Debtor's War Pt. 02

"Make a few more for later. I would like to meet your sister."

***

The loud woman that demanded money from Lugoz was his good neighbor, Jenny Wasche. If she'd not paid the gang master, the old man would have been carted off by the army and severely punished days ago, as per Hoffmeister Salm's decree. As it was, Lugoz escaped censure and was at last being taken care of in his grumpy old age. The man was half deaf as well as half blind, according to his neighbour his temper had never been sociable. Nevertheless, he tolerated Claudia and I.

I can't do the old man justice. Grief and misfortune often harden a person, but I still think of him fondly. We walked with him, shoring him up on the unpaved streets as he went about his mercantile business. Claudia cooked and cleaned for the three of us, while I turned my hand to selling his dwindling stocks of leather and rawhide to armourers and craftsmen.

The money was good, the trade brisk. With the army controlling the river, production was on hold, and besides, the days were short. People respected Lugoz. With the good clothes Enzo had given me, the shameless confidence that whoring with soldiers had forced, the work suited me well.

Lugoz was nothing like the sharp toothed bogeyman we'd imagined as children. He bragged that he'd been a gate guard in his youth, but once married he'd worked alongside his father in law, trading hides to make his fortune. His late wife's family had licenses to sell fish from the Donau west of town, and to tan leather on the southern bank of the Wien. Lugoz built up both tanning and fishing businesses with his father in law and became a guilded merchantman. I vaguely remembered playing with his grandson, a slim faced serious looking lad. He died the same year as both our mothers, Lugoz said, the same winter many others succumbed to sickness.

In the evening, we sat beside the stone hearth, kept company with him and listened to the heavy fighting in the distance. Old Lugoz led our prayers as a father would. We slept on either side of him and warmed his bed, chaste as angels. His dog warmed all our feet.

I say I slept, I suffered the most horrendous nightmares. The old dog spared me from the worst, his wet tongue lapping insistently at my hand until I startled awake. Then I roused myself in the dead of night and drank a mug or two of ale, gave my new friend half a sausage, and let him run out and see to his business. Bless his bones.

I knew guilt, I wore every shade of it like a harlequin's coat turned inward against my skin. I worried for Tamas, I missed Neni, I missed... did I miss Enzo? Or did I miss the mad idea that he loved me, and that he could change? Would he come after me? Would he hurt my strange little family?

I came to see that I'd always known love, just hadn't realised how precious it was. I felt whole again knowing Claudia was safe.

Still, she hurt herself when she thought no-one was watching. I kept all the knives tucked in my apron just in case, but she could abuse anything. I saw her put fingers in the lamp flame or against the hot skillet, force the edge of the table against her wrist, stick a sewing needle in her hand.

Why?

She couldn't answer, and I couldn't bring myself to ask.

When we were still living in our father's house, some boy had caught her alone and asked her who she'd marry. Claudia slapped his face, told him that she would only marry me.

Father beat her, and afterwards she lay awake for hours, scratched the skin raw down both arms.

***

We'd been staying with Lugoz for almost a week. The old man was taking a nap after breakfast, Claudia was inside mending clothes, I was in the out house filling the hay net for the donkey. I'd already gone through the inventory just as Lugoz taught me, counting it all and making sure there were no rodents or damp spots among the cured hides. I dusted off my dress, turned around and Radu was standing in the doorway.

"Oh fuck..." I covered my mouth and stared in horror.

He stepped in and closed the door behind him. "Calm down. I could have killed you twice over before you realised I was here. Point your pigsticker elsewhere."

The blood was pounding in my ears, I hadn't realised my little knife was in my hand. "What do you want?"

"Only to talk." He sat on a bale, raised his hands up where I could see them. "No-one would dare lay a finger on you, Sparrow."

"I don't want to talk," I backed as far from him as I could, "I have nothing to say. You know I keep my mouth shut, Radu, I swear."

"No shit." He spat on the earthen floor and smirked. "But you'll listen."

I did. I had the measure of Radu, and did not trust him an inch.

"The boy lived, by the way. Your boy, Tamas? He's weak, but he's awake now, says he can't remember what happened. He asked after you, is all, I told him you're playing at being a merchant. And the Magyar goodwife, Neni, is it you call her? They're both stationed up at the palace kitchen. With Enzo."

He paused again. I said nothing, but relaxed just a little. While we were talking there was still a chance he meant no ill.

"He's on crowd control for the bread dole. Pissed off and miserable as you can imagine, so far from battle. Who cares, eh? He brought it on himself."

"I don't ever want to hear his name, Radu. He's dead to me."

"Ha!" he scoffed. "Your face says different."

"No. This is just what my face looks like when I'm not in constant fucking pain."

"That so?"

He was so fast. He had my own knife up against my throat in a heartbeat, his hand clasped tight over my mouth. He bent me over the bale of rawhide he'd just been sitting on, ground his hips against the back of my thighs.

"If you scream," he whispered quietly, "if you fight me, you will watch me cut your sister's throat. And the old man too, do you understand me?"

I nodded, eyes blurring with tears.

"You want to see that?"

I shook my head no and he chuckled to himself. "I'm just playing with you, Sparrow. You have the look of someone who hasn't had a good fuck in too long. Am I right?"

I nodded far less enthusiastically.

He took his hand from my mouth. "P... please, sir, don't hurt them, please... I won't tell..."

"I know your worth." He grasped my arm so hard I thought he'd break it, then pushed me aside and I fell hard onto my bare knees. Something thudded onto the earthen floor, shrouded in black cloth.

"Bring your sister to Sacred Heart tomorrow night. If she's not there, I'll be digging a grave for both of you." He frowned in mock confusion and stroked his chin. "On second thoughts, stay home with grandpa, but I'll be disappointed, won't I?" He shook his head. "You're not as dumb as you look."

I heard the door swing closed at last. I got up, dusted myself down. I gathered up the ominous bundle of rags. Of course it was a pair of damn masks wrapped up in black robes.

My arm was marked with livid bruises where his fingers bit into my pale skin, but my sleeve hid the worst of it. Still, Claudia knew something was wrong the second she saw my ashen face. Just how was I going to explain everything to her?

I showed her the two masks, one wooden moretta, the other of bone white porcelain.

"Like Miss Gerta and her boy?" Claudia said. She took the black mask and held it up to the light. "They're so in love, you wouldn't believe it from the way they speak to each other but..."

"Boy?" Stojan must have been fifty years old.

She pursed her lips. "Well... Gerta wears the sword. They go out together dressed like this every full moon."

"It's not just some sex thing! This is dangerous, they're dangerous people. I'm not going to drag you into it."

"Shh, don't be silly. So long as we're together, I can be brave as you."

"They kill people," I hissed. I glanced at the old man but he was still breathing slow and even. "They murder women the worst way you could possibly imagine. I couldn't stand it if... if..." A dull ache throbbed behind my eyes. I pictured the gold coronet rolling in the brave noblewoman's stinking remains.

The dog came over and nuzzled my hand, gently washing the guilt off me with his broad tongue. I sat and petted his head, and though the image remained, the pain passed. It wasn't my fault, the butcher's 'sacrament', any more than my brothers' awful agony. Their remains had been food for hounds, just as the women had been food for rats. Life had been this way before my birth and would be so long after it.

Claudia took the other mask from my hands and set them both aside. When she put her arm around me, the dog slunk off to rest at his master's feet.

"We'll get through this together," Claudia said gently. "You're all I ever had, and all I ever needed."

I could have stopped her I suppose, but I had always survived by giving myself without hesitation, and she took me by surprise. A woman's kiss, my sister's kiss, soft lips pressed against mine. Gentle fingers settled in my hair, slipped under my coiled braids as her tongue explored my mouth for the first time. In my bliss I closed my eyes, allowing her sensual taste to captivate me.

She pulled away when the old man stirred in his sleep.

"Claudia," I breathed. My body burned with confusion and need. The space between us was torture.

Her eyes twinkled with joy or madness. "I knew you wanted me."

We had shared a womb, a home, a bed for years, but in that instant my heart came to life, I'd felt nothing but a shadow of this sin. I reached out and touched her peach soft cheek. "I love you too." I swallowed the lump in my throat, "but we mustn't, we can't... It's too dangerous."

"I know." She smiled sadly, "It was enough to hear you say it."

Oh my heart, it paralysed me. The need to touch her, the need to run from this sanctuary I did not deserve, the need to ring Radu's neck with my bare hands. I let simmering anger burn away my foolish lust. "I hate this. How dare he come here and threaten us. They must think they're untouchable."

"They do," Lugoz chuckled. "Big men. Legends in their own minds."

Claudia yelped and took a few rapid steps back from me. She tripped on her skirts and sat down hard in a half made basket.

"Uncle," I said weakly, "you're awake."

He sat forward in his chair, braced his hands on his knees and took a few deep breaths. It took me a moment to realise he was laughing. I helped Claudia up and stood protectively in front of her, she clutched my hand, shaking.

"Shame on me," he wheezed, wiping a tear from his eye. "Sit. Please. Here at the hearth, not in the bloody wickerwork."

Claudia was terrified. I watched his face for any sign of disgust or anger, but his one eye was lit up with mischief. We knelt on the rug.

"Let's see that arm."

I turned up my sleeve and showed him the darkening hand print.

"Scared of the brute, are you?"

"No, uncle Lugoz, it's his masters. I'm scared for my sister."

"You talk in your sleep you know?" the humour was suddenly gone from his voice. "You ask me for nothing, you're both good girls. Your uncle will see you safe, come. Help me up out of this damn chair."

Claudia moved to help him but I stayed her hand. "Wait," I said firmly. "No more games please. What's your plan for us?"

"Me?" He put his wrinkled hand on his heart. "I don't have much power to my name, but I've earned my peace. I won't have people threatening my girls, I won't have either of you running the streets after curfew, and I have masters of my own."

"That's..." I shook my head. It was so much hot air, one old man and a couple of city guards were no match for Enzo's hundred and their unholy Lady.

Claudia ignored me and helped Lugoz out of his chair.

"No!" I said, exasperated. "What masters? What power? What damn peace? The day I came here there was a mob outside trying to get you arrested! The guards are all in on it, remember?"

"Not everyone gets... old," Lugoz chuckled. "And not everyone forgets promises."

"If he thinks I've told anyone, he'll kill both of you!"

"Right attitude, but you have the wrong idea. If I'm so helpless, why would he keep it a secret from me at all? Why not lord it over all three of us? Why did he wait until you were on your own in the outhouse? Why not rape you, Elizabeth? Why not rob you? Believe me when I say I can help you."

"Then tell the truth!" I clenched my fists as I stood up, "instead of playing the same games they do, let us make our own choice!"

"Please don't get angry, Elizabeth," Claudia said anxiously, "you can see he's not like them."

Lugoz swayed on his feet, steadying himself with his stick. "Choose then. You know your own mind. Walk out with me now, I'll give you my name, and when I'm dead this place is yours."

It was my turn to laugh. "Why would you... I'm a fucking barrow man's daughter! I'm a whore! I stole from you, I lied to you. This is a joke, right?"

"Do I look like I'm joking?" He did not. His one eye was sharp as flint, his knuckles white on the pommel of his stick. "I'll see him dead, the arrogant prick. He'll not lay a finger on you again."

He offered me his arm and I took it.

***

It was slow going, with many stops along the way. When we came to a halt two doors from the Bürgermeister's hall I thought it was just another rest.

"Well?" Lugoz said, "what are you waiting for? Go on in. Buy your freedom. I'll wait right here for you."

"Just like that?" I scoffed.

"Just so."

I opened my mouth, closed it, opened it again.

Claudia rolled her eyes, "This is a first."

"Piss off, I'm not messing around! Who do I ask for? What do I say?"

Lugoz patted my shoulder, and eased himself down onto the edge of a water trough with a groan.

"You give the doorman a shilling for his troubles and ask for the Bürgermeister's clerk. You give the clerk a shilling and tell him I sent you. Young Nathan'll give you the third degree, you tell him you've no other guardian but yourself, then you give him another shilling for his troubles, let him trawl through his books. He'll need to find the parish you were baptized in, and who your father belonged to. If it all checks out you can buy yourself from your Lord and you'll be a free bird."

"And if it doesn't?" I baulked.

"Worst case, you get a clip round the ear and lose three shillings."

"What about me?" Claudia said indignantly.

"Once your sister is a free woman, she can buy you out a lot cheaper than you can free yourself. You won't have to pay the clerk twice, since you'll already know the details."

"Couldn't you buy us both out yourself to start with?"

"No. Then you'd be my adopted daughters and the next step becomes impossible," Lugoz said wearily. "Look, until you're a citizen, you'll be at the mercy of any freeman, and I'm not getting any younger. Think hard on that before you walk away."

"She's not walking away." Claudia caught my arm and pulled me close, I didn't fight her. When she moved back her eyes were wild. "You're not walking away! Just remember how... how fucked we were just a year ago, no, a week ago. I know you can do this Elizabeth, please try."

"Calm down, I didn't say no." I'd played with the idea of real freedom in my mind, in my darkest days and in absurd dreams, but I'd never for one second imagined it could happen for me. Or that all I needed to make it happen was coin and courage. Three shillings for the clerk and then?

"What am I worth?"

"You have enough."

"I have two groschen, eight shillings and four coppers."

"You have enough, trust Lugoz. Tell them I sent you."

I smoothed the few straggling hairs under my veil, rinsed the smut off my hands in the trough and splashed some cold water on my face. I crossed myself for good measure. "God help me."

"That's the spirit," Old Lugoz laughed.

The grand house seemed to loom bigger the closer I got, a wooden framed hall on a stone foundation. The double doors were wide open, and a guardsman stood to attention outside. He didn't give me a second glance as I walked past him up the three wide steps.

About a dozen men stood dotted around the hall, engrossed in their own dealings. There were no women at all. Not one. I was supposed to ask the doorman to summon the clerk. I stood by the door wringing my hands, sweat prickling on my face. There was an empty little desk and chair just inside, but no bloody doorman. I could feel myself flushing red and took a few deep breaths to steady my nerves.

This wouldn't do at all, I scolded myself. I had run with the devil, fought demons with my bare hands, this was nothing. Except it wasn't. What did all these disparate people have in common?

They were the kind of people who set their dogs on children for poaching rabbits, they were the kind of people who would be outraged by my ambitions of freedom.

I cast my eye from one esteemed person to another, paying attention to their mannerisms, their clothes and ornaments. A basket handled blade and flounces on his collar and cuffs, marked one as a foreigner, they all wore their best. Silks and gold chains abounded. I recognised the bright peacock colours, steel plate armour and feathered helm of a noble landsknecht.

"Are you lost, love?" the knight asked. The foreigner he'd been speaking to drifted off to mingle with others.

I shook my head and attempted to look elsewhere, but it was a bit late for that.

"Don't be nervous. Who are you with?"

Oh God. "I need to speak to the Bürgermeister's clerk." Thank goodness I sounded braver than I felt.

"Oh? I'm informed that ordinary business is suspended. Until Thursday, I believe."

Shit. Great. "I did not know that... sir."

He laughed, not unkindly it must be said. "Happy to be of service, Miss..."

"Sorry, sir. I have to go."

"If you must." He bowed deeply.

I turned and fled, and ran smack into a knight in shining plate armour. It hurt. I cupped my hand under my nose and pinched as I tried to skirt around him half dazed but he grasped my elbow to stop me falling and guided me rather forcefully into a seat.

"You!" He barked, "fetch help here at once!" He pressed his own linen kerchief against my face to catch the blood streaming from my nose and eyebrow. "My most sincere and unreserved apologies young maid, I am mortified beyond all measure."

"Please, it's nothing, sir, I'm fine," I prattled, "it was stupid running full tilt like that through a door way, really, my friends are right outside, if you just..."

"Nonsense, you're bleeding! Here. Hold it firmly, like this." He snapped his fingers impatiently at someone and they produced a softer piece of muslin for me to use.

"You're so kind," I stammered.

"What is all this fuss?" a woman's voice, and well heeled court shoes tapping closer. "Did you strike her, Daniel?"

"Of course not mother, it was an accident."

Daniel? Fucking Daniel! I squinted up at him and tried to get a good look. His voice had deepened a bit but it was definitely him. I almost swooned when it hit me. This was all a huge mistake.

"Is there somewhere the maid can lie down and recover, your grace?" another man asked.

"Please, I just need to go home."

"Who is she?" the woman asked sharply, "what's her business here?"

"She's a petitioner," the knight drawled, "didn't realize the court, the assizes, whatever, aren't on today."

"Oh, what a shame." The lady bustled her son out of the way and sat right beside me. "Lean forward love. You don't want any of that muck in your belly, you'll get sick."

I sat still, somewhat resigned to my fate but hopeful. Even if he recognised me he wouldn't give my secret away, not with his mother right here.

"What was your petition, dear? My husband is not as heartless as some believe, and for your troubles, I'm certain he'll hear your case. For all that his son's a clumsy oaf." she added sharply.

"Really?" I sat up and dared to look at her. A plain face, fair skin, laughter lines deepened by her kindly smile.