All Comments on 'David'

Good story although the ending felt a little rushed to me.

Enjoyed it but the jumping from one family member to another were too quick with little emotional implications of what was happening. The ending was rushed a bit and I would have rather had another page or two to wind it down properly. Still, well written story and narrative, just s few plot glitches. 4*

i like the story but ending did not fit AAAA+++

the ending was rushed, david goes from a no girl getting virgin to a sex god in a week or two. and he kinda comes off as a jerk as if having sex with his sisters and mom is a chore and not something he really wants

I don’t think he saw it as a chore, but more along the lines of something that shouldn’t be done between family members. He was always reluctant to have a sexual relationship with any of his family members so that may be the reason why it seems like he sees it as a chore. On top of that, he viewed all sexy acts as acts of love, but the only person he had romantic live with was Carol.

All the build-up, then "bam!", agreement, marriage, kids in 2 paragraphs...liked the story, a bit of a letdown at the end. Still, a good story.

I agree with the last commenter. The build up was great but the ending seemed very rushed. Four stars.

Absolutely a 5+ if ever there was one. I especially loved the terse narrative. It was such a blissful relief from all of the usual 'screaming and yelling' styles of so many of the other authors. Much more please . . .

Great story line. Your attention to detail was superlative in that the narrative was sequential and didn't trip all over itself. I especially appreciated that you didn't feel the need to resort to all of the vulgar language that seems to be favored by so may other authors of this genre. Now; given his stated level of inexperience I felt that his initial interaction with Abby (and the other family members) was somewhat abrupt and did not display any hint of hesitation or reluctance on his part. I do have to agree with some of the previous comments in that the ending scenario was too compressed. I still give this piece a well deserved five stars plus . . . .