps rose across his skin.

Glancing up at him, Rowan gave a disbelieving laugh. "You're cold."

"No, you're tickling me."

"Sorry." She pulled her hand away. "Does it hurt?"

"Not anymore. It's just kind of numb."

As she studied him, she noticed Jason shift uncomfortably.

"Still think it's hot?" His eyebrows were arched, his voice flat.

Cocking her head, she said, "Jason, you're still a fox. I'm not crying because of the way it looks; I'm crying because of what you went through. You seriously downplayed it."

"I didn't want you to worry."

She grabbed his hand. "I wish I could've been with you in the hospital. You must've been in so much pain."

"Nah, they pumped me full of drugs."

She shot him a look. "You're doing it again. Don't you want to quit after all that?"

"I dunno."

"Don't you get scared?"

"Of course I get scared. Fear can make you lock up or it can drive you. I don't let it control me. I just push through the fear and do what I gotta do. Anyway, it's all I'm good at. Not everyone is blessed with the voice of an angel." Jason smiled as he teased.

"Hey, speaking of which. You know what I miss most about you, Ro?"

"Hmm?" She swallowed hard.

"The way you used to test all your songs on me." He laid down on the bed, propping his head up with his elbow. "It's been a long time since I've heard you play."

Rowan got up and fetched the acoustic guitar that she kept by the bedroom door.

"What are you in the mood for?"

"How about a lullaby?"

=-=-=

The guitar's crisp chime filled the small space. Rowan's face softened as she began singing the soft, haunting melody. Her honeyed voice crept out to surround Jason like smoke.

Rowan never looked so at peace, yet so focused as when she sang. She kept her eyes closed through almost the entire song, furrowing her eyebrows when her voice went higher. Jason watched her deft fingers pluck the strings, the rise and fall of her chest, her throat as she strained. Jason always adored watching Rowan sing. It was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen or heard. His body vibrated the entire time, every time.

Rowan's crystal blue eyes flicked open to settle on Jason.

"Fucking beautiful. I didn't think you could get any better. Is that new?"

"Yes," she said as she got up to return the guitar to its stand. She returned, snuggling under the covers and relaxing her head onto the pillow. Jason hadn't taken his eyes off her. He climbed under the sheet with her. Rowan pressed up next to Jason.

In the back of his drunken mind, Jason knew this was a bad idea. He should never have agreed to share the bed with her but he didn't know how to refuse without hurting her feelings. He'd done enough of that last Christmas. Tomorrow, he'd have to be careful with his alcohol consumption. But for tonight, he'd just have to suppress every—

"You can take those off," she yawned, moving her leg against the coarse fabric of his pants. "They feel icky."

"I'll keep 'em on."

"I don't like them. They're scratchy."

"I'll go get my sweatpants."

Despite Rowan's protests, Jason left the room to change. He considered finding an A-shirt to sleep in but figured it was too hot and his belongings were in shambles anyway. He returned to the bedroom in his sweatpants and laid back on the pillow. Rowan cuddled into him, allowing his arm to make its way under her head. Even in his boozy, sleepy state, his nerves were ablaze. She pressed her cold nose into the warm crook of his neck and her hand traveled across the bare skin of his torso to rest on the opposite side of his chest. A shiver went through his body.

"Are you cold?" Ro whispered.

"No."

"Good, because you're going to have to keep me warm."

Jason gave his sister a quick peck on the top of her head and let his eyes flutter closed, imploring the gods that be that his body would be on its best behavior.

~***~

The day before Christmas, Ro awoke with Jason to her back, his arm dangling loosely over her. She yielded to the luxury of his closeness. Reaching for his hand, she slowly entwined her fingers with his, trying not to wake him. His large hands were rough, as much as a tradesman's would be. Her brother jerked his head up. Rowan leaned back into him to turn her face to his. Blinking away the sleep, Jason groaned and buried his face into her hair.

"Ugh, I had way too much to drink last night."

"Oh, no. Don't tell me that's why you're so cuddly."

"Of course it is. You think any man in his right mind would sleep half-naked with his sister?"

Rowan was nearly stunned by the overt comment. Her heartbeat slowed a little when Jason smiled.

"Oh, fuck off! We used to do this all the time. You're my big teddy bear, remember?" Ro flipped over to tease him, pinching his cheek.

"We were little kids!"

"So? What's changed?"

Jason shrugged.

"You're still my teddy bear. Besides, I have all my clothes on. You're the only one that's half-naked here."

"Is that what you call this?" Jason lifted the top sheet to sneak a peek under the covers. Her tank top and shorts didn't cover much for someone who claimed to get so cold at night.