Ericka Eric 02

Ericka Eric 02

It's always nice when someone acknowledges your good deeds, isn't? I mean, I didn't much, but a few people recognized it and to be honest, I appreciated the glow up moment when Jack came over to thank me for helping out with his sister's 21 birthday celebration. Even though Jack isn't a big fan of boys who wear the wrong type of clothing.

"Well Jack, it's surprising to see you at my front door on a Saturday afternoon. And by the way, if you're here to face punch me because I'm hotter than the girlfriend you don't even have yet and Saturday afternoons are for the left side face punching and the left side only, so what do you want?"

"Alright now, Eric or Ericka or whatever. Kaylee and her friends told me about what you did and Kaylee said that I should acknowledge that you exist, so I'm sorry for being such a bitch towards you in the past. I'm also sorry that I'm not up to date on my swag bag lingo, but being you and all, I suppose you went all out and probably got the blue swag bags or something and yada, yada, yada, everyone was happy, so good job, Ericka. Geez."

Wow! Talk about having a bully by the balls! I mean, I had to check that I wasn't sleeping by pinching myself.

"Wow, Jack, I wasn't expecting all that, but thanks, I guess. But I must be honest and tell you that I merely sponsored the swag bags and Andi did much of the other work. I mean, yeah, we went all bat crazy and pulled together blue and red swag bags and all, but it wasn't just me. But I'll take the credit, LOL."

"Whoa, wow, red and blue swag bags? I mean, that's top shelf stuff, I guess. Alright, I guess I said my peace and made my apologies, so I'll be going now."

"Well, wait Jack, um, I do accept your apologies and I do feel a little vindicated now, but I'm not sure that I can't fully expunge you yet from everything in the past, but an hour or so at your bonfire tonight might help me work through that. I might even feel compelled enough to anonymously drop a few nice comments over some of your ridiculous, I mean your famous bicep selfies on Chang."

"Oh, well, my sister Kaylee, right? She might not be too happy about you expunging me because the two of you are friends and all, but I suppose you can hang out with my boys tonight and if I don't need to know anything about it, maybe you can expunge Nate. And for Pete's sakes, serve everyone a beer and not just Nate. And for the other Pete's sakes, cover up with a hoodie and no bright red lips. I mean, me and my boys have reps!"

"Fine! Black lip gloss and a hoodie it is! Anything else or should I just man the wood?"

Wait, what? What did I just say to Jack?

"Well, see that you do man the wood. And don't be shy about stating out loud that you might need some help carrying my wood, you know, because of my famous biceps and all. But be really shy about expunging Nate out in the open."

LOL, nope, just his lack of knowledge about swag bags, LOL, he has no idea what expungement means. Unless it has became slang lately, which might mean I got myself in trouble. Again.

"Alright, that's about all the "being nice" I can take for now, Ericka, so are we through for now?"

Well, I'm not claiming that I had Jack on the ropes or anything, but I know I had him flustered with all that expungement talk that he didn't quite understand. So, you know, strike when the iron is hot.

"We're through for now Jack and I actually look forward to manning the wood tonight and speaking with Nate. However, to be the best Ericka I can be tonight, I will shower and shave in a few minutes and I'm only telling you that because you might do better if you trimmed the forest down there. So, Jack, without saying anything to Kaylee, would you like me to shave you? I've gotten pretty good at it and I know just how to grip it and you will feel like a new man. With ridiculous biceps. And all."

See? Swoosh! Squeal! Peel out! Gone.

After that, I stuck to the rules. I mean, I wear a hoodie all the time, so that was easy and I selected a pair of Denim shorts that had a "man the wood" label on the inside of waistband. And thanks to a hair tip from Andi while we were shopping for the swag bag items, I tied my ponytail way up high on my head as opposed to my usual below the neck spot. I mean she said it would bounce that way and she wasn't wrong. Also, Andi bought me a novelty collar and leash while we were shopping, so I slipped that on and tucked it under my fully zipped-up hoodie. I mean, it's a novelty joke and all, right, so no harm, no foul, LOL, right?

And then I showed at Jack's just after dark to you know, man the wood. I mean, not in front of Kaylee or anything, but I knew she wasn't sticking around.

"OMG, Ericka, ooh, smooch, smooch, wow, smooch, smooch, did you ever make the girls happy last night with those bat crazy blue and red swag bags, smooch, smooch. I mean, ooh la, la, right? I also mean that I took some of the credit, but smooch, smooch, you're the best!"

"Ah, you know Kaylee, Andi found all of the stuff and put the swag bags together. So, are you hanging around for your brother's bonfire? And he came by to apologize earlier today, so thanks for that."

"You're welcome, Ericka and no, we're not staying here tonight. I mean, it's still my 21st weekend, so we're going to Candi's Corner. Plus, I love you Ericka, but I'm not ready to watch you make a play on Nate. I mean, the word is that you're manning the wood and all tonight, so you be you and I'll try to not get pregnant in the Ladies Room at the club. Or in the Men's Room. Oh, and by the way Ericka, the next time that you tell a guy that you're going to expunge him, well, you better be sure that he knows what that means!"

Sure, hind sight is always 20-20, right. Also, in hind sight, geez, I should have selected another pair of Denim shorts to wear. Something a little more modest like stand back a little and look at the wood or something. But I was there and Nate was there and six other guys were staring me down and SOB, I should have selected the "wood, what wood?" Denim shorts!

"Hey Nate, no babe, sit. I'll get you (and geez, everyone else) a beer. But listen Nate, I have a plan for tonight and I might need your help in a little while, OK? And my timer is down to 51 minutes. Also, shoot, I'm sorry for letting "babe" slip out just now."

"Well, I can forgive that because the others have diverted all of their energy to their eye balls now, so I'm sure they didn't catch that, but do tell, does your required help involve any expungement? In my favor?"

"LOL, we'll see, but my timer is down to 48 minutes and Jack has me on a tight leash, which I secretly tucked inside of my hoodie if that's of any interest to you. See?"

Well, the collar made for a nice choker and all, so, well, so what? Besides, it's just one of those novelty collar and leashes and not nearly strong enough to use against me. Like if someone wanted to drag me to a non-descript white windowless van.

"That's hot, Ericka, hey, are you going to have a few beers? While you man the wood."

"Wow, I don't know Nate, I don't drink a lot and I'm afraid that I might get a little tipsy, so I should stick manning the wood dry for now."

"Damn! Dry? Did I seriously say man the wood dry? To Nate?

Anyways, with my timer under 40 minutes, I put my plan into action. I mean, I had to distribute one round of beers to "everyone" first, but I didn't let that slow me

Now, first, I whispered into Brad and Troy's ears what 'expungement" meant and totally deflated their egos and probably their boners.

But after that, I headed straight into Jack's garage and searched around for his two wheeled dolly. And then once I found it, I made sure that no one followed me into the garage so I could man their wood. And then I waved Nate over to the keg barrel because I couldn't lift it onto the two wheeled dolly and boom, beer on wheels!

And I still had 33 minutes on my timer. And a train wreck in Jack's garage because the two wheeled dolly wasn't quite right up front. And Nate's attention.

"LOL, you are too smart for your undies, Ericka, but beer on wheels might get you a regular invite."

"Well, that would be pretty cool, Nate."

"Listen, I'm just as behind on my expungement as I am with modern swag bags these days, so, you know, um, who expunges who? I mean, I used to know and all, but modern times, right?"

LOL, modern times!!!! Nate's 22. I mean, he is modern times and all.

"Well, I suppose if I use my mouth on you, then I would be expunging you, but if you fuck me, then you would be expunging me. I mean, it might be different these days, but back in the day, right Nate?"

"Hmmm, Ericka, are we going to..."

"Nate, my timer is down to 26 minutes, so I'm going to go gain some crew points with my beer on wheels and you're going to figure out the what, how and where of what happens when you walk me to my SUV in now 24 minutes."

Ah, no, I don't know what the hell I just said to Nate about the logistics of things, other than we're probably going to expunge one way or the other. And notice that I didn't throw the word logistics out at Nate because I didn't want him to come up with a modern interpretation of freaky feet sex stuff. Even though I was blessed with better feet than I should have for a guy.

And while Nate was on his phone searching for word definitions, I put my beer on wheels to good use and made my final round with the other guys.

"Damn Jack, this one should be regular now, right? I mean, beer on wheels and all."

"HEY, "this one" has a name, Brad! (LOL, as I pointed the beer keg nozzle towards his crotch)"

"Oops, the boyfriend has fire, so having him around isn't all that bad. Welcome to the group, Wheelie Ericka."

"Stop with that talk Brad, it's embarrassing. Anyways, Butch, a refill????"

"Oh, a refill and a peek at that collar and leash, Wheelie! I mean, whip that hoodie zipper down and give us all a little a show and a pull."

There is one in every crowd, am I right folks? Every crowd has a clown. Every stupid crew has a stupid idiot. I mean, I peeked him the leash and collar and all, but still, right?

And I managed to finish a complete round with little more logistic issues, but LOL, I was a one done server. I mean, full beer kegs and a barrel full of ice is heavy and it was harder to push the two wheeled dolly than I expected.

"Well, Nate, I manned the wood, I put the beer on wheels and my timer is down to 12 minutes, so what did you come up with for our finale, if you want a finale with me, that is. I mean, I kind of like you and I could be with you."

"Oh, and I like you too (once a week), Ericka, but listen, we have plenty of time with 12 minutes on the clock. I mean, you're tight and it won't take more than 3 or 4 minutes for you to emancipate my first nut."

"Ugh, expunge, Nate! But anyways, I know you'll pop quick, but then there is the cuddling time and then the kissy face time and then some more cuddling time and then maybe you'll want that freaky foot stuff, which would lead to more kissy face time and then you know, some more cuddling time. So?"

"WHAT? What ever happened to blow and go, Ericka (once a week or so)?"

"Well, with these modern times and all, Nate."

End Ericka Eric 02