All Comments on 'Claire's Surprise Pt. 01'

I don't think I have ever been so upset by a read on Lit.com! So many 5star moments crashing down to 1Star in a paragraph. Your fairly original storyline with the student fucking his married teacher at the carnival was only a bit spoiled by the tiresome big black cock detail. But your thoughtless choice of narration point of view just made a comedy of it all. The notion that he could have even seen those two behind another ride let alone read their lips and see their genitals was laughable. And at one point he even heard what she was saying, in a situation where you would be hard-pressed to even hear the words spoken by someone in your own car. If you ever have occasion to redo it, simply choose a 3rd pary narrator who knows and sees all. Do keep 'em coming.

Wow a totally cliched, been there done that, copy of every other steaming pile of idiocy written lately.

I do believe many of you "writers" and yes i use the word laughably, should go to your Gay Acceptance meetings, have your coffee and doughnuts, discuss your fears of coming out. Then there will be a day when you can truly be yourself, you'll meet someone, ride off together into the sunset and never try to pass off the literary equivalent of a spiked penis cage.

It's very clear that some of the idiots that read these stories are just that idiots. They seem to not be able to differentiate between fictional characters and real life. Like that dimwit Whackdoodle who "can't wait to see this end up in divorce court." Has there ever been a dumber comment made on here? Hey retard, its all made up. It's NOT REAL. God what an imbecile. I hope the author decides that based on your lame comment to go ahead and make this story about her servicing that kid and all of his big black friends. And to top it off, give the husband the nickname Whackdoodle.

Did not bother reading more Crap for the Cucks and Trump supporters.

You know, it takes a very small man to bring politics into an erotic story site, like that idiot below. We all know people of every race and political affiliation love sex. Just let it go you moron.

I wanted to try something different by using the hubby POV. A lot of these stories are written from the wife's perspective or a 3rd party narrative and that would have been the easy route, but i thought i would try something different. Looking back on the story could have mentioned that he seen her mouth the words instead of hearing it over noise. I was thinking for part 2 of the story have it from the Mrs perspective for some of it then progressing with the story. Also wish i had a bit more dialogue between everyone instead of mostly monologue from the hubby.

Something i dont and will never understand is the hate reading of stories. i only wish there was some way for Lit to let the read know what the story is about so if you get triggered by the content you could move on to another story you may enjoy more. I wish they had something like "marks" or "summary" or like "quick notations" or maybe "tags", i will ask Lit to see if we can work on it. Life is too damn short to get offended by a purely fictional situation in an erotica story.

This stuff is fiction, i try to have a certain level of humor in everything in life as i have a lot of stress between work, friends, family (not to mention the current climate of the everything going on in the world) and write as an escape. Not sure where i will take this one, hubby could be the alpha in a situation i create or he could be sucking some other dude off.

My preference is smaller 20,000 word type stories, personally i dont enjoy 200,000 word stories on here cause i get bored quickly with them, unless done exceptionally well. I am certainly not a good enough writer to do that yet, but would like to work my way to that. I havent written a story since high school which was many moons ago. However with some ppl regardless if i write 20k or 200k if they dont like the topic or the direction of the story i will still get 1* and they will hate it.

I would like to thank the ppl for their time they took to read the story and provide feedback. I always want to improve and the only way to improve is by experience.

I enjoyed your story and look forward to part two!

Loved it! Looking forward to part 2!

Nice story! I especially like the parts where the hubby says things about the future: "her pussy was no longer just mine" or "things were never the same". The particular setting was a bit improbable (Hubby being able to see so much if they were hidden from view) but that is a quibble-the story is well written and I look forward to the next installment!

...but this was no average cuck story. Good logical build up, then good sex.

I don’t usually score a story until finished, but so far it is an easy 4-stars.

Unfortunately many stories starting well have crapped out in the end, often seeming to rush the ending. It’s like the author just wants to get it over with. Or occasionally takes off in a tangent — “How the heck did the aliens get involved in all of thus? And why the clowns? No! Not the tiny clown car!!!” Hopefully that doesn’t happen here.

Very hot story. I liked it a lot, only thing it would make it better if there was maybe more texts and more dialogue.

Personally I enjoyed this story and would like the writer to continue its development. yes, there are cliches but thousands of the stories are riddled with cliches. this was a fun read. it is titled C 01 so lets see 02 an 3.

A pretty quick build up. Very odd sister and spouse, who seem to serve no real purpose and stayed on their phones the whole time. The logistics of the tryst in the middle of a fair were improbable, but the situation was written nicely and the vignettes where he could get his glimpses were done well. Good lip reader!

Great story. Loved the "glint from my engagement ring had been muted due to the spit" and the "sight of his big black cock being fed through her pink lipstick" Really got me going.

well what started out with some promise turned to shit real fast.