All Comments on 'Equally Separate'

Jim Crow did nothing wrong

i didnt like it could have been better, there were time where he didnt seem racist just a shy person i guess, so no

So who was supposedly the racist and the rapist? If raping someone is how you destroy an enemy and make them a friend then I guess the prisons need to be emptied of rapists?

I think everyone has the right to speak their mind or write what the like but as a reader of loads of stories, that one seemed messed up to me or perhaps I just don’t understand what point was attempting to be made.

I like the premise! I just thought the buildup was a little confusing? Is Mark supposed to be seen as a racist or just someone who's ignorant but threatened to be exposed as a racist? Was Jasmin manipulating him the whole time? I'd love a part 2!

This was just so incredibly bad. When your 'message' overshadows your 'story' you've done a bad job of storytelling. When your message overshadows your story and your message and story are unclear you've just wasted people's time. Your "racist, sexist, antagonist" came across as a socially awkward crippled kid (who was probably also heavily medicated for his broken legs). Your SJW "heroine" came across as a schizo rapist. If you wanted to write this story in an interesting manner you should have written it from Mark's POV. Or even switched between the two with internal monologues about what was happening. Imagine Mark's conflict of either being raised as an actual racist or just a completely socially inept guy constantly misunderstood (shit was Mark on the spectrum this just gets worse for Jazmin). So let's go with Mark being a racist and the conflicting feelings of his racist upbringing and the feelings Jazmin is inspiring in his body. Then we get Jazmin, she fucking hates Mark, he's a racist POS but why did she feel so much power sucking his cock but also enjoyed the submission to him at the same time? Then as she rode his white devil cock it touched her in ways that she never thought were possible, seriously, why was this white guy's dick the biggest most perfect cock she'd ever had? Back to Mark, he hates Jazmin for making him do these vile things with him, his parents would disown him if they ever found out. This slut was showing just how true everything they said about black women was true, but why couldn't he stop? Why did he want more? Was it the painkillers? Were they messing with his mind? Then we get to the end, Mark tries with everything he has left to not cum and it's working, he's focusing on his hate for this woman. Then back to Jazmin, she's going to cum. She thought she could just make this redneck incel cum quick, but he's lasted too long, his cock is too big, and shaped just right. She explodes. Mark's eyes pop open to see his hands on Jazmin's big soft tits and her pussy begins to pulse in a way he's never felt before. He doesn't know she's cumming until the short gasping moans start and she starts milking his cock. Jazmin's eyes open wide as she feel Mark painting the insides of her womb. Only then does she remember she's not on the pill. Mark still firmly inside Jazmin says "You stupid black whore, what the fuck have to done?" Jazmin is pulled out of her post orgasm bliss by the harsh words "I just made a baby with you, filthy cracker. I look forward to aborting it. And I'm going to make sure everyone knows it was yours, you really should have made your social media accounts more secure." Then Mark is left laying in his bed, head in hands. Jazmin, looking back, thinks she broke him. She was only half right, she broke him and remade him in that one night. to be continued...

Please write a sequel! Thanks!

Girl........ that thing was 🔥.. please tell me there is more to the story!!!

I would like to think that Jasmin would keep having sex with Mark. After clearing that she wasn’t pregnant, and that she wasn’t gonna get him locked them. Then she proceeds to train the racism out of him by teaching g him about sex, and maybe getting some of you friends to have sex with him as well.

Maybe ending with him actually starting a family with her.

And him dropping n-bombs on her in bed could become her kink?

Some ideas for a possible sequel?

Ok, I didn't see it going that way so you caught me off guard there. Me thinks Jasmin went about it all wrong but it's definitely an interesting and odd point of view from Mark as well as Jasmin. I'm actually confused and hope some clarification can be made in the next chapter.