Decoding Desires Ch. 07

"No, I just don't get it. How is it a reward? It hurts."

He looks at me, then tilts my head up so I'm looking at him. "We don't have to, I can reward you another way. But, it hurts, yes, but you like the pain, don't you? You seemed to the other day."

I try to look away cause I'm so freaking embarrassed, but I can't. "Yes," I whine, barely audibly. He's watching me, obviously worried.

"Let's do sensory play tonight as a reward, okay?"

"Sorry," I apologize, feeling out of my element.

He smiles softly and I still want to look away, but he's still holding my chin. His eyes are locked on mine and the moment is intense. "Don't be. You said it before, but I love everything we've done together, too. Let's take it a little at a time, okay?"

I nod and he leans in and kisses me gently on the lips, just a simple brush, but it's got my heart pounding hard. "Yeah," I breathe when he pulls away. "Okay."

He releases my face and I sway. He catches me by the arm then tugs me towards his room and I follow. The smell of his room has my eyes rolling back, it smells so good. Like, leather and Lee, and I think I'll always associate the two for the rest of forever.

"Take off as much clothing as you want," he directs.

I look at him, a little confused. "Huh?"

"This's for you. I want you to be comfortable, so be comfortable."

It's uncharted territory for me, so many choices. It's probably because I'm kinda fucked up from all of my Jace relationships, but it feels like I'm being set up. I hate that I feel that way, too, but I can't help it. "Are you sure?"

He cocks his head, looking a little confused. "Am I sure about what? That I want to do sensory play? Yes, I'd like to do sensory play."

"No, I mean, the, um, you didn't tell me what to wear. How much to take off."

He looks a little sad, and that he's sad has made me sad. He cups my cheek with his palm and draws me near again. "Hey, relax, Cody. Undress down to your underwear, then get on the bed on your stomach, all the way on the bed, okay?"

I nod and he pulls his hand away. I'm undressed quickly, but I fumble with the folding. "Sorry, sorry."

He takes my pants from me and pushes me towards the bed. "Cody, relax," he tells me, as if it's that easy. "Just lay down and relax, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, sure," I say, feeling light headed. I lay down on my stomach, then grab a pillow and pull it under my chest. "Sorry Lee."

"Please stop apologizing to me," Lee asks. "It hurts me a little when you apologize for no reason."

I have to stop myself from apologizing for apologizing, but I do. "Okay."

"You're beautiful, Cody. Have I told you that?"

"Hmm?" I ask, turning my head back over my shoulder to look at him. "Oh. Thanks?"

He snorts. "You're beautiful." He climbs onto the bed. I feel slightly pulled towards his weight, then he straddles my ass and it feels like heaven as he seats himself on my body. His fingers dig into my shoulders and I cringe, my skin feeling a little crispy from all the sun earlier.

"Sorry," I say, then kick myself internally. "Probably shoulda put on more sunblock. I know better, but I was having so much fun. I think I'm sunburnt."

Lee stops touching me and it's a crime against humanity, but also my skin feels like ant bites. "Hold up, I think I have some aloe lotion somewhere. Let me see if I can't find it. Stay right there, and work on relaxing."

I'm smiling as I bury my face in the pillow, my heart so stupid full. I'm not sure I've ever felt this cared for, except maybe by Carrie, but that was different anyway. "Sure," I promise.

I'm dozing when he comes back, I guess I took his order to relax a little too seriously. "Oh, sorry," he apologizes when he wakes me. "I found the aloe." He shows me a bottle of green gel.

"Cool," I say, sleepy-happy.

"You still wanna do this?"

"Aloe away, captain," I mumble. He climbs back onto my body and squirts the gel on my back. It feels wonderful, cold and soothing. He starts to rub it in. He's so gentle that it barely hurts. I fall asleep three times, jerking awake each time as he works the magic gel into my shoulders and neck, along my upper back.

"You should put some on your face, too," he says as I'm drifting off a fourth time. "Before you sleep. You look a little pink."

"I always look pink," I tell him, but I still accept his dollop of gel in my hand. I rub it into my face and he chuckles, then helps me where it's still gooped on my cheeks.

"Is it too early to tell you that I think I love you?" he asks, not looking at me.

I roll over, he's no longer seated on my butt, then sit up, suddenly wide awake. My whole body feels hot-wired. "No." I don't know what to say, I want to say a million things, and I don't know what any of them are. "Not too early."

"Hey, Cody?"

"Lee?"

He's blushing hard. "I think I love you."

I can't hold myself back. I don't even want to. I launch myself across the space between us and kiss him fiercely. He's startled at first, but returns the kiss quickly enough. "I love you, too," I whisper into his mouth between frantic kisses. He pushes me backwards, back onto my back and I cringe as my sensitive skin hits the sheets and he pulls away.

"No, don't you dare apologize," he warns, pulling me back up into his arms. He doesn't stop until he's on his back and I'm on top of him. "You're sunburnt. Let me take care of you."

"Fuck, Lee," I whisper, wiggling down so I'm laying on top of him, my legs between his, his impressive scepter pressing into my belly. "I love you, too."

He kisses me again, hard, one hand threading through my hair, the other one on my ass. He's very careful not to touch my back as we kiss. The lotion must have lidocaine in it, cause my back is starting to feel tingly. The thought disappears as his hand squeezes my butt, then pulls me forward over his bulge.

"I like swimming with you," he says when we pull apart for breath. "First, you're super sexy in the water, and second, it lets me touch you all over without being super obvious. Have you ever fucked in a pool?"

I shake my head. "Never. You?"

He shakes his head. "Nope. I'd love to try it, though. There's something about how slippery your body is that turns me on. I had to fight to keep from popping in front of your nephews the whole time."

"Do you know how fucking sexy that is?" I ask, feeling breathless. His finger traces my crack and my hole starts twitching like a crackhead. "I wanna have sex in a pool so bad now, but maybe not Carrie's, cause that would be weird, right?"

"Not if they weren't there," he says, a teasing smile on those luscious lips.

"Lee, I want you to fuck me right now," I say, overwhelmed by emotion, and lust.

"This's supposed to be sensory play." He chuckles. "But, your wish is my command," he says, tracing my crack over my underwear again. "Let me get you ready, then you can ride me?"

"Oh, that sounds perfect," I agree, ready to do about anything to get Lee inside of me.

He's yanking my underwear down, grunting in frustration when he can't get them low enough. I climb off him only long enough to pull them off, and then they disappear into his bedroom. I don't care where they went after I threw them. I'm back on Lee, but in the meantime he's taken his pants off, too. He's pulling his shirt over his head, and when I mount him again he's only wearing a pair of silky purple underwear that encase his majesty perfectly.

"You're so fucking perfect," I whisper, rubbing my ass over his spandex sheathed sword. He yanks me down by my hair and then we're kissing again. "I love kissing you, Lee."

He nips my nose, then he pulls my cheeks apart and presses against my bud. His finger slips right in and I'm feeling like a slut, but in the best way possible.

"You're so eager," he praises, his finger quickly finding my prostate. I'm leaning forward, arching my hips into his hands, encouraging him to continue petting me like the sluttiest cat ever. "That's right, open up for me."

"Yes," I moan, collapsing onto his chest as he presses in and out of me. It's dry, though, and I know soon I'll start to chafe. "Need lube."

He nods. "In the closet, there's a small set of drawers. Top drawer," he directs, pulling his finger from my needy hole. I whine a little before I climb off him and he chuckles, watching me as I roll off the bed. I wander into his closet and the light turns on automatically, startling me momentarily. I quickly find the lube, there are four different kinds in his drawer, but I just pull out the KY, it's the first one I recognize.

He's watching me, sitting up in his bed stroking himself over his underwear. It's so sexy I'm unable to move at first, blinded by how hot he is, how much I want him, and the knowledge that he's mine, at least for right now. He puts his hand out for the lube and I hand it over, but I don't climb back on.

"Cody?"

"Take 'em off," I demand. "Your shorts."

He chuckles. "You're suddenly very demanding," he notes. "I mean, I'm not complaining or anything."

"I just know what I want for a change," I reply. He shimmies out of his underwear and I watch the whole time, still somehow confused as to how I landed someone as amazing as Lee.

He settles himself against the headboard, a big, solid piece of dark wood that attaches to wooden posts on either side. "Are you just gonna look?" he goads.

"Your bed is awesome. Intimidating, but also awesome. It must have cost a fortune." I don't mean to stall, but it's been something I'd wanted to ask about since the first time I saw it.

He looks up, his fingers tracing the post nearest to him. I can see that it's carved, I hadn't noticed it before. "It didn't. I got lucky. An estate sale with my dad after I got discharged from the hospital. We needed a bed that we could put straps on to help me in and out when I was still in the wheelchair, while I was recovering from surgery and doing physical therapy. Dad couldn't afford something new, he'd been calling around all over the place looking for hospital beds that people were selling, looking on Craig's list and Ebay and stuff." He shrugs. "We happened to be driving by an estate sale at some really old house and he stopped on a whim, and then we owned a ninety year old four poster bed frame."

"That is not what I thought you were gonna say at all. I mean, it seems really well suited for, ah, you know, naughty stuff."

He smiles at me, a wickedly playful smile. "I haven't used it for naughty stuff yet, but I have some ideas."

"I would hate if we broke it," I say, not really thinking it through other than the idea of being restrained and teased and fucked by Lee is making me drip.

"What would we do to break it?" he asks innocently, and he's playing with me now.

"Nothing," I mumble, trying not to look at Lee's cock twitching excitedly. "I mean, nothing."

"We don't need to do anything like, um, you know, Sir and Brat stuff, not if you want to just make love again tonight, but if you wanted we could-"

"Sir," I interrupt before he can continue. "Sir, I really don't know how we would break your bed, but I have a few ideas."

He bites his lower lip, rolls onto his knees, then's somehow halfway to his closet with a sudden burst of energy. "Lay on your stomach, Brat," he directs. "No, nevermind. I want you at the headboard, where I was, but I want your hands as far apart on the headboard as you can get them, okay?"

I nod, but he's not looking at me, he's in his closet, which I am discovering is much more of a toybox than a closet. I climb on bed, nervous as hell about what he's gonna do to me, but even more excited. I'm shaking, I can't help it, as I stare at his wall over the headboard, afraid to look back, as if that might ruin the fun.

I feel the bed dip down as he climbs back on and I tense up. "Hey, you good?" he asks, reading my body language. "Cody, if you-"

"I don't want any coffee, Sir," I growl. It comes out more intensely than I meant it to, so I follow it up. "Sorry, just nervous. I'm good."

"Promise me, you'll say it if it's too much?"

I look back at him over my shoulder. "I trust you, Lee. I'll let you know if it's too much. Fucking tie me up already, the waiting is killing me. Sir."

Lee bites his bottom lip and I look away or I'm gonna cum just from the sight of him. He pulls my left arm away from the bed and I feel the now-familiar, buttery soft leather close over my wrist as he pulls the cuff tight. "Too tight?" I shake my head, then turn to watch him work. He pulls a piece of rope through the D-ring on my cuff and then wraps it around the bedpost, then crawls over my legs and repeats this on the other side.

"I really like how the cuffs feel," I blurt out, instantly ashamed by my outburst, but I'm too nervous to hold it in.

He hums his approval, then tugs my right cuff by the rope. He ties it off on the post and moves to the other side. "Scoot back so your head is on the bed," he directs me. I do, and then he ties the left rope to the post. He adjusts both sides until my arms are securely tied to the bed posts, enough slack for me to be semi-comfortable, but not enough to pull them close to my body. I'm feeling very vulnerable, very exposed.

Lee doesn't say anything, and he isn't touching me, and all the silence is making me super nervous. "Sir?" I look over my shoulder to find him stroking himself at the edge of the bed.

"Fuck, Brat," he says, his voice melty chocolate. "How do you feel?"

"Restrained, Sir" I say, then feel dumb. I stop myself before saying something else even dumber.

He smiles at me, melting away my embarrassment. "Good." He climbs up on the bed, then pulls my ass into the air and pushes my knees apart, spreading me wide for his inspection. I squeak when his finger caresses my asshole, I can't help it. "Do you want me to fuck you like this?"

My eyes roll back in my head. "Yes Sir," I hiss. "Please."

He traces my crack, then uses both hands to spread my cheeks far apart. "Your hole is begging me, too," he notes. I try to think of a response, but all thoughts fly from my brain the second his tongue traces my bud. He laughs as I wriggle, then grabs my hips and holds me still before plunging his tongue inside me.

"Fuck, Sir," I moan. He starts sucking and nipping and I'm done, my brain is mush and my little man belongs to Lee, all I am belongs to Lee. He's using his tongue and teeth and now his fingers join in the game and I can't see what he's doing, and soon it gets so intense and confusing I can't even tell what he's doing, but I like it a lot.

I'm panting and moaning as he charms my ass into compliance. I actually forget that I'm bound to his bed for a moment, but am painfully reminded when I try to stroke my little man. Sir pauses as I struggle against my bonds for a second, then chuckles and dives back inside me with renewed vigor.

"I like it when you struggle, Brat," he whispers, his lips teasing my super sensitive skin. "You can't touch yourself when you're bound like this, can you?"

Fuck, he knows what he's doing, and he's fucking good at it. I whine and he's smiling, I can feel it against my ass cheek. "No, Sir," I whine.

"How does that make you feel?"

I'm electrified, my whole body frozen, no longer under my control. I'm whining and he pushes fingers in and out of me while he waits for my answer. Somehow he knows exactly where to press to send shocks all the way down to my toes with each stroke. I feel it when he puts a third finger in, and now I can't stop my hips from swaying in time to his fingers fucking me.

"It makes me feel like I belong to you, Sir," I whisper, so ashamed I'm hiding my head in the pillow, but so horny my hands are fighting with my restraints even though it's a waste of time, Sir has tied me up tight. "Reminds me that my dick belongs to you."

"Good boy," he praises, then rewards me with his lips at my hole and his tongue inside me again. It's over too soon, but he's plunging his fingers inside me a second later, opening me up, turning me up, amping me up. I'm just going up and up and up. "You want me here?" He emphasizes his statement by pushing his fingers as deep as he can, then leaving them planted.

"Yes, Sir," I say, only slightly louder than a whisper. I'm fighting my bonds, I want to touch my dick so bad. I'm so close to something amazing, and I need release. "Please, Sir, fuck me. Please. Please."

"How can I say no when you're asking me so nicely?" he wonders aloud. I hear noise behind me and turn to see him ripping open a condom packet. He slides it down his member with practiced ease and I'm jealous of those faceless men before me who have gotten to see Lee like this, and then I'm not jealous because he's pumping lube directly onto my hole. I tense at the sudden cold wetness, then force myself to relax again.

Once he's satisfied with his prep work he nods, then gets up on his knees and presses my legs further apart and settles between my legs. "Please, Sir, please, sir," I'm chanting as he runs his sheathed cock up and down my crack, coating his majesty in lube. "Please."

"Shh," he coos, then presses his head against my hole. I tighten up reflexively and he slips down my crack and I'm whining, trying to force myself to open up for him. "Shh, I'll give you what you need," he whispers, then presses his head against my hole again. This time he waits until I'm as relaxed as I can force myself to be with the intensity of the situation before he pushes forward.

His head pops through my ring and we both moan together. He takes his time sliding in, opening me up slowly. It's not enough. I thoroughly loved how we made love last time, but I need to be fucked, I need him to fuck me hard. I want him to use me.

"Sir, fuck me," I beg. "Fuck me hard, however you want, pound my ass, please, I need you to fuck me hard."

Sir sinks deeper without saying a word. I'm rocking my hips, I can't help it, then his hands close over my hips. His fingers dig into my flesh and hold me still, and still he's sinking slowly until finally, finally, finally I can feel his balls against my ass.

I'm still begging, pleading with him to fuck me hard, and he's super quiet, and I want to see his face, but I'm also so messed up I can't turn around, I can't make any part of my body function properly. He holds still, planted deep inside me, and says nothing, and eventually I quiet down, too.

"Brat, I'm buried deep inside you while you're tied to my bed, unable to touch yourself." I whine wordlessly and he hums. "Yes, it's frustrating, isn't it?"

"Sir, please," I beg, my tongue feeling too big in my mouth. I love how he feels, so deep inside me, and I also hate it, because I want him to fuck me.

"I could fuck you right now, hard and fast until I cum in your tight ass, and then just leave you like this, hole gaping and used, dick freely leaking, ass up in the air." I whine again and he chuckles. "You would've already jerked yourself off if I hadn't restrained you, wouldn't you?"

"No, Sir," I insist.

"No?" he asks.

"No, my dick belongs to you," I say, barely able to put the words together.

"That's right, this's my cock now." He accentuates his statement by reaching around my body and grabbing my little man, then squeezing him tight.

"Yes, Sir," I agree, trying to rock my hips into his grip. His other hand is still on my thigh, though, restraining my efforts. "I'm yours."

"You want me to fuck you hard, Brat?"

"I need you to fuck me hard, Sir," I beg. "I need you to fuck me hard. Please, fuck me hard."

I feel Sir's dick jump inside me, I can feel his excitement. He's as excited as I am, and that is an aphrodisiac all on its own. "Patience, Brat. I'll give you what you need."

"Thank you, Sir," I moan. Still, he doesn't move and after a few seconds I whine again.

"Shh," he coos, his fingers tracing the curves of my ass. "I'm enjoying how tight you are wrapped around my dick."