All Comments on 'Destinee and Destiny Ch. 00'

I am looking forward to your continuing the development of your characters and their story. Please keep on "flushing" out the lives and relationships.

Thank you in advance for your efforts.

I gave you 5 stars because I love the story, but you may want to get an editor or a proof reader for the rest of your chapters as there are a few mistakes where the wrong word is used or an extra word that does not make sense is placed. I notice that happens a lot with authors on here that self edit or self proof read because they are to close to their own story and don't always see the mistakes. The story itself is a good story so far and I am looking forward to reading the rest of the chapters as they are posted. Hopefully you wont take too long in posting the rest of the chapters like some authors do. I added you as a favorite author for now and I am looking forward to seeing where this story goes.

Good start. Looking forward to the next chapter. Good character development and story flow. Thanks for your time and imagination.

The story is great, from what I've seen so far I expect a full blown epic. There were a few errors here and there but as one of other readers has suggested could easily be fixed by getting an editor. I can't wait to see what you have in store for us... really hoping for a slow burn with many chapters to come.

But have trouble. When your virginal girlfriend suddenly deepthroats and swallows, it means she is guilty of giving her vcard to some other dorkbreath.

Twice had to stop when they arrive at the uncle's house. Can only guess it was this uncle who punched her card.

At least in my version there was some sex.

Hey guys thanks for your support so far! Still trying to get a hold of an editor but the next two chapters are finished, im just waiting for them to be accepted from pending status.

I look forward to reading more.

The storyline seems intriguing so far. Clean, crisp writing, with an easy to read, but compelling style. I like it so far.

Just one thing: Brandon is 23, and 6 years older than Kristen. So she’s 17... and 7 months pregnant with her 2nd child. That’s one busy, young girl!