All Comments on 'Deja Vue'

You can't force a spouse to behave. Either they want to or they don't.

How can you misspell Deja Vu?

It's a two word, six letter title.

I usually let the small stuff go, but this error caught my eye and actually made me read the story. Was the title meant to involve a pun, a play on words, an ironic take or was it just a simple mistake? I don't see any sign of the former options, so the simple answer appears to be the right one.

I appreciate the warning and I enjoyed your writing but what would it take to give a positive end to the story. She didn't actually cheat and the separation seems to have made her realise the error of her ways so a reconciliation would be appropriate. Sorry but 3 stars only - would be more if you resubmit with a conclusion

Good to see you back!

Great story, but it could use another chapter.

a fairly realistic day in the life type story. solid 3*

Come on, man... Everyone knows it’s “DJ View”

I had the same feeling on the title as tangledweed. I think I've seen titles like "Deja View," where the "misspelling" was a deliberate pun.

Thanks for the warning on no ending, I read anyway since it was only one page.

"she wasn't the beauty pageant contest winner, girl next door. She was pretty but not turn every head in the room beautiful." - This makes no sense to me! Beauty pageant winners AREN'T the girl next door. The second sentence pretty much defines the girl next door!

While she may want to dance more than him, that doesn't mean that he should sit alone all night. I'd find some babe and ask her to dance, and get as handsy as she'd allow.

You've done the relatively easy part, the set-up.

You've skipped the hard part, coming up with a BELIEVABLE conclusion that won't piss off the majority of readers.

I agree with Tajfa that since their was no actual cheating, not even an "emotional affair," I'd give her another chance, but I'd put some strict ground rules. I understand that he doesn't "own" her, but she's shown sone tendencies that are not conducive to a healthy marriage. If it were me, for an indefinite period of time, there would be no GNO's at places with dancing, and when we went dancing, she'd dance only with me. If and when I agreed that she could dance with others, if I felt the dancing was get too "dirty," I would stop it, and she wouldn't argue.

Incomplete.

You decide how bright it looks... it is so much easier after that. Especially if you start bowling!

Been there so I know how this feels. Only difference is we were each others first, no kids, and she also behaved like this when she was just out with her friends, not just with me. Time and again I told her I didn't like it and it was disrespectful as she was the instigator and teasing and touching. Even got to the point of her flashing her tits and ass. Gave her far too many chances. Finally one day out with the girls (heard this from her friend who was there) she even pissed off her girl friends acting so slutty. Took it too far with one guy who tried to drag her away. She slapped him and he punched her so hard be broke her nose. When I got the call and heard what went on I said "Finally, maybe that smacked some sense into her". No one sided with me.

No "legal separation". Why give her more time to screw me over? I went for divorce.

This pathetic whining “I loved her too much...” is just crap. It’s not about control or about lack, it’s about wanting a fucking pity party.

She disrespected him because he let her. But then he tells us they’ve had this conversation before. Really? Well how convenient for the author that he can simply tell is they’ve had this same talk over and over but provide no evidence of it. And at 45 years old, she is going to go dancing damn near every weekend for hours.

Really? Do you have any idea how exhausting that is? How much the knees hate all the bouncing? How desperate middle aged men and women look at a club while wearing some barely there number dry jumping some random partner?

I mean, really. You want us to believe that she wouldn’t rather be at home watching Netflix in a pair of comfy pyjamas and instead chooses to go clubbing?

I’m 45 and the last place either myself or my 45 year old wife wants to be is at some bar bouncing our asses off while half cut and gyrating on some stranger half our age. Good grief, how ridiculous would that be.

A.) BTB — they divorce. She falls into a depressive cycle of drug use, finally whoring her body out and getting HIV, HPV, HepB through K, and syphilitic mania.

He latches onto a former millionaire-ese SI swimsuit model, invests well in the a wind-solar farm that bought land that happens to be on an uncharted oil dome of easily accessible sweet crude. Of course living happily ever after.

B.) RAAC — he sees more of the former woman he fell in love with in the frumpy, no make up, short haired reasonably “pretty” girl. They get back together. She really is reformed. She gets some of her beauty mojo back... but not too much. The kids are happy, he is happy, and she is happy. They all live happily ever after.

OK — IMHO, he left it open, but it’s a reasonably common ending on LW of the choice “is he better off with or without her”?

She never had out and out sex with anyone, though she did, as he said, cuckold him by the total lack of respect she showed him over a couple of years. But she “appears” — both in character, from reports by the girls, and physical appearance — to have been rehabilitated. I’m leaning pretty strongly the author is hinting at RAAC. They’d had 10 good years, and the last two bad years. Of course! Get a post-nup! Don’t be stupid.

If Evone was shown still dressing up, attempting to beautify herself with make up, dating, or any tiny sign of her former hautiness, I’d have said he was hinting at BTB.

I'm nearly always in favour of a BtB and moving on, but it seemed the wife really had learned her lesson here. Cutting her hair short to make herself look unattractive was quite a big step and I doubt she'd go back to her old behaviour. If she did, then just get a divorce... it's not like the husband was in any hurry to move on.

"where is that line exactly?"

The first time her behaviour feels disrespectful. She crossed that line, he didn't confront her and the problem escalated. If dialogue didn't make her change her behaviour, then he should have escalated his response. It took him two years to do what I would have done after my first warning.

Very well written. Good study of protagonist’s mind “vue” of realization that he has, in fact, been a cuckold.

In fact, interesting viewpoint that; cuckolding is not the actual sex, but rather the type of lack of respect — putting other men’s sexual interest (not necessarily actual sex) and romantic time in front of the husband’s — that constitutes cuckolding. “Honey, can you get me a white wine, and a beer for my Bull?” equals “Honey, can you watch my purse while I dry hump this guy who asked me to dance?”

Just for that unusual argument —5-stars.

IS in fact, different from justifying the divorce.

I would say that I scored you high marks for decent introspection in the narrative, and a compelling character description of the wife. In other words, a good setup.

But the lack of a conclusion is so glaringly absent, that it undoes the previous hard work. you KNOW that you didn't end this. How could you think it wouldn't affect scoring and response?

Thing is, you didn't even need a chapter break here. One more page, describing her swan song efforts at reconciliation. If you described HER finally getting past the empty and hollow "regret" soundbites, and actually get her around to showing and proving not just that she still loves him, but that she still needs him too, that she also proves to herself AND him, just exactly WHY she wants to remain married?? Then a RAAC is palatable, and perhaps different than usual LW fair.

However, in hubby's words, HE hasn't gotten to the place of understanding why he still wanted to be married to her. He's very right, that tears, and the same old worthless promises won't cut it. Imagine a second chance honeymoon where they go back to the sex resort in the islands? She has every opportunity to be with others, and so does he. But neither of them take any chances, actually because they realize neither of them have any interest in any one else? May be that is the path back to true monogamy and love. Although his respect isssues are bigger than her adultery potentials, that scenario can also be woven to include them both realizing how much they respect eachother, with a renewed sense of SELF-RESPECT, which in BOTH their cases, what had seem to be lacking before.

May be you'll come back to this. May be someone else WILL take up the balance. But either way, stories NEED TO BE Completed!!!

Good Luck!

It desperately needs another chapter so I hope someone writes one.

I agree with "Just_Words" comment but "Tajfa" is so far off base I won't comment on his/her offering The anon suggestion for HIM to go to counselling is a tack often taken by weak-minded masochists in these P.C. days! I think not... The easy thing to do is get rid of this worthless bitch! The kids are HERS! and probably old enough to choose who they want to be with(hopefully Her) unless he has any bonding with them! gOOD READ SO FAR (3*** for that) BUT it really needs an ending. My preference would be an expanded version of my last two sentences above... from "The easy thing to do is"

What’s he got to lose? Have her sign a favorable post nip and give her one more chance.

Story reminds me of BBs to Bullets but less annoying

Take her out on a date maybe to a museum or go camping. The club scene is for children. Find more mature things to do together, If she doesn't want to grow up, then get the divorce and find a better woman.

Interested in more of these two if you have it.

Post nup though post nip kind of works too

Enjoyed it

This would have been a much better story with proper punctuation.

This one is a pleasant surprise. There's lots of opportunity for a follow on and character development. This one is badly underscored, 5*

You can go either way with this... It will tell us a lot about you if there is a chapter 2

No grade yet. Good to see you back!

Déja-vu in deed!

I read this storyline multiple times on LW: average wife changes from duckling to swan, gets breast augmentation, becomes narcissistic and enjoys the attention of other males too much, putting aside any respect for her husband. Even without cheating, grave disrespect can destroy a marriage.

This version of the setup described above was well written, short to the point and full of emotion. Therefore, even without a proper ending (several commenters suggested a further chance with clear rules; I go with that) this story deserves 4*.

You can sense in the story the frustration and hopelessness of the husband. She was or became narcissistic and selfish. Her validation as a woman was more important than the disrespect and open humiliation of the husband. It's suspicious all the disrespect took place after her daughters grew up and she does not need any longer the financial support of the husband to raise them. Did she ever loved him as much as he loved her?

After a while the hope of the husband for a change gets old and the disrespect eats his soul of the joy of the relationship, and it's better to move on. Unfortunately for him, he still loves her to some degree, and seen her dressed and looking like the woman he originally met, could trigger the desire to give her another chance for she could be a changed woman. The author stopped in the dilemma stage and it's OK, since it's his story. I really liked it. It makes you think about the evolution of human relationships, like everything else, they change on time and not always for the better.

First my apologies for the misspelling in the title, I had intended Deja Vu and an extra e slipped in there.

I know it needs an ending and I know from other submissions I suck at them. Call it an experiment if you will but I didn't write an ending to this and let it out in the wild anyway. I know it's a questionable practice leaving it without a real ending, but so far it's been interesting to see the comments. I knew going in that there would be some harsh comments about the lack of an ending, but hey it's in Loving Wives and we are rather famous for harsh comments.

My Wife, again not the star of this story, hates movies that end without a real conclusion. I couldn't tell you how many times she's said "that ended dumb". Usually after that I try to explain or justify the ending as letting you make your own conclusion or telling her it gives us a chance to use our imagination for the ending, but maybe they are just lazy and didn't finish the damn story.

If I've learned anything from being fool enough to share my attempts at stories here it's that you can't possibly write a story everyone will like or agree with. That may in fact contribute to my block in writing effective endings. How do you know how to end it when no matter what someone is not going to agree? That's probably just a cop out too though.

I hadn't planned to do a follow up on this one and just writing an ending would be hard to make the minimum length for a contribution. Thanks for reading and thank you for the comments. Putting a story out there for people to read is scary to me, it opens a dangerous portal into my head that lets other peoples thoughts rattle around. It's a good feeling when people are pleased by my efforts, but sometimes the negatives can be just that, negative. At a minimum though my scribbling has made a few people take enough time to both read it and feel strongly enough to comment on it so I feel like I accomplished something.

Again thank you for giving me the gift of your time, I do appreciate it.

.....a fun part 2 if it has change of perspective. Wife or daughter telling the story from this point would be fun. I've always wondered why, in these stories that happen in "empty nest" why I've never seen one told completely by the child or children. This one would be especially interesting since the kids love him but he's not birth dad.

the low scores. Well written and good description of the straw that broke the camels back scenario. Liked it. Would like more, but not necessary. 5*

OKay - I skipped it.

Not much of a story line and the characters were poorly developed. It's probably about 10 percent of a real story. In this writer's world, it's okay to not use a spell checker and not pay any attention to punctuation and grammar. Take the writer's advice and just skip this... whatever it is.

Damn! That was focused, you managed to accomplish more in one page than many do in a novel. Bravo! In reality passive active aggression always works best in the scenarios/situations like you described, I suspect previous experiences are involved. You show A real talent in formulating the emotions surrounding this type scenario, In my humble opinion the confrontation" was the weakest part of the story & I would have liked to have seen your talented focus put to work more in the dialog!

Thanks again for a grate read.

That was a well written and thoughtful 'straw that broke the camel's back' story. Thank you.

I would say sit down with a lawyer, have a reasonable post-nup written up, sign it, and then give her one more chance. She will be aware that she is a Deja Vu fuck-up away from a divorce with no separation and react accordingly.

Really enjoyed this classically written piece by an excellent writer. I agree that no ending is required, the story is complete. Thank you

A slip of the nip from Schwanze1 gives us the post-nip agreement. If the wife gets a breast augmentation, aka boob job, then she shall be obligated to sign a post-nip to clarify any future division of assets should she slip (or sag) in her commitments. Naturally(haha), she will have to take the cost of said boob job out of her share.

Seems like it would have been simpler to take dance lessons. It wouldn't have killed his sorry ass!

"Déja vu"

are the boobs. As one who favors small to medium sized boobs I find that not as important as being natural and connected to the women carrying them. I just don’t see how a sack of silicone could ever be as attractive to see or feel as a natural shape, size and touch (tactile or oral). Certainly there are good, bad and great boobs but I can’t imagine any case where adding phony baloney makes them better. Give me a natural women.

Thank you author for sharing how writing makes you feel ... it is not a talent I have been able to pull off (I’ve tried, but they just didn’t get there) and I admire those that can do it so I wonder what it takes.

This is an ohio kind of story. As an author, ohio was the best at analyzing the roots of a relationship by letting us observe the course through counseling. Whether they reconcile or not is secondary to that journey through the psychology of the relationship.

Good story. I liked it. 5 Stars.

People will hate this because their's no burning, no reconciliation, and no (real) cuckolding.

The premise is nothing new. But that doesn't mean this is a bad story. I could appreciate it for what it was, and sympathize with the MC. I'd rate this in the 4-4.5 range. I rounded up to help offset the haters.

Liked it. Thanks.

Another lazy writer. News flash, if you feel the need to preface your story with an admonishment that it's not finished and to go ahead and skip it, you're a dick.

.... but having read your submission arkrebel I also don't understand the low score for this story (I gave it a "5"). A well written story detailing how your protagonist struggled with his feelings for the loving woman he married and the self centered person she had become. Like other comments your story has received, I would also like to see some sort of followup and/or resolution. Well done!

It was over when he agreed to let her get bigger tits. Just who did he think she was doing that for? Not for him, he loved her tits. Not for her, larger tits don't do anything for you personally. Larger tits are for show. And what kind of wife wants other men to admire her tits? Yeah, lots of women do, but no decent wife does.

How about a husband who gets surgery to get a larger cock? The wife loves his cock as is. A larger cock won't make him piss better. No, the larger cock is for someone other than the wife. So how legitimate is that?

Just another shallow tepid distant marriage that died somewhere during child rearing. They will both be better off if they go find someone who they can really commit to. Not saying that couldn't eventually be each other, but this arrogant self-absorbed prick teaser needs some serious head work.

Will rate the finished product, if its ever finished.

Sorry, I just can't identify with this at all. He still talks about being to blame for not putting his foot down earlier. It's true that he should have left her earlier, for good, her fault, but that doesn't bring him blame for the marriage breaking apart.

I gave it five stars because it dares talk about a topic that is very valid. Women do this. Especially women who never got to be popular in their youth. They say men are perpetually twelve and women fifteen. Well, if a woman never got to have fun at a young age, watch out in her late thirties or after the kids are out of the house. No man can "keep them in line" if they chose that path. I've seen it happen to family and friends. But yes, IT IS A CHOICE.

And once you ruin the trust in a marriage, what's left?

Who watched her purse when she was dancing with her husband? Why did he not just refuse to watch her purse? Enquiring minds want to know!

This was very well-written, and while I know that I'm going against the grain here, as everyone feels like stories here have to have definitive endings (mostly so they can decide based on whether they liked the ending to give them a thumbs up or down) I think this one very precisely fits the bill with it's ending left hanging. Ultimately, the big relationship questions this story posits are how much damage is too much damage, how much disrespect does it take to reach the level where one cannot recover from it, and how late to the party can one person in a relationship be in being selfish and in their realization that they are truly hurting their partner before they have truly lost them. I don't think there's a one-size-fits-all answer to those questions, and people don't always have an easy time deciding when a line has been crossed where there is no return, especially when, as the author describes, it's death by a thousand paper cuts or boiling the frog gradually. So to me the end of the story is a real one: trust has been lost, and it's unclear how the protagonist gets it back. It's not tied up in a neat little bow, but so little about life and relationships is all black and white, unlike most stories in the Loving Wives section.

Ultimately, either way you end the story -- the protagonist tries to forgive and forget, or at least give another chance, or decides it's too late -- is going to be anticlimactic in any event. The current ending maintains the tension, and I'm on board with that.

I believe you had the perfect ending. Leave it to us, your readers to use our imagination to conclude the story. Unfortunately, all to many have limited abilities when it comes to using intellect to draw a conclusion for themselves.

He is right that he opened the ways,,, But she seems to have hung herself.

Sometimes I seem to be difficult to impress with a good number of these stories but this one is very good. She probably did not have an affair but the damage to the husband's feelings and well-being can be quite debilitating and clearly personal.

Any part II?

Keep it up!

T.T.

I disagree with Moral compass. The ending fell flat. It was a good story until you went all "Eeyore the donkey" at the end. lol if she started to change and he wasn't apart of it through the counseling, shame on him. but she really seemed to have changed. I believe in burning too lol

Is this just a first chapter? It had no result. Story lacked drama and emotion, being depicted as a series of actions and reactions. It was obvious they didn't really love each other in the first place, as it was all a convenience thing.

I give yo cinque estrellas, mon.

Liked it a lot , just wish there has be more to enjoy.

Good to see he finally took some action(better late than never),but the ending leaves every thing up in the air.Hving seen how she is and what he has heard from his daughters,surely she is worth a last try?.

@UltHomeBody

If you read the author’s foreword or intro, you will often answer questions like “Where’s the sequel?”

It ain’t there ... may well never be there by the author. He told us as much, in advance, and suggested we move on if we didn’t like that.

I happen to think that LW should be about the marital adjustments that happen when Sweetie morphs into being ‘adventurous!’ InO.Words, I would have preferred (in this LW category) that arkrebel would have actually done that, or placed this tale in some other LIT category. But that did not obtain, I read it and liked it enough to give it a 4* rating.

What was once interersting for his wife lost it's attraction once she lost her husband.

She gambled and lost everything. But, the husband seeing his wife has changed, should consider a shot at reconcilaion through a professional.

Of how it can go wrong. But seeing she hasn’t gone out since the separation would have to wonder if she finally got it

In one of your other stories (I think it was yours) someone added a comment that the husband should ask the wife to remove the implants. See how serious she was about being with the husband. What is more important to her - the new tits for attention and I guess how she feels and cares how others see her versus the original her that her husband loved. Not sure if he should have it actually do it but knowing her reaction right up to the point of making the appointment would be good.

As for separations, I am not a fan. How do you heal when apart and you each date? What is it, legal cheating before you get together? You either stay together and work through the pain or you divorce. If you can't work through the pain as you see no progress or way out then divorce. Maybe as time passes you start over but it is new and not the old you try to repair.

I read it again and it really is an interesting story. Her behavior is unacceptable, this is true. However, she seems to have changed. Can he give her another chance? The real world is seldom BTB or RAAC. It is genuinely a tough call.

I get you wanting to be this edgy writer but leaving stories with no endings does nothing more than piss off your readers. Your main protagonist in your stories is also very unlikable as his ignorance, stupidity, and fear of addressing marriage ending issues in Every one of your stories leads him to teetering on the edge of reconciliation or going nuclear BTB.

This story is a prime example of what I said. He knew there was a problem but rather than taking the necessary steps to correct it before it got worse, he waited to take the serious steps when it was ALMOST too late. But then he is leaning toward it being too late even though her words AND actions show she changed.

Had he acted earlier like most of us normal people would have, the problem would never have gotten this bad.

Every thing the wife did was because either she had his approval or his lack of action seems to be a form of approval and this seems to be the same scenario in all of your stories.

Be careful what you wish for.

And these one is nothing but whining of a Stupid Moron.