Cracks in Their Shells

While at the jewelry store, Logan also shopped for another special gift. The myriad of engagement rings was overwhelming to him. Round cut, square cut, teardrop-shaped, marquis cut, and heart-shaped diamonds competed for his approval. When he had purchased Laura's ring many years ago, his choices were limited due to his modest budget. While he didn't intend to bankrupt himself on a ring for Becca, he did want to get her something worthy of adorning her delicate fingers. A lady in the store patiently modeled several rings for him until he narrowed his choices to a round half-carat stone and a marquis cut stone that was slightly larger. As he studied the rings, a voice behind him asked, "May I offer a suggestion?"

Logan turned to find an elderly lady looking over his shoulder, then at him. It was Granny. He practically fell over when he saw the matriarch of the McQueen family discovering his intentions towards her granddaughter. He had been busted.

She must have read his mind because she quickly assured him, "My lips are sealed, Logan. Oh, I'm a blabbermouth alright, but I wouldn't dare ruin this for you and Becca."

Relief washed over his face. "Thank you, Granny," he managed to choke out the words. "I'd be glad to hear your suggestion."

"Well, they're both beautiful rings and I know she will be thrilled with either of them, but the marquis cut isn't practical. Those corners will hang on her sweaters, towels, and, well, anything cloth."

"I hadn't thought of that," Logan admitted. "I haven't found myself in this section of a jewelry store in quite some time," he said with a smile.

"Well, that's good to know," joked Granny. Upon her advice, he chose the round diamond.

"Now that you're a good bit lighter in the wallet, let me take you to lunch." It wasn't a question, and Logan gratefully accepted.

"When do you plan to ask her?" Granny inquired.

"Um, I'm not sure yet," Logan admitted. "I'm not good at planning romantic gestures. Maybe something will come up naturally and I'll know it's the time."

"Well, Becca will love it any way it happens. Just don't make me, I mean her, wait too long."

"I don't intend to wait too long, Granny, but like I said, hopefully the time will be right soon."

Granny smiled widely, then a far away look came over her face. She looked back at Logan and said, "Take care of her, Logan. She's a special lady, but I'm sure you already know that."

"Yes, she is, and I will."

"Good!" Granny said. "Now, how about some dessert?"

*********

After his lunch with Granny, Logan had one more stop to make before he returned home. It was a stop he didn't particularly want to make, but he knew it had to be done. He had to talk to Laura.

He drove to the peaceful lake outside of town and parked the truck. A young couple with a toddler was feeding the ducks, while another family was enjoying a picnic on an uncharacteristically warm December day. Logan walked down the shoreline a ways to be able to talk to Laura undisturbed.

"Hi, sweetie," he began, then struggled to continue. "I miss you." A slight breeze rippled the surface of the lake. He took this as a sign to continue. "Laura, I love you. I'll never stop loving you. You are the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I can't begin to imagine what my life would have been without you and the boys in it. They're doing great, sweetie. Both of them are working hard, will graduate next year, and have nice girlfriends..." His voice trailed off at the mention of their girlfriends, but he gathered himself and continued:

"And I do, too, Laura." He breathed a sigh of relief that he had finally gotten the words out of his mouth. The gentle breeze continued to caress his face. "Her name is Becca. She's special like you and she makes me very happy. I reread your letter to me where you encouraged me to find someone who would take care of me, and she's the one, babe. I hope you still feel the same way." Tears had begun streaming down his face.

The breeze picked up and blew a few stray leaves into the lake. Logan stifled a sob and looked down. Two of the leaves drifted towards him, touched, and settled against the shore. Their stems interlocked and stayed that way. Logan looked at the other leaves on the lake. They floated their separate ways, but the two at his feet remained intertwined. Logan took it as a sign of his late wife's approval. "Thank you," he whispered, almost inaudibly. "I love you, Laura."

*********

The first test of Logan and Becca's relationship came three days before Christmas.

Martin and Mitchell had come home from Raleigh the previous weekend. Logan introduced them to Becca and the boys hit it off with her instantly. They noticed the change that had come over their father and silently rejoiced. Like Janice, they had hoped that he would find someone new after the grieving process over Laura had passed.

"What do you mean, Oma doesn't know?" Mitchell exclaimed. "She's gonna have a stroke!"

"For real," Martin agreed.

"Look, guys, you know how Mom is. I didn't want to give her something else to hound me over until I knew how things were going to work out with Becca. Had we not been a match, she would have given me holy hell for trying to date a woman who was obviously not up to her standards."

"Okay, but I don't want to be a witness when you break the news to Oma," said Mitchell. "What about Opa? Does he know?"

Logan looked as sheepish as the cat who ate the canary. "Yeah, he knows. He promised not to tell."

"Dude, you are screwed!" Martin interjected. "Not only does Oma not know, she's going to flip out when she finds out that Opa did!"

"You two just let me worry about Mom. I'll handle it." The boys gladly agreed to this.

Marilyn Mathews was a world champion worrier. She worried about Hal, Logan's father, because of his high cholesterol and blood pressure. She worried about Janice going out on her own when she left the accounting firm she was a part of as a junior partner. Never mind that Janice had made this move eight years ago and was in no danger of not having enough clients to stay in business. She worried about Mitchell and Martin going away to school, and about Jake and Sophie just because. Most of all, she worried about Logan. She worried about him being alone, about his cabinet shop business staying afloat, about whether or not he was eating right since he didn't have Laura around to see to it that he did, and about his happiness and state of mind in general. Her saving grace was that she and Hal had retired to Florida and therefore only had the chance to worry about her family in person a couple of times each year.

Logan had been vague about his parents when Becca asked about them. He told her about the retirement community they lived in, that his dad played golf at least three times each week, that his mother played bridge with her friends and was active in church and the community, and that they were a typical Florida retirement couple. He admitted that his mother worried a lot but downplayed that issue. Becca was unaware that Marilyn didn't know about her and Logan. She was excited to meet them.

On the day the elder Mathews couple was to arrive, Becca took the afternoon off from work and bought groceries to prepare supper for them. She figured that would be a good way to make a good first impression on Logan's family. The boys helped her unload the groceries and observed that they would not go to bed hungry that night. They had just finished with Becca's load when a gold Buick with Florida plates turned into the driveway.

Martin looked at Mitchell nervously. "Do you think he told her yet?"

"I don't know," replied his brother, "but we're about to find out."

The boys exchanged hugs with their grandparents and helped with their suitcases. They looked in the backseat and saw that it was loaded with groceries. Looking across the top of the car at one another, they almost simultaneously mouthed "oh, shit" to one another. If Marilyn was preparing to cook supper for them that evening, then she didn't know about Becca yet. "We've got company!" Mitchell's voice rang out as a warning.

Becca came out of the kitchen to greet Logan's parents. Logan was nowhere to be seen. Marilyn looked Becca up and down, wondering which of her grandsons was seeing an older woman. She frowned as Becca extended her hand and said cheerily, "Hi, Mrs. Mathews. I'm Rebecca McQueen..."

"Who the hell are you, and which one of my grandsons..." Marilyn interrupted Becca's greeting.

"Logan's girlfriend," Becca finished her sentence with a shocked expression.

"Oh, shit. I'll go find Dad," Mitchell said. Martin flung open the door and led the way to the workshop.

"Watch your mouth, young man!" Marilyn yelled as the boys disappeared out the back door, seemingly unaware of her own swearing. Turning again to face Becca, she said loudly, "Excuse me? You're Logan's what?"

"Girlfriend," Becca said quietly, still in shock from the rude greeting she had received.

"Well, hello there! You must be Becca!" Hal's voice rang much louder than necessary. "I'm Logan's father, Hal." He walked to the shaken Becca and gave her a hug, which she did not return.

"Wait - you knew? And didn't tell me?" Marilyn's voice rose in pitch and volume. "You son of a monkey fucking rat bastard..." Hal doubled over in laughter.

The boys, meanwhile, had breathlessly burst into the shop to find Logan. He looked up in surprise at their entrance and asked what was wrong. Mitchell uttered the single word "Oma."

"Oh, shit!" Logan exclaimed as he exited the shop with the same ferocity the boys had entered it. Upon reaching the back steps, Logan grabbed the door and promptly tripped over Roscoe, who was trying to make his escape from the growing din in the kitchen. He fell into the doorframe and banged his head with an audible "thud." Seeing stars, he continued his scramble into the kitchen where two women, one pissed and the other greatly confused, as well as one maniacally laughing man awaited his arrival.

"Mom, Dad, this is Becca. Becca, this is..."

"We've met," Becca interrupted him icily. She excused herself from the kitchen.

"You two assholes!" Marilyn screamed as Logan leaned against the counter to steady himself. Hal grabbed his sides and gasped for air.

"I don't know what you think is so fucking funny, you cocksucker! In the bedroom! Now!" she ordered Hal. Turning to Logan, she growled," I'll deal with you later, you little shit. You had better go check on your 'girlfriend.'" The bedroom door slammed behind her.

Daring to touch the growing lump on his forehead, Logan winced in pain. He sighed and made his way down the hallway to the bathroom. Gently tapping on the door, he said, "Sweetie, can we..."

The door flew open, and Logan saw an enraged Becca for the briefest of moments before he was met with a vicious slap to his left cheek. The door slammed shut and Logan heard Becca turn the lock.

"Guess not," he sighed. Making his way back to the kitchen, he sat down at the table and placed his head in his hands. "Ow! Shit!" he cried at the pain when he touched his forehead. As he sat there, he felt a silent rage growing. As quickly as it built, it subsided as he admitted out loud, "It's all my fault."

Hal joined him a couple of minutes later. Looking at his son's red cheek he said, "I guess that answers my question about how things went with Becca. Let me see your head." He took a dish towel and went to the freezer for some ice.

"How'd it go with Mom?" Logan groaned.

"You know, I'm kinda glad to know she's still got it in her. She didn't use any words I haven't heard before, but she did string them together in some new and creative ways. What is a shitbitcher, anyway?"

"Probably a lot like a helldammer, but worse." Logan's sense of humor started to recover. Hal placed the cloth on Logan's head. "Ow, that hurts like a shitbitcher." Hal chuckled.

"Dad, all of this is on me, and I know it. What are we going to do?"

"We're going to sit down at this table and work things out like calm, reasonable adults, Logan." Marilyn had joined them, and it was her voice that answered him. "I would tell you to go and get Becca, but judging from the look on your cheek it may be better for one of the boys to go do it." Martin and Mitchell had appeared from the living room.

"I'll go get her," Mitchell volunteered. "Maybe she won't hit me." He returned shortly and announced, "She said to give her a couple of minutes."

Becca warily made her way to the kitchen, where she found Logan, Hal, and Marilyn sitting at the table. She had been crying, but the tears had now been replaced by a thousand-yard stare. She stood in the doorway, unsure if she should sit or run away.

Marilyn spoke first. "Becca, please have a seat with us. We all need to have a talk."

"I'm not sure there's much more that needs to be said," Becca replied coldly. Although her face had calmed, her voice gave away the fact that she was still plenty pissed. She remained standing.

"Understood," Marilyn replied. "But if you will at least have a listen, I would appreciate it. Please?" Becca came into the room and sat down next to Logan. She refused to look at him.

"Becca, I am very sorry, and very embarrassed for the way I spoke to you. My swearing is inexcusable. This all caught me off guard, and I'm still rattled from getting through traffic in Atlanta, but that's no excuse for the way I behaved. Please accept my apology, Becca. Will you forgive me?"

Becca did not make eye contact with Marilyn, instead choosing to study the woodgrain of the kitchen table. She nodded her forgiveness. Marilyn continued:

"Hal, I'm sorry for the way I spoke to you as well. Will you forgive me?" He responded with a simple, "Of course, dear." She turned to Logan.

"Logan, I'm still a bit hurt that you didn't tell me about you and Becca, but I understand, or at least think I understand, why you didn't. I'm not mad at you - or at anybody at this table - but I do think we need to have a talk between just the two of us sometime soon. All that said, please forgive me and accept my apology for my behavior."

"You know I will, Mama." He rose from his seat and gave Marilyn a long hug.

"My turn," offered Hal. "Marilyn, I've never kept secrets from you, unless you count gifts and surprises. I know you understand those things, but I shouldn't expect you to understand why I kept something so important a secret. Had I known anything like what happened a little while ago would happen, I would have broken my word to Logan and told you. I'm sorry. No more secrets?"

"No more secrets," she replied as she kissed him on the cheek.

Logan was next to take up the confessional. "Dad, I put you in an awkward situation by asking you to keep a secret from Mom. I'm sorry for that." Hal simply nodded his agreement and forgiveness.

"Mom, I'm sorry I didn't trust you and respect you the way I should have. I know that you have always worried about me, Janice, and, well, everybody for different reasons. I didn't want you to worry about me dating again after all this time. I took the coward's way out and caused what could have been a happy moment for all of us to turn into a nightmare. Please accept my apology, Mama." Once again, mother and son connected for a hug of forgiveness.

Logan took a deep breath and turned to Becca. Softly, gently, and with raw, naked honesty he began.

"Becca, I owe you the biggest apology of all. You are the most purely good person I know. You have trusted me with the most painful parts of your past, listened to me while I poured out my heart to you, held me close, laughed with me, cried with me. Most of all, you made me feel alive again, Becca. I'm scared to death sitting here thinking that I may have just thrown all that away. Because I was a coward. A gutless, yellow, chicken shit of a coward."

It was more than Becca could take. She ran from the table and into the living room, crumbled on the sofa, and pulled a pillow to her face. Logan got up to follow her and found her with her back to him. Her shoulders shook as she sobbed into the pillow. Tears were streaming from his eyes now. It was over.

Gently placing his hand on her back, he softly began, "Becca, please..."

At his touch, Becca whirled around and threw the pillow at him. Fearing another slap (or worse) was coming, he stumbled back and again tripped over Roscoe. The hound had decided it was safe to come out of his hiding place when the yelling had subsided. This time Logan busted his ass right in the middle of the living room. Becca jumped on top of him as a horrified Hal and a wickedly smiling Marilyn watched from the doorway. Grabbing both sides of his shirt collar and roughly pulling him to a sitting position, she straddled his lap and drew back a fist. Logan closed his eyes and gritted his teeth, waiting for the coming blow. An eternity that was no more than two seconds passed, then Logan opened his eyes to see why she hadn't hit him yet. She dropped her fist, reached up with her thumb and forefinger and honked his nose a couple of times, then got in his face and squealed, "GOTCHA, ASSHOLE!" She collapsed on the floor and shook with laughter.

"What just happened in there?" Hal asked Marilyn.

She slapped her husband on the ass and let out her pent-up laughter. "He got what he had coming. You'll get yours later, asshole. We girls will teach you two to keep secrets from us, won't we Becca?"

"Damn skippy," Becca concurred.

Logan sat in stunned silence. He looked at Hal, who obviously wasn't in on the joke. He looked at Marilyn, who had caught Becca's laughing fit. He looked at the hallway door just in time to see Martin and Mitchell grinning at each other, then retreating to their bedroom. Roscoe trailed after them, tired of being stepped on by Logan. Finally, Logan looked at Becca, who was struggling to compose herself.

"In all your cowardly scheming, you forgot one piece of the puzzle to keep quiet, dummy: Janice."

Logan rolled to his knees and crawled to the couch. Once he managed to pull himself up, Becca plopped down in his lap and called to Marilyn, "Would you mind bringing me some ice? Logan seems to have gotten a boo-boo." Her laughter was now interspersed with snorts, which only made her laugh harder. She finally pulled herself together enough to continue talking.

"Since all you would give me was this lame 'Florida retiree' story about your folks, I asked Janice what was up. She got me on the phone with Marilyn. We've been planning this charade for over a week now."

Logan looked again at Hal, who simply shrugged his shoulders and said, "I'm going to fix some coffee." He retreated to the kitchen, leaving Logan alone with the two scheming women.

"I know why you did it, dear," Marilyn said to Logan. "I do worry about you, and I always will. You're still my little boy, no matter how old you get."

"I know why you did it, as well," Becca said, as she held the ice to his forehead. "No matter how convoluted your reasoning was, you were trying to protect me. I appreciate that, but promise me something, Logan. No more secrets. We've been through too much together for that. If I can't trust you, then..." her voice trailed off.

"Understood," Logan said. "No more secrets. I love you, Becca."

"I love you, too, Logan."

"Well, now that it appears the two of you have adequately come to an understanding, how 'bout we start on supper, Becca?"

"Sounds good Marilyn. I'll be right there."

Becca looked at Logan again before she left for the kitchen. She bent down and kissed the bump on his head. "That's going to make a pretty bruise," she giggled.

"Becca, if you and Mom knew about this and planned it out, did you really have to hit me that hard?"

"Well, I'm out of practice when it comes to slapping guys. I guess I don't know my own strength. You deserved it, though."