All Comments on 'Cindy Finds A Boy Toy'

Excellent storyline! It was well written, very sensual, very flirty without being trashy! I really liked it!

You did a terrific job of writing a story told often but not well. I felt my suspension of disbelief go into operation almost immediately. Keep up the good work, you have talent rare in the porn segment of writing.

...and very hot.

You don't know how to write clear English. Period. Many of your would-be sentences end up as fragments, with gaps where important words should go. You write "shear" when you mean "sheer." This plot is not only borrowed but trite and boring. I take it she has a cunt or something? Maybe this hot young man could taste it. Maybe you could say how it felt when he fucked her. This is pathetic stuff.

Here's a tiny example of your brilliant prose.

"She gently rubber breasts, imagining that it was Mike..."

Get an editor or a dictionary, and please don't insult us anymore until you've done a bit of work.