All Comments on 'Embrace'

That´s a nice story for a start. It´s a realistic relationship and it has humor too. They are believable and cute. The tale of a school teacher and the hygienist. You have to keep going on writing. Maybe a second chapter because there was no real ending here.Thank you and stay safe.

That was a great story! Looking forward to reading more of your work

A well crafted, romantic tale. I felt like I really got to know Aly and Brooke, and thoroughly enjoyed their erotic, well written love making. Well balanced story. Your first contribution to this site is 5 stars for me; I hope that you share more stories.

If this is your first effort at writing a story, Abby, then you deserve compliments. This is a delightful tale, all the more so for the slow-burn approach which I very much approve of. It's also a pleasure to see someone new on this site who can write well. So it's five stars from me.

A decent story and the characters were interesting enough. The restaurant scenes seemed overly similar; water, delaying the waiter by not looking at menus. You described Niyah twice with practically the same language. Once a character is introduced it's the reader's job to keep that straight, at any rate such similarity of language about meals or people just pulls your head out of the story. At least for me. Good story though. Better than some here I've read recently and I'd happily trust your skills enough to go on another adventure with you...

Extremely well done for a first effort. Many veteran writers don’t do this well on current stories. I hope you will write more. Your dialogues are well done. The test to me, is whether I can see the story as a movie. When I can see the scene as if it was happening live greatly enhances the experience. The sex was hot but sensual, important to me. Well done.

If this is the kind of your first story, I'd love to see more from you. I was craving for a story with love and sex in it not only the banging and found yours on top. And I'm so glad I did. Thank you for writing this one, it was an amazing time spent reading this. Good luck with your future stories. You are wonderful. ❤️

Very nice first story, I really enjoyed the real world aspect of it. However, I think the ending could have gone it little longer. Not in a hotel room. How did Ally tell her roommate about moving out? Does rookie become the dentist she wants to be? In my imagination things work out for the best, but I’d like the author’s to tell me. Overall, great start and I look forward to reading more from you. Thank you taking the time to share it.

I enjoy all types of stories on Literotica from the short, graphic one-offs to the very long and involved. Embrace, however, strikes the perfect balance! In a relatively small space you developed the characters to the point that the reader is emotionally invested in how the relationship will unfold. The time you took and skill you used in the build up made the coming out scene emotionally moving and the sex passionate and super hot. I hope you continue with this story and submit others... great writing!!

What a beautiful story !! I loved the romance .. well done .. thanks !! 🥰🥰

Great story, loved the build up very much. You should definitely keep writing.

One critique, you may want to tone down the repetition of certain things in the sex scenes ;

i.e - in and out wetter wetter etc. It’s not ‘bad’ per se just seems a little discordant for what’s actually happening. That said other than a few spelling errors and a cpl of words that I thought weren’t the right choice, a wonderful first story.

Thank you.

Really enjoyed the story Abby. Looking for additional chapters of these two lovely ladies.

Really enjoyed reading your romantic story Abby. Looking forward to the next chapter in the lives of these ladies.

I have to echo Slurpy's statement. This was a great story, but the ending felt like the end of a chapter rather than the end of a story. Clearly, you need to write a sequel about how their relationship progresses over the next year or so.

I try to find new stories and authors when i check literotica. I found yours by chance and was curious. As i started reading it, a slowly got invested in it. It hasa a great storyline and momentum. Very realistic (BTW, go teachers! ❤️) and relatable, I even got nervous and teary-eyed at the ending when she came out to her parents. It really is one for the books. Hope to read more of your stories in the future. 😊

A very sweet and beautiful first story. I loved it and look forward to seeing more from you. I hope we get to read more about Aly and Brooke.

I gave you 5 stars, you deserve them. If this was your first story to be published i think you made a very good job of it. The characters were interesting and likeable. The excitement in their love well explained and believeable. I will certainly read your next story.

Take more time to develop the characters of your next couple and try for a little more dialog.

Thank you for this story, i really enjoyed the ride!

Truly wonderful to read. I found no fault in writing or flow, a few parts seemed a little brief but I would gladly read a story 3 times this length with characters like this. I think there may have been a spelling error or two but nothing detracted from the tale. I would gladly read more like this be it a new story or a continuation. If writing is a deep desire do yourself as well as us a favor and continue. We don't all have the courage to publish what dwells within and those like you give people like me a little more courage to try.

Wow; very impressive, especially for a first. Hoping we read more from you.

Five stars. Would love to read the continuation of this story and others from you in the future.

Lovely. When it’s YOUR story you can have parents say things lovingly. 😎 ❤️

Excellent story, strong characters, great character development! I sense this is a personal story for you! Please grace us with more! Sex was very hot!

Best Regards,

Kathy

Embrace ...... We have to learn to embrace us, to accept us, to love us, to free us from our burdens we have carried for long times after being raised and educated, so we had to wear blinders to become a good part of the society and a beloved kid ...... Yeah this tale is showing the fear loosing LOVE & TRUST ...... Its a wonderful romantic story with lovely details and well described emotional moments ...... Great work great written

Ten hearts 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

wait is that how it ends? is there going to be more to this story? Feels like a pretty abrupt ending if this is how it ends. Great story but if there isnt more to it then IMO it could have been so much better

A few suggestions:

1. Nouns, when used as names, are capitalized. For example, Honey, Sweetie, Mom, Dad. If not a name, do not capitalize. For example, The bee made honey. That is my mom.

2. Watch punctuation and capitalization, particularly around quotation marks.

3. One doesn’t go to med school to be a dentist. It’s called a dental school.

4. As noted beforehand, the ending was quite abrupt.

Good luck with future writing.

Very good for a first story. As I'd expect out of a teacher. And one with, maybe, a little chip on her shoulder about her profession not being respected. I worked in education my entire life and yes, a little more respect would definitely be appreciated. But you managed not to soapbox too much, so good on you.

The story was just a bit "too smooth", in that everything went right, across the board. A little suspense does every story good, even a pure romance (think Jane Austen). In these romances, the ending is something of a foregone conclusion, but it doesn't hurt to scare us a bit along the way.

Now I will read House of Sand …

Aly's comment to Brooke when she handed Brooke the note was perfect, and in Aly's character. I don't know how long it took to come up with that particular phraseology, but it was well thought out.

loved the storey. will read another one now.

Every part of the story well thought out and structured. All characters great = well done.

What a lovely story..

I just wish there was more, and marriage too..

I'm such a romantic, and can't get enough..

But thanks for this lovely story

Greetings

Belinda

Excellent! An amazing love story. Your writing style is wonderful, you drew me in to the characters immediately. I want more of Brooke and A,y. Please!

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

This is a really, really good story!

You write so wonderfully, your stories have so much substance, the characters, the scenarios, in total really enjoyable and believable!

Is there going to be a part 2, please?

Thank you for sharing this!

5 stars plus many more!

Very good story (like your others) and amazing sex. Beautiful.