Dear Diary Ch. 10

This is the true account of my first return to the local bathhouse since before the Covid shutdown. I went there hoping to bottom. Didn't work out quite as planned--but I spent hours in a huge, ongoing orgy with multiple partners. Quite the Roman holiday. No complaints here!

The bathhouse nearest to me is an hour away in normal traffic. Like other such establishments, it is a warren of hallways lined with private rooms furnished with bed, side table, and pegs on which to hang clothes. (Clothes I always shed in a heartbeat.) Off the narrow corridors are bathrooms, showers, and larger rooms suitable for orgies, to be blunt. The biggest of these are the large video room, and the somewhat smaller terraced video room.

You enter the large room through a set of curtains to see a bank of video monitors on the far wall showing quality hardcore gay porn. The room has an enormous mattress on a raised platform, with facing leather-upholstered benches on the remaining two walls, backed by mirrored walls. A pair of stools, like unto the ones in a high school chemistry lab, stand parked just inside the inner curtains.

Here, years earlier, I deflowered an anal virgin on that mattress in front of an audience on the leather-clad sidelines. As they watched us, I watched myself fucking him in the mirrors. Also on that mattress, a Black man with a stunning body, and amazing endurance, assfucked me for a glorious eternity. To this day, it makes my breath catch at the thought of our naked bodies straining against each other, as his stiff prick plunged deep inside me, over and over again. Here, too, during a crowded orgy, I fucked a skinny Black guy with a bottomless appetite for cock in front of near two dozen masturbating men, many of whom had already fucked him. Sweet memories...

The terraced video room has a bank of monitors above eye level that may be enjoyed from three different levels: The terrace. The surface is linoleum over wooden beam benches, not so gentle for bare bottoms, but bearable if you bring your towel with. The height of the steps is favorable for fellatio or doggy-style fucking, going by my experience. Of course, one can watch the porn...

This is where I first experienced intercrural copulation (fucking my lover's asscheeks) and, during a four-way mini-orgy, first rimmed a man.

So much for memories.

Present day: More than one bathhouse in LA closed for good during the pandemic. The surviving ones picked up the slack. Compared to before, I found the clientele more numerous, younger, less concerned with safer sex than pre-Truvada, and (best of all) completely uninhibited.

The establishment had changed since my last visit. Used to be, you'd get a tray for your valuables that the staff would hold for you, but no more.

I found the place packed, and had to store my clothes in a locker. As I stripped off guys were already eyeing my body. Not something I recalled from past visits.

When I had a room of my own on previous occasions, I liked to spend time lying naked on the bed with an open door, so any man in the hallway would see me masturbating.

The idea was to get good and hard before venturing out to seek partners, but I sometimes snagged them as they walked past. One time a guy came in and sat on my cock without a word. I barely had time to whip on a condom. Another time...Well, you get the idea.

Couldn't do that this time. My solution to this problem was to walk about with towel over my shoulders while stroking myself. At first, I only did that when I saw something arousing, such as other men masturbating or giving blowjobs. It wasn't long, however, before I simply jacked off everywhere I went to keep hard--and because a sneaking sense of naughtiness made even solitary masturbation exquisitely pleasurable. I didn't care who watched me. Every time a man caught me stroking my cock while looking him in the eye, he knew for certain I was glad to see him.

At an intersection of hallways there was a flatscreen TV showing gay porn. I stopped to enjoy the show. Almost immediately a man walked up to me. In no time we were stroking each other's cocks. Unexpected, but promising.

He wanted to fuck me. I wanted, above all, to bottom, but still felt the need to cruise the place stroking myself while warming up; as previously noted, I liked that, and it was too early for me.

Plus, he was coming on a bit strong for my taste. Still, he was friendly, if overeager. I enjoyed his assistance maintaining my erection. I'd be ready to fuck soon enough, and the thought of him thrusting inside my body made me feel hot and bothered.

I'd been on my way to check out the large video room. From earlier visits, I knew the action was most intense there. He followed me, and we resumed stroking each other in front of a crowd. Love doing that! I had to pull away before getting too excited.

Another man came up and grabbed me by the penis. After pumping it hard he put it between his thighs and we copulated intercrually. Sweet!

He wanted me to fuck him bareback. I admired his bud exposed between spread cheeks, but doing the dirty unprotected with a complete stranger is a bridge too far for me, no matter how aroused I get. Besides, I wanted to bottom!

My first partner and I wandered all over the bathhouse together, stopping to jerk each other off every few feet. I was getting a real workout in his hands.

Once I was ready to fuck, I led my faithful companion to one of the outdoor areas.

He's not wild about it, worries about the sunlight being too hot, but he wants to fuck too much to say no.

I want him to fuck me outdoors, to feel sunlight bathing my naked body as his ramrod-stiff prick slides in and out of my asshole like a piston, making my cock swell and twitch and stiffen until, rock-hard in the warm air, it explodes with pleasure in a no-hands prostate orgasm.

The warm air feels good on my body. We masturbate each other in sunlight. We're both hard; I'm teetering on the edge, and pull away. My cock waves in the air. My breath comes shallow and fast.

I'm ready, lube packet and condom in hand.

He looks at the condom.

"You wanna use that? You don't wanna fuck bareback?"

I do not.

Our parting was friendly, if marred by disappointment on both sides. At least we got to jerk each other off in the warm sunlight...

I went back inside looking for action elsewhere. On my return to the large video room I found an orgy under way. It was well on the road to a regular three-ring circus.

The ethnic mix this day, in descending order, was Latino, white, Black, and Asian. I eyed the Black guys with interest. I've had gay sex with many Black men, but could not get a good read on whether this crowd wanted to play with me or not.

They didn't mind in the least letting me watch them fuck. One of the Black men was hands-and-knees on the mattress. Another ground his cock in and out of the first one's ass. He took his time and made each thrust count. A third man knelt in front of the bottom. The bottom lashed this one's cock with a wicked tongue.

I put my towel on a stool, sat on it, feet dangling off the ground, and paid close attention to my own cock as I watched the show.

It went on and on and on. Men approached me as I jerked off on my stool. I would move my hand from my cock to theirs, and they would stroke mine for me. I kept this up until I felt I needed to cool off or blow my nut, which I was not ready to do!

To calm down, I left the large room and walked through the halls seeking the terraced room. Mirrors on doors or at jinks in the passages let me admire my naked body, hand pumping my cock. Oh, I enjoyed watching myself beat off in the mirrors as I walked the corridors! Silly, I know, but I liked the extra tingle.

As I wandered the hallways from large room to terraced, or back, I passed rooms with door open and a naked man reclining comfortably against the bolster, looking me in the eye while masturbating, exactly like I enjoy doing. Twice I stopped and stood at the threshold, letting the other watch me fondle my own cock, hope springing eternal. Both times the man smiled and shook his head, not now, thanks. I thought it a pretty sight, even so.

But a splendid vision greeted me in the terraced room. A tall blonde Adonis stood on the highest level of the terrace, at the back of the room, gazing benignly at the head of the man sucking his cock. That man stroked himself, and two others flanking Adonis stared, rapt, at his crotch as they did the same. A lovely four-way. I stood there long, pounding away at my own throbbing member.

After that, I went outside to savor, once again, the sensation of masturbating naked in sunlight, in hopes of meeting someone similarly inclined. No joy. I retraced my steps to the large room, full circle.

My eyes kept returning to a guy leaning over the big mattress, legs spread so all of us could see his lubed asshole. The longer I stroked myself and ogled his exposed bud, the hornier I got, increasingly tempted to plunge inside him, to feel his warm asshole wrapped around my bare cock...getting more and more spooked at how much I liked that thought ...

The original three-way continued, but with, I think, a changing cast. The lucky guy in the center (not to be confused with Pierre) remained the same, patiently sucking one cock after another, patiently taking one cock up his ass after another. I could, however, be mistaken in this, distracted as I was as my hand wandered to a cock other than mine, or vice-versa.

In my absence, a second three-way had started. My lovers and I feasted eyes on the writhing buttocks and gyrating hips of the men servicing the bottoms, and on the sight of the bottoms sucking cock. Those in the room not fucking or sucking jerked off as they watched, together with me and my lovers.

Somehow, sad to relate, my lovers and I never got to the point where I took one of their lovely stiff pricks up my own ass.

After a spell watching the fun, but with no one else to stroke my cock, I went back to the terraced room. Gorgeous hunk still stood tall in the back of the room, but I think different mouths wrapped around his cock, and different masturbators flanked him. Like others in the room, I jerked off as I watched him. Then I explored the sights in the hallways and smaller open areas on the way back to the large room...

... where a third three-way had started up! Again I sat on the just-too-tall stool and masturbated myself silly, watching all the thrusting buttocks, the fucking and sucking, and exchanging handjobs with more lovers. There were at least a dozen men in the room with me, all of us aroused, all erect. All drunk on sexual tension strong enough to bend starlight.

Lather, rinse, repeat: I followed this pattern for hours.

Those who see in our acts nothing but shallow hedonism, mindless debauchery, and dissipation ignore the tenderness of shared desire, desire scorned, for many of these men, by family or swathes of the wider world. What we share with each other's bodies answers a need for human contact in its most intimate and vulnerable state, of complete nakedness.

None of us are angels. Gay men can be guilty of racism, or transphobia, or worse. I've had gay sex with gangbangers. Many times: Men who, were we to meet elsewhere or at another time, might rob me; kill me in the blink of an eye. But men who, like so many who frequent bathhouses, are closeted.

Shared desire begets a truce. In the country of desire, we are allies, we are friends. More: If only for a moment, we are lovers. Desire, impossible to hide here, obliterates conflicts that divide us outside these walls. I know nothing more honest than gazing on a naked man's erect penis while he ogles mine; nothing that better dissolves all else in the face of our mutual need.

I make my final visit to the terraced video room, with gorgeous hunk still getting sucked off while others stand beside him and jerk off like me. At the same time a scrum of men surrounds me at the other end of the room.

I'm ready; I let one of them take my cock in his mouth. He sucks me off to a belated, intense orgasm.

By then, my cock truly has had a massive workout, at my hand, and the hands of others. Hours of intense shameless pleasure for me! I have seldom felt so poignantly gay. The memory has me stroking my cock as I write these words.