Cuckolds Anonymous

"Now you may be wondering what I did with all the stuff I took out of the cabinets, shelves and off the walls. Well, I want none of that stuff as it would remind me of the the bitch so we spread it across the floor of the master bedroom. I mean every dish and glass, every little figurine was placed carefully from the front of the closet to the door. You could not walk from the door to the closet without clearing a path first. Well, I take that back as the door was not there anymore either. Nor were there any doors hanging except the exterior doors which I left in place for security."

"I explained before I am an accountant. Well, I kept a receipt for everything we bought to put into that house. My wife and I paid for it out of our communal assets so I was going to give her back half of those appliances and fixtures. Just without the work or what I called sweat equity I had in the house. My wife had done virtually nothing to help except pick out the appliances and help plan the renovations. I'll want a few of the mobile appliances like coffee pot and microwave and that sort of thing. It'll give my ex something else to argue about." I got some appreciative laughter.

"By the time her plane set down at the airport, everything in the house that I had assembled or installed had been taken apart. I got a call from the process server who handed her the divorce papers and sat back to wait for her to come home."

"June, the secretary had driven them to the airport in her van so she dropped them off. My brother and I were waiting with a couple of the neighbors who wanted to see the rest of the show. They'd been watching me take apart the house all week and could testify where I had been and what I was doing. While waiting for the cheaters to get home, we had been consuming the contents of my liquor cabinet and eating the steaks from my freezer I'd kept back. All the rest of the food was taken to Ava's mother's house earlier in the week. I told her my freezer had gone out but that did not explain all the canned goods and condiments I dropped off. The poor woman was too confused to ask what was going on. I knew she'd find out before long."

"June stuck around only long enough to let Ava and Doug out of the van. I wondered why Doug even came home with her. I walked around front, leaving the others to watch from the side of the house as Ava clambered out of the van followed by Doug, her lover. Both were fit to be tied. Well, she was yelling, waving the envelope she had been given. He was angry demanding to know what kind of lies I might have told his wife and saying he was going to bury me legally for 'casting aspersions on his character'. I had filed for divorce on the basis of adultery and named him as one of the parties. As you all know the courts do not really care about the reason for a divorce, but my claiming adultery put a new light on the problem. Or rather added a bit of embarrassment because it would be part of the public record. About that same time Doug's wife arrived with her sister. I knew Ava's time of arrival as I had been tracking her cell phone so I'd given Janice a call they were on their way."

"Janice had already phoned me to tell me part of what she found when she returned home after her weekend away from home. She asked if I had been to her home that weekend. I told her truthfully, I had been working hard at my own house and barely went anywhere else except to my brother's to sleep at night. Apparently she could not park in her garage when she got home. He whole driveway was filled with car parts."

"Not just any car parts, but the pieces that had been her husband's beloved '65 Ford Mustang. It was his pride and joy and he would show it off to every visitor to his house. The car had originally been his father's and was Doug's first car. It held great sentimental value. His father had put it into storage. Years later Doug had the car totally restored. I'd heard people laugh and comment he loved that mustang more than his wife and kids. That might have been an exaggeration, but not by much. Of course Doug was a little upset to see his wife drive up and he immediately began with a lame comment that whatever she might have heard was a total lie. She did not tell him what was awaiting him at home. All of us stood outside while my wife took her suitcase inside. Then came the scream from inside the house.

Ava came to the door screaming, 'what the fuck did you do to my house?' I knew she did not have time to really check it out. All she saw was the stuff piled in the living room. I'm surprised she did not notice the blinds and drapes were missing before she even got inside. I guess she was a little off her game from being served at the airport. Every window was uncovered since one of the first things I had done was removed the blinds, dismantle them and fold the drapes. Hey, when I turned off the electricity the only light we had was from outside during the day or the lights from the generator we used.

I stepped inside followed by my brother and the rest of the entourage. I calmly informed my soon to be ex what I had done. I was preparing the house to split our assets fifty fifty. She demanded to know where 'her stuff was' I waved my hand around the floor and then told her if she was referring to her clothes and personal items, they were all safe and sound in the bedroom closet. When she went to look, she was not happy. I had never heard her issue such a shrill scream in all the years we had known each other. Somebody had called the police and they showed up to listen to my wife scream and yell about how I demolished her home.

I carefully explained what was going on to the first cop on the scene. He immediately called for his supervisor. I do not know exactly what he said, but within minute at least three more units showed up. I'd called my attorney when I knew Ava was on her way home and he finally showed up. He apologized saying he thought he better change clothes before he arrived.

Ava began to rant about where she would go for the night and demanded I be arrested. My lawyer nixed that last idea telling the police I had done nothing illegal. No crime had been committed and that this was a matter for civil court. Doug demanded his wife take him home but Janice refused and then she frowned at him and asked why he never looked at his phone. She had texted him a few hours before.

He still did not look, thinking whatever she sent him had to do with his alleged cheating. Now this is conjecture on my part. What he told his wife was he was 'busy' after Ava was served at the airport. And he would clear up any misconceptions about the business trips.

At this point I was trying to monitor three or four conversations at once. I did answer Ava when she asked what I had done with her car. She and Doug decided that she would drive him where he needed to go since his wife told him he could walk as she was not about to let his cheating ass get into her car. I told Ava very truthfully her car was exactly where she left it, in the garage. She stormed back inside the house. Not two minutes later she stomped back outside and complained the garage door would not open. I told her I was not surprised as the electricity was off, plus I had dismantled the garage door opener. She loudly demanded to know how she was supposed to get her car out. Doug heard her and told her to just pull the emergency release to open the door. She had no idea what that was so he went inside with her. They came back out and he demanded to know where the handle for the release was. I shrugged and told him it was around somewhere, carefully marked like every other item I had taken apart.

The police were taking notes the whole time, asking for statements from one and all. Then Janice dropped her bombshell that she had not called the police yet, but she had an issue at her home. She showed her cell phone to the police lieutenant who seemed to be in charge. I watched his face change to total incredulity. He looked at me. I told him Janice had shown me the photos but I had been here at my own home all weekend and had multiple witnesses.

Unable to get her car out, and with Janice refusing to take Doug home, they called June back. She arrived disheveled, having been crying. Her husband had met her outside their house with all her clothes stuffed into plastic garbage bags. He'd helped her load the bags into her van and told her to leave and not return until she saw her lawyer. He had told me his plans the day before. So now Ava and Doug put their suitcases into June's van.

Janice told him once again he ought to look at his phone. He finally did and then let out with a scream that almost matched those of Ava's. He yelled for June to get him home, fast. I'd given Janice a suggestion when she first called me to tell me what she found and she had already acted on it. Her brother in law had stayed at her home. The cops were finished with what they could do at my house. We'd all given our statements so my brother and I followed the rest to Doug's home.

A television news van was already parked in front of his house. The reporter was interviewing Bret, the brother in law about what the family found when they brought Janice home from her weekend away. Later I found out the camera man had already taken full video of the area. The story Bret told was that they could not pull all the way around the house to park in the garage as the garage doors and most of the drive was blocked with car parts. The garage was around the end of the house and the area was totally obscured from street view.

Nobody stopped me from following them up to the house. The scene was great. Most of you men have put together model cars when you were kids I am sure. Well, what I saw looked just like what you see when you open a model box with the exception of the plastic bars holding the little parts. In the center of the drive was a car chassis. To each side laid the doors. behind the car on the drive was the trunk and in front, the car hood. I was a little surprised the fenders had not been removed as well. Nor had the windshield. Virtually every other piece was though. The engine sat in front of the chassis. Radiator, fan, water pump, starter, generator, carburetor and all the major parts had been removed. All the belts and hoses placed neatly in rows to one side. The transmission and whole drive train was sitting behind the car. The wheels were removed along with the brake assemblies. Even the seats were removed and sitting off to one side. I'm telling ya, it was impressive. I'd never seen a car totally or almost totally taken apart. Everything was laid out very neatly. Not that any of that mattered.

Doug lost it. He began to wail and even started crying. He dropped to his knees and screamed that "Sally was destroyed". I asked Janice who was Sally. The television reporter was standing close by while the cops walked around the car looking over the scene. I can tell you I fell over laughing when Janice explained Doug named his car Sally. Mustang Sally like the song.

I know you all heard about that part. Once the news reporter broadcasted her report, the story was picked up by the network and then made the full rounds on social media. They played the song Mustang Sally as backdrop. None of us spouses were hiding. We all made sure the three cheaters were named. Doug accused each of us for the damage to his car but we all had ironclad alibis. June's husband, Bill worked all day Saturday at the dealership and was with their kids that night and all day Sunday. He had the expertise to dismantle the car and possibly the resources, but the investigators could not link him to anybody who might have been responsible. Apart from Doug's not a single fingerprint could be found on any part. The police had even checked the lug nuts that had been carefully piled together.

Janice was with her sister and brother in law for the weekend and even her kids testified to that. She loudly proclaimed she had not even thought of doing anything to the car but if she had, it would have been with a hammer. And she was still considering using a hammer on the parts and finishing the job. Even the cops were laughing, hearing that.

Of course because of the careful way the car had been dismantled and the parts not damaged, I was the number one suspect. But I also had an alibi. First of all, I am not a mechanic. I know home repair and renovation, not how a vehicle might be put together. I did not have much more than a couple screw drivers and a few wrenches anyway. Plus I was busy taking apart my home under the amused and watchful eyes of my neighbors.

The whole event at Doug's house was a circus. Ava was there because she had no other transportation other than June who had been kicked out of her home by her husband. My father in law soon showed up after receiving a call from Ava. He stood wide-eyed watching the extravaganza unfold.

The reporter called me for a followup the next day. She'd heard what I'd done to my home and wanted to add that as an angle to her story. I gave her one of the twenty or so flash drives I had made of how I systematically dismantled my home. She condensed five hours of video into a two minute television segment. Those flash drives proved to save my butt so far. I gave them out like candy at Halloween. Of course since I only had twenty drives, I'd also included the evidence of the three culprits cheating. Doug had got a restraining order for me to not publish a thing about his infidelities. But by the time the order was issued, almost all of those drives had been distributed. I had no control when some of the evidence which included them discussing their affair and even video of a few of their encounters made the rounds on the internet. Even my father in law got a flash drive when he asked me if I might "be over-reacting to perceived events".

Doug was totally embarrassed to be seen switching places with his two female partners. Him taken up the butt by June's dildo while he had his face planted in Ava's crotch was the most humiliating and was cut out of the television segments but did show up online. That the three were videoed in flagrante delicto was mentioned often, even on television.""

"Now as of today, my status is still up in the air. I intend to push for the divorce to be finalized as soon as possible, but Ava wants to stay married for the sake of the baby. The paternity test which my wife initially protested showed I am not the father of her unborn child. I had to pay extra to get the test expedited but since the child is not mine, I'll get some of my money back from the communal assets. Ava wanted the opportunity to discuss the matter privately and wait until the baby was born to test, but I had made it so public, she had no option but to submit to the test despite her attorney's advice. I have no idea what she plans to do or if Doug will step forward. He might not even be the father for all I know. That is not my concern."

"My wife got an attorney who claimed I destroyed my home. Mine of course claimed I merely 'took back' my work and none of the components were damaged and everything is ready for resale."

"From the last I heard, the investigation into who dismantled Doug's mustang has come up empty. The working theory is it has to be a team of experienced mechanics. Somebody with the expertise to remove the major components and not leave a total mess. Oil, transmission fluid, coolant and even brake fluid was drained and none of the parts were damaged when taken apart. Even Bill, June's husband admitted to the investigators what it would take to take the car apart like that. Components that might be compromised like the manifold covers and valve assemblies were left alone."

"Bill told me privately, he would like to hire the men as they were fast and obviously 'knew their stuff'. He told me as much as he loved it, he had nothing to do with taking the Mustang apart and asked if I had. I honestly told him I had not."

"Doug paid through the nose to get the parts picked up and stored. Janice told him he had two days to remove the "junk" as she called it from her drive so she'd have access to her garage. Otherwise, she'd hire a couple neighborhood boys to pile the crap'' under the carport where Doug had kept the car. He knew she was serious."

"Before any of you think I came out on top of any of this, I was not unscathed. The very next day after Ava's return home, I was immediately fired from my job. I knew my boss is a good friend of Doug's. Doug sent him clients and in turn he recommended Doug when the need arose. My boss had even been the one to originally suggest Ava go to work for Doug. When I was told I was fired, I leaned over my boss's desk and asked him point blank if he had been party to any of the sex play and more specifically, asked if he had fucked my wife. He denied everything but that did not keep me from having a little talk with his wife to make the suggestion I suspected he might have."

"My ex-boss' claim I was poaching clients was dismissed when I demonstrated I'd brought many of them to the firm in the first place. A few others made the statement they did not trust the man after he fired me. I've agreed to handle all the accounts who followed me pro bono for two months while I work for my brother for minimum wage. Ava's attorney claim I am deliberately avoiding having a substantial income. I claimed I was simply helping friends while I determine my future career. I opened my fledgling, part-time pro bono accounting firm in an unused office in my brother's building. If any of you need an accountant, let me know."

I got a few cheers from the audience. I felt a little better about my circumstances, but I had to admit, I lost a wife, my home and my dreams. All irretrievable.

Three weeks later:

Once again I walked into the anger management support group that several of us had dubbed 'cuckolds anonymous.'

I stepped to the podium. "I see many of the same faces here. I guess you are here for the same reason I am. It is hard to get control of your emotions. Well, let me rephrase, it is hard to keep them under control all the time. As my and I am sure your therapists say, it is a fine line between depression and anger. I talk to both the therapists now. To be honest it was NOT my choice. I know some of you had to come here because the court mandated it. I am here because my sister in law demanded it."

"We were all sitting at the dinner table and my eight year old nephew asked loudly, 'Uncle Gary are you pissed off all the time because Aunt Ava was such a bitch?' Well 'pissed off' and 'bitch' are key words for my sister in law. When asked where he heard that, my nephew pointed at me and said he heard me talking to his Dad. My sister in law looked at me to fix the situation so I said very carefully that it is really not polite to use the word bitch but yes I was very upset with Aunt Ava. Then I hit the trifecta of key words when he said, 'Okay, I won't say that again. I like her. It's too bad she is a cunt.' "

"You can imagine the glares I got from my sister in law. My brother was no help at all. He just stared at his plate and shook as he tried to keep from laughing. My sister in law told me very quickly that if I wanted to keep my 'boys' I better learn to watch what I said around the kids. Now my six year old niece got into it and said 'Boys'? I didn't know Uncle Gary had ANY kids. Where are they?"

"My sister in law said the boys were me, her dad, and brother. Then the little six year old, bless her heart, said, "Oh so when you told Miss Sandy your 'girls' were sore and tender from too much rough play, you meant because I fell and skinned my knee when..." To be honest I did not hear how she finished because I was laughing too hard. But my sister in law was beet red."

"Okay, long story short. If I want to live with my brother and his family, I continue my therapy, including these group sessions." I announced. "I cannot afford to live on my own. Right now, I have no income. I wanted to decrease what I made for the divorce, but people do not realize how difficult it is to even find an apartment without verifiable income. My sister in law is a lovely woman and generous to a fault. She just does not want her kids influenced negatively by my misfortunes. More key words to go along with those others I mentioned."