Consequences - Eve

"Stay the night with me. Let me help you to forget, if just for this one night."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. I can give you this, but only this one time."

He followed me to my room. I slipped off my nightgown, slid in under the covers and watched as he undressed and slid in on the other side. I held out my arms and he moved against me, both of us laying on our sides. He was already hard so I helped guide him inside me again. This time it was more controlled and he took much more care not to hurt me or cause me discomfort. After several minutes of this, I moved over him and this time I mounted him. I let my body tell me what to do and I began to rise up, almost releasing him and then dropping back down, forcing his cock in as far as it would go. I maintained this motion for several minutes, watching his face relax. I bent over to allow my ample breasts to come within reach of his mouth and felt a surge of pleasure when he took my nipple between his teeth. I moved faster at that and I could feel a climax approaching. It would be my first as I had not cum before.

Bobby realized what I was feeling and he began to move up to meet my downward trusts. We were now fucking! Before, it was love and compassion; this was not. This was lust and I suddenly realized that it was wrong for me to feel this way. I began to slow down but Bobby had my hips in both hands and was pulling me tightly to him as his hips drove upwards into me. I felt the panic begin to build and was about to say something and stop but it was too late. My climax was on me and I came! Bobby felt the contraction and he came inside me as well.

I collapsed on top of him and tried to control my breathing and my heart. I felt the calm come slowly and finally moved off and rolled onto my back. I was spent but my mind was in turmoil. I realized what I had done just as I climaxed. I had not done this out of compassion! I had fucked my brother in law in lust! I felt the shame wash over me and I wanted to cry, but I couldn't let Bobby see that. I got up and went into the bathroom to wash my crime away. I cried as I looked at myself in the mirror. I had betrayed my husband twice, first in pity but then in lust. The sickness overcame me and I went to my knees over the toilet. My stomach contracted and I was violently ill. I remained there for what seemed hours but finally rose and washed my face. I avoided my reflection in the mirror.

When I came out of the bathroom, Bobby had left the room. I went out into the hall looking for him but heard the front door slam shut. He was gone. In a way, I was glad since I wasn't looking forward to talking to him tonight. Maybe after it had become less painful. I went back to bed but didn't sleep at all the rest of that night.

The next few days were difficult for me. John wasn't aware of anything wrong since I made no mention of what had happened, and Bobby hadn't been around since he left that night. John and I made love when he came home the next day and I admit, I was more forceful than usual, trying to erase what had happened with Bobby from my mind. I could enjoy lust with my husband and I did. Several times. John loved it and wondered but I simply told him I was having so much fun trying to have a baby. My love for John finally gave me the peace to forget Bobby.

Bobby came by the end of that week and he and I just smiled at each other, behaving as we usually did toward the other and it seemed fine. In a quiet moment, I told Bobby that we needed to forget anything happened and he assured me that it was exactly the way he felt. We parted in agreement and things went back to normal. Bobby did seem to be in better spirits and he began to take an interest in work again. John and Sal both commented on it and both felt he was finally over the hump. I hoped that I had been able to make that much of a difference but if I did, it would be my secret.

John and I continued to work on making our family but nothing seemed to happen. I was late on my period but that was not unusual. I had been as much as three months late before without being pregnant, so I thought nothing about it yet. John was getting more and more depressed and decided to go see the doctor. I just laughed and told him to just wait it out since we were still having fun trying. It had not yet become a chore. He finally agreed and things went on.

It was two months later that I finally knew for sure that I was pregnant. John and I had been trying now for over a year and it finally happened. I looked at the plastic stick in my hand again just to be sure but it had two pink lines. Pregnant! I almost wept for joy for it had been so long in coming. I put the stick in a small plastic bag and stuck it in the trash. I didn't want John to see it until I could put together a little surprise for when I told him. I was Pregnant!!! I was almost too happy to contain myself. But, I wanted it to be perfect when I told John.

I spent the afternoon shopping for a new nightgown and some items for dinner that I knew would make John very happy. I put together a magnificent meal of lobster with drawn butter, steak medium rare, baked potato with sour cream and chives, a vegetable dish of cauliflower, peas and carrots and a chocolate cake with ice cream for dessert. I wanted it to be perfect so I made each dish carefully, using the recipes that Charity had given me. I called John to confirm that he would be home by 6:30 and planned my dinner for then. Everything was ready.

I went upstairs just before John was due to arrive and put on my new nightgown. It was so shear that it was as if I was wearing nothing. I slipped on the matching robe of silk that only served to make everything underneath look more mysterious. Neither the nightgown nor the robe was designed to hide, only to entice. That was what I was going for. John would be tempted early but I would make him eat first, then I would give him the news and finally he would take me to bed where I would show him my love and devotion to him and our new family.

The evening went as I planned. John was home on time, he came in and was caught by surprise by the way I was dressed, but I wouldn't tell him anything. I had set the places before and the table looked beautiful. I served the dishes and watched in pleasure as John's face lit up. We actually spent a pleasant hour at dinner and I even enjoyed the meal. For a few minutes, I forgot my news and enjoyed the conversation and the food with my husband. It was perfect. More than perfect, it was extraordinary.

I waited until we had finished and told John to go into the family room and I would bring coffee in. I put coffee on as I put away the remaining lobster and meat. I would let everything else go till morning.

I fixed the coffee, put everything on a tray and carried it into the family room. I set it on the coffee table and sat beside John on the couch while I fixed our coffees. Once he was settled back, I sighed and relaxed. Now was the time.

"You probably wondered why I fixed you this special meal and why I am dressed this way. I have something to tell you and I wanted it to be perfect."

John was looking at me now and I saw a small look of worry cloud his face. I decided to make this quick so as not to worry him.

"It's nothing bad, John. It is the best news in the world. You know how hard we have been trying to have a baby? Well, guess what! You're going to be a father!"

I watched him, waiting for the light to come into his eyes and turn the face I loved into a picture of joy and love. But instead, I saw a frown begin and then a look of anger come over him turning the face I loved into a mask of contempt. I was lost. What had happened? He wanted children as much as I did so why was he angry? I moved back away from him at the hate I saw in his face and began to cry. What was wrong?

"John, what's the matter? Why are you looking at me that way? This is our baby! This is what we have been striving for. This is what we wanted. Please, talk to me. What's wrong?"

John seemed to struggle with himself, trying to make the words come out but all he did was stutter and spit, his face was so contorted. He fought a battle with his anger and finally got himself under control enough to answer me.

"I had some news myself for tonight. But it wasn't as bad as the news you just gave me. I saw Doctor Jeffers today and he gave me the results of some tests I had run last week. Guess what, my loving wife: I'm sterile! That's right, sterile, as in not able to have children. It happened when I was a kid."

The shock from his words was as if someone had slapped me. I felt the blood leave my face and my breathing become shallow and rapid and I felt dizzy. I tried to stand but my legs wouldn't hold me. I was having trouble focusing on anything and I wanted only to run away, as far and as fast as I could. I was so confused and so frightened. I couldn't accept what I had just heard. I stood up, only to stumble and fall to the floor. I stuck my hand out to catch myself and the pain in my wrist jolted me back to reality.

"What did you say? What do you mean, sterile. I'm pregnant! How could I be pregnant if you're sterile? That's impossi . . . "

And then it hit me! The baby wasn't John's, it was Bobby's! Oh, God! What had I done? What did I do to my husband and my world? I turned away from John and I ran to the bedroom. I shut the door and I locked it from the inside. I couldn't face him now. What had I done? God forgive me, what had I done?

I stayed in my room for the rest of the evening and through the night. I didn't know what John had done or even if he was still home. Home! It was not likely that this would by my home for much longer. John was a wonderful man and very understanding but he would never tolerate infidelity. We had talked about that many times as we saw friends of ours break up and separate due to cheating. His family was very important to him and he would never do anything to jeopardize it. But I had. And irony of ironies, it was family that I was trying to help that caused me to fall. My love for Bobby as a sister and my compassion for his pain was my sin.

I went down to the kitchen the next morning, dreading what I might find, but John was gone and there were no notes or anything to tell me where he had gone. I didn't even know whether he had stayed last night or left. I had no choice but to wait. I called work and told them that I was not able to come in today and might have to call off the rest of the week. I prepared myself for what was to come. I wondered what I could do and decided to see if I could reach Bobby. I had to let him know that John knew I had been unfaithful and it would soon become clear that Bobby was the most likely candidate. At least I thought that's how John would think.

I decided to call his cell phone first just to be safe. I dialed the number and waited.

"Hello? Eve?"

"Yes, Bobby, it's me. I have something to tell you. I'm pregnant and the baby is yours. I don't know whether John has figured it out yet but you have to be very careful. Do you hear me?"

"Why would I have to be careful? Isn't the baby his? My God Eve, we only had one time together. How could it be my baby?"

"John is sterile. He has been all his life. He just didn't know it till last night. He told me last night when I told him I was pregnant. He's gone and I don't know where he is. He never said a word to me after he told me. I'm scared now and I don't know what to do. Just be careful."

I hung up without giving him time to ask more questions or to tell me not to worry. I knew John, and I was worried. Bobby would have to be careful but maybe John wouldn't figure it out. My life was now in a mess and I had no idea of where it would end up but I didn't want Bobby to have to be part of it. If he could stay clear, so much the better. I gathered my courage and waited. I didn't have long to wait.

The phone rang and I rushed to answer. I prayed that it was John but in the same instant, I prayed it wasn't.

"Hello? John? Is that you?"

"It's me. Are you alone?"

"Of course I'm alone. Where are you? Are you coming home? We have to talk. You have to come home so we can talk. John?"

"I'll be there in half an hour."

"Where are . . . "

He had already hung up and I was talking to a dial tone. I put the receiver down and wondered how I was going to handle this. The truth? God, how did I get myself into this mess. If I tell the truth, I cause trouble between John and his brother. If I lie, I stand to lose my marriage without any doubt. If I tell the truth, I have a chance that John will understand the compassion for a family member who was in pain. If I lie, there is no chance that he would ever forgive me. To lie or not to lie. It seems that the only chance for me was with the truth.

True to his word, John was there in less than half an hour. He came in the front door as he always did and didn't say a word as he went into the kitchen for a beer. He popped the top and walked back to the family room where I was waiting. He sat down across from me in his recliner and just watched me as he took a sip of his beer. I couldn't tell from his face what he was thinking so I waited, not sure of how to begin. I decided to let him set the pace and speak first.

"Well, how have you been? Seeing anyone? But of course you're seeing someone. You're pregnant, for God's sake so you have to be seeing someone. How can I be so stupid?"

I tried to stifle a small sob but I was unsuccessful. It came out as a hiccup as I tried to swallow the sound. Well, that was how it was going to be. Brutal! Well, if I was going to lose it all, I wasn't going down without a fight. John knew me and he knew I wouldn't let him treat me like a tramp. I knew that what I did was wrong, but I wasn't a tramp or a slut.

"I'm not seeing anyone and I never have. It was a one time thing and it happened, but I wasn't seeing anyone. It just happened. I can tell you about it if you want to listen, but if you'd rather take cheap shots at me, I'll wait till you're done."

"Ah, a good defense is a good offense huh? Well, why don't you tell me all about it and we can both have a big laugh. Tell me about your boyfriend. Let's hear it."

OK, now it was time. How to do this? All I could think of was to tell the truth and let it fall.

"When you went to Fort Wayne a couple of months ago and had to stay over, you know Bobby came over and stayed the night."

I stopped when he jumped up and grabbed me by the throat. He had his hand on me and I could feel it tighten, but he stopped himself with an oath. It cost him, but he stopped. He had never laid a hand on me in anger but he almost did that time. Rather than pull back, I raised my head, exposing my neck to his anger and waited. He released me and backed down. He moved to the couch and sat again.

"Go ahead. Tell me all of it."

Well, I did. I told him of hearing Bobby crying and going to him and holding him. I told him how it went and how I tried to comfort him. I let him know that the sex was nothing more than a comforting. I tied to get him to see how I felt at that time and how we just came together giving comfort and trying to stop the pain. I told him to remember how much better Bobby was in the next few weeks and that it was worth it just to help him past that terrible time in his life. He was suffering incredible pain and no one was able to help him. That was all it was. That one time and never again. I was conscious that I didn't tell him of the second time that same night but I thought that it was bad enough to know that I had sex with his brother once. I would bear the shame of that alone.

I finished and just waited. It was in his hands now. I had been almost completely truthful and I had to wait to see if I had a future with my husband. But as I waited, he said nothing. He was looking at the floor and not at me. His mouth was working as if he were saying words but I couldn't make them out. I was becoming nervous as he continued in this way. I finally could stand it no longer and gave vent to my frustrations.

"Well, don't you have anything to say? Aren't you going to yell at me and call me names? I deserve it. Anything at all, I deserve it. Just say something."

He finally looked at me and I saw nothing in his face. That's right: nothing at all. Just a cold, dead stare that was worse than any words. But, he did speak.

"When you gave Bobby this comfort of yours, what did he do? Did he say 'no, I can't do this,' or 'this is wrong' or anything to try to stop you?

"Well, no. He was the one that initiated it but I let it continue. So, no, he didn't try to stop me."

"That's what I thought."

This was directed at me but then he began to talk almost to himself. I could hear but he wasn't talking to me.

"So, he was the one that started it. I should have known. I should have suspected. But no, I thought. He's my brother so I don't have to worry. He wouldn't do it again."

At that, John stood up from the couch and turned without another word and walked out the front door, slamming it behind him. I was so surprised that I didn't even try to stop him. By the time I reacted, he was gone and I heard his car pull away.

I waited for something to happen all that day but nothing. I tried to call John on his cell but got his voice mail. Same with Bobby. I finally gave up and waited. Still nothing. As I fixed a small lunch for myself, I wondered if I should call Sal or Charity. I had no idea if John had told them or where he had been staying since he left last night. I decided to wait and let John decide what to do next.

By evening, I still had no word. John had apparently decided to punish me with his silence and his absence. Bobby wouldn't contact me now so I could expect no word from him. Since I was not the silent suffering type, I decided to call Charity and see if she would meet me.

I got her at home and spoke with her for a minute to see if she knew anything. It was quickly apparent she knew nothing. I decided right then and there to tell her and see what she would suggest. I asked her if she could meet with me outside the house, maybe at the Denny's on the corner near her home. She agreed, somewhat suspiciously, but she would meet me. I left immediately and arrived just as she did. We found a booth.

"So, tell me what the secret is all about. I know you have something to tell me and I hope it's good news."

"Well, Charity, I'm pregnant. I'm going to have a baby and I'm almost three months along."

Her face split into a grin and she leaned across the table to grab my shoulders and give me a big kiss. Charity had suffered much from the loss of Celina and her little granddaughter, almost as much as Bobby. She and Sal wanted grandchildren just as much as we wanted to give them to her.

"Charity, please, let me tell you something before you go any further. I need your help. Will you hear me out before you say anything?"

"Of course, but you should be happy. This is great news!"

"Charity, the baby is not John's. It's Bobby's."

She just stared at me as if I had gone crazy. She struggled with this information and it was almost as though she couldn't grasp it. Her face got red and she was breathing very fast. I could see her chest heaving and I saw her clench her fists until the knuckles were white. It was a battle, but she finally got herself under control. She looked at me with contempt on her face.

"How can this be? You and Bobby? Bobby who just lost his wife and baby? How could you do this thing? Tell me! How could you stab my son in the back by sleeping with his brother?"

"It isn't like that. I asked you to let me tell you the truth before you blame me for everything. Are you not going to listen to me?"

She glared at me some more but finally stopped, looked at her clenched fists and relaxed. She looked up with more control and told me to continue. I let out the breath I had been holding and continued.