All Comments on 'Closeness Ch. 01'

I have to say this is by far the best story of a big brother fucking his baby sister--my favorite within the genre--that I've ever read. It's very well-written, really flawless, and very exciting. And to top it all, the gifted author is 18 to 22 years old, maybe 20 like his hero Blake. I bet TSB was hard when he wrote it and shot a good healthy load of his own at the end. Blake's a big strong boy, totally devoted to his sister Julia, who's a virgin. When he learns she's been abused by her shitty "friends" he races to take her under his protective wing. He puts her to bed, noticing but chastely averting his eyes from the fact that she has no panties, that her sweet little slit is open to the breeze. Julia sleeps and now she feels safe, rescued by the big brother she can always rely on. "You're like Superman for fucks sake! Swooping in to save that day. That's the kind of thing that makes a girl fall in love with you!" Blake's nonplussed, Julia is beautiful and he's always loved her, more maybe than he should. The passions smoldering just beneath of surface erupt, one thing leads to another, and Blake winds up introducing his fat 8-incher up his sister's pretty little twat. With love and concern he busts Julia's cherry, which is a big brother's job anyway. It shouldn't be left to some pimply jerk who's only interested in getting his rocks off. Blake fucks his baby sister in a hot incestuous fuck that's the best he's ever had. He's proud that his big cock makes her cum like crazy, and the boy finally blows his brotherly balls up inside her. I've spent so much time on this brilliant story first because of its intrinsic merit, then because of my fascination for its highly talented author. His moniker is The Silent Brother but I'm wondering whether it shouldn't be The Happy Brother. His other two stories also concern sister-fucking. My guess is that he's got a kid sister, that he's introduced her to sibling sex, he's been humping away at her cute little cunt fucking it inside out and up and down and sideways for a while, and by now he's shot a gallon or so of his creamy semen up where both he and his sis know it belongs. If so, way to go, pal.

the beginning of the story was like a real life event , as far as I am concerned this happened to you . I love reading about how the love between a brother and sister is uncovered by a event in there lives that mite have never happened .sure there are words missing in your story but I can read between the lines ,don't worry about it . I take it there will be more pleaseeeeeeeeeeee :)

It really needs another chapter or 2 to really finish it properly. One complaint and it is very picky, but when he had her on the couch and was "pumping" two fingers in and out of her as he ate her, he didn't catch the fact that she had a hymen, and she showed no discomfort from the act? Like I said it is picky but it sort of takes some of the believability out of the situation. Please keep writing, I think you are talented and will only get better.

Great buildup, and nicely excecuted story. Love the line" If we weren't related, I would totally be banging you." Man, I always wanted to say that to my sister, or hear her say it to me. Always had a fantasy about making love to my own sister. Never happened though. Hoping yours was a real life experience. Hope to see more about Blake and Julia. Again, great job on this story.

story needs to be a little longer

If you are as young as another commentator has stated, then you have a wonderfully mature writing style. I couldn't be happier to give this story five stars.

What is also evident is the care that you took in creating wholly believable siblings whose love story is equally realistic.

I would suspect that the next chapter may deal with Blake seeking retribution against the guys who drugged Julia and attempted to rape her. I hope you deal delicately with such actions, since the sibling love story must be priority #1.

His sister is drugged and nearly raped and he doesn't go and hunt down the scum.

Next Chapter, please.

The first problem with this is that as a writer, you have failed to take into consideration the motivation of your characters. Why is Jules totally okay with having sex with Blake so soon after the attempted rape by Kyle and Alex? She has just recently suffered an experience so traumatic to her that she was nearly comatose when Blake found her. Yet less than 24 hours later, she is very willing to give her precious virginity to her brother. Granted, she obviously has had a crush on her brother from the conversation, but that alone isn't cause enough for the complete 180 degree turn around in her sexual awareness. Extremely implausible without the author giving up a better effort creating a believable background scenario for the story.

This is one of the reasons why I slam the one-page wonder stories so often. You're serving your guests bones with hardly any meat on them. Granted, your actual sex scene was pretty good and your typographical errors were kept to a bare minimum. But you needed to devote more effort to the story as a whole.

I also wanted to address the following sentence as well:

"She gagged, but kept her head there, every bit of my seed going straight down into her stomach."

The majority of people in your audience are NOT going to find the fact that your heroine is choking and gagging while giving her lover some head as stimulating or sexy. This is a fallacy created by some sicko-assholes in the porn industry and has carried over into this website. There's a major difference between something being erotic and something that does nothing but service the prurient interests of someone who wants nothing more than to beat off to someone else's fantasy.

Overall, I considered this one a mediocre effort at best. 2/5

One additional thing really quick...

Throwing out there that the title of this led me to believe that there would be more additional chapters forthcoming, and yet here we are NINE YEARS LATER and nada.