Deprivation

We held each other close, swaying to the melody of a sappy love song played on the silent radio of our minds.

**********

As we released each other, she headed to the master bathroom. I followed close behind. I watched as she began to draw hot water for a bath.

"I have plans for us," she said as she poured bubble bath into the water, "and not just for tonight."

"Oh? Every night?" I said jokingly, half-expecting a dirty look and a jibe.

She rose from the edge of the tub and strode toward me, putting both her hands on my shoulders, getting nose-to-nose, leaning her forehead against mine. With a smile and a tear, she said, "The answer is always 'yes.'"

Oh, my Lord. She was dead serious. I was thunderstruck.

"Babe, a woman always has the right to say no..." I said.

"So does a man," she answered, "but it's not about rights. A couple belongs to each other and cares for each other. It's about love and -- just as importantly -- trust. I trust you to care for my well-being as much as yours. And I want you to trust me to care for your well-being as much as mine."

The imploring look in her eyes brought me to another epiphany. I actually didn't trust her to care for my well-being. At least not until now. I had been deprived for so long that I was finding it difficult to think in terms of her caring about my needs. And I could see that she knew it.

Those luminous eyes told me that she knew my pain. That she wished she could take it all away. That she was going to salve it with everything she had going forward. And that she desperately needed me to trust her now.

I felt a chink in the armor of my heart. And then I felt a seam burst. And then the whole damned chainmail fell off.

Forgiveness soared like an eagle inside me, dragging trust along for the ride.

Kat could see the transformation. She wasn't a mind reader, but she was a heart reader. She smiled a million watts and jumped -- literally -- into my waiting arms, wrapping her arms around my shoulders and her legs around my waist.

With her straddling me in that fashion, it took only seconds for my heart to speak to my dick. It was a very quick but meaningful conversation. Kat was wearing a fancy dress for our Valentine's / anniversary combination dinner, so she couldn't feel my hard-on through the layers of satiny fabric. But she could see it in my eyes.

"I think we need to get more comfortable," she said, smiling as she moved to turn off the tap to the bath.

She asked me to help with the zipper at the back of her dress, then quickly dropped it to the floor and stripped off her camisole and hose. When she got down to just her lacy red bra and panties, she turned her attention to undressing me.

It felt so good seeing the want in her eyes. When my shirt, pants, undershirt and socks were in a heap alongside her discarded clothes, Kat knelt in front of me. I could see an intoxicating mix of desire and mischief on her face.

"I'm going to suck your dick," my lovely Kat purred, tugging my boxer briefs to the floor.

Holy fuck, I thought. What has gotten into my wife?

The Word and heart of God, a still, small voice echoed within my brain.

I stepped out of my boxer briefs and kicked them aside to the pile of clothes accumulating on the bathroom floor. Kat grasped my swollen cock, beaming with a Cheshire cat grin.

She nuzzled the head of my penis, as if she were going to fuck me with her nose. Then she licked her lips, seconds before running her tongue down the length of my shaft to my balls. She licked the other direction until she reached the end, slowly and deliberately -- with her eyes fixed on mine -- took my cock into her mouth.

A stray thought wandered through my mind as I watched her begin to fellate me: Her scarlet lipstick matches her bra and panties.

And then another: That lipstick makes her look so wanton. God, I love it!

Then another: That bra and those panties have to come off...

Yes, I was lusting after my wife. And I was aware of her fashion choices.

I reached out and stroked her cheek during her next downward thrust onto my shaft. Is she trying to deep throat me? Sweet baby, don't gag yourself!

"Sweetheart," I said gently, "that feels so, so good. But don't make me cum in your mouth. At least -- not this time. I want to save my first burst for somewhere more meaningful. I want to be able to kiss you while I cum."

She let my distended and throbbing cock flop out of her mouth with a resonant pop. Her eyes and smile were aglow.

"I have something to show you," she said playfully.

"May I assist, m'lady?" I asked with a feigned British accent.

"Let's break another old habit," she said. "Panties first, this time."

I helped her slide her lacy red panties down her luscious, supple hips. As her nether region was revealed, I saw her pubic mound for the first time in a couple of months. Her blonde tuft was much the same as I remembered, with one delightful exception. It was trimmed into the shape of a heart.

"I did that this morning, hoping to get a chance to show you tonight," she said. "My heart belongs to you, always and forever."

The Cro-Magnon in me wanted to pick her up and sling her over my shoulder. And then bend her over and pound her pussy senseless.

But she wasn't a piece of meat -- and she wasn't a receptacle.

"Tell me what you'd like," I asked with sincerity.

"I want this in me," she said huskily, grasping my penis lovingly. "In my pussy."

Holy, holy fuck, I thought. Yeah -- I guess that's actually what it's gonna be.

"But Kat," I replied, the ghost of the Cro-Magnon quickly departing, "don't you want me to get you ready first?"

"You can eat me out if you want to after our bath," she answered, pointing at the steam rising from the bubble-filled tub. "I'd like that. But I'm plenty ready for you already." She pulled my hand down to touch the moisture oozing from her vagina. I began to rub her slippery labia gently.

"Right now," she said, "I just want to feel this monster cock inside my tight little pussy."

Holy shit! She can talk dirty with the best of them, I smirked inwardly, cheering her kahunas. Her beautiful pussy had indeed remained snug even after two babies. C-sections have their benefits.

Truth be told, my "monster cock" is only slightly above average. But hearing that my wife saw the very best in me was an incredible aphrodisiac. I felt like I grew an extra two inches just in that moment.

"Do you want to go back to the bedroom?" I asked as I helped her remove her bra.

"We've never done it on the toilet," she answered. "This could be a night of firsts."

Thank you, Jesus! I exulted. Was that blasphemy or blessing? I was traveling through uncharted territory.

"What exactly did you have in mind?" I asked.

"Well, since we installed those cushioned seats on all the toilets last year, it hasn't been so uncomfortable sitting down to pee..." she started.

"Or to take a dump," I laughed, "some of us stand up to pee."

"Well," she said, "how about you refrain from taking a dump this time, and instead help me with practicing my pole vault..."

She looked down demurely after she said it. What the fuck sort of demon has inhabited my wife? No, more like a naughty angel.

"I'm up for that," I teased, bringing her hand back to my rigid shaft. She led me by my dick over to the toilet.

As I sat down, I had a jarring thought. "Are we in the part of your cycle where you might get pregnant?"

Kat grinned with gratitude at my thoughtfulness. "No worries, Mark -- I have it taken care of," she said. "We still need to figure out what contraceptives we want to use long-term. But Margaret was able to give me some practical advice for the short term when I talked with her after the Bible study last night. I stopped by the pharmacy on my lunch break today."

That Margaret. I was going to have to give her a hug next time I saw her. The church needed more Margarets. The world needed more Margarets.

Kat straddled me -- both of us completely naked -- on the toilet, placing her hands on my shoulders to steady herself. "Ready or not, here I come!" she said.

"Don't cum just yet," I replied lamely.

Kat grinned again. She kept her left hand on my shoulder but gripped my love tool with her right. She pressed my throbbing cockhead against the precious flesh of her moist slit, then rubbed it back and forth.

I put my hands on her hips to assist with her balance. As she leaned forward, her beautiful tits began to call out my name. The blossom of her erect nipples gave them their voice. I leaned forward to suckle one, then the other, then back again repeatedly.

Kat continued to massage her labia with my rod. Suddenly, she found the spot. My love sword nestled with ease into her juicy sheath. She let gravity do its work, sliding down onto me until my shaft was completely enveloped by her warm furnace.

I came up for air from feasting on her tits. She was looking at me with the most adoring expression on her face.

"I love you, Mark," she whispered.

Thank you; thank you, Lord! My physical and emotional euphoria were taking me to new spiritual heights.

"I love you, too, Kat," I answered.

She leaned in to devour my lips, rocking back and forth on my shaft all the while. She began to moan, more vocal than I'd ever heard her. She leaned back and looked me in the eye.

"Your dick feels so good in my pussy!" she exclaimed unabashedly.

What? My brain had trouble processing what I was hearing. Did she watch the real estate porn video?

I beheld my lovely wife riding my pole, lost in ecstasy. We lost eye contact as her head swayed from side to side. She was quite obviously overcome with sensual pleasure.

"Fuck me so good, baby!" she cried out.

"Oh yeah," I said, lost for more meaningful words. I was in primal mode, beginning to raise up off the toilet seat with each thrust. We continued our lewd dance to the sounds of slapping balls and squishing snatch, escalating toward a volcanic crescendo.

"Give it to me, kochanie. Fuck me hard!" Kat shouted suddenly. I recognized "kochanie" as "baby" -- a Polish term of endearment I'd heard her parents use.

She's not following the script, I thought. She didn't watch the video. Then it hit me: This is who she is.

Kat was reverting to primal mode with me. She had been able to let go of her baggage. Hallelujah!

I needed no further encouragement. I stood up, hoisting her slim body while still joined at the crotch, and began to pound her sweet pussy from a standing position. When was the last time we did this? Never?

"Your monster cock is going to make me cum!" she shrilled, riding me harder.

Holy, holy fuck. Yes, indeed.

Her grip around my shoulders tightened. I could feel her pussy begin to pulse around my shaft.

"Cum for me, baby! Cum for me, Kat!" I cried out.

"Yes! Yes! Yeeeeeeesssssss!" she shrieked.

Her entire body rocked with spasms. At the same moment, my little sperm goblins decided it was time to make their appearance. My balls erupted with a seismic blast into her warm, willing depths.

I felt a gush all over my upper legs as my body shuddered with its final spurts. I must have cum a bucketload, I thought.

The gush splashed onto the floor -- once, twice, three times. More like a torrent, I thought.

I looked again. A clear liquid was pooling on the floor.

Holy fuck, I thought. Did Kat just -- squirt? Never in all our ten years had she done that. Tonight, she had truly let loose.

Kat looked down in shock at the floor. "Was that -- me?" she asked.

"Yes, baby," I smiled.

"Is that -- pee?" she asked.

"I don't think so," I said. "In the porn world, they refer to it as 'squirting.' It's a female ejaculation. I'm not sure of the medical terminology, but it's definitely not pee."

I wiped some of it from her inner thigh and licked, demonstrating my certainty that it wasn't urine. I was right.

Kat looked down in embarrassment. "I guess we should have stayed on the toilet," she said quietly.

"That - that was hot! Way hot. Don't even think about regrets," I assured her.

She laid her head on my shoulder. My now-flaccid cock slipped from her warm sheath.

"You can set me down," she said, "I don't want to wear you out. At least -- not yet." Her elfin grin held forth promise that threatened to stir my loins again. Already.

I stood her upright and kissed the top of her head. Then the tip of her nose. Then each breast. And finally, her scarlet-tinged lips. No tongue action, just a sweet but meaningful smooch.

"Water's getting cold," I said, "I'll towel the floor while you warm the bath."

Kat nodded and stepped into the bath, turning on the left tap. I mopped up her feminine emission, then went over to the toilet to take a leak.

It always took me a minute or two to piss after a strong ejaculation. Somehow, the inner workings of my urethra were unable to multi-task. They needed time to switch gears. As I waited, I noticed a familiar but all-too-rare aroma wafting to my nostrils. The smell of fresh pussy emanating from my dick.

Thank you, Lord, I thought again. And this time, I meant it in more ways than one.

As I joined Kat in our oversized Jacuzzi, she said, "Y'know, I'll be nice and clean after this bubble bath. What would you think of trying something that doesn't require contraception?"

I shrugged and smiled a dopey grin, momentarily puzzled. Another blow job? Me fulfilling my promise of cunnilingus? Sure, I'd enjoy either -- or both.

"I bought some lube while I was at the pharmacy," she said shyly, "I hear that you have to be really ready -- and patient -- to take it in the back door."

I caught the glint in her eye. She wasn't kidding.

Holy, holy fuck. A night of firsts, indeed.

**********

That next Sunday found our entire family at church. I enjoyed Pastor Rick's sermon immensely. Maybe he was better. Maybe I was better. Maslow's hierarchy and all.

After the service, while Kat and Dylan went downstairs to fetch Isobel, I went in search of a lady who deserved my undying gratitude. I spotted Margaret in the foyer, holding a cup of coffee and chatting with an elderly woman. I patiently awaited my turn until she was free for conversation.

"You may want to put that coffee down," I suggested.

"Oh?"

"Yeah," I said, "I owe you something."

She seemed confounded but curious. She set the coffee down on the reception desk.

I spread my arms in invitation for a hug. Margaret smiled and leaned into me. "Thank you," I whispered into her ear mistily, a tear leaking down my cheek.

"Somebody has to set the record straight," she whispered back. "God's plan for marriage isn't a life sentence -- or a death sentence."

We separated and mirrored each other's smiles. A young woman interrupted our moment, grasping Margaret's arm and asking to speak to her privately. No further words were necessary between us, at least not now. I nodded for her to follow the young woman.

I spotted Pastor Rick at his usual post by the exit door, making sure nobody escaped without a handshake and a word of encouragement. I stopped to greet him on my way to bring the car up from the parking lot.

"Hey, Pastor," I said, extending my hand. He smiled and shook my hand in return.

"Great to see you, Mark," he said.

"You, too," I answered. I hesitated, trying to decide how to frame my thoughts. "About that chat you offered..."

He nodded, silently encouraging me to proceed.

"Would you be free to meet me for coffee after work on Tuesday?"

"Any time, my friend -- any time," he answered.

"Yeah, well, I've been thinking. There may be something to this church thing," I said. "I think I could learn something worthwhile from you, and probably from some of the other people here. And I've been wanting to read more from that guy Paul..."

**********

THE END